by Nikki Brown
“Yeah, nigga okay,” I said giving him the indication that I was gone sit back and not say shit, he knew that was bullshit better than anyone. He looked at me and shook his head as we crowded into the little ass space they gave us to visit her.
We waited about ten more minutes before we saw the door open behind the glass. My heart sank the minute I watched my sister walk through those doors. I couldn’t help the tear that rolled down my face. She tried to offer up a smile, but I wasn’t buying that shit. My fucking sister looked horrible.
Her normal caramel colored skin was dry and grey looking, her short hair was all over her head, and she looked like she hadn’t slept in days. Slowly making her way to where we were waiting for her, she was trying to keep from breaking down, but it was on the horizon. The dingy orange jumpsuit swallowed her small frame, I hated this shit. I hated the fact that I couldn’t do shit about it even more.
She sat down on the stool and grabbed the phone and Lucas did the same. I stood beside him and placed my hands on the glass. I never wanted to see my fucking sister like this, and it was tearing me the fuck up. She mirrored her hand to mine and lowered her head.
“Pick your head up Cherice; we’re Sharps we don’t bow to no fucking body.” Lucas barked, and she raised her head and stared at him before a faint smile spread across her face.
My dad used to tell us that when we were kids. Whenever we would get into trouble and lowered our heads, he would say when you lower your head you’re bowing to defeat, and a Sharp don’t bow to nothing or no one!
“I missed that,” she said. I could barely hear, but I could read her lips.
“How you holding up?” Lucas asked and then positioned the phone where we both could hear her.
“I’m okay, I’m sorry about all of this. I never meant for any of this to happen. I just…” she stopped and looked at us and then shook her head. “I signed over parental rights of Young to you Lucas, Sony yo crazy ass ain’t ready for no shit like that.” she chuckled nervously. “And don’t be teaching him how to be a playa either nigga.” She scolded me.
“Don’t fucking change the subject Cherice, what happened?” I said through gritted teeth.
“That doesn’t matter, just take care of my baby.” She said and let the tears roll down her face. “I hate that it’s been a year since I’ve seen you and this is how it had to happen. Just know that I love y’all and I’ve made some bad decisions in my life and one of those was turning my back on my family. I know that now, and I hate myself for it.”
“Cherice, let us help you.” Lucas begged and she shook her head.
“You are, by taking care of my baby and giving him the life I couldn’t.” she was talking in riddles, it was getting to me, I didn’t know what the fuck was going on and I hated not knowing.
“Talk to us sis, just talk to us.” I pleaded with her, but she stood up from the stool. “At least let us get you a lawyer, a good one.”
“I’m good, don’t worry about me. Just look out for Kam.” She looked back and forth between the two of us and disappeared behind the door that she came through.
We sat there for a minute just trying to figure out what the fuck just happened. We were leaving with the same answers that we had when we got here. I looked at Lucas, and he shook his head and finally returned the phone back to the jack and stood up.
On the way out the CO that was now eye fucking me handed me a piece of paper. I was about to throw that shit at her and tell her to get her teeth fixed but when I looked it was from Cherice, her signing her rights over to Lucas.
The walk to his truck was silent, both in our own thoughts. This shit was fucking with us, Cherice was being selfish as fuck for not letting us know what was going on. We were clueless and in the blind. I wished she would just let us help her, we could get her off.
“Shit’s all fucked up bruh,” Lucas said cranking up the Audi.
“Fuck yeah, ain’t shit we can do about it though.”
“She got our fucking hands tied. I gotta get her out of there though, she looked bad as hell.”
“I know that shit got to me I ain’t even gonna lie, a nigga shed a tear.”
“I’ma call my nigga anyway to see if he will take on her case, Ion care how much that shit cost we got to get her out of there.”
“Word!” was all I said and sat and let the sound of that new JayZ joint fill my ears. I needed to escape reality for a minute, it had me all fucked up.
