by Katy Kaylee
I took a few deep breaths, and stared at him.
A hint of a smile formed on his lips, the corners of his mouth curling upwards and the cleft in his chin deepening slightly, but he didn't say a word, or move an inch.
What the hell was he waiting for?
I heard footsteps behind me and I whirled around just in time to see her standing in the hallway, holding a black gift bag. My eyes widened slightly and as I opened my mouth to say something, she chuckled.
“That was quite a speech,” the young woman said.
I stood frozen on the spot as the reality of the situation sunk in. This woman, tall, with flowing red hair, a perfect face, and an even more perfect body, intimidated me to no end, and I felt helpless. I turned to Zac, but he had a blank expression on his face.
“I’m Teagan,” the woman said and held out her hand to me. “You must be Olivia, Alice’s little friend.”
Her condescending tone made my blood boil in my chest and my chest tightened. Teagan, as in Zac’s ex-girlfriend.
So he was back together with her again? How the hell could he do that after what he told about her?
I frowned at him and felt hot tears sting my eyes.
“Liv, it’s not what you think,” Zac said carefully.
“Yeah, because everything you’ve told me so far has been the absolute truth, right?” I exclaimed and stormed passed him.
“Liv, wait, please,” he said, grabbing my arm, but I pulled out of his grasp before he could get a hold of me.
I stormed out of the apartment and towards the elevator. The elevator doors opened and I stepped inside. Just as they were about to close, Zac pushed through the gap and stepped into the elevator.
“What the hell are you doing?” I shrieked.
“Would you please just listen to me?”
“You’re back together with your ex again? I thought she was the most horrible person in the world, or at least that was what you told me,” I spat at him, turning away, but the mirror against the inside walls of the elevator made it difficult to isolate myself from him, or ignore him.
“Liv, would you just listen to me?” he pleaded. “It’s really not what you think.”
I reluctantly turned to him and crossed my arms.
“You look beautiful, by the way,” he said to me.
“Are you trying to butter me up right now?” I asked, narrowing my eyes suspiciously at him.
The truth of the matter was that I had missed him with the entirety of my soul, and seeing him with his ex-girlfriend had not made those feelings any less. That only proved this painful point that I loved him no matter what he did.
“Is it working?” he asked.
“No, you embarrassed me.”
“I embarrassed you? I didn't ask you to show up at my door unannounced,” he defended.
“Right. I’m the one who’s wrong in this whole situation.”
“Don’t do that.”
“Do what?” I asked and crossed my arms.
“Act like a victim, because you’re not,” he said to me. “You’re so much better than that.”
“So you say, but then the moment things get rough, you run back to her.”
“I didn't run back to her, Liv. All the things I said about her were true, and still is. She’s not someone who I want in my life, and she knows that,” he answered.
“Then what was she doing in your apartment?” I asked.
Right at the moment, the elevator doors opened and Teagan stood in the hallway. I glanced at the electronic panel and noticed that we were back on Zac’s floor.
“I think there has been a little miscommunication,” Teagan said. “Why don’t we all go back to Zac’s apartment and we can talk?”
I glanced at her apprehensively and pouted. I felt too intimidated by this beautiful woman, but luckily I knew that she was only pretty on the outside. “Fine,” I muttered and stepped out of the elevator.
I followed Teagan back to Zac’s apartment without saying another word, but Teagan turned to me and said, “By the way I love your dress. You look totally hot.”
Zac
Zac
I grinned slightly when I heard Teagan’s comment, and I hoped that Liv realized that she did indeed look gorgeous. I imagined she rolled her eyes so hard at tat comment, but she was way to polite to say anything bitchy or snippy in return.
The three of us entered my apartment, and never in my wildest dreams, or nightmares for that matter would I have imagined that I would be in a room with both Liv and Teagan. I shivered slightly as I sat down on the armrest of the couch Liv and I had sex on and pursed my lips to suppress a sly smile.
“Okay, so clearly there is a bit of confusion as to what I am doing here, right?” Teagan asked and I raised my eyebrows at her. She fobbed me off with her usual cold and dismissive expression and she turned to Liv. “Right, Olivia?”
“It’s Liv,” Liv said, and I was surprised that she wasn't going down without a fight.
“Like the actress?” Teagan asked with a frown, flicking her copper hair over her shoulder.
“Just get to the point, Teagan,” I muttered.
“Okay, okay,” she said and rolled her eyes and turned to Liv. “I’m moving to Europe and it turned out that Zac still has all the memory cards I gave him when we were together, you know with all our pictures on it. That’s the only reason I came here, for the memory cards. Zac and I are so over.”
Liv glanced at me and I nodded. “It’s true, I swear.”
“Besides, the whole time I’ve been here, he was checking his phone, which I am guessing was because you two had a fight or something. Zac has a certain way about him when he feels like he fucked up big time,” Teagan pointed out.
