by Evers, Lana
Fuck.
If only she knew…
I hoped for the same thing, too.
It was the one thing I wanted the most in the world, but it was impossible. She was my sister, and I was her brother.
“Misha.” She trembled at the sound of my voice, and I fucking loved the way her chest rose and fell in reaction to it. I loved it, even though I knew it was wrong.
Fuck, fuck, fuck.
Everything about this was wrong.
My head lowered, the realization of what I was supposed to do causing me to feel the most agonizing pain.
“There you are, you two.” It was Hector’s voice.
When I looked up, our parents had joined us, both of them beaming. I could only stand still as Hector and Elizabeth embraced me. When they stepped back, Elizabeth exclaimed, “I thought you wouldn’t be able to meet us.”
I managed a smile. “I wanted to surprise you guys.”
Hector grinned. “We were surprised. But I bet the happiest among us is this little one.” He ruffled Misha’s hair. “She could barely sit still the entire flight, she was so excited to see you.”
When Misha blushed at our dad’s words, my body reacted to the sight. It was as if my cock had suddenly developed its own brain, and all it wanted was to stay erect with every little thing my sister did.
“Go and give your brother a hug,” Elizabeth prodded.
I stiffened even as Misha protested, “Mom!”
I couldn’t let her fucking hug me now, not with my dick rock hard against my pants. She only had to come into the slightest bit of contact with my body, and she’d know right away.
I wanted her, and not in the way a brother should.
“It’s okay, Mom,” I drawled just as Misha took a step towards me. “I wouldn’t want anyone mistaking her as my girlfriend.”
My parents laughed. To them, the words were no big deal.
But to Misha…
My heart clenched at the flash of hurt in her eyes. After the dig I made about her when she was thinking of going on a date with another boy, I knew the words would hurt.
The way they were meant to.
From now on, for her sake and mine, it would be the only way I could talk to her.
Part II: The Kiss
1
“You’re so nice.” People told her that all the time, and Misha thought the same of them. They were so nice as well. So much so they couldn’t make themselves say what they really thought.
Everyone thought she was too nice, bordering on naïve. Misha thought the same thing herself, too, until…today.
Alone in one of the tables at the back of McDonald’s, she had been waiting for Elizabeth to pick her up when she heard a couple of girls laughingly make their way to the table across hers.
As Misha rummaged through her things, looking for something to while the time away, she heard one of them gush, “I can’t believe it.”
“Mm hmm…” was the coy reply.
“You really did it with him? Really?”
At her words, Misha quickly pulled out a book from her backpack and opened it randomly. She felt like she needed it to hide her face behind. It didn’t feel right, being able to hear what they were talking about. But at the same time, she couldn’t stop herself from listening in. It was just so fascinating, something that would never happen in her world. Even though she was about to graduate from high school in a few months, her life hadn’t changed at all. Her time was divided between school and home, with nothing in between.
“Up to you if you don’t want to believe me.” The words were drawled in a quietly smug voice. It had Misha curious enough to lower the book a little so she could peek at the speaker’s face.
Misha recognized the other girl immediately. It was none other than Jannie Ellens, a girl who graduated the same year as her brother. Also, the girl who had once caused Misha to throw a tantrum because Jannie had told her she didn’t have a brother.
Suddenly, she didn’t want to hear anymore. She had a bad feeling about this.
“You have to tell me what happened. Please. Take pity!” Jannie’s redhead friend begged.
Jannie feigned a deep sigh. “Oh…fine.”
As they talked, Misha did her best to block out the sound of their voices, but it was impossible.
“Where did you do it?” When Jannie named an expensive hotel downtown, Redhead Girl gasped, asking, “Isn’t that his mother’s place? His real mother, I mean?”
The sick feeling in Misha’s stomach worsened. In their small town, she could only think of one person whose mother owned a hotel – an entire hotel chain in fact.
Deep inside, she already knew who they were talking about, but a part of her still wanted to deny it.
Jannie boasted, “He booked the penthouse suite for us and it was…” She sighed again. “It was just beautiful.” Her voice lowered a notch, but her tone was just as smug as she revealed, “And we did it in every room in that suite.” A smile curved on her lips as she emphasized, “Every room.”
Redhead Girl shrieked in excitement at the words, and everyone turned to look at them.
Jannie laughed. “Will you shut up? You’ll have everyone knowing I did it with Saehan Charbonneau.” But she said the words so loudly it was obvious she really did want everyone to know.
Misha’s heart dropped like a stone.
She had always known her brother was far from being a saint. She only had to check gossip sites online to know who he was dating, who he was…fucking.
But all these years, she had stopped herself from finding out.
Until now.
It was her first time to hear about Saehan and another girl, and it didn’t feel right. It felt like the most excruciating…betrayal.
A moment later, and her phone vibrated in her pocket. Taking it out, Misha almost laughed hysterically at the name that showed on her screen. Oh, the irony.
Saehan Charbonneau.
Her brother.
Saehan: Mom’s going to be late. I’ll be the one to pick you up instead.
