Before It Stains

by R. E. Bradshaw

  Mo wrote bits and pieces of screenplays all the time. Her documents folder was full of story ideas and half-written projects. Stephanie read the ones Mo showed her, giving opinions and support. It never bothered her that Mo wrote about fictional women having sex and running amuck, but then she’d never read this particular storyline. In light of recent events and the date on the document, indicating it was written in July, the writing rang more true than fiction. Not only had Mo cheated on her, now she was fantasizing and writing about it.

  The text notification sounded from her phone. Stephanie picked it up and slid her finger across the screen. Texts from Mo popped up. There had been several throughout the day. Stephanie went straight to the last one.

  It read, “I’m coming home.”

  Over the last few days, Stephanie attempted to let go of her anger. The harder she tried the more furious she became. Tonight, with no one around to focus her energy elsewhere, the malice grew to the point of no return. For the last several hours, she’d had nothing to do but plot her revenge. Stephanie was consumed by hurt and betrayal. The payback was going to be a bitch. One small part of Stephanie’s mind warned her not to go too far. There was an invisible line she had yet to cross. There were words that could be said that once they were spoken, they could never be taken back. She skittered to the edge, her toes just on the line.

  Stephanie looked back up at the word document. She copied the paragraph into an email message and sent it to Mo’s cell. Picking up her phone again, she typed a text message back to Mo.

  “Read your email. And by the way, you’ll be needing that hotel key.”

  Stephanie went back to the computer. She closed the file and looked again at the folder names. She saw one labeled, “Colt 16.” She clicked on it and found it contained other folders with pictures, videos, and a movie project file. Mo must have made a movie for Colt’s sixteenth birthday party. She opened the movie project, pushing play when the window popped up.

  Elton John’s “Circle of Life” came through the speakers, as Colt’s life unfolded on the screen. It began with pictures of the young and in love, Stephanie and Mo. They beamed back at the camera from multiple poses. Soon the images were of Stephanie in various stages of pregnancy and finally in the hospital, where a grinning Mo held Colt to Stephanie’s chest, moments after he was born. The rest of the video chronicled Colt’s life in pictures and video clips of his friends and family, the activities he loved most, the vacations they took, his whole young existence on film. Throughout the movie, they looked like the perfect family.

  Stephanie exported the video to email and sent it to Mo with the subject line, “She did ruin everything.”

  Stephanie stood up, left the pile from Mo’s desk drawers in the floor, and went in search of wine. She took her cellphone with her out of habit. On her way, she stopped to pick up the vase of roses, took them to the kitchen, and threw them in the trash. Still at the kitchen counter, after downing the first glass of wine in a hurry, she was pouring her second when the text notification played on her phone. Sliding her finger on the screen, the phone opened to Mo’s message.

  “Look all you want. I have nothing to hide. You know it all now. By the way, I did not write that paragraph. It was a student’s pitch exercise from summer school. Also, I was on a tour of the sound studio when you called. The assistant who answered the phone thought she was doing me a favor, because she knew I was expecting a call. Believe me or not, it makes no difference. I never wanted anyone but you. I’m done talking to you through messages. I’m coming home so I can talk to you face to face. You’re going to listen to what I have to say. Then if we’re done, you make the call. I’m not the one walking away, you are.”

  Stephanie drank from the glass and contemplated her reply. She sipped and seethed. How dare Mo turn this on her, as if it were Stephanie’s fault they were in this mess? She set the glass down and typed.

  “Watch me walk.”

  CHAPTER TEN

  Stephanie spent the night on the couch. She watched old movies until she finally fell asleep near dawn. She woke just in time to shower and meet Randy for breakfast. She drug through the morning, barely enjoying spending way too much on new shoes and a daring black dress that Randy said was “sex in crepe.” He complained about her lack of enthusiasm, until she explained the interaction with Mo and not getting much sleep. He dropped her off at her car just after noon.

  “Steph, honey, go home and take a nap. We’re going to have a marvelous time tonight. You can’t be rocking a dress like that with bags under your eyes.”

  Stephanie got out and stood by the car door. “I’ll be all right. Mom is picking up Colt in a few hours. I’ll lie down after he leaves. Don’t worry; I’ll look good on your arm. I’m looking forward to going out as a free woman for the first time in seventeen years.”

  Randy’s smile slipped a little. “Sounds like you’ve made up your mind. When is Mo getting here?”

