Eat My Schwartz

by Geoff Schwartz

  When he first got here it was a little weird between him and Brian Hoyer, because Brian obviously wanted to be the starter—as a guy who backed up Tom Brady for a few years and then bounced around, he had been working his whole life for this opportunity. And then, obviously, Johnny was drafted and became a threat to his position. It was a classic situation of Brian being the journeyman veteran, and Johnny being the young rookie who was not really sure how to fit into his role.

  So he was kind of introverted the first few months. He didn’t talk to many people.

  When Brian was named the starter during training camp, Johnny started to come out of his shell a little bit. I think they both had a sense of where they were and it wasn’t so awkward. I think that was good for both of them to have more clearly defined roles. Then Johnny got more comfortable and started talking and hanging out more.

  We all started to really like him. He’s a cool kid. He’s young, so he likes to have fun. You’d be hard-pressed to find people on the team that don’t enjoy his company.

  It’s funny: the Browns have Joe Thomas, who is so good, he’s going to be a first-ballot Hall of Famer. But in terms of star potential and fan adoration, Johnny is a whole other level. We are all water boys compared to that guy. The fans go nuts for him; they come to watch training camp and he is the main event. I’ll be signing a football for a kid and he’ll see Johnny 100 yards away and the kid will start screaming for Johnny while I’m right in front of him. It’s like I cease to exist! That’s pretty magnetic. They love him.

  And of course that love is understandable; he was exciting to watch in college with his shifty running style and ability to extend the plays, so it makes sense the fans are excited. But as a teammate, you need to support the players who are out there. That’s why it’s kind of strange to see fans have so much positive energy for the backup that they sometimes boo the starter.

  I have a lot of respect for Brian and Coach Pettine for coping with the situation, and for our 2015 starting QB, Josh McCown, who also had to endure a lot of media and fan scrutiny. And Johnny, deserves credit, too. He sure didn’t try to use his popularity to force anyone’s hand.

  As far as the drama of Johnny starting and what he brings to the game, I think the coaches were concerned with his discipline on the field. They want quarterbacks to stay within the framework of the play that’s called, at least as much as possible. If a play has three receivers in the progression, the QB has got to read each of them in sequence. If none of those guys are open then you can take off.

  But it’s not okay to just take a peek at the first option and then run and try to make something happen. The coaches wanted to make sure Johnny let it happen organically.

  And at beginning of his second season, he was making progress. You could tell Johnny really made it a priority to focus on football. He took better notes, asked more questions, and seemed more at ease around the building. He was also better in the huddle at calling plays and running them. He also seemed more in control of his personal life. There were some days during the season in his rookie year where I could tell he had partied pretty hard the night before, but I don’t really recall anything like that during year two. He seemed to have cleaned up his act.

  Towards the end of the year and after the season there were some reported incidents with his girlfriend that sounded very scary, like he had really lost control. Football is a harsh, physical sport at times, but violence towards women—or anybody, really—is not okay. Alcohol seems to have been involved in many of Johnny’s publicized problems, but that is no excuse. I sincerely hope Johnny can come to grips with his demons, because he is a talented athlete and a fun and engaging person.

  Geoff on JPP

  When I heard reports that Jason Pierre-Paul had severely damaged his hand in a 2015 Fourth of July fireworks accident, my heart sank. This was horrible news you never want to hear about anyone, never mind you star teammate. I don’t know the particulars regarding the accident, but I do remember thinking: damn, some things are just not worth the risk—at least not in the middle of your career.

  Yeah, I know, it’s easy to have 20-20 vision in hindsight. But fireworks, like motorcycles and really fast sports cars, are on my list of temptations to avoid.

  I hadn’t really worked with JPP very much, but I have admired and studied his game from afar, so I know he is a Pro Bowl–level player. He is a franchise star who can use his size, speed, and strength in ways that can be impossible to stop.

