by Jan Drexler
“You’re coming to Sunday meeting with us?” Abraham asked as he scraped his plate clean.
Abraham’s voice was pleasant, and the question was casual, but Gideon wasn’t sure what to answer. “I don’t want to leave Lovinia alone.”
“Ruby will stay with your wife today.” Abraham went to the stove to refill his coffee cup. “A father needs to take his family to worship.”
Gideon nodded. He had preached a sermon on that very subject, but it had been months since they had attended a worship service.
Lydia came down the stairs, a poultice in her hands.
“Your wife is awake and asking for you,” she said. “She’s feeling better today and breathing easier. The poultices are just what she needed.”
Gideon rose. “I am beholden to you for all that you’ve done. I’ll go and speak with Lovinia before we leave for the service.” He paused, cupping his hand over Ezra’s head. “I’ve been neglectful in so many things concerning my family, and if Lovinia is doing better, I will be glad to take my children to church.”
Roseanna bounced in her chair. “Will you be preaching, Daed?”
Gideon glanced toward Abraham. “Not today, daughter.”
“You’re a minister?” Abraham asked.
The stone in his stomach turned. “That was a long time ago, and too much has happened since then.” Gideon shook his head. “My preaching days are over.”
Abraham leaned toward him, his elbows on the table. “If you were called to be a minister, that calling doesn’t end.”
“Unless the Good Lord himself makes it clear. I no longer have a church. There is no longer a flock for me to shepherd.” He shook his head again. “Ne, I am no longer a minister.”
Abraham didn’t say any more, and Gideon went up the stairs, feeling the older man’s gaze upon him. Abraham was right. When a minister was called, it was for life. But whose life? His? Or the congregation’s?
Lovinia’s eyes were bright and she smiled when he appeared in the doorway. She reached her hand toward him. “How are the children this morning?”
“Eating a good breakfast and happy that we aren’t traveling today.”
Gideon took his wife’s hand as he sat in the chair. It was cool and dry. With his other hand he brushed her hair back from her forehead and let his palm rest on her brow. The fever seemed to be less today.
“Lydia said that her daughter Ruby would keep me company while you take the children to Meeting this morning.”
“Do you mind being alone with her? I know how you dislike meeting strangers.”
Lovinia gave him one of her beautiful smiles. “She was here last evening, and I like her. She isn’t fussy like some women can be.” She squeezed his hand. “Besides, the children haven’t been to a Sunday meeting for months. They need to go. But will you leave Daniel here?”
“Are you sure he won’t be too much trouble?”
“I don’t want to miss spending time with him . . . with any of them. And he will only fuss during the service.” A shadow passed over her face as she spoke, and she averted her gaze.
Gideon took her hand in both of his and kissed it. “You’re gaining strength quickly. Rest and good food are what you need, and the Weavers are generous with both. You’ll soon be caring for the children again.”
She met his eyes and smiled again. “Ja, for sure. You’re right.”
Hearing footsteps on the stairs, Gideon leaned over and kissed Lovinia’s forehead. “I’ll come back as soon as I can.”
She tugged at his hand. “You will not. You will stay for the fellowship meal and learn to know the folks from this church. Then when you get home, I want to hear everything.”
With a soft knock on the doorframe, Ruby Weaver came into the room. “You look much better today, Lovinia.”
She nodded at Gideon as she crossed the room and opened the window. The day promised to be warm and humid, with soft clouds scattered across the sky. Ruby’s red hair was as wild as on the first day he had met her, with strands dancing above her kapp in the breeze from the open window.
“Are you sure it’s a good idea to have the wind blowing into the room when Lovinia is so ill?”
Ruby flashed a grin in his direction as she tucked the blankets under Lovinia’s mattress. “Mamm believes that fresh air is the best cure, as long as the sick person doesn’t get chilly.” She pulled a rocking chair from the corner of the room and took a seat. “As long as the breeze is as light as it is now, we shouldn’t have a problem.”
Gideon cleared his throat, chasing away the comment he longed to make about bossy women. Lovinia was smiling at Ruby as she rested on her pillows. Roseanna had been right. Ruby’s presence was enough to make Lovinia feel better.
