by BETH KERY
Esa turned to Finn. She’d been aware of his steady gaze fixed on her during the entire exchange with Ms. Angstrom. Now that she’d had a moment to reflect back on it, she recognized his bulky clothing as belonging to one of the men that had been trying to push the IDOT truck out of the express lane.
“I know you’re probably very busy with everything going on but would you mind coming? I may need some help.”
“Sure,” he replied gruffly.
Toni Angstrom led them to a white Oldsmobile. Esa instructed Toni to get back into the driver’s seat. She said a quick hello to the elderly gentlemen who sat in the passenger seat as she settled a whimpering Scott in the back. Toni shakily introduced Esa and her father, Eli Shore, to one another.
Esa stood and squinted to see Finn’s face through the swirling snow.
“My car is right over there,” she said, pointing.
“Where?” he asked, obviously confused.
“There…the dark blue Lexus.” She felt her cheeks color when he met her gaze steadily. Maybe he’d been looking for the Ferrari, she thought with a flash of embarrassment. “The keys are still in the ignition. If you could get them, my purse and my medical bag out of the trunk, I’d really appreciate it.”
Finn nodded and started to go.
“Oh, and the bottle of water next to the driver’s seat, please!” Esa called out. She really needed to try to get some fluid into the little boy. Finn turned and nodded once in understanding.
Esa clambered into the backseat of the Oldsmobile and closed the door. She spent the next minute trying to calm and comfort Toni Angstrom equally as much as the sick child. At one point Scott’s grandfather turned with unnatural stiffness in his seat. Esa peered at him through the semi-darkness.
The back of her neck prickled a warning.
“Ms. Angstrom, can you please turn on the inside lights?” Esa asked.
“Certainly,” the woman replied. She looked a little surprised when she did so and turned around to see the doctor staring not at her sick child but at her father.
“Are you feeling all right, Mr. Shore?” Esa asked, taking in his pale face tinged with a sickly shade of grayish-blue. He seemed barely able to turn around in his seat he held his shoulders and chest so stiffly. Pain pinched his features. As Esa watched, he clutched briefly at his left shoulder and winced.
The elderly gentlemen glanced uneasily at his daughter before he answered. Esa’s heart went out to him. He was obviously worried about frightening the distraught woman any more than she already was.
“I’m doing just fine. Worried about my grandson, of course,” he said in a thin, thready voice.
“Do you have a heart condition?” Esa asked softly.
His lips thinned. He nodded almost imperceptibly before Toni could turn her anxious gaze to him.
Esa gave what she hoped was a reassuring smile. Panic wouldn’t do anyone any good at this point. “Try to relax, Mr. Shore. Your grandson is going to be just fine. You can turn down the lights, Mrs. Angstrom.”
When she saw Finn approaching, Esa quickly got out of the car and shut the door behind her.
“What’s wrong?” Finn said when he saw her face.
Esa reached quickly for the medical bag he carried along with her purse.
“Are there any lanes open at all for emergency medical vehicles?” she asked quietly.
His brow furrowed. “The express lane has been closed for emergency vehicle use only because of the storm. But you saw how they’re fairing in this crap. They’re getting stuck just as easily as the motorists they’re supposed to be assisting,” he said, referring to the IDOT truck he’d been trying to push out of the snow earlier with other members of his construction crew.
“You need to call for an ambulance. And Finn…you and your men need to find a way for it to get through. There’s a medical emergency.”
“Were you just saying all that stuff about the kid being okay to calm the mother down?” Finn asked intently.
Esa shook her head. “No. It’s not Scott who needs immediate medical attention. It’s his grandfather, Mr. Shore. I think he’s either had a heart attack or is in the process of having one as we speak. Thank God I have aspirin in my bag, but there’s not much else I can do except to keep his daughter from getting hysterical.”
“Don’t worry, Esa. We’ll get the ambulance through.”
She took reassurance from the steely fortitude of his tone. “Shore. Eli Shore. Tell them, there’s a small chance they’ll be able to pull up some records on him. And Finn, thank you,” she said earnestly before she opened the car door.
