“I need you to text me Fen’s phone number. We need to coordinate how we’re going to dispose of—”
“He’s the commissioner, Will,” I said. “Even I know he can’t go missing. The cops need to find him.”
There was a lull in the conversation. The line between right and wrong was blurring, even for the good detective. The bodies were piling up, and we had to do something before we drowned in them.
“There’s something else we need to talk about,” I said. “There’s a drug on the streets called Venom. Have you heard of it?”
“That would be something the Narcotics Unit would handle. Why?”
“I met this kid vigilante who’s been trying to stop shipments of the drug. Supposedly, it’s not just hurting humans but supernaturals as well—to the point of death. I told him I’d look into it.”
“You did?”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
Will cleared his throat. “You’re not necessarily considered a good Samaritan, Raven.”
“I’m going to pretend I didn’t hear that.”
“Don’t take it the wrong way,” he quickly added. “You’re learning, you’re just not quite there yet.”
“Learning, eh?” I snorted. “No need to lessen the blow. I know what I am.”
“You are, Raven. I see it every time we talk. Slowly but surely, your humanity is starting to show.”
My humanity? What was Will smoking? I was anything but human, and I damn sure didn’t want to be.
“Look, I relayed the information, now go investigate and fix it.”
“Sure thing.” The detective chuckled. “What do you plan to do now?”
I shrugged as if he could see me. “I think it’s time for me to head out of Portland. I’m putting everyone’s lives at risk. I’m sending Charlie away for a few days until things cool down.”
“Forget the investigation. Aren’t you going to stay and find out what Odin wants?”
I should. I needed to figure it out or Hugin and Munin would follow and all of it would just happen again, regardless of where I went.
“You’re right.” I sighed. “I’ll call you back. I’m going to pack up and head to a motel. I want to clear out of Charlie’s apartment and will reach out to you again once I do.”
“A motel? I’m sure you have somewhere else you can go.”
“I can’t go back to my apartment, and I don’t want to attract any more attention to Charlie.”
The birds had already broken her window, and the humans had kidnapped her. She was a walking target. I needed the focus to be redirected to me. This reason alone was why I never got close to people. It was a weakness.
The line went silent before he said, “You can stay with me.”
I was playing with fire.
The right answer should have been “No, Will, I cannot stay with you.” Instead, I said sure. We didn’t like each other much, which made me think it’d be safe. I was sorely mistaken. Living with Will was going to cause a whole lot of trouble I didn’t need, but I also wasn’t doing anything to stop this train wreck from happening.
“I’ll sleep on the couch. You can take my bed,” Will offered.
I shook my head. “No, the couch is fine.”
“Just take the damn bed, Raven.”
The detective walked me into his one-bedroom apartment downtown. It was everything I thought it would be—it was very Will. A bicycle hung on a rack near the entrance. His living room housed a huge flat-screen TV and a leather sofa, with bookshelves lining the walls.
“Beer?” he offered as he opened his refrigerator.
I took a peek and that’s all that was in it—bottles of beer.
“Yeah,” I said, not one to ever turn down a drink. “Do you ever eat?”
He did a double-take until I nodded toward his fridge that was void of food.
“Ah, yeah, my bad. I don’t work a typical eight-to-five job, so going grocery shopping is pointless. Ninety-nine percent of the time I end up throwing it all away because it goes bad. If I recall, you’re lacking in that department too.”
“Observant as always.” I took the beer he offered. An uncomfortable silence filled the room, and for the first time since I could remember, I didn’t know what to say. I avoided his gaze—his stare was always so intense. We’d been alone many times before, but this felt different.
“I imagine you’re going to look for your father.”
With the commissioner gone, Charlie going away for a while, and The Boss out of the picture for now, there was nothing else standing in my way. There was nothing else I could do. I had to face the situation head-on. All the running around and looking for clues was for the humans. Fen was right. I’d buried my head in the sand long enough. I needed to find Odin.
“I am.”
“It seems dangerous looking for Odin.”
“Everything is dangerous,” I said. “If we don’t encounter our fears, we’ll live in a bubble of comfort for the rest of our lives, never experiencing or seeing what it truly means to live.”
“You’re not living it,” he replied, calling me out. “You spend your days drinking yourself into a stupor and popping pills like a corner junkie. What kind of life is that?”
“I’ve already lived many lifetimes.”
“My point exactly. You have the opportunity some people wish for: to enjoy life to the fullest. You can be whoever you want to be, do whatever you want to do.”
“I do what I want.”
“You hide from what you want,” he said with such confidence it threw me back a little.
“You don’t know shit about me. I’m tired and completely drained. At this point, I’m just waiting for the end. It’s all I can do.”
“You can be so much more.”
“No. Those are fantasies mortals create for themselves. That’s not reality.”
Will scratched his beard in frustration. I didn’t know what he expected from me, but I wasn’t sugarcoating anything. He was going to get it raw—straight with no chaser. And if that was a problem, I could go. Humans had this idea they would be whoever they wanted as long as they dreamed. It was idiotic and a complete lie they’d sold each other. It had nothing to do with my lack of humanity.
