by Lori Saltis
When we reach a stoplight, Bridie turns to Kai. “It’s good of your grandparents to send us that money. I don’t like taking charity, but this can’t be helped. Besides, I suppose they might feel a bit guilty.”
“Why?” he asks. “Because they were never nice to you?”
“No.” The word holds a trace of bitterness. She pauses as the light turns green and the car accelerates. “I mean because they encouraged me to marry Bill and move to San Francisco. They told me we should make a fresh start in a new place.” She gives a soft snort. “They can’t be blamed. Who knew it would turn out like this? And now we’re off to make a new start.”
She pulls into a gas station on Third Street. While she fills the tank, I walk with Lennon across the street to the light rail platform. We head for the far end, to a bench surrounded by Plexiglas walls, and huddle into the corner. My throat squeezes too tight for me to talk. Our foreheads touch. I close my eyes and open my lips with a soft gasp. Our kisses make me press against him as our arms wind around each other. It feels so good and hurts so much. How can I feel this way, knowing I’ll never see him again?
The rails began to rattle. The train is a block away, stopped at the light.
I clutch his shoulders, my fingers digging into his jacket. “Can’t you at least tell me your real name?”
His whisper is so soft, I almost don’t catch it. “Paul.” Then he sucks in his breath. “But that’s not me anymore. I’m Lennon.”
“Paul.” It doesn’t sound like him. “You’re right. You’re Lennon.”
His small smile quickly disappears.
The train starts moving. I speak quickly. “Which clan?”
He shakes his head. “It’s better if you don’t know. I’m in a lot of trouble. I don’t know if I’ll survive.”
“Let me help you.”
“You have. Letting me stay with you, giving me hope.” He clasps my hand and holds on tight, his chocolate brown eyes so sad. “I hope I see you again someday.”
The train pulls into the station. The doors slide open.
Tears fill my eyes. “I don’t know where I’m going to be.”
“Me, neither.”
He stands. Kisses my cheek. Releases my hand. Backs away until he has to step aboard the train. The doors close. He stares at me through the window as the train rumbles out of the station.
He’s gone.
I draw my knees to my chest and bite my trembling lip.
Kai runs across the platform, his face lit with a smile. “I got another email from my grandparents. They’re buying us plane tickets. We’re going back to London.”
I blink. The tears slide down my cheeks. I finally got what I wanted. “Good.”
Chapter 30
Lennon
I wipe my eyes on my sleeve. It feels like a hole has been dug in my chest. This is almost as bad as losing Mom and Dad. I’d finally found someone to trust – and I could have trusted her. I could have told her everything. That might have made me feel better, but what about her? Penny and her family have enough problems. They don’t need the Two Dragon Clan breathing down their necks. So, I stay silent, I say goodbye, and I lose my best friend forever. I guess I should feel good about that, but I feel like shit.
I have to pull myself together. I can’t face Tony looking like a crybaby. I wipe my face again and move into another car where no one has seen me look so weak.
I planned to switch from the K to the N at the ballpark, but when the train stops at the station, a throng of baseball fans climbs aboard, with tons more waiting on the platform. They’re acting all cocky and rowdy, so the Giants have won. Are they in the playoffs? I usually pay attention to stuff like that, but now, I don’t have a clue. It’s a weird feeling, to not care, to not want to listen to the loud chatter of the people pressing close around me. I want earphones so I can drown them out.
I wait until the train reaches the Civic Center station to switch to the N. It’s still crowded, but the passengers are less noisy, allowing me some space for my thoughts.
Pay your obligation to the girl and return to your family.
I don’t think I can ever pay my obligation to Penny. If it weren’t for my parents, I would have said fuck all and stayed with her family. I feel like part of my heart is still sitting in the car with them.
Power without wisdom is useless and you are not wise.
I’m not going to become wise in the next ten minutes. Mastering the Dragon Shout has given me some leverage, but I can’t take on the whole clan. So what can I do? I lean my head against the cold glass window, letting it roll with the motion as the train heads out of downtown and into the Sunset district. I’ve been drained of so much energy – internal and external – I want to go somewhere and sleep for a month. My eyelids droop. I blink hard, because if they close, I’ll see a girl with green eyes and a brave smile who dances like a fairy.
