by J. M. Dabney
“Come on, we have to get stuff for the new crew member and have to look at one more thing before we leave.”
“It was nice meeting you and you have a great kitten.”
“Thanks.” He muttered and ushered the girls along, throwing stuff in the cart as they went. He didn’t realize how much stuff a small puff of fur needed. They made it to a large glass case. He glanced at the kitten and saw her watching the rats scurry around the enclosure.
“Are we getting her a snack,” Juvie asked as she leaned against his right leg and Princess mirrored on the left side.
“No, we’re getting her a best friend.”
“You’re getting Priest a one-eyed, three-legged kitten with a rat for a best friend?”
“Yea, why?”
“You give the worst gifts,” Princess shook her head as she scratched the kittens folded down ears.
His girls were shitting on his plan.
“Shush it; my pretty bear will love them.”
“You keep saying that, Luck, but—” Juvie opened her arms motioning to the cat and rat.
“Don’t, I’m doing this.”
“Fine, but he’s going to say he loves it and then—”
“He’ll love it; I know it.”
“You can cuddle with us when you’re crying.”
He tracked down a salesperson, finished filling the cart with the items he needed for the rat, Juvie carried the cardboard box with holes with the kitten’s best friend. This was going to great, it had to be, he couldn’t keep fucking up this courting.
An hour later, after a lunch of Vegan food, the three of them arrived back home. These kids were weird, and it wasn’t all his fault, Psycho, one of the bouncers from Brawlers started all that. “Priest,” He called out for Priest, the girls close on his heels.
“Hey, they live.” Priest chuckled as he appeared from the kitchen.
“You’re not funny. It was a close one. They’ve been nightmares.”
“Couldn’t be that bad. Did you feed them?”
“Yes, we had cereal and juice boxes for breakfast while we watched cartoons, then we had vegan for lunch.”
“And you survived?”
“You're a smartass today, and I don’t fu—I don’t like it.”
“I’m sorry.”
“No, you’re not. Girls, we’re returning his presents.”
“Presents?”
“Don’t get too excited, Uncle Priest. It’s like the teddy bear again.”
“I loved my teddy bear.”
“See,” He looked down to glare at one girl then the other.
“What did you get me?”
He reached out and took Priest’s hand leading him towards the couch. “I know you always say no, but I wanted to do it.” Stepping behind Priest, he wrapped his arms around his waist. “You’ve gotta name them, though.”
“Oh, Lucky, I—”
“We should have gone with jewelry or dinner,” Juvie stage whispered.
“You don’t like them,” He dropped his forehead to Priest’s shoulder.
“They’re perfect,” Priest spun in his arms.
The thick arms tightening around him drove the oxygen from his lungs.
“They’re so weird, let’s go watch TV in Lucky’s room.”
“Don’t touch my stuff.”
“Not without germ stuff.”
“She hates me.”
“Juvie loves you. Can I take them out of their carrier?”
“They’re yours, do what you want. Um, the kitten isn’t really,” Lucky paused
“Isn’t what?”
“No one was taking her, all her litter mates got adopted, but she was left.”
“Why?”
“You’ll see.”
Priest released him and nearly jogged around the couch to drop to his knees next to the carrier. The kitten and rat both had their faces pressed to the door. “I can’t believe you got me a cat and a rat.”
“I like the dichotomy of it.”
“You would.”
He watched Priest release the latch and open the door. Priest reached in and removed the kitten first. He held his breath as he waited for a reaction.
“She’s beautiful,” Priest whispered as he nuzzled the kitten’s head.
“I know she’s missing a leg and an eye, but she didn’t deserve—”
“They’re perfect, Lucky.”
Priest’s face and eyes were lit up with a smile. The man had the kitten and rat tucked under his chin.
“She gets around pretty good. Hobbles a bit.”
“Born like this?”
“When they found the litter, she had a wound on her leg, and it couldn’t be saved, same with her eye.”
“We have so much to get.”