“Is it all right with you if Daniel stays with the two of you this morning?” Gideon tried to look everywhere but the young woman’s face. “Lovinia asked if he could.”
“For sure and for certain,” Ruby said. “Having the baby around will make the morning go quickly, won’t it?”
Gideon was sure a wink passed between the two women, and Lovinia actually giggled. What did his family see in this forward girl that he didn’t? No decorum, no sense of propriety. Not even the proper solemn mood fit for the Sabbath.
“Don’t frown so, Gideon,” Lovinia said. “It is so refreshing to feel a bit of joy after our long time of suffering.”
A sudden fit of coughing caught them all by surprise. Gideon’s heart pounded as he lifted Lovinia upright in the bed. He pounded her back with his fist, trying to loosen whatever was making her cough, but Ruby grabbed his hand.
“Don’t hit her like that. You might break her ribs. Just support her.”
Ruby grabbed a towel and Lovinia clutched it, holding it to her mouth. Her body was racked with the violence of the coughs, and every time she took air into her lungs, it triggered another bout. Gideon clung to her shoulders until Ruby loosened his grip and showed him how to allow Lovinia to lean on his arm.
Once the coughing fit was over, Ruby laid his wife back on the pillows. Her closed eyes were shadowed and thread-like blue veins lined the paper-thin eyelids. Her body trembled with each breath.
“I should stay with her.” Gideon’s voice shook as he looked across the bed at Ruby. “If something should happen while I’m gone—”
“Nothing will happen.” Ruby’s lips were stretched in a thin line. “It’s the poultice. It has loosened the congestion, and that is good. She needs to cough to clear her lungs.” She smoothed Lovinia’s hair from her cheeks. “If you were to panic like that while you were alone with her, I hate to think what might happen.”
Gideon felt his face heat. “I didn’t panic.” He ground his teeth together to keep his voice even. “I was only concerned about my wife.”
“You panicked. If I hadn’t been here—”
Ruby stopped when Lovinia laid a hand on her arm.
“Don’t argue about it.” She opened her eyes, her color back to normal. “Gideon, you are going to take the children to Sunday Meeting. You will stay for the entire day, and when you get home, you will tell me all about the good people who live here in the Weaver’s Creek community.” She smiled at him. “I will be fine. Ruby and I will take care of Daniel, and I promise that I will rest as much as I can.”
Gideon hesitated, his gaze shifting from his wife’s weak but confident smile to Ruby’s composed expression. Roseanna’s feet pounded on the stairs.
“Daed, we’re ready to go,” she said as she came into the room.
Lovinia held her arms out for Roseanna’s hug, and then the girl tugged at Gideon’s shirt.
“The Weavers said that it is time to go.”
“Calm down,” Gideon said. “I’m coming. You go on ahead and I’ll catch up with you before you reach the road.”
“I’ll come downstairs with you,” Ruby said, taking Roseanna’s hand. “I need to get Daniel and bring him up.”
Once they left, Gideon took Lovinia’s hand again. “Are you sure
you’ll be all right?”
She smoothed his forehead with her other hand, then patted his cheek. “For sure, I will. Ruby will take good care of me.”
Gideon kissed her forehead, then stepped out of the room. Before he descended the staircase, he glanced back at Lovinia. She had closed her eyes again, and her chest rose and fell with every quick, shallow breath. In spite of her assurances, Gideon felt a sudden fear that she would not recover from this illness. She was too weak, and she had been ill for too long. Even the Weavers’ hospitality couldn’t cure every illness.
By the time Ruby ascended the stairs with the baby in her arms, the families had crossed the stone bridge on their way to the Sunday meeting at the Beilers’ home. Lovinia struggled to sit up when she saw Daniel.
“Let me help you,” Ruby said, setting the baby on the floor.
Daniel crawled to the bed and grasped the quilt that hung over the edge, grinning at his mother while Ruby placed another pillow behind Lovinia’s back. Then lifting Daniel, Ruby perched the baby on the edge of the bed where Lovinia could hold him close.