“I’m surprised you even noticed that,” I muttered.
Teagan scowled at me and turned away. “Anyway, I am sorry that this whole thing upset you, with me being here and whatever. I’m just here for my memory cards.”
“Okay,” Liv said and shrugged her shoulders. “Then you better take them and get going.”
My jaw dropped at Liv’s bitchy comment, but I was proud of her for taking control of the situation. She wasn't the insecure, and terrified little girl anymore. She was a strong, and assertive young woman who didn't take shit from anyone, especially not a spoiled brat of a woman like Teagan.
Teagan pursed her lips, picked up the black gift bag. which stood on the kitchen counter and walked passed me.
“I like her, she’s perfect for you, Zacky,” Teagan said and left the apartment.
The door slammed behind me and I turned to Liv. She glanced at me, biting her lower lip and sighed.
I simply stared at her, seeing her looking so beautiful. It wasn't only the dress that made her that way, but the beauty and strength which shone through from inside her.
Despite the embarrassed look on her face, she was the most beautiful woman in the world to me, or maybe it was because of the embarrassed expression on her face. Regardless, she was here, and she loved me.
“I feel like a complete idiot,” she muttered.
“Why? You stood up for yourself, and you sent her on her way,” I said.
“Yeah, but I suspected you of something horrible and it wasn't even true. What kind of a person does something like that?”
“A strong woman who knows what she wants and would do anything to get it.”
She glanced at me and shook her head, not saying a word.
“Did you mean what you said to me? That you love me?”
“I meant every word,” she whispered. “But if you don’t feel the same way about me, I understand. I just wanted you to know how I felt, because I was always so afraid to tell you and I figured if I told you right now, then I wouldn't be able to back down. Again.”
“Liv-”
“I know that we made an arrangement that it would be no-strings attached and all that, but it wasn't ever a one time thing, at least not for me. I tried to convince myself that I couldn't and should
n't be feeling all those things for you. Alice would kill me and never talk to me again,” she said and took a deep breath, “but I realized that it didn't matter what Alice thought of us, or me being in love with you, because for once it wasn't about her. It was about you and me.”
A smile formed on my lips, but I didn't say anything. I just waited for her to finish, because once I got started on everything I wanted to say to her, there would be no stopping me.
“I went on a date with a nice guy called Tom tonight, and he was nice and funny and really good looking. I felt comfortable talking to him, and everything went fine. Then I told him the story of how Alice and I stole your dad’s car and took it for a ride.”
“Alice drove it into a concrete wall and sent you to find me.”
“That’s not exactly true,” she cringed.
I frowned and glanced at her. “What do you mean?”
“She didn't tell me to find you. She told me to go find help. You were the first person I thought of. You were the only person I knew who would help us, no matter what,” Liv said.
I felt my heart warm up in my chest and I smiled at her. “I never knew that.”
“I know, and I never told you that either. I should have told you, about that, and everything else so long ago, Zac. I just couldn't bare the thought of you not wanting to be with me.”
I nodded and slowly approached her.
“So, what I was trying to say to you, is that I love you so incredibly and intensely, and I have for nearly fifteen years,” she said without hesitation, without faltering, and without fear.
I had the greatest admiration for her in that moment, and a smile formed on my lips.
“Liv, you have no idea what those words mean to me. It feels as though I waited a lifetime for you to say those words.”
“Why do I feel that there is a big giant ‘but’ in there somewhere?” she asked.
I sighed and pouted slightly. “There’s not, I promise. My entire life, I never felt as though I belonged either. I spent most days hanging around people who only pretended to be my friends. They never knew me, but I guess that was the point of high school, and being one of the popular kids. No-one really took the time to get to know me. They were just interested in being associated with people who seemed more important and influential than others.”
“High school sucked.”
“It did,” I said, ignoring her apprehensive expression which appeared on her beautiful face. “So after...”
A lump appeared in my throat, but I managed to swallow it down before it got the better of me and I cleared my throat. “So after my mom died, I felt more alone than ever, and my so-called friends didn't understand what I was going through. They tried to understand, but they didn't take the time to do so.”
“So you rebelled.”
“It was the only way I was getting any attention, or validation.”
“I can understand that, especially with everything that was going on at him.”
“You know me too well, Liv, and that’s what I love about you. You understand me, better than I know myself. Trust me when I say that I have never had anyone care about me the way you care about me, even though I was an asshole who sped around the neighborhood with a bunch of outcasts,” I said and took her hand. “You are the best thing that has ever happened to me, Liv.”
A smile formed on her lips and somehow I recognized that expression. I had seen it so many times before, but I never paid enough attention to see it.
Now, I knew.
“I have a bit of a confession to make as well.”
She chuckled and cocked her head. “Let’s hear it then.”