“Already taken care of, me and the girls went shopping after the animal shelter. I had to pick up the rat too. All you’ve got to do is pick names.”
“What should I name them?”
“That’s all on you, I picked them, you name them.”
“I gotta think about it.” Priest rose to his feet and approached him; the cute man had his new pets cuddled against his chest. “Thank you, Lucky.”
Soft lips had brushed his before Priest stepped back with his cheeks a bit red above his beard.
“You’re welcome.”
It was the first time Priest ever kissed him first. Usually it was him giving Priest just a quick peck to tease Priest and he always put plenty of space between them afterward so that Priest wouldn’t feel crowded. His parents were odd, but they loved each other unconditionally, always had, and part of him wanted what they had. Well, not exactly, he wasn’t sharing Priest—his bear was all his.
“Let’s get them settled in. Will they sleep with us?”
He felt his lips tug into a broad smile at the question. Priest slept with him every night for the past two weeks since they’d returned from the workshop.
“The kitten for sure, but the rats gonna have to stay in her cage.”
“Probably, don’t want to lose her somewhere in the house. Herc’s going to be so excited to have friends. I have to introduce them.” Priest took off calling Herc’s name.
He’d made his pretty bear happy, and it couldn’t get much fucking better than that.
8 THEIR FUR BABIES WERE AS WEIRD AS THEIR OTHER DADDY
Priest heard the doorbell ring. No one showed this early in the day. It was considered a capital offense. He peeked around the corner to catch sight of Lucky as he threw open the door and bestowed the unwelcome guests with the sign of the cross. “Be gone, evil ones,” He shouted as he tried to kick the door close but Lou rolled her eyes and kicked the door right back open.
“What the fuck is wrong with you,” Leigh-Lou demanded as she entered with Linus on her heels.
Lucky threw his hands up in defeat. “Please come in, we didn’t have anything better to do today.”
Priest couldn’t help laughing. The three Trenton siblings getting together could end two ways. One, they ultimately tortured an unsuspecting victim. The other option found them passed out from drinking to ignore each other. Either was always perversely amusing. Well, as long as he wasn’t the victim or there wasn’t puke.
“What did I do now, I haven’t even left the fucking house today.”
“Does the occasion call for alcohol or something stronger,” Priest asked as he stepped into the foyer.
“You’re not funny, Bear, get rid of them.”
“I’m not throwing your siblings out, play nice.” He rolled his eyes and disappeared, but the volume at which they spoke could be heard down the block.
He didn’t consider it eavesdropping when they weren’t exactly hiding their conversation. Looking towards Herc’s huge bed sat up in the corner of the kitchen he found the Mastiff curled up with his new friends, the kitten’s body tucked under his chin, and the rat was on top of his head. It was weird the three of them were rarely apart.
“So, what is it now?”
&nbs
p; “You gave the parents grandkids, granted they’re of the furry variety, but since it’s you they consider you getting pets with your man as a marriage proposal.” Lou’s tone disgusted.
Priest would’ve freaked if he didn’t know them so well. Lily wanted to marry all her kids off even if she despised the dates they brought home. Luckily Lily liked him even if he was just Lucky’s best friend.
“What the fuck, this is about Cyclops and Plague?”
“You named them Cyclops and Plague,” Linus asked as his voice rose a few octaves.
“Yea, Priest was going to name them something all cute and shit, I called veto.”
He groaned and opened the fridge; he wasn’t going to name them something cute, but he hadn’t had time to choose before Lucky picked the most inappropriate names. He grabbed three beers and carried them to the living room finding Lou laid out on the couch with her arm over her eyes with her feet in Linus’s lap.
“How you get that man to put up with you fucking amazes me?”
Lou’s opinion wasn’t new. She’d pulled him aside plenty of times to warn him to run hard and fast from Lucky. Sometimes he didn’t know if she was joking.
“He loves me.”
“Don’t start, Lucky,” He spent all his time admonishing his best friend for one thing or another.