“This poor child,” Lovinia said. “All he knows is a sick mother.”
“He’s almost nine months old, isn’t he? Has your illness lasted that long?”
Ruby sat on the chair by the bed, ready to catch Daniel if he decided to try to crawl off the edge.
“I never felt like I recovered from his birth.” Lovinia brushed Daniel’s fine hair off his forehead. “I just couldn’t get my strength back, even though the women from our church brought nourishing meals and cared for the older children. Then when the soldiers started passing along our road, it was like a plague of locusts. They took every bit of food they could find, leaving us with only the little we managed to hide.”
Ruby had no experience with soldiers, except when her brother, Jonas, had come home from the army for a visit during the winter. His uniform had caused no end of gossip in their little community, even though he worked in the army hospitals rather than carrying a gun.
“You mean the soldiers stole your food?”
Lovinia nodded. “Even if they had asked, I couldn’t have refused them. The poor men were so hungry. I could see it in their eyes.” She paused, her eyes focused on memories Ruby couldn’t see. “One group butchered our milk cow, then the next took the sow and all the piglets. They tore down the fences to feed their campfires and harvested the oats before they were even ripe.”
Daniel yawned, then laid his head down, snuggled in his mother’s arms. Ruby looked out the window toward the neat, prosperous fields of her father’s farm. Could the ravaging armies come as far north as Ohio?
“Where was your husband when all this was happening?”
Lovinia stroked the baby’s back. “When the first group came, he tried to reason with them. But there were too many. After that, he would take us to hide in the woods to wait until the soldiers left.” She rested her head on the pillow. “But then Gideon was gone.”
“Gone?”
“He planned a trip to Oakland, fifteen miles away, to trade for some food for us. Most of our church had moved already, taking their families to Pennsylvania until the war is over, but the few that were left asked Gideon to make the trip for all of us.”
Ruby leaned forward. “What happened?”
Lovinia shook her head. “I didn’t know. He didn’t come home from that trip. As the weeks went by, the other families gave up hope. They left, one by one, moving farther north, away from the armies. But I couldn’t abandon our farm. Not without knowing what had happened to Gideon.”
“You were all alone with the children.” Now Roseanna’s story made sense. “That’s when you became ill.”
“I was so afraid for them.” Lovinia’s voice was a whisper. “What would happen to them when I died? I prayed that I would survive long enough to make certain they would be brought up in a Christian home.”
“But your husband did come home.” Ruby smiled at her. “And you didn’t die.”
The corners of Lovinia’s mouth trembled as she smiled. “Ja, Gideon came home. He had been forced to use his team and wagon to haul supplies for one of the armies. He finally came home when the company he was with was destroyed in a battle. He said the soldiers who weren’t killed were captured, but the officers of the other side let him come back to us.”
Daniel had fallen asleep, so Ruby laid him in the cot next to his mother’s bed.
“Can I get anything for you?” Ruby asked. “Some tea? Or something to eat?”
Lovinia’s face was pale against the linen pillow cover, and her lips had a pale blue tinge.
“Could you read to me from the Good Book? Gideon used to read to me in the evenings before he went away, but he hasn’t since he got back.”
Ruby ran downstairs to fetch Daed’s old Bible from the shelf in the front room and a cup of water for Lovinia. By the time she returned upstairs, Lovinia had turned on her side and was watching Daniel sleep in his cot.
“I can’t seem to look at him enough.” She let Ruby help her sit up enough to drink some water. “My time with him has been so short, and I wonder if he’ll remember me.”
“Why wouldn’t he remember you?” Ruby sat on the chair by the bed again. “You’re so much better today than you were yesterday, and in another week, you’ll be back to normal.”
Lovinia shook her head as she settled back on her pillow. “I don’t believe I’m going to recover from this illness.” She grasped Ruby’s hand. “Sometimes, I feel death in the room, as if it’s waiting for me.”
“Don’t talk that way,” Ruby said. “You’re not going to die. Mamm knows all about nursing sick people back to health.”
Lovinia smiled again. “I like you, Ruby. Every time you come into this room you bring sunshine with you.”