We were heading to the warehouse, one of our traps got raided, and shit wasn’t adding up, so we needed to figure out if we had some snakes on our team. I knew the answer to the question, but I wanted to see that nigga face to face to see what he had to fucking say.
Pulling up to the warehouse where we held meetings and put in work, I loved coming here when I needed to think. My brother had it built like a workshop in the basement of it, that nigga was good with his hands that’s why they call his ass Kraft.
Lucas and Kraft were two different people, both hostile as fuck and deadly but Kraft had some extra shit with him. If he wasn’t my blood, I wouldn’t fuck with him. The nigga ain’t right at all. He never wanted to be called Kraft unless he was putting in work.
Walking into the warehouse, everyone was standing around trying to see what we called the meeting for. My eyes focused on the muthafucka who had been a natural fuck up from the minute we welcomed him into our team.
I looked to Lucas, and he looked to me, his eyes were dark and emotionless. I knew right then that Lucas was no longer present, Kraft was.
“So it has been brought to my attention that the Lasalle street trap has been short the last few months and then we were raided yesterday,” Kraft said making sure to look each of the men in the eyes. “Anybody care to explain.” It was more of a demand than a request, but these niggas was slow, so they started looking around trying to see who was going to speak first.
“Ion know what the fuck been going on when I do the first count the shit be straight.” The little nigga Javi said, he was fresh out of high school, but he been running for us for years and he was one of our loyal ones. “And that ain’t no snitch shit that’s all loyalty my nigga.”
I pounded my chest with my fist twice and nodded in his direction, and he followed suit. We looked ‘round waiting on someone else to speak, but they didn’t. I knew they wouldn’t. They should know by now we run our shit tight so we would know who did what.
“Pussy ass niggas,’ I walked around Kraft. “What? Y’all scared of this nigga?” I pointed at my brother. “That’s why y’all got the hush mouth? We already know what’s up, so you’ll be better off just telling us what the fuck is going on.”
I looked around, and Geech started fumbling around with his hands and shit, I looked him over, and he was fresh to fucking death. We already know what was up because his baby mama was a loud mouth hood-rat and told all his fucking business, the bitch she told was someone that I had been smashing for a minute. She told me everything, the same day the trap came up short for the third week in a row.
“So what’s good? I thought we were family around here?” I took a seat on top of the table.
“Look, man, my….my grandma she’s sick and I needed the money for her medical bills. Please don’t kill me I promise to pay all the money back.” You could hear the fear in his voice as he trembled with every word he said. He knew like we knew, either way, he wasn’t walking out of here alive, him stepping up just meant that we wouldn’t torture his ass.
“So if that was the case why not just ask us?”
“Sony man I don’t know, just give me a chance to make it right.” Kraft walked over and hit him so hard he hit the ground. Geech cried out in pain and a sinister smile spread across Kraft’s lips.
“Lore!” Kraft yelled out without turning towards the group. I already knew where this was going because Lore was the one to bring him in.
Lore just got out of jail about a year ago, he got hung up on a gun charge and had to do a year. He was
loyal as far as we knew, but Geech was his family, so we needed to look into that a little more. I watched him drop his head and make his way to the front of the room. The fear of the unknown was etched on his face, and it was hilarious to me.
The rules to bringing someone in the game were simple, you vouch for them, you’re responsible for them. He knew that which was why he was standing before us with a stupid look on his face.
“W—what’s up boss?” he stammered, and Kraft chuckled.
“Kill him.” were the only words that came out of his mouth. I looked from Lore to my brother and sat back in the chair that I now occupied. This was some crazy shit because that was that nigga’s family. I couldn’t imagine being told to kill my kin, but then again I wasn’t kin to anybody as disloyal as Geech.
“Come on boss, that’s fam! I can’t do no shit like that.” his voice was shaky, and there was a nervous energy around him that threw me off. We didn’t do weakness, and even though my brother was asking him to do some fucked up shit, he still needed to be a man about this shit.