A shaky breath rattles my chest as the N reaches the stop at Ninth and Irving. I push myself down the steps and off the train. As it trundles away, I force myself to not sprint after it to the next stop. It’s heading for the beach. What will I do there? Sleep in the sand? That doesn’t sound so bad, but it’s not like I have a choice. I gave my word. I push myself again, down the street in the direction of Auntie Cat’s house.
The street is quiet. Only a handful of restaurants are still open and even the din from the local bars is subdued now that the game is over. It feels weird, walking openly down the same street that I crept along a few weeks ago. I put my hood up because of the wind rather than trying to hide my identity. When I reach Auntie Cat’s place, the front door is unlocked. I step inside soundlessly and stand in the entryway with my arms folded. The hall light is on, but it’s so quiet, I wonder if anyone is home. Going to the right will lead to the bedrooms and the kitchen. Going to the left leads to the front room. I turn that way, but can’t seem to want to make myself move.
Soft footsteps sound behind me. I turn. Auntie Cat’s steps falter. We stare at each other for a moment. She’s wearing jeans and a dark pullover sweater, and her hair is tugged back off her pale face. I’m pretty sure she’s older than Bridie, but she seems younger. She’s never married or had kids, and sure as hell didn’t sign up for the mess I brought on her, which makes me feel even worse.
“You’re back.” Her mouth stretches as if she’s trying to smile, but can’t.
I take off my shoes, hoping she sees this as more than politeness, that I intend to stay. I place my Vans on the shelf beside the door, next to a pair of trainers that look way too big to belong to her.
“Are you hungry?” she asks.
I shake my head. The pizza sits like a lump in my stomach.
“Your brother is waiting for you.”
“He’s not my brother.” I speak louder than I intended. Then I wince, knowing Tony must have heard.
“He thinks of you as his brother. This has been a very hard time for him,” She sucks in her breath, “For all of us.”
I feel like such a little shit. All I’ve thought about is my pain and loss. I’ve barely considered how other people must feel. I clear my throat, but my words still come out raspy. “Dad was your brother and Mom was your friend. I’m really sorry about…” There’s so much to be sorry about, I don’t know where to begin. “About everything.”
The chill thaws from her eyes and she gives a little nod.
I reach out to her using the Silent Speech. Tony said his mom has cancer. Is that true?
Yes. Pancreatic cancer. It’s inoperable. She’s dying.
Karma is a bitch and so is cancer. Auntie Sylvia will pay for her crime with lots of pain and suffering. I try feeling satisfied, but can’t. Tony and Aaron will suffer as well, and Mom still won’t have any justice.
Whatever you think of your aunt, don’t take it out on your cousins.
I don’t blame them. But I still want Tony and Aaron to acknowledge their mother’s guilt. I speak aloud. “Can I stay with you?”
Auntie Ca
t’s hands go to her hips. “If I can trust you not to run away again.”
“I won’t, as long as no one tries forcing me to go back to China.”
“As long as I have custody of you, I won’t let that happen, I promise.”
Some of the tightness eases from my chest. “I’ll see him now.”
In the front room, Tony stands like a sentinel, staring out the bay window. Has he been standing there every day since I left, knowing this is the one place I’d eventually turn up? My stomach drops. I owe him some kind of apology, but I don’t have words for it.
I stop in the middle of the floor as he turns. We stare at each other. Tony doesn’t blink. Neither do I. It feels weird. Almost like we’re equals. Are we? Do I really think he has nothing more to teach me? Suddenly, I wish I could drop to my knees, bow my head and humbly ask Big Brother for forgiveness.
Instead, I perch on the edge of the sofa. “You okay?”
After a moment, Tony sits in the armchair, rigid as a soldier. There’s no taking the chill from those eyes. “Where have you been all this time?”
