* * *
Finn landed at the Tallahassee airport just after six o’clock on Thursday night. It hadn’t even been eight hours since that phone call from Hannah, but it had been the longest eight hours of his life.
He’d called the airline the second he got off the phone with her, heading up to his hotel room so he could shove all of his clothes into his suitcase. It had taken the taxi an hour to get to the airport (where he’d tried calling Brie again. He’d gone to voice mail before she’d sent him that text that made him want to throw his phone out the window), two hours to get onto the first flight, one hour in the air, another two hours in the Dallas Fort Worth airport, and two more hours in the air.
By the end of the flight he was about ready to come out of his skin. Sure, it was about three hours less than if he’d driven, but at least if he’d been behind the wheel he would’ve felt more in control of the situation. Instead he’d had to do a whole lot of waiting.
When Finn walked out of arrivals it was to find Shep standing there. He was both equal parts relieved and frustrated at seeing his brother. They’d already had a long conversation during Finn’s layover where Shep and been trying to be the voice of reason.
Finn didn’t want the voice of reason…he wanted to know what the fuck was going on, and Shep didn’t have any of those answers. Finn was done talking about stuff. He wanted to start taking action.
“Tripp dropped me off.” Shep took a step forward holding out his hand. “I couldn’t let you drive home.”
“Why’s that?”
“Because if Hannah had left me like that I would’ve driven my Mustang into a ditch. Give me your keys.”
Finn pulled them from his pocket and tossed them in the air. Shep caught them and the two brothers headed out of the building.
* * *
Finn had a key to Bethelda’s house. It had been a weird addition to put on his key chain a few weeks ago, but it had been necessary. Just as it had been necessary to give Brie a key to his place. They were constantly in and out of the houses at different times, so it had just made sense.
Now, nothing made sense.
He and Shep looked around, and the two most glaring things Finn noticed were that Brie had taken the books she was using for her thesis, and that there was a pile of photo albums scattered on the floor of the library/den. Besides that, almost everything had looked the same from when he’d left.
Well, that and Brie was gone. Which was the most glaring difference.
“What do you want to do?”
He wanted to shove his fist through a wall. Scream. Anything. Instead he couldn’t do anything except look around the empty house. Because if Brie wasn’t there, none of the other stuff mattered.
He didn’t want to go home, either. Go home to another house that was Brie-less. Go home to his bed that had sheets that probably still smelled like her. He wanted to be anywhere else. Be anyone else at that moment.
“I don’t know.” Finn shook his head, feeling a tightening in his throat that he refused to let himself give in to.
“Come back to the inn. Eat some dinner.”
“I’m not hungry.”
“Yeah, well, I’m not going to let you drink the amount of whiskey I know you’re going to get into until you eat. Let’s go.”
With one more look around the room, Finn followed, because he didn’t have the first clue of what else to do.
* * *
Brie woke up at five in the morning. She was so tired of being wide awake and exhausted. But what else was to be expected? She wasn’t sleeping well at all, hadn’t in days. Last night had by far been the worst, though, as she couldn’t stop thinking about Finn. Couldn’t stop thinking about how she’d walked away.
Run away.
Who did that to someone? Apparently she did have something in common with Bethelda. She’d been cruel. Cruel to the man she loved. And yes, she did love him. She knew it now. Had figured it out at the worst possible moment.
Which was the reason she’d left. Because she was a coward.
It was probably a good ten minutes before she gave up on falling asleep and dragged herself out of bed. She got into a fight with the coffeemaker, but won in the end. While it brewed she moved to the box of journals and lifted the lid.
She wasn’t even halfway through. Apparently this was a marathon, not a sprint.
When she reached in to grab the next book in the series—Wuthering Heights—her hand brushed another book in the box—A Brave New World—on the way out. As the pages fluttered she caught a flash of something shoved into the middle of the book.
Setting the journal she’d grabbed down, she reached in for the other one. Flipping to the front page she saw that it was the one from this year. Bethelda had only written in a handful of pages before she’d died in late January.
Brie let the book fall open to where she’d seen the papers shoved into the middle. There looking up at her was a close-up picture of Danny, golden brown eyes and everything.
Her legs suddenly felt wobbly and she had to brace herself against the table as she moved to a chair, almost falling into it.
She stared at the picture, taking in every part of him. His golden brown skin, almost the same shade as hers. His nose that was identical to hers. She also had his mouth…and his ears. He looked so happy as he smiled at the camera. Brie knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that Bethelda had been on the other side of that camera, taking the picture.
Brie flipped to the next picture. Bethelda and Danny were at the beach; he had his arm around her shoulders as he leaned in and gave her a kiss on the cheek. She was laughing. The kind of laugh that started deep in a person’s belly. The kind of laugh that was filled with joy.
The next picture was one of Bethelda in a white dress, looking over her shoulder and giving a slightly seductive smile to the camera. Brie wondered why Bethelda had kept that picture. Maybe to remind herself of a time when she was happy?
Who knew?