“I’ve had a bit of a crush on you too, when I was younger. I think I was seventeen, or something like that, and I remember the moment I realized it for the first time,” I said and her eyes sparkled with intrigue. “You and Alice were at the lake, we all were, but you two were on your own, laughing and being your usual weird selves. You wore a bright blue bikini, and I remembered that I couldn't stop looking at you. One of my friends even made a joke about me being too old for you, and that I’d be a cradle-snatcher, which was really offensive now that I think about. I hid my feelings for you, because partly I thought I was too cool to be hanging around my little sister and her friend.”
“Partly?” she asked.
“And I was terrified that you’d shoot me down.”
“I was thirteen. I probably would have,” she said with a wink.
“That was a good call on my part then,” I sighed in relief and place my hand on my hips.
“Why didn’t you ever tell me?” she asked.
“A bunch of reasons. A list too long to name.”
“Well, I have loads of time. I just walked out on a date, so I’m guessing I won’t be going out again for a while.”
“Not unless it’s with me,” I said with a smirk.
She smiled and mimicked my pose by placing her hands on her hips as well, but she looked much hotter than I did.
“So tell me those reasons,” she said, still holding her pose.
“Mainly because of Alice telling me to stay away from you,” I answered and she held up one finger. “And I wasn't the best guy in the world.”
Liv raised another finger and I frowned at her. “Are you seriously counting them?”
“You’re the one who said there was a long list.”
“God, you’re such a smartass,” I muttered and rolled my eyes as she giggled in amusement.
“Go on.”
“Seriously, Liv? You want me to go through every single reason, right now?” I asked exasperatedly.
“I think that it’s time I heard them,” she said and crossed her arms. “After all this time, you know.”
I sighed and shook my head at her, but I knew she was right. I also knew exactly what she was trying to do. She wanted me to get my feelings out in the open. She didn't want to wonder where she stood with me, and where my heart really was.
“I figured that I wasn't good enough to be with someone like you, especially after all the trouble I got myself into and the mess I made of my life,” I said, feeling the raw emotions start to bubble up inside me. It was now or never.
“Next,” she said, holding up her third finger.
“That’s enough,” I said, walked up to her and took her hand in mine. “The night of our date, the night you wore that sex red dress, looking more beautiful than I had ever seen you in my life, that was the night where it changed for me. I tried to deny it for weeks, but I can’t any longer. I love you, Liv, and even though I messed it all up by telling Alice that I didn't, I am standing here, in front of you now, telling you this. You make me a better person, Liv. I’ve even stopped escorting because of you.”
“You did?” she asked.
“Yes. You were my last client.”
She frowned at me, with a mixture of relief, confusion and admiration on her face. “But what about the calls you got, and...”
“I was seeing a therapist after hours. I figured that the only way to heal properly from the pain I felt inside me, was to talk about it to someone who could help me,” I answered.
A smile of admiration formed on her lips and her brown eyes sparkled in the light. “I can’t believe that you did that. I am so proud of you.”
“I need to get my life back together, you know. I can’t be the guy I was in high school, broken and angry at the entire world. I want to be better, for you, and for myself,” I said to her.
“You know,” she whispered and brought my hand, still holding hers, up to her chest, “that is the best news I have heard all week.”
“Even better than me saying I love you?” I asked.
She pouted at me and whispered,” Say it again, but slowly.”
I brought my free hand up to her chin, drew an invisible line along her chin, and softly caressed her cheek. “I love you,” I whispered in a low tone.
She shivered slightly and sighed dreamily.
“I love
you,” I whispered again, slower than before, watching her relish in those three words that carried the weight of the entire world, yet made her feel as light as a feather.
“I love you too,” she whispered.
My heart swelled up in my chest as her words caressed my insides, making me feel more alive than I had ever felt. Liv truly had the ability to bring out the best in me, and I appreciated that more than I would ever be able to explain
I tilted her chin upwards and kissed her lips tenderly, the way I had always wanted to. Our bodies melted together by the heat of the love which coursed through us, and there was no other person in the world I’d rather be kissing than Olivia Donovan.
She was the one, and had been the One for as long as I could remember.
She pulled away slowly and gazed up at me. “I just have one question,” she whispered.
It didn't surprise me, as she always had questions. Her inquisitive mind was one of the things I adored about her, and I would easily spend the rest of my life answering her questions.
Yes, I said the rest of my life.
People who knew me, and those who thought they did, knew I wasn't the kind of person who would think of the distant future, and any kind of commitment scared the shit out of me. Honestly, it still did and I often wondered to myself how I’d be able to change my point of view, and my opinion of the future. Spending the rest of my life with only one person seemed a little daunting and terrifying to me, as I’d seen many couples drift apart over the years, becoming strangers to each other, and I didn't want that to happen. I didn't want to fall head over heals in love with someone, give everything to them and ten or fifteen years down the line, she’d take half of my stuff just because she changed into someone whom I didn't recognized.