I can refuse to answer or lie, but I don’t want to. I’m tired of being a fake, both as Lennon and as Paul. It’s time my relatives know who I am and what I’m capable of. Auntie Cat lingers by the door. “Auntie, sit down, okay?”
After a moment’s hesitation, she sits beside me. Neither she nor Tony look at each other. I can feel the tension between them. Our family is divided and it’s all because of me. I suck in air. No, it’s the murderers who are responsible, not me.
“Most of the time, I was in the Haight.”
Tony shakes his head. “We checked all the shelters. You weren’t in any of them.”
“I wasn’t in a shelter. I hooked up with a gang of kids. I begged and stole.”
Now Tony and Auntie Cat look at each other, exchanging surprised glances. I roll my eyes. “How do you think I survived? Would you be happier if I said I ate out of garbage cans? Cuz I did that, too.”
Tony stands and glares down at me. “Who did you steal from?”
I stand and meet that glare. “I posed as a hooker and robbed guys who wanted blowjobs.”
Auntie Cat gasps.
Tony blinks. His lips thin into a tight line before he speaks. “You’re lying. Trying to shock us.”
“Nope. It’s the truth.”
“Does the Beggar Chief know this?”
Now I blink.
“John Walks Long claims he’d taken in a street kid named Lennon who fit your description. He refused to tell me where you went.”
I swallow hard. I’ve been taught that honorable men don’t lie. Now I know that instead, they twist the truth. Still, it’s strange how easily the words come. “The Beggar Chief knew me as Lennon.”
“Did he know you as the Dragon Son?”
“I’m not the Dragon Son. I’m Lennon, a beggar and a thief who walks the Wayward Way.”
Auntie Cat jumps up and steps between us. She addresses Tony. “There’s no point in this. He’s been through a lot. You can talk to him another time. He’s promised to stay with me. Let’s leave it at that.”
Tony doesn’t budge. “You are the Dragon Son and you will walk the Glory Road as a true Xia.”
Neither do I. “Tell Head Elder this. I want to know why he ordered your parents to kill my mother and father. And I want him and them to face the justice of the clan. Until then, I am Lennon, not Paul. There will be no Dragon Son.”
I’m pretty sure he’s going to punch me and I’m going to let him. My way of apology. But then he turns and strides out of the room. Moments later, the front door slams shut.
If we turn aside from righteousness or forget kindliness, may Heaven and Earth destroy us.
Auntie Cat grabs hold of my shoulders. “I know you’re hurt, but if you continue on like this, your brother won’t forgive you.”
My eyes fill with tears. I take a sharp breath to force them back. I don’t need righteousness or kindness. I need justice, and if this is what it takes, then, “Good.”
The story of Penny and Lennon continues in Folly: Book 2 of the Crossroads Series. You’ll find a sample chapter at the end of this book.
Sign up for Wandering Times, the official newsletter of the Crossroads, and receive exclusive offers as well as bonus content and news of upcoming releases. Click here to sign up: http://eepurl.com/ch—E9
Acknowledgements
I want to thank Jennifer Gagliardi and Meej Jupin for their support and encouragement throughout the years. Thanks also to my friends and family for all the love. Thank you to editor L.J. Redding for proofreading this manuscript.
I want to acknowledge the following sources for research and inspiration for FAKE and the world of the Crossroads. My heartfelt gratitude and appreciation to them all.
Wuxia, the literary genre of Chinese martial arts, including novels, movies, TV shows, and games. The Beggar Clan is a creation of wuxia and can be found in all its forms.
The Water Margin by Shi Nai’an
The Return of the Condor Heroes by Jin Yong
Gypsy Boy and Gypsy Boy On the Run by Mikey Walsh
The Gypsies by Jan Yoors
Strowler speech is based on Thieves’ Cant. My main source is the website of Stephen Hart. http://www.pascalbonenfant.com/
The following song lyrics and oaths in this book are attributed to these sources which are all in the public domain.