Brie flipped to the last picture in the stack to find the second shock of her morning. It was a picture of Brie. It was her senior graduation photo, the one that graced the pages of her high school yearbook. She was wearing the black velvet shawl thing that exposed her shoulders, and a string of pearls. Her hair was curled and hanging down.
It was the picture that had been put in the newspaper when Brie had been named valedictorian. Behind it was a piece of folded light blue paper, and when she unfolded it she got her third shock of the morning.
It was addressed to Brie and dated a little less than a year ago, and on her birthday.
May 12
Brie,
I don’t know if you will find this letter when I’m gone. I don’t know if you will take the time to find these journals. Not that this is a test or anything, I just don’t know you. I don’t even know if you will come down here when I die, and yes, I do know that I’m going to die.
But, we’re all dying in some way or another.
The doctors found the brain aneurysm a week ago. It’s inoperable and there’s no telling when it will burst. It could be a day, it could be a year. If the people in this town knew about it, I’m sure they’d put a wager on when I’d die. It almost makes me tempted to do it.
Anyway, I know that our one and only encounter was not pleasant, but I’m not a pleasant person. I haven’t been since Danny died. That’s because I died then, too. You know that saying, “It’s better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all”?
Well, I call bullshit. I would rather have never known what it was like to have that man in my life if he was going to be taken away from me. I’m completely and entirely selfish that way.
I don’t expect you to understand me at the end of this. And I really don’t expect you to forgive me, I don’t deserve it. In fact, I’m not asking for your forgiveness. I’m not asking for anything. I’m just saying my piece, and in doing that I show just how selfish I really am, because I never allowed you to say your piece.
But there’s something you should know.
I wouldn’t hold you the day you were born. I wouldn’t even look at you. It was because I knew you’d look like him. That day you walked into my office, you proved me correct in every way. You are without a doubt your father’s daughter. I don’t know if you take comfort in that fact or not, and I wasn’t trying to offer it. It’s just a fact.
It was beyond painful to look at you that day, but at the same time, whatever part of me still capable of feeling any sort of genuine happiness might’ve liked the fact that there was something of my Danny in this world.
—Betts
The very first thing that came to mind when Brie finished that letter was Finn. All she could think about was how she didn’t want to lose out on what they could have. Didn’t want to spend her life thinking about the what-ifs or might’ve-beens. Didn’t want to spend her life apart from the man she loved more than anything.
What had she done?
* * *
When Finn woke up on Friday morning, scratch that Friday afternoon, he had the hangover from hell. He didn’t even want to think about how much worse it would’ve been had he not eaten the pizza Hannah had waiting for them when they got home.
An ordered in pizza of course.
As Finn hadn’t been in any mood or state of mind to talk, he and Shep just drank, until four o’clock in the morning. That was why it was almost noon when he woke up with the mother of all headaches.
But it wasn’t what hurt the most. Not even close. He knew that people loved with their mind and that the heart wasn’t really what should hurt when someone had their heart broken, and yet his did. There was a physical pain in his chest that made it difficult to breathe.
Brie had left and all she’d said to him was, I had to leave. I’m sorry. I can’t do this.
He’d been through this once before, had the person he was in love with bail on him. As impossible as it sounded, Finn had fallen deeper in love with Brie in the last two months than he had in the fourteen years he’d had Rebecca in his life.
And Brie had just left him without an explanation, without anything. What the hell was that? Whatever it was, it was brutal.
He should’ve known better. He should’ve known that love wasn’t for him. He had known it actually, and then Brie had come into his life and changed his mind.
It took a pretty big effort to get out of bed and stumble across the room to the shower. Frankie lifted her head from where she slept on the floor and let out a soft whine before she got up and followed him into the bathroom, lying down right by the shower. She hadn’t left his side since he’d gotten to the inn.
Finn kept the water cold, hoping to clear some of the fog from his mind. It was minimal.
When he came out of the shower he had to dump out the clothes he’d shoved into his suitcase to find a clean pair of jeans and a T-shirt. After he got dressed, he and Frankie walked to the kitchen and into the smell of coffee brewing.
“Oh, there is a God,” Finn groaned as he rubbed his eyes before sliding his glasses onto his nose and trying to focus.
“It should be ready in a minute,” Hannah said as she pulled out some mugs from the cabinet and set them on the counter.
Finn went to the back door and tried to let Frankie outside, but she wouldn’t go.
“I let her out earlier,” Hannah said. “She should be fine.”
“She eat?”
“Nope. Didn’t even touch her food. Just went back to lie down next to you.”
“Loyal girl.” Finn patted the dog’s head as they headed for the kitchen. “Did Lo eat?”
“Yes, with me this morning. She’s currently lying on the dryer while I’m finishing a load of towels. She really is the strangest cat.”
“The strangest.” Finn agreed.
“You guys must’ve drank a lot last night. Shep just got up, too.”
“I was drinking to forget. It takes a lot of whiskey to get there.”
“And how does it feel to remember now?”
“Worse.” He pulled up a bar stool and sat down, Frankie resting her head in his lap.