* * * * *
Finn watched as two EMTs lifted the stretcher with Mr. Shore on it into the back of the ambulance. His daughter followed with Scott in her arms. He still breathed heavily from the strenuous exercise he’d had in the past hour as he and twenty other members of his crew had pushed and harried the medical vehicle through the rapidly mounting snow. He’d agreed on the phone with both the dispatcher and the ambulance driver to meet the vehicle at the closest open ramp at 55th street.
They’d followed the ambulance in several pickup trucks, stopping to push the ambulance through the snow whenever it got stuck. After a grueling journey Finn and his crew finally got the ambulance to a point that was within a quarter mile of Toni Angstrom’s Oldsmobile—close enough for the EMTs to walk to retrieve Mr. Shore and also in a place that the driver could turn the vehicle around.
Finn turned when he felt a hand on his back.
“Jeez, your shirt is damp. And it’s not from the snow, is it?”
He studied Esa’s pale, drawn features through the snow that fell heavily between them. He’d been grateful as hell to hear her confident voice earlier, and not just because she was a doctor who undoubtedly could handle the distraught mother better than he could.
He’d been happy as hell because it’d been her. Period. He’d missed her like crazy over the past two weeks. And his desire to see her again hadn’t faded like it should have if she was just some passing affair. It had grown until it became an annoying ache in his gut that wouldn’t be quieted no matter what he did.
Despite his stupidity on Halloween, tonight the truth had struck him full force as he’d watched her handle the hysterical mother and wailing child like a pro. The idea of her being a physician seemed just as natural and right as the idea of her being a libertine publisher of a singles’ magazine had always seemed somehow wrong.
He burned with curiosity. Why the hell had she lied to him?
“It’s sweat,” he answered Esa’s question after a moment. “The ambulance got stuck five times.”
She sighed shakily. “At least Mr. Shore is better off in that ambulance than in his daughter’s car. Although I have to admit, he looked a heck of a lot better by the time the EMTs came for him. His color was improving and he was breathing more easily. Maybe it wasn’t a bad heart attack. The aspirin seemed to help. I just hope the damage to his heart isn’t extensive.”
She bit her lip in obvious concern as she watched the EMT close the ambulance doors. “Scott’s fever went down a little bit with the acetaminophen, as well,” she added. He was taking liquid and resting quietly by the time the EMTs came.
“They were lucky to have a doctor there.”
Her eyes leapt up to his face. The moment stretched taut as they stared at each other.
“Why?” he whispered hoarsely. “Why the hell did you lie to me?”
She shook her head and glanced away. “You thought I was someone else from the beginning. You saw what you wanted. You wanted me to be some kind of frivolous, casual fling. So I—”
“Gave me what you thought I wanted, like a good little actress?”
Her chin went up defensively. Her brandy-colored eyes flashed fire behind her glasses. “I gave you what you did want. Don’t tell me you’re going to deny it now.”
“I don’t deny that I wanted you but I would have appreciated not being lied to.”
As soon as the heated wo
rds left his mouth, however, Finn wondered. Was he being as dishonest as Esa had been? Could he truthfully say that he’d been interested in anything more than a night of hot sex with a gorgeous woman that night at One Life? Would it really have mattered if she was the publisher of a singles’ magazine, a waitress, a lawyer or a doctor? He immediately knew the answer to that.
Hell no. He’d wanted Esa. He’d wanted her naked, warm and willing in his bed. Maybe it’d been easier to propose sex on the spot believing she was a player but it didn’t change the fact that he would have been wild to have her even if she were studying to become a nun.
He frowned when someone called out his name.
“I have to go. The ambulance needs an escort back to the ramp,” he said.
Her face fell. “Oh, of course.”
He dug in his jeans pocket and extracted his keys. He grabbed her chilled hand and wrapped it around them.