“It’s what’s in the soul,” he said.
“You know nothing about souls,” I chortled.
“And you do?”
I scoffed. “I am a valkyrie for gods’ sake. I take them for a living, I feel them in my grasps and I know who a person is just by looking. So don’t tell me anything about souls.”
His eyes narrowed, ready to contradict me. That’s all he ever did. We were always in an endless debate and never saw eye to eye. Maybe that was what attracted us to one another. At least that’s why I thought this all felt so uncomfortable. But he was human; I could never have anything serious with a mortal.
“Yes, you might be a valkyrie, but that doesn’t mean you know everything. You are just getting by. You still have a lot to learn.”
I laughed. Who was he to tell me—someone who had lived longer than what his history books had taught him—that I still had much to learn?
“You have quite the nerve.”
“And you are extremely close-minded,” he countered.
“If you want me to go, I’ll go.”
“I never said that.”
“Then what are we doing?”
“What do you mean?” he asked, and I wished I could take the words back. It’d rolled off the tongue so easily.
“Nothing.”
“It’s not nothing,” he said. “Say what you were going to say.”
“It’s pointless. I’m tired. We’ll talk in the morning.” Taking my beer and duffle bag to his bedroom, I decided he could take the couch. And that’s how it went. A valkyrie and a human. What were the odds?
At sunrise, I snuck out of Will’s apartment and went for a run. No drinking and no pills. I wasn’t doing it for the detective; I just wasn’t in the mood. In the mi
ddle of the night, I got the cold sweats and the jitters. I made it through the night, but I knew I wouldn’t be able to handle it all day. With a hoodie firmly in place and partially covering my face, I took out my running shoes and worked out muscles I hadn’t used in ages. I was out of shape and it was time I did something about it. When the time came, I’d have to confront Odin, and in the state I was in, I’d lose.
I gave out after five miles and was embarrassed that was all I could do. Collapsing on the nearest bench, I caught my breath, sucking in deep breaths as my lungs and throat burned.
Although I’d physically pushed myself to the limit, I was mentally preparing myself for what my next steps were. I knew what I had to do.
In front of me was one of those outdoor public book libraries where people donated books and took one in return. Hugin and Munin were sitting on top. They watched me intently, no longer hiding their existence.
“If he’s all big and mighty, why doesn’t he come to see me instead?” I yelled, not caring about the faces people made when they passed me. “Let’s not prolong this any further. Tell him to meet me tomorrow at noon. He’ll know where.”
Maybe I was being too ambitious and letting the adrenaline take over, but I couldn’t take it back now. I was going to put a stop to this, once and for all.
23
The remains were gone, but the aftermath was visible. Death surrounded the land and made it hard to breathe, even for me. Having guessed the location, I hadn’t been wrong. The air was heavy with his presence, and it made me tremble. I’d fought against many foes, but this was one I wasn’t sure I could beat.
The forest where Yggdrasil stood unprotected and uninhabited, seemed like the perfect fit for what was going to go down. It was the closest place we had to home on Midgard, and it only seemed fair it be the place where it would all end. Whether it was him or me, someone would die, and I hoped it wouldn’t be me. Secretly, I hoped it wouldn’t be him either. No matter what, I loved my father. That was the sickening part.
“I didn’t think you’d show,” I called out as I spun around in a circle in the middle of the opening. I saw Hugin and Munin and knew Odin had arrived. I could feel him. “I thought you’d continue hiding like the coward you are.”
“Big words for a child,” he said, his deep voice echoing in the forest. His voice was demanding, loud, and it made my bones quake.
“I’m no child.”
He stepped out of the shadows and was as I remembered. What once was blond hair was now white as snow. In brown rags, he strode toward me holding a staff taller than him with the arrowhead sharp, glinting in the sunlight. His beard was shorter than I remembered, landing just above his collarbone, and his eye patch covered his missing right eye.
“You could have fooled me, Hrefna. Prancing around Midgard, indulging in mortal debauchery that would put your sisters to shame. Have you no honor?”
Heat rose to my neck and face. I’d disgraced my people, that much I knew. He didn’t need to remind me. I was fully aware of the depravity I’d taken part in.
“Where were you?” I croaked. “When the realm to Valhalla was sealed, you did not come for me. I called out your name at night, cried myself to sleep while waiting for you, but you never came. You abandoned me!”
“You should have never stayed,” he whispered.
“I stayed for you! Because you love these stupid humans! I thought I was doing what you wanted.”
“Your job is not to think, but to follow orders.”
It was like a slap in the face. The man who’d once loved me now viewed me as a tool for his own use. He was my maker, not my father, and I couldn’t believe it had taken me this long to figure it out.
“Then we have a problem,” I said. “Because I no longer follow orders.”
I unsheathed my sword from my back, rotated my wrist, and lifted the sword beside me at eye level.
“Lay down your weapon, Hrefna. Let me end it peacefully.”
My heart pounded against my chest as though it would burst any second. “You would kill me? Your favorite daughter?” I scoffed.
“Kill one to save the many? Yes, I would.”
