by T M Kelly
He grabbed my hand and spun me toward him. “Just eat the shitty donut. You only live once, right?”
My body fell against his chest. “Well, hello there.” I giggled. He rubbed his hands up and down my backside. “Is this allowed right before a fight?”
“Oh, of course, it’s in the contract you signed.” I could feel his fingers circle around the waist band of my yoga pants. “It’s on the last page. Have sex to help provide stamina going into the fight.”
“Are you sure that’s what it says?” He slid my pants down over my hips. “I have a feeling this is just a ploy.” I reached in between us to unbutton and unzip his pants.
“I would never lie to you.” He leaned forward and captured my lips before lifting me up and placing me on the center of the table. “You trust me, right, Jenny?”
There was that word. It used to be a word I hated, and then I met this delicious fighter. I slid my hand under the waistband of his boxers and reached for him. My heart rate increased the moment my hand encircled around his perfect erection. “Yeah, I do.” I moved my bottom forward and helped guide him inside me. “I trust you with my life, Malik Carson.” We moved at a slow pace at first, but the excitement of the moment caused my body to increase the movements. “Thank you.” He had his hands on my hips to ensure each movement was perfect. As he started to grow harder inside me, I knew he was getting close. “Wait for me,” I begged.
“I’m trying,” he whispered beside my ear. “You feel so good.”
I reached my hand down and circled my index finger around my clitoris. “God, you feel amazing.” My body fell back slightly and I had to lift myself up on one elbow. The way I was positioned took us deeper. I could feel my body respond. “Malik.”
“Come with me, Jenny.”
I closed my eyes and let every movement take over my senses. If this could last a lifetime, I wanted it. Then the orgasm shot through my body, and I lifted up off the table and into his arms. “Malik. Fuck, Malik.” He yelled my name next to my ear, causing small aftershocks to surprise me as they coursed through my body. When I knew my body would let me rest finally, I fell back against the table. “We can never serve our friends a meal on this table.”
“Or we could.” He leaned over and placed his hands on either side of my head. “It could be our little secret.”
I covered my hands over my face. “Ew, no.” He pulled one of my hands off and bent to kiss my nose, my cheeks, and then my lips. I felt him push ever so slightly and I knew he was starting to get hard again. “That’s impossible,” I cried. “How?”
“I blame you.” He moved in and out at a slow pace.
“Fuck. I thought this was an after a fight tradition?”
“It will be a before and after fight tradition.”
“Ohhhh, changing the rules?”
He pulled out a few inches and then quickly pushed back inside me. “Do you object?”
I was finding it hard to think. “No.” That’s the only word that would escape from my lips. I was onboard with this new tradition. Hell, I was ready to create a million more with this man.
“Is this going to be hard to watch?” Anora looked around the locker room. “I mean, I can stay in here.”
I touched my hand to her arm. “Hey, you do what you feel is comfortable.” I kissed her cheek. “There will be blood and potentially a lot.”
She moaned. “No.” Then she shook her head. “I have to toughen up. We all know I’ve seen worse.”
“Does it bother you watching me get hit?”
She took in a deep breath and let it out slowly. “It’s that and I’m still processing MMA. Watching people strike each other for a living is weird to me.”
“You should give it another try.”
“I was a mess the first time. You want me to go at it again?” She was moving her head from side to side. “Nope, not gonna do it.”
“Well, if you want to be a chicken, then fine.” I flapped my arms out.
“Did you just call me a chicken?”
“Yup, I sure as shit did.”
She stepped closer to me. “You know you suck, right?”
Malik pulled a chair forward. “What am I missing?” He patted the chair for me to sit. “It’s time to tape up.”
“Anora hates being called a chicken.” I stood my ground and let her advance on me.
“And Jenny knows why.” She smiled and bumped her chest into mine.
“Uh oh, shit’s getting real in here,” Charlie yelled from the doorway. “Screw the fights in the octagon. I’m more interested in this matchup.”
Anora stepped away. “I could never hit my friend.”
“Well, I’m sure there are exceptions. Like when I mention the word chicken.” I sat down in front of Malik and held out my hand.
“Who pissed you off?” Malik said and started to wrap the tape around my knuckles.
“This bitch from grade school,” she said and sat on the floor beside me.
“From what I hear, the bitch hated redheads.” I was trying not to laugh.
“Seriously, didn’t she know messing with a redhead can be dangerous?” Charlie sat down beside Anora.
“Sounds like she missed that memo,” Malik said. I could see the smirk edging on the corners of his mouth.
The door to the locker room was opened a few inches. “Jenny, we need you out here in five minutes.” An assistant for Spartacus disappeared as quickly as she came.
“You ready?” Lily grabbed the door before the woman could close it and stepped inside. “It’s a mad house out there.”
I could hear Anora moaning. The sound made me smile. I planned to get her suited up to practice with me in the near future. I knew there was a warrior underneath that gentle exterior. I watched how she reacted to the word chicken, and lately I noticed how she flared up at the mention of Kac. There was a fighter inside her, too. She helped me see the real Jenny. It was my turn to return the favor.
First, she had to get used to watching the fights with her eyes open.