“The snow is letting up some. With some luck I’ll be back in a little over an hour. These are the keys to the trailer. There’s a bathroom there and a portable heater next to the desk. You’ll be more comfortable there than in your car. Will you wait for me until I get back?” he asked intently.
Something hitched in his chest cavity when he saw the uncertainty on Esa’s pretty face. “I made a mistake, Esa. Don’t run again. There’s nowhere to go this time.”
She laughed softly when she glanced back and saw what looked like a massive parking lot instead of an interstate.
“Okay, I’ll wait. I promise.”
Relief coursed through him. He put his hand on her back. “Come on, then. The trailer is about a quarter mile up the road. I’ll drop you off in the truck on the way.”
Chapter Nineteen
Esa stood quickly when the door to the trailer opened an hour and a half later and Finn clambered up the steps, snow flurrying around him as he entered. The wind howled outside, catching the trailer door and flinging it wide. He shut it forcefully behind him and locked it into place before he staggered into the cluttered room. She not only saw him shivering but actually felt the cold coming off his body when he came closer.
“God, you’re freezing,” she said as she inspected his rigid features. She saw through the dim light provided by the gas heater that crystals of ice had frozen on his eyebrows and the dark gold whiskers on his angular jaw. He leaned over and held his hands to the heat appreciatively.
“The ambulance only got stuck twice. Didn’t have as much of an opportunity to work up a sweat this time. We saw some Red Cross volunteers setting up shop along the way. You can get a free cup of coffee if you walk down a half mile.”
Esa laughed ruefully. “Great. Just what people need.”
He cast an amused glance her way. “Better than nothing, I guess. We’re in it for the long haul. The Chicago Transit Authority officials are stopping people from trying to get on the ‘L’. I’m betting that IDOT or the Illinois State Police are behind it. Getting the roads cleared is going to be impossible if everyone abandons their vehicle.”
Esa shook her head incredulously. “New definition of a traffic nightmare.”
“It’s not all bad.”
Esa met his gaze. “What do you mean?”
“At least the storm made it possible for me to see you again.”
Esa looked away, unsure how to interpret his expression and tone. Wasn’t he still angry at her for lying to him? And if so, wasn’t it starkly at odds with the heat in his blue eyes?
“It wasn’t so bad waiting. I found a copy of Metro Sexy on the desk and read it cover to cover. You know what?” she asked, striving for a light tone in her increasing anxiety about being alone with Finn. “I’ve been maligning my little sister. It’s really a good magazine. Another thing I realized while you were gone. I understand now why your condo is so neat. Apparently this trailer is the place where you can express your slovenliness at full volume.”
Finn straightened and glanced around the dim nine-by-fifteen-foot room. Over half of the floor space was covered by tables stacked high with files, tubes of blueprints and paper.
“This trailer has been like this for as long as I can remember. I didn’t have the heart to change it after Dad died.”
She looked up into his shadowed, handsome face. The ice crystals in his whiskers had started to melt in the warmth generated by the portable heater. It suddenly struck her how small the space seemed with Finn it, how dim the lighting was, how intimate it seemed.
She cleared her throat uncomfortably.
“I’m glad I ran into you tonight,” she said.
His eyebrows went up. “You are?”
She nodded. “I never really got to tell you why I misrepresented myself to you. Do you want me to try and explain more fully?”
He examined her before he nodded slowly. “Yeah. Yeah I do. But hold on just a second…”
He went around to the front of the ancient, sturdy wooden desk and opened one of the drawers. He pulled a bottle of liquor out and hooked his finger in the handle of an empty coffee cup on his desk. The wheels of the chair that he rolled into position next to Esa clacked loudly on the tile flooring. He poured two fingers of the amber liquid from the bottle into the glass and handed it to her.
“What’s this for? Courage?” she asked, her lips curving in amusement even as nervousness made her voice tremble slightly.
“If that’s what you need it for,” he said softly. “Personally, I need it to thaw out.”
Esa smiled at him and was heartened to see that he returned it. The whiskey scored her throat as it went down but it didn’t warm her anywhere near the way Finn’s steady gaze did.