Misha: Okay.
They used to have longer conversations than this. Conversations that were also more fun, more…affectionate. But ever since his graduation in England, things had changed between them.
In the background, Misha heard Jannie and her friend talking again—
“Fourteen inches, Jen,” Jannie stressed. “Fourteen!”
Misha whitened when she realized what they were talking about.
“…it was the longest I had ever seen, and oh, the way Saehan could keep it up for so long…I was exhausted.”
Misha’s hands shook as she lowered her book to the table.
“…would you believe I passed out?”
Suddenly, she could picture it so clearly.
Jannie and Saehan in one bed, their naked bodies straining against each other. Jannie’s arms going around Saehan’s neck, her nails raking over the smooth hard panes of his back as he reared up and thrust—
Misha’s phone vibrated in her pocket again, cutting the scene short. She felt like catching her breath as she fumbled for her phone. It wasn’t a good kind of breathless, though. It was the kind that made breathing hurt, a lot.
Saehan: I’ll be there in 15. Maybe 20. Can you still wait?
Misha: Yes.
Saehan: Are you okay? Did something happen?
Jannie was telling her friend she was sure Saehan would call her again. Would take her to the hotel again.
Saehan: Misha?
Misha: There’s a girl here. She’s saying things about you.
Saehan: WHAT THINGS?
Misha: Like, how you took her to the hotel…and did…stuff.
Saehan didn’t reply.
That was fine. She knew what was going to happen.
Five minutes later, and he was there.
Everyone at the place sort of sat up at his presence, and the way they looked at him made Misha feel so foolish.
Why had she never noticed this be
fore? Why was she realizing just now how, to everyone else in town, he wasn’t just Saehan Charbonneau, a former high school quarterback, the son of Hector and Elizabeth Charbonneau?
They looked at him like he was royalty, and to them, he probably was. His mother was Vivian St. Clair - England’s wealthiest woman entrepreneur – and he was the sole heir of all her billions.
If not for a twist of fate, he should have been royalty to Misha, too.
Everyone was staring at him, but Saehan didn’t seem to notice. He wore a grimly furious expression - one Misha knew she was to blame for.
She should feel guilty for that, but she didn’t. Right now, she just felt…different. Terrifyingly different.
Saehan found her the exact time Jannie realized he was there. Her friend Jen had realized the same thing, too, and she gasped excitedly, “Oh my God, is he stalking you?”
“Of course not.” But Jannie ruined it by giggling and tossing her hair over her shoulder. Silence followed, and Misha knew she was confidently waiting for her brother to look at her.
But he didn’t.
He couldn’t since he was still staring at Misha. She could feel it, even though she was busy pretending she was checking her phone, unable to find the courage to see how things unfolded from here.
“Who is she?” Misha heard Jen whisper.
“I’m not quite sure.” This time, Jannie’s voice was tight. Chairs scraped against the floor as she and her friend stood up. A moment later, and Misha heard her cooing, “Saehan.”
Ah. Jannie had stopped him on his way to her table.
Silence.
Misha’s stomach started hurting again. Could she stop this? Did she really want to?
A moment of clarity, and she bit her lip hard.
No.
She wanted Jannie to hurt as much as she was hurting now.
Jannie let out a nervous laugh. “Sae—”
“Will you get out of my way?” In his defense, Saehan had spoken quietly, albeit in a curt manner. It wasn’t his fault everyone was eavesdropping, and when someone in the background tittered, Misha knew it was going to get worse.
That was when it was clear to Misha. How everyone was wrong about her. She wasn’t too nice like everyone thought she was. She wasn’t nice at all.
She could be a bitch if she wanted to. She just needed the right reason.
Misha grabbed her backpack and scrambled off her seat. “Saehan,” she called out urgently, hurrying to the three of them.
But it was already too late.
Jannie had slapped her brother’s face. “How dare you?”
Misha stumbled to a stop at the look on the woman’s face. She wasn’t crying, and her chin was lifted high. But somehow, that made it all worse. For all her bragging, Jannie really had felt something for Saehan.
Her brother’s face remained expressionless, and his tone was coldly bored as he asked, “Are you done?”
He suddenly leaned forward, his face inching close to Jannie’s.
His proximity had Jannie trembling, and Misha found herself both sick and fascinated at how Saehan could so easily affect the other girl.
When he spoke, the silence in the place made his words audible to everyone.
“If you want me to fuck you again, keep your mouth shut.” His lip curled. “And we both know you want to. I’m not going to warn you again. You ever dirty my sister’s ears about me, you will cease to exist to me. Do you understand?”
Saehan stepped back.
The words sank in.
Misha covered her mouth.
In front of her, Jannie’s face whitened as she stumbled back. She looked around her feverishly as if she was silently begging for someone to defend her. But no one did, not even her friend. When Jannie looked at her, Jen only swallowed and glanced away, as if not wanting to share in her friend’s humiliation.
Jannie spun around, and that was when she saw her. Recognized Misha as the only one who could have told Saehan about what she had said.