Ruby grinned and squeezed her hand. “Most folks say I bring trouble with me.”
“Why?”
“I know I’m too outspoken but can’t seem to keep myself from saying whatever comes into my head.”
“I consider that to be a good quality. You can always tell me what you think.”
Lovinia pulled her hand from Ruby’s and closed her eyes. Her face was still pale, and her breathing was shallow. For the first time, Ruby wondered if Lovinia’s illness might be worse than it appeared.
“If you would rather sleep, I can read to you later.”
“Ne, don’t go. I don’t want to be alone.”
“Then I’ll read while you rest.” Ruby settled back in her chair.
Lovinia opened her eyes again. “I’m sorry I’m so selfish. You are missing the Sunday meeting and an opportunity to see your friends.”
Ruby leafed through the pages of the heavy book. “Don’t worry about that. I don’t have many friends, so I won’t be missed.”
She turned the pages until she found the beginning of the book of Matthew in the New Testament. Glancing at Lovinia, she saw that the woman was staring at her. “What is wrong?”
“I can’t believe you don’t have friends. Kind people gather friends like daisies.”
Ruby smoothed the stiff page of the old book. “I suppose Katie is my friend.” She glanced at Lovinia. “Katie Stuckey, who lives just up the road. She is quite a bit younger than I am, but she is going to marry my brother Jonas as soon as the war is over and he comes home.”
Lovinia smiled. “I knew you had a friend. Who else?”
“Elizabeth is my sister, and she’s a friend too. But I live with her, so we spend a lot of time together. We get along well.”
“What about the other women? The girls you grew up with?”
Ruby’s thoughts went back to her school days. “They never liked me. When we were young, they used to tease me about—” Ruby pressed her lips together and stared at the page on her lap as the letters blurred together. The three other girls her age had always shunned her. “Now that we’re all grown, they don’t include me in their talk and gossiping.” She shrugged. “They are all married and bus
y with little ones.” Ruby let her gaze drift to Daniel, sleeping in his cot.
“So, you don’t have anything in common with them?” Lovinia’s face was still pale against her pillow, but the blue of her lips had turned to a healthier pink color.
Ruby shrugged again. “I don’t care. I don’t want to be friends with them, anyway.”
“I don’t think that’s true. Every woman needs a friend. Someone you can giggle with and share secrets with. Can you do those things with Katie or Elizabeth?”
“Katie is preoccupied with her plans for the future, and Elizabeth . . .” Ruby didn’t want to gossip about her sister. “Elizabeth has her own life to worry about.”
“Then I’ll be your friend, if you’ll let me.” Lovinia was smiling, her face brighter than Ruby had seen her before.
“You don’t even know me.”
“But I like you, and I’ll grow to love you, just as you’ll learn to love me.” Lovinia reached out and Ruby took her hand. “Please, Ruby. I’ve been so lonely.”
Something tickled in the back of Ruby’s throat, and she swallowed. She knew what it was like to be lonely. “All right.” She couldn’t keep back a smile as Lovinia squeezed her hand. “I’ll be your friend.”
“And I’ll be yours.” Lovinia relaxed against the pillow, still smiling.
“But now you need to rest.” Ruby turned to the book in her lap again. “I’ll only read as long as you close your eyes and don’t talk.”
“I promise,” Lovinia said, but she didn’t close her eyes right away. A tear slid from the corner of her eye. “Thank you, Ruby. You don’t know how much better I feel, knowing you’re here.”
Ruby pasted a frown on her face. “I mean it. No talking.”
Lovinia smiled and closed her eyes. Ruby started reading aloud, concentrating on the list of names in the genealogy of Christ. When she reached the end of chapter one of Matthew, she glanced at her charge. Lovinia’s face was relaxed, her breathing even, but a trace of a smile still rested on her lips.
A friend.
Ruby closed the Bible, rose from her chair, and started to go downstairs. She paused at the top of the stairs and glanced back into the room to make sure both mother and son were still sleeping. Lovinia coughed a little and turned on her side but didn’t awaken.