by T M Kelly
“Honestly, I think it was when I met Stephen. He has this aura I can’t pinpoint.” I grabbed a chip and dug it into the salsa. “Like, on one hand he seems delicious and makes me curious. Then on the other hand he reminds me of some of the slimeballs I dated.”
“Can I ask you an honest question?” Charlie said and quickly followed up with, “If it is too personal tell me.”
“Yeah, go for it,” I said and patted her hand. “You’ve seen me at my worst. What do I have to hide now?”
“Why lock yourself up in your room for five days?”
“That part is harder to answer. My body sometimes decides for me.”
“So, you want to know Stephen more, and yes I mean sexually?”
I paused for a beat. “I’m curious.”
“What if Stephen is an amazing guy? Maybe he just likes to share that crappy side that freaked you out to only outsiders.”
Before I said anymore, I let what she said work into my mind more. It was true; the man didn’t know me from Jane Doe. What if the way he talked to me was all an act? Maybe he struggled to trust outsiders. I could relate with that emotion.
I shook my head at my thoughts. “I feel dumb now.”
“Why? You are allowed to feel all your emotions.”
“I let my past speak for me. Decide how to feel.” I stood and walked over to the sink to fill my water glass. “I never gave Stephen a chance.” I held my hand up to continue. “In my defense, I really do think he expected we went to his house to fuck.”
“Well, maybe you need to have a long chat with Tyler first.” Charlie grabbed a few bowls and carried them over to the sink. “He was wrong to take you there that night.”
“Yeah, I won’t lie. It made me feel uncomfortable.”
“But still curious.”
“Yeah, that too.”
11
Zoe
After taco Friday with Charlie, I spent twenty-four hours trying to decide how to approach Tyler. Then instead of overthinking the situation, I hopped into my car and just made myself drive to his house. I forgot to check and see if he was actually at the gym. It was a split-second decision.
I pulled into the long driveway and parked my car behind his SUV. There was another SUV in the driveway. My split-second decision was failing. What if he had company?
Then my mind flew to Stephen. What if the company Tyler had was him? I spent twenty-fours thinking not only about Ty, but also about maybe getting to know the mystery man. Stephen had to be decent. I couldn’t imagine Tyler spending time with an asshole.
I had my foot still on the gas pedal with my head bent and my hand over the keys in the ignition. I was contemplating putting my car into reverse and going to the gym instead. Then I finally forced myself to look up and noticed two figures standing in a window upstairs.
Fuck. They both were here.
I became a chicken in a matter of seconds and immediately doubted my spur-of-the-moment trip. As I put the car in reverse, I saw a figure out of the corner of my eye running toward my car. “Zoe, wait,” Tyler yelled and placed his hand on the glass. It took all of my strength to look up into his piercing blue eyes. “Put it in park, Zoe. Stay.” He was begging, which I knew had to be hard for him.
My hand hesitated. I felt unsure what to do at the moment. I knew I felt curious about them both, and the opportunity presented to me. Finally, I stopped fighting my emotions and put the car into park.
Tyler tapped on the window. “Unlock the door, Zoe.”
There he was bossing me around…and I wanted more. “Why? I don’t even know why I’m here.”
“Let’s talk.”
“He’s here isn’t he?”
“Yeah, I can have him leave if you want?”
“No,” I quickly said, turning to face him. I lifted my hand without thinking and hit the unlock button.
Tyler opened the door and bent down beside me. “Fuck, I was so worried about you.”
“Why?” He had his hand on my thigh. The feeling was causing me to lose what little strength I had left.
“Zoe, look at me.” He lifted his hand and turned my face toward him. “When you left that night.” He paused for a moment. “I knew I fucked up.”
That statement took me by surprise. “Fucked up? I don’t understand.”
“Stephen is a player at heart. Somehow I managed to crack his outer walls, though.”