“You brought him in, and you know the rules.” Evil grazed over Kraft’s eyes, and his normally lax demeanor was now rigid and cold. Death was on the horizon, Lore just had to decide if it was gonna be one or two people.
“I get that, and I take full responsibility for what he took. I’ll pay that shit back! I got you on that Kraft, but I can’t kill my blood.” He said straight up with a little more base than what he spoke before.
Kraft let out a throaty laugh, Lore took a step back and placed his hands in his pockets and waited to see what the next thing Kraft was gonna say.
“You think I give a fuck about some money nigga?” he asked and Lore shook his head. I looked down at Geech, and I could have sworn that nigga was praying, that shit wasn’t gone do him no good because the second he opened his mouth to say that it was him Kraft had already made it up in his mind to end him. “That nigga took what I spend on shoes in a month that shit didn’t hurt me, but it’s the principle of the matter.”
“I know but—” my brother put his hands up to stop him from speaking, I doubled over in laughter because this nigga looked like he was pissed that my brother was handling his ass like a G.
“No fucking buts, you got two fucking choices. You can either kill his ass and fall back in line and get this fucking money, or you can get the fuck out of my face and have to look over your shoulder wondering when I’m coming to take ya fucking life.” Kraft’s voice resonated through the small warehouse. “The choice is yours, either way, ya aunty buying that black dress.” He shrugged his shoulders like what he asked was an easy decision.
“Come on cuz you can’t do this shit.” Geech pleaded for his cousin to have mercy.
Without another work Lore pulled his gun from his waistband and pointed it at Geech’s head, “Forgive me, aunty.” He said before he pulled the trigger. A tear rolled down the right side of his face as he took in the bloody mess that was now covering the floor that surrounded us.
Lore couldn’t even look him in the face, he dropped his head and fell back in where he was before all of this went down. I didn’t have an ounce of pity for that nigga he did that to himself. Just because he was solid didn’t automatically mean that shit ran in his blood. Gotta be cautious in this business.
“In other fucking news, we doubling up on shit. Let me know now if y’all can handle that shit. If you can’t let us know.” I looked around the room. “Y’all know this nigga ain’t been down to his workshop in a minute, don’t give him a fucking reason to,” I warned. They knew what it meant to have to go down that bitch, he always made everyone watch when he did that shit. “So we good?”
Everybody nodded, and Kraft dismissed them, he normally wasn’t this cold, but he hated a thief more than he hated anything so the fact that someone stole from us took him there. Most of us knew that about him so this was the norm but those that didn’t, learned a lesson.
Taking in my brother’s appearance he seemed normal again and I shook my head. His eyes were normal and he wasn’t as tense as he was before.
“Yo you crazy as shit, why the hell you make that nigga do that.”
He chuckled, “I told that nigga when he introduced him that something was off and he wasn’t what he claimed to be but he said he was good, he vouched. The nigga fucked up and it was his job to clean that shit up.” He said like it wasn’t shit. “Yo Tink, have them clean this shit up and put his ass on the side of the road somewhere,” he told our fixer. “I mean I’m not a total asshole, I want the nigga to be able to bury his fam.” He shrugged and I shook my head again and we left so he could drop me off at my car.
Kelsi
“Congratulations Ms. McCray, you’re gonna be a mommy, you look to be about eight weeks.” The doctor announced and my heart dropped to my stomach and I lost all train of thought. I opened my mouth to say something but nothing came out. I looked Dr. Holmes in the face and allowed the tears that were bullying their way out of my eyes out. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to—”
“No,” I said barely above a whisper. “It’s not you, me and my boyfriend just broke up.”
“Oh wow, good thing at the wrong time huh?” I nodded my head and she gave me a sympathetic smile which I welcomed. “You have options.” She offered and I nodded. “Maybe you should have a conversation with him to let him know, maybe it will bring the two of you to common ground.”
“Maybe.” I wiped my face and smiled to let her know that I was okay.