37
“Duck, duck,” Malik yelled from the sidelines. “You know how to avoid a hit like that.” This fight had three rounds of five minutes each. For the last two rounds, Malik had been barking cues and saying shit non-stop. It shouldn’t have bothered me but for some reason, it was starting to piss me off. “Drop your shoulder. Come on, you can move quicker than that.”
When the bell rang, I stormed over to the fence and pointed at him. “You need to stop.” His eyes went wide. “Do you know how it feels to have someone say the shit you have been saying while I’m trying to take her down?”
“Jenny, I’m just trying to help.”
“Are you? I’m not feeling it.” I turned my back on him and sat down on the little stool.
Charlie was my corner tonight. I expected her to bawl me out for yelling at Malik. “AJ is determined to take you down to the mat and fight.” I stayed silent and listened. “Don’t let her get the upper hand. You can take control down on the mat, too.”
“Okay,” I said and kept my eyes forward.
“She knows how you got here. Don’t let her try to take you down with the armbar,” Lily said and offered me some water. “So stop that shit before it begins.”
“I fucked up,” I whispered.
“Focus. You need to focus on the fight, Jenny.” Charlie was eye level with me. “Do you hear me?”
“Yeah, but I did fuck up.”
“You were abused. He didn’t know your triggers.”
I finally let myself look at Charlie. “I’m an asshole.”
“No. You’re human. He’s a big boy. He’ll be fine until the end of the fight.”
The bell rang. I needed to focus. “Tell him I’m sorry.”
“Tell him yourself after you win.”
I didn’t let myself glance in Malik’s direction. If I looked his way, I knew I would crumple. Spartacus brought me here to win fights, not get sappy about a man. I stepped forward and tapped AJ’s fist
then stepped back to wait for the referee to give the go-ahead.
I inhaled and moved forward. This fight wasn’t about Malik and me.
“Pay attention, Jenny,” Charlie said from the sideline. “You know what you have to do.”
I circled around the octagon with AJ until I grew bored. She wasn’t making a move toward me. Instead, she just continued to bounce back and forth. This felt odd. The first two rounds she was on fire and I was fighting to survive. Now I felt like she was giving up. What changed?
“Did you forget how to fight in the last five minutes?”
She rolled her eyes. “You wish.”
I spun my body around and threw the perfect high kick against the side of her face. Charlie had spent the last two weeks helping me understand Muay Thai and how to land the perfect high kick. With how my opponent seemed to be slowing down, I decided to practice the skills I had been taught. I wasn’t prepared for how quickly it took AJ down to the mat, though. She was lying face down and not moving.
“Is she okay?” I dropped down beside her and placed my hand on her back. “AJ.”
“Stand back,” the referee instructed.
Then the doctor appeared and was knelt over, flashing a pen light into her eyes.
“Just tell me if she’s okay.” I threw my gloved hands to my face. If that kick killed her, I don’t know what I would do.
“There’s movement,” I heard the doctor say. “She just took a quick nap.”
I bent down on the other side of AJ. “Please tell me you’re okay.” She grabbed my hand and touched it to her forehead. Her gesture calmed me finally. “Oh fuck me, thank you God.”
She pulled me down close to her mouth. “That was one hell of a kick,” she whispered.
“Fuck, I didn’t know the impact it would cause.” I held her hand close to my chest.
“Go celebrate.” She winked.
I stood and started to turn around, but I had to take one more look at AJ. I had caused that to happen. The way I felt inside from that takedown, I was doubting my ability to be a fighter.
“Holy shit, you did it,” Charlie yelled from behind me and picked my body up to spin me around. “Like, that was so damn perfect, Jenny.”
“Where’s Malik?” I was distracted. He should be here right now. My opponent was badly injured and my boyfriend had disappeared. This is not at all how I wanted to celebrate a win. “I need to find Malik.”
“Let’s get you back to the locker room.” Charlie helped me put a T-shirt on. “He’s there.”
“Are you sure he didn’t leave?”
“I know he didn’t.” We were in the hallway away from the crowd. She grabbed my hand and stopped me from continuing to walk. “He’s not Ray, Jenny. Malik’s different. He wants to see you win, not lose.”
“Fuck.” I punched the wall and threw my back against the cool concrete. “I know that.” I slid down the wall and rested my forearms on my knees. “Do you think he’ll give me a second chance?”
“I would give you a million.” I jumped up at the sound of his voice.
“I’m sorry.” I stepped forward. “I don’t know what came over me.”
“Memories. I get it.” He grabbed each hand and removed my gloves. “We’re still figuring this all out.”
I placed my hands on his chest. “You’re a good man. I know better.”
“Stop.” He wrapped his arms around my waist. “Don’t apologize for your past, Jenny. You never have to feel bad for your emotions.”
“Someday I’ll need to stop blaming my past.”
“Someday. Not today, though.”
“How did I get so lucky?” I rested my forehead on his chest and closed my eyes. “I love you, Malik Carson.”
He placed his hands on my biceps and pulled me back slightly. “What did you just say?”
“I love you.” Three words I had not voiced in a very long time. “I thought my story was over. That a happy ending would never happen.”