  So on a competitive level, I was really disappointed my teammate—one of the best pass rushers in the league—wasn’t on the roster.

  It was also just a frightening story about how fleeting life in the NFL can be.

  I mean, one minute he’s gearing up to sign a huge contract. The next minute, two of his fingers are mangled and he has no idea how he will function on the field or he has just blown a multimillion dollar payday.

  So I’m thrilled that he made it back to the team and got his contract status resolved. And I’m also glad he’ll continue to line up against the left side of the line during our scrimmages—away from me!

  Mitch on Head Injuries

  Of course I wonder about the cumulative effect of all the banging and hits on my body and my brain. I think every player does. It is an occupational risk. We all think about it, and we’ll discuss it when a story surfaces in the media, but we don’t really sit in a circle and share our anxieties. We know it’s a risk, but we also appreciate that the league is doing a much better job watching out for concussions and having guys pass their tests before they can go back out. But I can’t say I’m that worried about it, and I don’t think that many linemen are.

  The reason for that is linemen don’t have that many high-impact collisions. We battle at close quarters, so we don’t suffer like wide receivers or running backs who get creamed by head-hunting safeties. Or like a quarterback who gets his bell rung by a blitzing 250-pound linebacker.

  Also, if you have really good footwork ability and really good hand placement, you don’t need to throw your head into the mix. I try to use the rest of my body to do the work. Proper leverage and angles are a lot more effective than just launching myself at a guy headfirst. And even if we do crack helmets, since we are facing off in hand-to-hand combat, we generally have a split second to brace ourselves.

  To me the biggest threat of head trauma is probably getting kicked in the head when we are on the ground, or if we get mangled at the bottom of a pile.

  On a personal level—long before head trauma became such a big issue—I have never been into butting heads with my teammates in celebration. I totally support my teammates getting themselves psyched up before a game and storing up aggression, but some guys get so amped, they really knock heads. I’m not into that at all, and I let guys know. Or if I see a guy on a skull-knocking rampage, when he gets to me, I’ll just grab his head with my two hands and lightly tap it. I’ll high-five you, I’ll cheer, I’ll slap you on the back. But helmet knocking? If I have to get head-butted, I’d rather it happen in a game.

  Honestly, if the league is looking for ways to protect players, that should be on the list of things to restrict. Can you imagine a playful knock from a guy like Marshawn Lynch? Even if it’s a love tap, it’s a knock to your head. And some guys run into a huddle and tap heads with nine other guys in a row.

  Dudes, I am glad you are pumped up to play, but that can’t be good for you.

  Geoff on the Changing Game

  Maybe it’s part of a general culture shift driven by technological improvements, but whatever the reason, the NFL is getting smarter. The way we train is different, and the goals for our training are different.

  And by different, I mean smarter.

  For instance, when I first came to the NFL, teams were insistent on players being the certain weight. It’s like there was a magic chart that someone had devised that said if you play X position and are Y tall, then you need to weigh Z.

  Of course that is ridiculous. Pl
ayers who are exactly the same height and weight don’t all play alike. So what’s the point of that?

  There’s more technology and more data that is easier to obtain. Now it’s much more about body fat, body composure, how you play, how you look, how you recover. The precise weight, for most teams, isn’t that important, and it shouldn’t be.

  I also think that new, innovative position-specific training methods like the ones LeCharles uses at O-Line Performance are going to gain traction with some trainers. There’s still a lot of old-school methodology—at least for linemen—but I’ve had trainers ask me about things I’ve been doing with LeCharles. In the often conservative world of football, where it is not always easy to challenge accepted wisdom, this is a good sign. So I think teams are heading in a better, smarter direction when it comes to training and evaluating players.

  16

  DINNER WITH THE SCHWARTZES

  Geoff

  As it happens, the Jewish New Year often coincides with the start of the football season. This is sort of a mixed blessing for me. The start of the football season is the whole focus of my work life. It is, as you probably can tell by now, a great passion of mine.