She gave me the information that I would need to carry a successful pregnancy if I decided to keep the baby. I listened to what she was saying, but my mind was somewhere else. I checked out and set up my next appointment in which I had every intention on canceling.
Kids never really crossed my mind in my relationship with Lucas, Especially now since we were slightly estranged. I didn’t think he was serious when he told me to get out. He said that often but this time he was serious. I was not about to raise a baby by myself and I didn’t know for sure if I would be able to fix this shit with him or not. I actually missed him, his money more than his person but it’s all the same.
When I met Lucas in Atlanta, I knew he was a bad boy the minute I laid eyes on him. I knew what he was about, but I was down for the ride. He had money, and he wasn’t afraid to spend it, and I was attracted to that.
My mom and sister were just as excited about him as I was, especially when we got back home and found out he was actually from Charlotte which was just a few miles from where we rested in Harrisburg. My mom told me to sink my teeth into him and don’t let go until I had his last name.
Charlotte McCray made sure that we knew the only thing men were good for was a check. She used marriage like a game of chess, and she never once felt bad for that. A husband to her was a bank and dick on hand, her words not mine, and when those things were no longer there then it was time to bounce.
When our dad left her for that white woman, it did something to her that she wasn’t prepared for and she shielded herself and us from the thought of love. I hated that because at times I really wanted love, but I could never fully get that connection.
I actually tried with Lucas, he’s so damn fine and easy to love that I couldn’t help myself but I still felt like it was something missing. I couldn’t fully give myself to the relationship, and he knew it I could tell.
Some may ask, why did I stay but the answer was easy, the nigga was loaded. He had more money that he knew what to do with, and I was gone be right there to spend it. Plus, I didn’t want to hear Charlotte’s mouth. Even though she talked a lot of shit when it came to Lucas, she knew that he was a catch and she was attempting to train me how to keep him.
I would say that it was an epic fail, as of right now I was staying in my room at her house. She was waiting for me in the lobby of the doctor's office because her car was in the shop and we were going shopping after. Now I didn’t know if I was in the mood.
“So what did they say?”
she asked when we were in the car.
“I’m pregnant!”
“Kelsi, what do you plan on doing? You can’t raise a baby living with me and ain’t no other man gone want you while you are pregnant with another man’s baby. I taught you better than this Kels.” She scolded, and I couldn’t help the tears that cascaded down my face. My mother was a sucker for tears, just that quick she turned off the cold demeanor and addressed me again. “Don’t cry baby, we’ll figure it out.” She rubbed my back.
“What am I gone do with a baby, I don’t’ have time for this. He put me out of the house he won’t answer my calls please tell me what am I supposed to do. I can’t have this baby.” I stated firmly.
“Oh yes you can and you will, that’s how we are going to get you back in the house. You’ll be tied to his money through this baby.” The glimmer in my mother’s eyes was almost deranged. She was getting so much excitement from realizing that we could use a baby for monetary gain. “You will not get rid of this baby.”
“Lucas is not that kinda guy, he will not fall for something like that.” I shook my head. I knew how Lucas could get and playing with his emotions about a baby could definitely be detrimental to my life and I had a lot of shit I still wanted to do.
“Babies are a man’s weakness, trust me I know.” She smirked and sat back in her seat. “Just follow my lead, and everything will be okay. Let’s go find your baby’s daddy.”
Buckling my seatbelt, I knew that I should have put my foot down with this situation, but she was my mother. I couldn’t really say no to her, she kept me in a lot of situations that I didn’t really want to be in especially when it came to men, but it was just so hard to deny her, so I did things that I didn’t necessarily want to do.
Lucas’s new salon was the closest thing to us, so I decided to stop there first. When he first told me that he was looking into getting a salon I was pissed because I knew that he would be around a bunch of women. I wasn’t secure with my position in his life as of lately, so I threw a fit, so when he told me how much money would be coming in off it, I couldn’t help but be on board.