“Turns out it’s only just begun. I think you have more to tell.”
“But with you?”
“Always.” He tucked a strand of hair behind my ear and circled his fingers behind my neck. “I love you so much, Jenny Andrews.”
It was hard not thinking about him. I planned to make his name a word that would never be spoken. My dead husband thought he stripped me of my happiness. Instead he lit a fire inside my soul that was not ready to give up. I would survive.
Epilogue
Six months later…
“Wait, really?” Anora grabbed my hand and stopped me from sitting down. “Is that possible?”
I looked down at her hand and back up. “So they say.” I crossed my fingers. “I need to make an appointment to see a doctor who specializes in the procedure.”
“It’s been close to a year since you met Malik. You sure that’s enough time?”
“I’m just thinking about having a baby.”
“Ray just did some pretty—”
“I thought I said not to say his name.”
Anora opened her menu. “Sorry, ‘he who shall not be spoken’ did some pretty awful things to you several months ago.”
“And the man I fell in love with saved me from all that.” I leaned back in my chair and grabbed the menu. “Why are we fighting over this?”
“Because I’m being overprotective.”
I loved when Anora was honest. “Well stop it.”
Before I could say another word, the server walked up. “Hello, ladies. Can I get you something to drink?”
“Water,” Anora said and brushed her hands through her hair. “Can you bring some chips and salsa, too, please?”
“Water for me.” I waited until the waiter was far enough away. “Malik brought it up several months ago.”
“Okay, now you have to explain.”
“He said it’s possible to reverse the surgery when you have your tubes tied. That’s it.” I rested my arms on the table. “So I was curious. The research online shows it’s a straight forward surgery, but there are still some unknowns. Since I’m under forty, I have a stronger chance it’ll work.”
“Holy cats,” she said and clapped her hands together.
“I know.” I reached for her hand. “It’s weird talking about this, but lately it’s all I can think about.”
“Maybe that’s a sign?”
“Maybe.” I grabbed my water. “The other night we were sitting on the patio. I made him sit in the chair opposite me.”
“We’re not discussing some kinky sex position, right?”
I leaned over and swatted at her arm. “No, it’s not a kinky sex position.” Her words made me laugh. “It’s always about sex with you.”
“When you’ve gone this long without any, it’s all you can think about.”
“Do we need to fix that?”
“I’m fine.” She was too quick to answer. I could tell by her facial expression something was wrong. “Finish your story.”
“But—”
“Stop. I don’t want to talk about him.” She grabbed a chip and dipped it into the salsa. “Now, will you finish your damn story?”
“Fine.” I shook my head and thought about the other night. “I just bought new pencils, so I tested them out by drawing Malik.”
“Oh, Jenny.”
“It’s the first time I let myself draw in front of anyone in a very long time.”
“How did it feel?”
“Amazing.” I grabbed a chip and popped it into my mouth. “If this is how life is supposed to be, I don’t want to ever give it up.”
“Malik better watch out. Next you’ll be telling him you want five kids and a large studio to draw.”
I thought about her words. That didn’t sound like a bad plan. Well, except I was too old to have five kids. I would settle for two. That would be more than enough.
“Don’t tell me you’re considering five kids?”
“What? Hell no.” I burst out laughing. “Just the thought of havin
g kids makes me excited. Then I think about Malik being a father and I get emotional.”
After about thirty minutes of discussing kids and enjoying lunch on the patio. We finally peeled ourselves away from the restaurant. Anora grabbed my hand. “Malik would make an awesome dad.” She looked around. “Hey, you need to follow me back home. I want to show you what I did with those two end tables I bought at the antique store we love.” I looked at my watch. Charlie and I were set to spar in about two hours. “Oh, please, you can spare a few minutes of your time to see how the refurbish went.”
“Fine. I’ll follow you there.”
When we arrived at her place I parked on the street. She always parked in her driveway. Normally when I followed her home, she would walk down the driveway and meet me at the sidewalk that led up to the front door. This time I stood there waiting for almost two minutes. “Anora? Are you okay?” I said and walked up the driveway. Her car door was open and her purse was on the ground. Instead of saying her name out loud again, I grabbed my phone and sent a text to Malik. Something’s wrong. Come over to Anora’s ASAP.
I heard a crash that came from inside the house. It was a split-second decision but going in alone won. I left my purse on the sidewalk and stuffed my phone inside my back pocket. The back door was ajar, which made me question my decision. Right as I entered the kitchen, I noticed blood drops on the floor. Fear started to set in with each step I took. If anything happened to Anora—
“Jenny.” Anora walked out into the kitchen. “Sorry, I had to pee so bad.”
I could tell she was shaking and there was blood on her hands. “Yeah, why am I not believing you?”
“That I had to go potty?”
“Pretty much.” I pushed past her and followed the small droplets of blood all the way to her bedroom. “How did you cut yourself and then go to the bathroom?” I pointed to the blood trail. “This doesn’t add up. So either you start talking or I open that door myself.” I pointed to her closed bedroom door.
“You’re not my mother.”
“You never act this way with me. What’s going on?”