  Growing up, however, the High Holy days of Rosh Hashanah (the Jewish New Year) and Yom Kippur (the Day of Atonement) were also major touchstones. My parents stayed home. There was no school for Mitch and me. We went to synagogue and heard the blowing of the shofar, the ram’s horn that the Torah instructs Jews to sound on these holy days. On Yom Kippur, we would fast and reflect on our lives and what we might have done wrong and how we might do better.

  So I always feel between a rock and a hard place when the holidays conflict with the games. But, as I’ve said earlier, my obligation to my career and family come first at this point in time.

  Fortunately, the two years I’ve been with the Giants, I’ve been lucky to have my parents fly in, a journey they make for four reasons:

  1.   They want to see Alex.

  2.   They want to be with family for the holiday.

  3.   They want to see me play.

  4.   They really, really want to see Alex.

  On Yom Kippur in 2015, I went to services at temple nearby with my mom and dad. I was thrilled that they were visiting. Seeing them is always reassuring and a vote of confidence. It was great having the support of the people who nurtured me and supported me. What a lucky thing to have in this world: a loving and supportive family.

  Fasting is never easy, but I’ve become a much more disciplined eater thanks to LeCharles, and so my fast on this day went well. Over the years I had told Meridith about the traditional break-fast meal: the idea is to have foods that are simple to prepare, so there’s little work involved. For many Jews the break-fast meal is a bagel-driven, brunch-like celebration. We’ve atoned. Now let’s eat!

  But this year, I didn’t really discuss things with her. She just said, “I’ll deal with it.”

  When we got home from temple, the table was filled with the most incredible spread. My non-Jewish wife had gone out and got the most Jewish meal possible. We were stunned.

  Smoked salmon, a full trout, whitefish, creamed herring, bagels, cream cheeses, onions, tomatoes, potato salad, coleslaw, dill pickles.

  “This is amazing, Meridith!” I said.

  “You’ve got every dish under the sun.” My mom laughed.

  “I guess my southern hospitality gene just kicked in while I was at the store. I’ve known Geoff long enough to figure it out.”

  “It’s perfect,” I said.

  Toward the end of a fast I usually feel great, like I’ve achieved something. I feel lighter, not physically, but mentally. I’ve endured, and I feel energized and clear. Now, I felt all that and more.

  We said the blessing of the bread and then began to load our plates, creating our perfect bagels, laden with cream cheese, assorted fish, and vegetables. I hadn’t seen a spread like this since that pre-wedding brunch at my parents’ house. That was barely a year and a half ago, and so much had happened in the interim. The wedding, signing a big contract with the Giants, the training, finding a new house, moving, the baby who was growing and changing every day and was now a toddler, learning the Giants’ system, plans for a TV show, and even my two infuriating freak injuries. If you asked me to dream up all these events two years ago, I wouldn’t have come close. I would have said, um, maybe I’ll be on a new team and Meridith and I will be married. End of story.

  “Wait,” my dad said as he was filling a glass with red wine. He lifted it up, said the blessing of the wine, which translates as “Blessed art Thou, Lord our God, King of the universe, Creator of the fruit of the vine.” And then he held his glass out, and gesturing to the table, he said, “To our wonderful son and daughter-in-law—”

  “And Mitch,” my ever-considerate mother added, “even though he’s not here.”

  “And to Alex, the greatest miracle of all … L’chaim.”

  To life.

  Words to live by, for everyone.

  POSTGAME DINING

  GRANDMA’S HANUKAH LATKES

  We make ’em on Hanukah, but they are delicious all year-round. Because most people have smaller appetites than we do, we’ve scaled down the requirements here. But this should make about 5 servings.