“That’s true,” a voice said from behind Tyler. It was Stephen walking our way. “I never planned to care about Tyler. It’s not who I am.” Stephen leaned against the car door and stared down at me.
“What changed your mind?” I said, feeling more curious by the minute.
“Have you spent more than twenty-four hours with this man?”
I had to think about my answer for a moment. No, I had only spent a few hours here and there with him. Even when we all went to Liverpool for the big AFC fight, I had spent minimal time with him. “No.”
“You won’t ask me that question once you do.” Stephen held his hand out. “Let’s talk.” I watched as Tyler leaned up and moved out of the way. “Clean slate.”
My body stayed rooted to the spot. I wasn’t afraid to move. It was more about the fear of feeling not just for one man, but two. What if all the walls cracked around us?
“What’s your poison?” Stephen asked and pulled a glass from the kitchen cabinet.
I finally broke and agreed to talk to them. Tyler was sitting next to me and wouldn’t leave my side. I sat on the barstool at the kitchen island, almost doubting my decision. Then Stephen set a glass down in front of me and held up a bottle of Crystal Head vodka.
“We have been milking this bottle all night. Want to join in?” I nodded and he poured a full glass. “A little dirty?” He pointed at the glass. “I mean the drink. You want some olives added?”
“Oh, no. Thank you.” Normally I would, but straight up sounded better at the moment. “I’m sorry I showed up unannounced.”
“I’m glad you did.” Tyler reached for my hand. “I didn’t know how to approach you. Then I decided to let you make that decision. I knew it was safer.”
I scowled at his choice of words. “Safer?”
“You left”—he paused before continuing—“and I knew you were pissed.”
“I wasn’t pissed.”
“You seemed like you were,” Stephen said and took a sip of the vodka.
“Confused.” I thought about my emotions and knew I was never pissed. “You assumed a lot that night.”
Stephen walked over and sat on the other side of me. “How so?”
“You thought we were at your house to fuck you. Tyler never even told me where I was going, so fucking you was never on my mind.” If this was going to get resolved I had to be honest.
Stephen smiled and something happened—my body reacted. “Tyler never told me he was stopping by. Maybe we both should be upset at him.”
I turned to face Tyler. “Maybe we should.”
Tyler stood up and walked over to the refrigerator. “Who’s hungry?”
“Way to change a subject.” I laughed and leaned my elbows on the counter. “You have any cheese? I have the urge to embarrass myself with something super cheesy.”
He lifted a block of brie and reached for a box of crackers. “I can warm this up. Would that satisfy your craving?”
I only nodded because I was finding it hard to talk. Stephen had moved closer to me, and his hand was resting on my thigh. Tyler must not have known Stephen had made a move because he continued to busy himself in the kitchen.
The conversation with Charlie was replaying in my mind. What if Stephen is an amazing guy? I realized at that moment he had to be, otherwise Tyler would never build such a strong relationship with this man. “What are you doing?” I said while working on my breathing.
“I don’t know,” Stephen admitted and moved his hand up a fraction of an inch.
His words caught me off guard. “You know.” I lightly laughed. Wit
hout a warning, he leaned forward and kissed me. His action surprised me and I leaned back. “See, I knew you did.”
“I was curious.”
“Oh.” So he was curious, too. “I feel confused again.”
He brushed a strand of hair away from face. “I’m sorry I created that. Tyler and I have had a lot of time to talk.”
“What did you both talk about?”
Tyler sat down behind me and moved his chair closer. “You,” he whispered in my ear.
Stephen followed suit and moved his chair closer. I thought about the dance floor at Noir and how it felt with them near me. My body deceived me and craved more. My voice felt uneven as I tried to speak. “I didn’t come here to have sex.” I had to take in a few deep breaths and let them out slowly. “Remember how I left for five days?”
“You don’t want to leave now, do you?” Stephen said and brushed his lips across mine. The contact sent a shockwave to my core.
“Damn it,” I said and jumped up. “You both know I want you.”