“Oh, honey.” Hannah reached over and grabbed his hand. “I’m sorry I didn’t stop her from leaving.”
“What were you going to do? Let the air out of her tires?”
“That would’ve been a smart idea. Why didn’t I think of that?”
A low chuckle filled the room as Shep came into the kitchen and walked up behind her, wrapping his arms around her waist as he kissed the top of her head. “Babe, you aren’t as devious as Finn and I are.”
“Clearly not.”
Finn had to turn away, the sight of his brother and sister-in-law in a moment of genuine affection was too much for him.
Way too much for him.
“I’ll be back…I need to check on your son who’s taking a nap.”
Finn lifted his head just as Hannah kissed Shep and headed out of the kitchen.
“Go eat.” Finn told Frankie. She gave him a reproachful look and he pointed to the bowl. She nudged his hand before she got up and headed over to her food.
“How you feeling?” Shep asked as he leaned back against the counter.
“Like death.”
“Sometimes you have to hit rock bottom before you can pull yourself back up. Believe me, I know better than anyone.”
Finn did believe his brother, mainly because he was there the night Shep hit rock bottom with Hannah. Watched as his brother drank himself into oblivion before he begged Finn to take him back to her.
“What’s your plan?” Shep asked.
“I don’t have one.”
“You just going to let her walk?”
“What choice do I have?”
“Go after her.” Shep said it like it was the simplest answer in the world.
“How the hell am I supposed to do that? I don’t know where she is. She won’t answer her phone.”
“So you just give up?”
“I don’t have the first clue where to start.”
“Go to her house. In North Carolina. Find out who her friends are. Maybe they know where she is. Maybe they’ll talk to her. You’ve got nothing to lose except for her.”
“Yeah, except for her.” Finn repeated.
“You know, I realized something three years ago with Hannah. Sometimes there are loves in your life that you can’t forget, and others that you can’t let go of. My first time around with Hannah? She was the girl I couldn’t forget. When she came back? She was the woman there was no chance in hell I was letting go of. Rebecca was a girl you couldn’t forget. What’s Brie? Are you just going to let her go?”
Brie was the love of his life.
“No.” He wasn’t going to let her go without a fight.
* * *
It was close to two in the afternoon when Brie’s MINI Cooper crossed the county line into Mirabelle. If she thought she was terrified when she left, it was nothing, nothing, to how she felt now.
After reading that letter—fourteen times—Brie had quickly packed all of her things and was on the road by seven. She’d made the biggest mistake of her life. Love didn’t destroy people. That was a choice. Bethelda made that choice…she’d given up on life. Instead of seeing what a gift she’d been given, even for a brief moment, she saw it as a curse. That wasn’t how Brie wanted to live.
She’d prescribed by no regrets, and she’d just made the biggest mistake of her life. If she couldn’t fix this with Finn, she’d have regrets all right.
If? No ifs. She was going to fix this. There was no other possible outcome.
It was then that it happened, her steering wheel started to vibrate—along with the rest of the car—as the telltale sound of whap whap whap whap echoed from outside.
“No. No, no, no, no.”
Brie pulled off to the side of the road and got out of her car. She rounded to the back to see that she very clearly had a flat tire. The kind that not even Fix-a-Flat could help, which was all she had as MINI Coope
rs did not have spare tires.
And in that moment she was now regretting most of her life choices.
“Shit.”
She went back to the front seat, leaning over the console and searching for her phone in her purse. She hadn’t powered it up since she’d turned it off the day before, she’d been so focused on just getting back to Finn.
When it finally got to the home screen—it took for freaking ever—there was so signal.
“Dammit!”
OK, so she could either stand there and wait for someone to drive by…or start walking. Luckily for her, it was towards the end of March and rather pleasant outside for a spring afternoon. She’d just made the decision to start walking when she spotted a car coming around the bend about a mile off.
“Well, that was luck.”
But as the car got closer she realized it was a truck…a big black truck, and that Finn was behind the wheel.
* * *
Finn stared through the windshield for a full ten seconds—or was it ten minutes?—trying to convince himself what he was seeing was real. That Brie was in fact standing in front of him wearing a little white dress and hot pink Converse sneakers.
After that morning’s conversation with Shep, Finn had gone home, packed another bag, swung by Bethelda’s house to find the boxes Brie had shipped there, and got the address of her friend in North Carolina.
He was going to go after Brie. Find her.
Turned out he didn’t have to go very far. Just ten miles up the road.
Brie’s mouth had fallen open in a startled “O” when she saw that it was him behind the wheel of the truck. Well, she wasn’t the only one who was surprised.
He unbuckled his seat belt and got out, slamming the door behind him as he took a few steps forward. She was probably a good five yards away from him.
“Hi.”
He had to swallow down the response that burned his throat. He wanted to yell What the fuck, Brie? But somewhere in the back of his mind, he knew that wasn’t the best idea. “Hi? I get a hi? Do you have any idea what the last twenty-four hours have been like for me?”
“I’m sorry, Finn. I messed up. You can’t possibly know how much I know that.”
Untold Page 33