  5 potatoes

  1 onion

  2 eggs

  1 cup cooking oil

  Matzo meal (or saltines or flour)

  Salt

  Black Pepper

  Applesauce, for serving

  Powdered sugar, for serving

  Sour cream, for serving

  Sautéed onions, for serving

  1.   Preheat the oven to 200°F. Peel and grate the potatoes (if you want to use a blender or food processor we won’t tell). Place the shredded potatoes into a large bowl lined with paper towels. Squeeze out the excess water.

  2.   Transfer the “dried” potatoes back to the bowl.

  3.   Grate the onion and wrap in a paper towel. Squeeze out the water in the onion.

  4.   Add the onion to the potatoes; stir in the eggs, matzo meal, salt, and pepper.

  5.   Line a baking sheet or plate with paper towels and set aside.

  6.   In a skillet, heat ¼ cup of oil over medium-high heat. Then add about ½ cup of potato mixture into the skillet for each pancake.

  7.   Fry the pancake on both sides until golden brown, 4 to 6 minutes. Remove the pancakes from the skillet and place on the prepared baking sheet. Place in the oven while preparing the other pancakes.

  8.   Serve the pancakes hot with the condiments, applesauce or sugar for those with a sweet tooth, and sour cream and sautéed onions for those who like savory.

  LETTUCE WRAP CHICKEN FAJITAS

  We love corn-based Mexican wraps, tacos, and chips, but they are addictive carb-bombs. Here’s a much lower-carb alternative that brings flavor and crunch.

  Yields 3 servings

  1 Roma tomato

  1 large white onion

  1 bunch cilantro

  1 serrano pepper

  1 garlic clove

  Juice from one large lime

  Salt

  Black pepper

  2 medium avocados

  1 pound boneless skinless chicken breast

  1 packet fajita mix

  1 bell pepper of any color

  1 tablespoon of vegetable oil

  1 package Bibb or butter lettuce cups

  Shredded cheese, for serving

  Sour cream, for serving

  1.   To make the salsa: Chop up the tomato (discarding the seeds and pulp), a quarter of the onion, cilantro, lime juice, garlic, and serrano pepper (depending on desired heat). In a medium bowl, mix the salsa ingredients together and season heavily with salt, as tomatoes need more salt than you think, and with black pepper.

  2.   To make the guacamole: In a medium bowl, mash the avocados together with some of the salsa, the remaining lime juice, a
nd salt heavily, and add black pepper to taste.

  3.   Cut the chicken, the remaining onion, and the bell pepper into strips. In a large bowl, mix with the fajita seasoning.

  4.   Add oil to skillet and add the chicken. Cook over medium-high heat until golden brown, about 4-5 minutes. Remove the chicken from the skillet and set aside.

  5.   Add the onion and bell pepper. Cook for a few minutes until your desired consistency is achieved, shorter for crispier veggies and longer for softer.

  6.   Flatten the lettuce and place modest amounts of chicken, grilled veggies, salsa, guac, shredded cheese, and sour cream in the center of the lettuce leaf. Roll the lettuce up into a wrap. Remember, overstuffing the wrap will cause the lettuce to tear.

  MITCH’S PIZZA DOUGH

  This is my go-to pizza dough recipe. I first saw Wolfgang Puck make a pizza on TV when I was fourteen, and have experimented with dough-making ever since. It’s made me and a lot of my friends very happy. There’s nothing like making your own dough: mixing the ingredients, letting the mixture rise, kneading the dough, and feeling its texture change as you work it, letting it rise again, kneading it some more, and then rolling it out into a beautiful pizza wheel, ready for your choice of toppings. Magic!

  Yields 3 large crusts

  1 packet of active dry yeast

  1 teaspoon honey

  1 cup warm water

  3 cups all-purpose flour

  1 teaspoon kosher salt

  1 tablespoon extra-virgin olive oil, plus extra for brushing

  1.   In a small bowl, dissolve the yeast and honey in ¼ cup of warm water.

  2.   In a food processor, combine the flour and salt. Add the oil, the yeast mixture, and ¾ cup of warm water. Process until the batter forms a ball.