I noticed Stephen roll his eyes. “But.”
“You,” I yelled a little too loudly. “Your fucking attitude, and your fucking assumption I am a quick lay.” Without thinking I screamed at the top of my lungs, “Fuck you.” I needed to get out, get some air.
As I ran toward the front door, warm arms wrapped around my chest. I didn’t know who had a hold of me. My mind was not thinking at the moment. All I knew was the person needed to let go and quickly. I bent my body forward prepared to take the person down.
“Let her go, Stephen,” Tyler yelled from across the room. “You’re going to regret—”
Before Stephen could grasp the extent of the situation, I had him pinned down and was straddling him.
“Or, maybe not.”
I had Stephen’s hands above his head. “So,” I said and kept my face only six inches from his. “How do I crack through this wall of yours?”
“Have sex with me.” He shrugged and continued to try to free himself.
“You won’t have dinner and a movie first?” I was determined to prolong this game for as long as I could. He wasn’t going to make it easy, but he didn’t know whom he was dealing with yet. I was a fighter and I always got what I wanted.
12
Zoe
“Have you had their oysters?” I said and set the menu on the table.
“They’re delicious,” Tyler said and reached for my hand. “Should we order some?”
“They’re an aphrodisiac.” Stephen winked and took a sip of his champagne.
“I know.” I lifted my foot and slowly slid it up Stephen’s leg. He jumped at the contact and softly chuckled. “So we should get two orders.” Stephen reached for my foot and placed it on the chair in between his legs. “I’m feeling hungry.” I pushed my foot forward and felt his erection. I started to rub my foot slowly up and down.
Stephen leaned forward so only Tyler and I could hear. “I’m not afraid to take you to the bathroom and have my way with you if you keep this up.”
I felt my body react at his words. What was wrong with me? “So you both are bossy, eh?”
“Maybe,” Tyler said and I watched him lean forward. Then a second later, warm hands were sliding up my thigh. “Two can play at this game.” His fingers grazed the junction in between my thighs, forcing me to spread my legs.
“Tyler,” I whispered.
“Zoe,” I heard Stephen say from across the table. “Tyler. Don’t you dare stop.” His words were direct.
When I told Stephen at Tyler’s house to have dinner with me, he finally accepted. He gave one condition: I had to wear a dress. We talked for another two hours about why I thought that was a bit presumptuous. He tried to claim it was just a dress. I knew there was more to the request.
When we arrived at the restaurant, Stephen had me sit next to Tyler and across the table from him. Tyler had his arm wrapped around my waist and his hand sitting perfectly on my ass. I realized at that moment my five days of solitude was ridiculous. When I ran from Stephen’s place that night, I already knew what I wanted.
The waiter walked up. “Would you like to order an appetizer this evening?”
I sucked in a breath, unable to speak. Tyler had moved his fingers under my panties.
Stephen was currently helping me by unzipping his pants so I could have better access.
Tyler was the only one with a voice at the moment. “Yes, two orders of your oysters on a half-shell, please.” I softly yelped when I felt him pinch my clitoris. He winked. “You okay, baby?”
“Ye…ye…yes,” I stammered and sucked in a breath. I was still happy I demanded dinner and then sex. Then my foot felt the outline of Stephen’s cock, and I immediately regretted dinner. “Fuck,” I whispered.
“Do you need anything else, ma’am?” The waiter was looking at me this time.
“Bring me a double shot of Crystal Head vodka please.” The waiter nodded and disappeared. We were sitting at a table that was in the far corner of the restaurant. If someone really paid attention, they would figure out what was going on. Thankfully the place was almost empty.
“I want you sober tonight, Zoe.” Tyler had two fingers moving up and down my core.
“Oh, God.” I breathed and closed my eyes as I tried to take in every emotion happening all at once.
“Tell me again why we had to go to dinner?” Stephen continued to help me pleasure him with my foot.