Chapter 3, song lyrics, “Raggle Taggle Gypsy”
Chapter 3, song lyrics, “Black is the Color”
Chapter 4, Oath of Fraternity, from The Romance of the Three Kingdoms by Luo Guanzhong
Chapter 19, song lyrics, “A Begging I Will Go”
Chapter 19, song lyrics, “A Beggar I’ll Be”
Chapter 19, The Oath of the Canting Crew, from The Life of Bampfylde Moore Carew by Robert Goadby
About the Author
Lori Saltis loves writing, traveling, and being a big geek. She was born in San Francisco, the city of her heart, her forever home where she finds endless inspiration while wandering its streets. Discovering the extraordinary in the ordinary world is the compelling force of her writing.
An actor and a playwright, her shows have been produced at a variety of venues including the San Francisco Fringe Festival. While working as a freelance writer, her articles appeared on various websites including USA Today.
To find out more about the world of the Crossroads, check out her website loriwriter.com and subscribe to her newsletter Wandering Times http://eepurl.com/ch—E9. You can also find her on twitter @loriwriter.
Folly
Chapter 1
Penny
I’m at the Auld Sod and the last person I expect to see is Lennon.
Literally, the last person.
When we first returned to San Francisco, I thought I saw him everywhere, around every corner. I searched so many faces and never found him. It took nearly a year for me to accept he was gone and I’d probably never see him again. I guess my heart should’ve healed by now. I thought I’d finally let him go.
This evening started out pretty typical, performing on stage with my family for the pleasure of Sharpers, Strowlers and the Upright Man. No, not Kingfisher. Bridie’s brother, Christy, found out what he’d done to us and flew from Dublin to San Francisco in a fine rage to challenge that bellend for the position of Upright Man. What a glorious bout that was, watching Kingfisher getting bounced and trounced about the ring until he wound up bloody and unconscious at my uncle’s feet. I cheered myself hoarse. Even thinking about it now gives me a glow of happiness.
As is the way with Strowlers, Kingfisher was sent packing and Uncle Christy took over the San Francisco Nest. Couldn’t be more ideal for my family, right?
Yeah, right.
Christy is sitting at the exact same table that Kingfisher used to leer at us from. Seated beside him is his wife, Auntie Joanne, who, unlike poor Doreen, is the acknowledged and honored Mother Bird of our Nest. They’re surrou
nded by their children and generously buying drinks for the entire pub. It’d be the craic if it weren’t for the presence of yet another Likely Lad.
Among Strowlers, a Likely Lad is a young cove coming into his own. He’s got his first trailer and is ready to travel apart from his family. The only thing stopping him is want of a wife.
I think you know where this is going.
Since I turned eighteen, Uncle Christy has taken every opportunity to parade me before whatever Likely Lad has blown into the Nest that week. Or is it the other way around? Doesn’t matter. I always give a flat out no. I’m sure most of them say the same thing because I am naught but a sour bitch when it comes to their ilk. Hope springs eternal in Christy’s breast because he hasn’t given up. He doesn’t know me well enough to realize he can’t wear me down.
I’ve been in love with a memory for two years. I should be over Lennon by now, but I’m not. I never will be. I don’t want to be. Mum thinks I’m obstinate and that’s why I won’t move on.
Thing is, she’s right.
Tonight’s Likely Lad has a name, but I refuse to remember it. He’s all freckles and whiskers, and he carries a banjo. Nice touch. It’s not going to fetch me. He wants to sit in with us for our second set and Bridie can’t refuse with Christy sitting right there giving her that look. I refuse to dance accompanied by an unknown musician who’ll be looking up my skirt from behind. I pick up my ukulele and stand behind him, so he can’t see me without turning and being obvious.
While he tunes his banjo, I pipe up, “How about we start with ‘Unfortunate Lad’?”
Bridie shoots me a warning glance, but Kai smirks and says, “Yeah.”
Likely Lad looks over his shoulder. “Same tune as ‘Streets of Laredo’, right?”
I shrug as if to say, ‘everyone knows that,’ because everyone does and I’m so not impressed. He starts plucking out the opening melody and Bridie joins him on her violin. I strum my ukulele while Kai steps up to the microphone to sing.
As I was a-walking down by St. James’ Hospital,
I was a-walking down by there one day,