“I swear he’s more warped than you.”
Lucky glared at Lou but snapped his teeth shut when Priest started to hand out bottles.
“The natives finished off the whiskey last night,” Priest informed them. He was still cleaning up the kitchen from the midnight experiment. He didn’t even want to know what they attempted to eat.
All he knew was he woke up with a softly snoring Lucky with his face hidden in the crook of Priest’s shoulder—a very naked Lucky. He’d seen Lucky naked plenty of times and his best friend had no shame in his body. Normally he avoided letting his eyes travel below Lucky’s chest, but a very perked up part of Lucky’s anatomy nudged his bare thigh insistently. He couldn’t analyze what went through his head, and he didn’t want to examine it too closely.
“Ma’s lined up suitable breeding stock, and we’re supposed to meet with the egg and sperm donors. I am not a womb for the cause; Linus can take one for the team.”
“She swears he’s adopted, so she’ll want you to grunt out a kid.”
“I’m not doing it, Lucky.”
Priest took a seat on the arm of Lucky’s seat and squeaked as he was pulled down onto the man’s lap.
“Don’t get all fucking cutesy couple bullshit with us. You’re off the fucking hook. You got a fucking man. I don’t want one. Can you imagine me putting up with some cock with legs long enough to get the egg dividing into some parasite that’ll feed off me for ten fucking months? Motherfucker, that’s like some alien shit, can’t they just grow them in vats and I can visit it until it’s ready to slime its way into this fucked up world. We’re dealing with overpopulation now.”
Priest snorted, no one could accuse Lou of being maternal. He still remembered the night she’d drunkenly poured herself out of the back of a cab after witnessing what she described as the horror of birth. She’d just kept repeating that it wasn’t done, put it back. Lou had slept on the cold tile of the bathroom floor that night. He didn’t think he’d handle it any better than her.
“It comes out with all this chunky slime, and they sometimes shit on their way out, they shit and piss, you’re essentially a bathroom. Who would do that to themselves?”
“Apparently not you, but I’m not reproducing.” Linus pointed at them and sneered.
That’s when Priest noticed Linus had all his jewelry in, the septum, brow and lip ring; he was worrying the hoop through his lip with his teeth. He could count on one hand the times he’d seen Linus with his piercings visible.
“It be easier for you, Linus, insert tab a into slot b until the baby juice flows, one of your little swimmers has to beat the others. Hell, maybe you’ll luck out and you’re sterile.”
“Uh uh, not happening, Lou, this one is all you. Besides have you looked at our family tree, can you imagine the limp mass of infant fuckedupedness one of us would create? It would be a total freak show. We’d have to search it for 666; it would be an Omen baby. Classical music would begin playing as it took its first breath and the angels would weep in fear and the Pope’s little hat would go up in flames.”
“Um, man, we’re atheists, remember?”
“If one of us produced the bearer of the Apocalypse we’d be believers.”
He just sat back listening to the quickly devolving conversation. Lucky loved Princess and Juvie, he was perfect with kids, but he knew Lucky never wanted any of his own, it seemed all the Trenton siblings held the sentiment.
“Just get some fur babies and Ma will be happy,” Lucky suggested.
Priest noticed the slow circles Lucky was drawing on his thigh. He relaxed his bulk back against Lucky’s chest, and Lucky moved onto rubbing his belly, pushing into the softness. Goosebumps started to work their way over his skin. This was so not fucking good, since the workshop his reactions to Lucky changed. He’d always been aware of Lucky, found him attractive, loved his affection, but he was starting to crave more. He didn’t think he’d ever be ready for sex, at least not penetration. Pain was all he’d experienced during sex.
He laced his fingers through Lucky’s as his past started to come back, the memories pushing at the blocks he kept in place except for when he slept. Lucky tightened his grip and nuzzled the side of his neck. Once more he felt safe, but how long before the memories came back?