“I’m not sure anymore,” I admitted. Tyler placed a finger inside me, causing my body to crave more. “Tyler, please,” I begged. He lightly laughed and moved my chair closer to him.
“Fuck, your face is so beautiful right now,” Stephen whispered.
I closed my eyes and shook my head. “We were supposed to get to know each other.”
“We are,” Ty said and slid a second finger inside. “Just in a different way.”
A little while later, I noticed the waiter walking our way with the oysters and attempted to remove my foot from Stephen’s pants. He grabbed a hold of me and didn’t let me move. I was struggling to make sense of the situation and finding I wanted more. As I looked between both men, I could see the desire in their eyes. This dinner was only the beginning.
“Here you are.” The server placed the platters in the center of the table. “Would you like to order your main entree?”
“Not tonight,” Tyler said and brought his hand out from under the table. I was shocked the moment he placed his index finger in his mouth. Without thinking, I grabbed his hand. If he did the same to his other finger, I would make them leave here and now.
“Yes, I think we just wanted to get an appetizer before the main show,” Stephen said and reached to grab an oyster.
“Oh, what show are you going to see?” The waiter leaned closer to me and refilled my glass.
“We haven’t decided yet. Ask Zoe,” Stephen teased and moved my foot in a perfect position where I could massage his balls.
“I…have…no idea,” I ground out.
“Here, try one.” Tyler lifted an oyster and placed it in front of my lips.
Finally, when the server walked away, I admitted, “Okay, I never planned for this. Please don’t make me regret it.” I was scared to give my heart, yet my body wanted to know more.
They both made me curious. Hungry. Needy.
What had I gotten myself into? Could I care about two men at the same time? It all seemed impossible. Then I glanced between them both and realized the fiction books had it all wrong.
“Where are we going now?” I said, looking up at Stephen. “Your place?” I was currently sandwiched in between Stephen and Tyler yet again as we made our way to Tyler’s SUV.
“You decide,” Stephen said and squeezed my behind. “This getting to know each other part was important for you.”
“It’s not to you?” His comment actually made me a little annoyed.
“Well, I have enjoyed our time playing.” He slid his hand down my ass and placed his finge
rs in between my thighs.
“There’s a ‘but’ coming,” I said while trying to keep my composure.
Stephen stopped and turned to face me. “No ‘but’ in this conversation.” He ran his fingers through my hair and cupped the back of my neck. “Zoe, I’m sorry for giving you a bad impression of me. I hope you understand why I acted how I did that night?”
His words took me off guard. I wasn’t prepared for what he said, but I needed it. “You mean that don’t you?” I placed my hand on his wrist needing the contact. From the corner of my eye, I noticed Tyler step closer. “I don’t know what happened. Fear. My past—”
“Is the past.” Stephen stepped closer. “I’m not those other men or women.”
He was right; he was my present. I left my past behind years ago. Instead of saying another word I tugged him closer. We were a breath apart. “Will you accept my apology for overreacting?”
The moment he smiled, my insides squirmed. “Only if you accept my apology for coming on too strong that night?”
Instead of voicing my thoughts, I cleared the distance and took what I craved. The moment his lips touched mine, I knew I was wrong that night. He was not those past assholes I ran away from years ago. Stephen wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me even closer. I could feel the outline of his erection and pushed against his body, loving how he felt. His kiss was deep and took me to a place I had never been before. Then Tyler’s body was behind me and I lost all sense of reality.
We pulled away at the same time. I felt out of breath. “I accept.”
He chuckled and leaned in for one more kiss. “Good. I accept, too.”
“Fuck”—Tyler breathed—“we need to get upset at each other on a regular basis.”
I burst out laughing and swatted at Tyler’s arm. “Um, hell to the no.” While still close to Stephen, I carefully turned my body and fisted my hand in Tyler’s shirt. “You should apologize too you know.” I tugged him forward. Stephen had his arms still wrapped around my body and his head resting on my shoulder. “Right, Stephen?”