The words started to pour out of her mouth as though they’d been crowding eagerly on the back of her tongue for weeks now—which they had, she supposed. He never spoke, only listened with focused attention and took a sip of whiskey now and again.
“Finn, I want you to know that I absolutely forbade my sister Rachel to print anything in Metro Sexy about Julia and you,” Esa said passionately once she’d reached the end of her story. “I don’t know how Julia got her information but she was mistaken. Rachel would never have run that story in her column once I specifically asked her not to. Rachel may have her faults but she and I are very loyal to one another.”
Finn stared thoughtfully at the flickering blue flames at the bottom of the gas heater. After a moment he roused himself, running his long fingers through his wind-tousled hair.
“I know it,” he said.
Esa’s eyebrows went up in surprise at the matter-of-factness of his statement. He gave a small smile and shrugged.
“I overheard part of your conversation with her on Halloween in my mom’s kitchen. I’d been calling Rachel all week long, hadn’t I?”
Esa nodded.
“I didn’t get it at the time I heard the two of you talking but now that I know the truth it all makes sense. You were scolding her into not running the story.” His small smile faded as she continued so study her in the fire-lit room.
“What I don’t get is why you felt compelled to continue to lie to me about your identity after my initial error in calling you ‘Kitten’.”
Heat rushed into her cheeks. She looked into the fire to avoid his piercing stare. “It was stupid, I know… An impulsive, spur-of-the moment decision. Carla and Kitten—Rachel, I mean—had been getting on me recently for being so boring and lame. I’d started to realize they might have a point. I specialize in the care of older adults. I really enjoy spending time with my patients but lately I’d begun to realize that I’d been hanging around them so much in my free time because they were…I don’t know. Safe? Nonthreatening companions for someone who had been burned in the romance department a few times too many and was going into early retirement?”
“And the night at One Life? What made you decide to take a walk on the wild side?” Finn asked gruffly.
“You did. I-I wanted you so much that I was willing to do anything, including pretending to be something t
hat I thought you wanted—just so that I could be with you.”
She’d spoken so softly that for a moment, when he didn’t move or speak, she’d thought he hadn’t heard her. The thought of having to repeat such an intimate confession made her panic momentarily.
But then she glanced up cautiously into his gleaming eyes and she knew.
He’d heard her.
He set the cup down on the desk and turned back to her. “Come here,” he said, his voice rough and gentle at once as he reached for her hands. Esa’s mouth still hung open in pleasant surprise by the time he pulled her into his lap and burrowed his long fingers through her hair. The whiskey and the gas heater had chased the chill out of him. He felt hard and warm beneath her bottom and thighs.
She moaned softly when he tightened his hold in her hair, bringing her mouth to his. He kissed her hard and masterfully, as though he wanted to stamp her with himself, stake some kind of primitive claim on her. Once she’d melted into him however, he softened his manner, lightly caressing her jaw and neck while his tongue plundered her mouth and his lips shaped and sipped at her own in a sinuous, erotic caress.
Esa’s body seemed to erupt with heat as she luxuriated in Finn’s taste, scent and touch. She’d missed him so much. It had been a constant pain that grew more and more sensitive over the last two weeks, every time the thought struck her that she’d likely never see him again.
A powerful need swamped her. She was distantly aware that not only did she claw at the buttons of his insulated shirt, his hands had also lowered and were hastily unfastening her blouse.
They broke apart a few seconds later and swiftly pulled the sleeves off each other’s arms.
“I want you so much,” Esa mumbled unevenly.
“I told myself it was best to forget you,” Finn whispered next to her lips. “You were supposed to be a rebound fling. I tried like crazy to stop thinking about you but I couldn’t. God, I’ve never known a woman who smelled half as good as you.”
Her head fell back, giving his talented mouth full access. She shivered in excitement when he traced her spine with his warm fingertips and opened his hand over her waist. “Or who felt half so soft,” he added between hot kisses on the front of her throat and chest.