“What?” My arm wavered for a moment, but I held the sword strong. It thirsted for blood. “What do you mean?”
At that moment, one of the ravens landed on his shoulder and whispered in his ear.
“Ah, I see. You do not know of the prophecy.”
“A prophecy from the Norns?”
He laughed. “The Norns were useless, which is why I got rid of them,” he said flippantly. The witches had once told me a curse like no other would befall the one who killed them. Had they lied to me?
“What is this prophecy?” The hairs on my arms rose as the thumping of my heart increased.
His face turned grave. “You will stand by Fenrir’s side during Ragnarök. My favorite daughter will be the cause of my death.” He frowned as if it truly hurt him to say it. Maybe it did.
My arm fell to my side, and I almost lost my grip on the sword. It wasn’t possible. Was it? Would I really turn my back on everyone I’d ever loved, ever known, for the wolf? It didn’t sound plausible. It had to be a lie, a trick.
“It can’t be.” I shook my head. “That is not true.”
“Hugin and Munin have seen you, Hrefna. You have befriended my enemy, laid in bed with him. You’ve already betrayed me.”
My hands trembled. I did betray him, but I would never kill him. I had planned to do so today out of self-preservation. Now that I knew why he was after me, I could return home and beg for forgiveness.
“I would never, Father. In a moment of weakness and ignorance, I slept with Fenrir—”
“You knew who he was the second time. Do not lie to me, child.”
Remorse slowly turned into rage. My body straightened and fists tightened. “The valkyries taught me to seduce men for an advantage. I should not be punished for doing as I’ve been told.”
“Do you really believe that, Hrefna? You have no feelings for him whatsoever?” He tilted his head to the side.
“He is nothing.”
“I told you not to lie to me.” His voice boomed between the trees, making the soil beneath me quake. A small tremor shook the world and I steadied myself, ready for what was to come.
Odin struck the ground with his staff, sending the land rippling toward me until it knocked me off my feet. The power of his wrath was unmatched. He ran to me, twirling his staff before he struck my side with the wood. It hit me in the ribs and I keeled over. With the end, he smacked my face and tossed me against a tree.
I gripped the hilt of my sword and swung in his direction. He met it with his staff, the wood never chipping. I remembered when he’d acquired it. It’d been a gift—a weapon that could never be damaged. My only option was to get it out of his hand.
He blocked all my hits and I attempted to avoid his, but it wasn’t easy. The old man was fast, with a strength no other god could ever have.
“The Sword of Souls cannot save you,” he taunted. “Give it to me.”
“No,” I said, out of breath. “It’s mine.” I spun around and swung the sword, aiming for his side. He sidestepped me, the wood hitting me in my mid-back. I stumbled forward.
“You no longer deserve to wield such power.”
With renewed strength, I ran to him and jumped up in the air, my sword ready to strike him in the chest. Standing still, he palmed my chest, and I could see the waves of power he exuded as I flew backward. I struck my sword into the soil as I slid back, trying to slow myself down.
My breathing was rough and hard. I whipped my shoulder-length hair out of my face as I stood.
“I will not give up. You’ll have to kill me.”
“That is what I plan to do, my beautiful Hrefna.” He smiled.
A battle cry ripped out of me, making birds in the forest fly out of the trees. Slashing my sword through the air around him, I finally touched skin. My blade cut his cheek no more than five inches, bu
t I got him, which meant he had a weakness.
“You’re taking the future into your own hands!” I yelled. “The future is never set and always changing. You could be putting things into motion. Have you ever thought about that?”
“I have, but why wait to see if it will happen? Getting rid of the source secures the future for good.” He walked circles around me, spinning his staff.
“All you care about is yourself. Killing me will not save the masses, it’ll only save you.”
He grinned. “I am the masses.”
“The human murders? Why?”
“It was a warning.”
Odin was so fast, his staff hit my sides, face, and back. He beat me until I was face-up on the ground, waiting for the final blow. He stood above me, preparing to stab me in my heart with the arrowhead on his staff, but he was interrupted by his ravens when they landed on his shoulders. They whispered in his ear and his gaze slowly fell on me. Lowering his staff to his side, he stepped away. I frowned as he backed away, giving me an opportunity to get on my feet. His eyes scanned the forest, searching for something I couldn’t see.
“He cannot protect you forever, Hrefna,” Odin roared before he blended into the forest and disappeared, leaving me confused in the middle of the clearing.
I spun around and waited for his surprise attack. The pounding of feet raced toward me, and when it was loud enough, I turned in its direction. Crouched and with the sword in hand, I waited.
He burst out of the bushes, a snarl ripping out of him as he sniffed the area. Fenrir—in wolf form—stood before me growling and canines snapping.
I straightened once he realized there was no threat. His bones began to rearrange, and before I knew it, he’d transformed from animal to man. Standing naked, he strode toward me, his hand reaching for my face, giving it a small caress before releasing me.
“Are you hurt?”
I shook my head. Bruised? Yes. But by some miracle, I wasn’t dying. “What are you doing here? How did you know where I was?”
“I followed your scent. Charlie was gone, and I couldn’t find you. The human was worried, and rightfully so.”
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