Hatred flashed in her eyes just before she stalked away, shoving past Misha.
She lost her balance.
“Misha!” It was Saehan, gripping her hand tightly as he kept her from falling.
For a moment, all she could do was hold on to him tightly. The world had turned into a blur, shame burning her alive.
“Wait here.” Anger vibrated in her brother’s tone.
Misha tightened her grip on his hand. “No, Sae.” She knew right away he wanted to go after Jannie. “Please. It’s all right.”
She heard him breathing hard. “Mish…” He tried to tip her chin up, but she shook her head hard. Misha expected Saehan to refuse to heed her, but after a moment, he simply reached for her bag. Gripping her other hand tightly, Saehan drew her out, his arm curling around her shoulders protectively.
It had been over a year since they last held each other like this. It wasn’t right that what she did to Jannie was the reason they could be like this again. Wasn’t right that because of Misha being bitchy, she could feel this good.
She closed her eyes.
Her brother’s body was hard and hot against her side, his strength a tangible presence that made Misha want to melt into him.
Saehan’s personal driver was waiting for them by the curb. He quickly opened the door at the sight of them, and Saehan helped her in first. Inside his limousine, she quickly moved to the opposite seat and huddled against the corner.
Misha heard the door close a moment later. Another moment and she heard Saehan speak. “Misha?”
The sound of his voice was gentle, so much gentler than how he talked to her most of the time now, and it hurt.
Misha quickly turned towards the darkly tinted window, her teeth sinking into her lower lip. In the past, if something happened, she would have no hesitation. She would run to Saehan, crying, knowing he’d be able to say something, do something, to comfort her.
“Look at me, Misha.”
Slowly, she did.
He was gazing at her, his sculpted face made harder by strongly repressed emotions. He was still Saehan Charbonneau, still her brother, but somehow it wasn’t the same. It was no longer the same, hadn’t ever been the same since the time she mistook him for another guy and almost came on to him.
But now, when she heard Jannie speak of him like he belonged to her, heard Jannie speak of his body like she knew every inch of it, tasted every part of it—
A choked cry escaped Mish. She tried to keep it inside, covering her mouth again, but it was too late.
In front of her, Saehan cursed.
“Misha.” His voice was still quiet, but under it was something…urgent. Desperate. As if he had also sensed something had started to change, and he didn’t want it to happen.
Oh God, did he know?
Had he known all this time, what she was realizing just now?
She loved him.
Oh God, she loved Saehan Charbonneau, and not as his little sister.
“Tell me what’s wrong.”
Misha shook her head. “Nothing’s wrong.”
He swore again. “Something’s clearly wrong—” He breathed hard. “Was it because of what you heard? What Jannie said?”
Unbidden, the vision that had taken hold of her mind reasserted itself. Saehan and Jannie, their naked bodies writhing in bed, her breasts pressing against his chest—
2
The stricken expression on his sister’s face made him want to punch something hard. “Forget what you heard,” Saehan gritted out.
Misha let out a hysterical laugh. “Do you even know what she said?”
“No,” he said, his voice clipped. “And I don’t want to—”
“His dick was so fucking long it was like I was with a porn star,” Misha threw at him.
Saehan stilled, not because of what she was saying, but because of how she was looking at him.
“He fucked me so many times I lost count,” Mish hissed. “I came so hard I almost passed out—”
What’s wrong with her? Hysterical laughter threatened to bubble out of Misha. The way she felt when she heard Jannie talk about Saehan, the way she felt when Saehan held her, the way she felt about her brother –
All of it was wrong.
I hate this. I hate you. I hate having you as my brother.
When Saehan spoke, it was only then that she realized she had spoken it out loud.
“That’s fine,” he said tightly. “I hate having you as my sister, too.”
3
The sun was shining brightly, the sky a perfect blue. Best of all, Misha had lost five pounds in time for her high school graduation. But what really made her happy, secretly, was the guy standing behind Elizabeth.
He had come!
She had thought he wouldn’t, after the last words she had spoken to him. He avoided being with her every chance he got since then, and she had feared he would bail out of today’s occasion.
But he had not.
He was there.
Saehan Charbonneau.
“Come on, Misha, smile for the camera one more time,” Elizabeth cajoled. “Lift your hands up, show off the flowers Saehan gave you.”
She couldn’t help grimacing at the request but did so anyway.
“I don’t think she’s that happy about the flowers.” The lazy drawl came from Saehan himself. His British accent had become more pronounced these days. On one hand, it made his voice really sexy, enough to have Misha’s heart skipping a beat. On the other, it made her sad because it symbolized how much time Saehan spent away from their home.
At her brother’s words, Misha wanted to shake her head and protest. She loved the flowers. She loved everything he gave her. She loved him…period.
But she couldn’t ever risk saying the words.
Ever.
“That’s not true,” Elizabeth was protesting. “Tell your brother it’s not so, Mish.”
Their mother’s insistent words left her with no choice, and she muttered, “I appreciate the flowers.” Unfortunately, she couldn’t help sounding like she had to be tortured to say the words.