“You know she won’t,” Lou shot to a sitting position and chugged most of her beer. “She’s on a fucking mission. We're supposed to fuck to give her little hippie shells to warp with her—”
“Our childhood was weird, but it wasn’t bad. It could’ve been so much fucking worse than being ostracized for the clothes we wore or our inability to tell a lie.”
“Parents normally want grandkids, Lily isn’t any different. She just has her own idea of how to get them.”
“We don’t wanna have kids,” Lou and Linus whined as they fell back having tantrums to make a toddler proud.
Priest needed to diffuse the coming meltdown, “Tell her that, but maybe say you’re just not ready, use the someday excuse.”
“Ma is an instant gratification type of crazy. She’s got grandkids on the brain, and she will not stop until she has them,” Lou said.
“Maybe have her spend more time with Princess and Juvie. They call her grandma, and she loves it.”
“Give her surrogate sycophants to worship at her bare, henna tattooed feet,” Linus asked.
“Exactly, and Princess and Juvie already love her. Maybe a grandma weekend would take some of the pressure off you.”
“Can we borrow the kids?”
“They’re not a cup of sugar, motherfuckers. Ya gotta be more subtle about it. You suddenly show up with mini-humans and she’s gonna smell a con.”
“Okay, I’m out of here, I’ve got a late appointment.”
“Want me to come with?”
“No, it’s fine, she’s a regular, but she travels a lot, so we had to make special arrangements.”
“Okay, but text me when ya get there and when you’re headed back.”
“Yes, dear.” He stood and Lucky’s hand connected with his ass. His eyes widened and he turned to look down at Lucky. “I know you didn’t just put your hand on me.”
“I always put my hands on you, and you love it.”
Lucky rubbed his hands over his ass, and he swatted them away. The three of them together made them even weirder which should be impossible.
“Oh, sweet fake baby Jesus, you two should just fuck and get it the fuck over with.” Linus groaned.
He shot a look at the other man and found him smiling—a real one. “Have you been pinching Lily’s stash?”
Lou snorted, “He has been acting weird. I was wondering if our family history of insani
ty had finally warped his brain.”
“I’m out,” Priest started to leave, but Lucky grabbed the front of his shirt to pull him down.
“Text me, or I’ll fucking worry, you know this.”
“Fine, I’ll text you, do you need proof of life pics?”
“Would you be naked?”
He felt his lips twitch and Lucky’s eyes lit up. He gave Lucky a quick kiss to the corner of his mouth before backing away to escape.
Lucky was fucking his head up, and he wasn’t quite sure how to deal with it or react. It wasn’t anything overt, Lucky’s treatment of him hadn’t changed. His best friend didn’t touch him any more than usual, they slept in the same bed, but that wasn’t rare even before their weekend.
It was more his reaction that changed. He’d pick it apart later, right now he needed to get to work. He grabbed his jacket from the hook by the back door, then headed for the front waving at the siblings as he went. Maybe he’d take a long ride after work to clear his head and figure out what the fuck was going on with him.
9 SOMETHING WAS WEIRD IN THE LAND OF TWIRLED
He squeezed his dreads in his left hand as he set the blow dryer aside and checked to make sure they were completely dry. After he had assured himself they were, he gathered the dense mass in his hands, leaving one loc loose, and twisted them atop his head securing them by tying them with the loose one. He used his hemp lotion on his arms and chest, then slipped on his Tibetan Prayer beads around his right wrist and the black faux leather cuff around his left.
Lucky looked in the mirror, but he wasn’t checking his appearance. He didn’t give a shit about stuff like that—comfort was his thing. As long as he was comfortable, then he was happy. No, he was tracking Priest’s movements.
He paid higher rent for the master bedroom because it had a private bathroom where Priest liked to take his baths. Priest was moving around what had turned into their room over the last month. He loved having Priest close, but the guys were starting to give him shit daily now. If they didn’t turn their bullshit onto Priest he could take it—he’d lived with Lily for twenty years, he could hold his own with them.