  “I don’t know. I didn’t ask.”

  Randy leaned a bit farther over, so he could see her face better. “What if she comes home before you leave tonight?”

  Stephanie smirked. “Guess she’ll have to go back to her hotel and wait until I feel like talking to her.”

  “Yeah, like she’s going to watch you walk out the door in that dress.” Randy chuckled. “I see a massive lesbian drama about to unfold before me. It’s like watching a train wreck. I can’t avert my eyes.”

  Stephanie leaned in and kissed him on the cheek. “You just be there at seven and don’t be late. If she does show up, I’d hate to ruin a good parting line by not having a car waiting for my escape.”

  “Oh girl, you know I’ll be there on time. I’m going to be filming this exit, you can bet your sweet ass on that one.”

  #

  Stephanie picked Colt up and stopped to get sub sandwiches on the way home. She was starving and, even though he had already eaten lunch, Colt was still hungry. After a quick lunch, Stephanie washed his uniform and other funky things from his gym bag. Colt only raised an eyebrow when he saw her unzip the dress from the hanging bag and walk upstairs with it. Stephanie hung the dress on the bathroom door and went back down to spend time with Colt in the den. He was lounging on the couch, watching ESPN. He leaned up on one elbow when she sat down in the easy chair next to the couch.

  “Is that dress for tonight?” he asked.

  “Yes, do you like it?”

  “New hair, new dress - What’s up, Mom?”

  Stephanie dodged the truth. “Just wanted a different look and I haven’t had a new dress like that in years - well, ever.”

  Stephanie waited for his questioning to continue. He was too smart not to know something was not quite right around the household. She held her breath, hoping he would not ask what she feared most - When is Mo coming home? She didn’t want to be the one to tell him never. Colt sat up and turned the TV down.

  “I have to ask you something,” he said.

  Here it comes, Stephanie thought. She swallowed hard and said, “Okay.”

  “Mo and I talked this morning. She said I had to ask you, so here goes.”

  Great! Mo was dumping this on Stephanie too.

  Stephanie stopped him from continuing with a hand up in the air, saying, “Honey, Mo should be here too. I shouldn’t be the one to tell you what happened, but I guess she’s too much of a coward to even do that.”

  Colt’s eyes widened. In his whole life, he never heard Stephanie speak of Mo that way. Stephanie was pretty sure he’d never heard more than a smart remark between them, and that she explained once he was old enough to understand PMS. She thought it only fair for the lone male in the house to be forewarned when the females were hormonal.

  “I’m sorry, Colt,” Stephanie said, moving to slide in next to him on the couch. “I’m just so mad at her right now. Just remember we both love you and nothing will change that.”

  Colt’s Adam’s apple bobbed with a swallow. His voice was dry, almost a whisper, when
he said, “Okay.”

  Stephanie took a deep breath and began the dismantling of her son’s perception of the world.

  “I wish I knew how to tell you this, so it wouldn’t hurt, but it’s going to. Promise me you’ll talk to me. Don’t hold it in. It will just make it worse. Promise me.”

  Colt stared at her, his brow wrinkling, eyes pinching together. He picked up this quizzical puppy expression from Mo. It amazed Stephanie the number of mannerisms he adopted from each of them. He was truly their child. It went way beyond genetics. Colt only nodded his head in agreement, unable it seemed, to speak.

  “All right then, I’m not going to sugarcoat this.” She hesitated and then blurted out, “Mo had an affair, and I asked her to leave.”

  Colt’s expression went from questioning to total confusion. He regained the ability to speak, but not his ability to censor his language in front of his mother.

  “What the fuck!”

  Stephanie’s reaction was automatic. “Hey, watch your mouth.”

  At that moment, they both heard the front door open. Stephanie’s heart leapt into her throat. She wasn’t ready to face Mo and she had a confused teenager to deal with. This wasn’t going well at all. She and Colt turned toward the archway leading to the foyer. Stephanie realized Colt was frozen too, anticipating Mo’s entrance. Huge sighs of relief escaped them when Stephanie’s mother’s voice cut through the air.

  “Hey, where are you two?”

  Stephanie called out, “In the den.”

  She looked at Colt, who was now searching her eyes for answers to the questions flooding his young mind. Stephanie could only imagine what he must be thinking and her eyes began to fill with tears. Debra Austin made her entrance, noticing right away that something was most definitely wrong.

  “What’s going on in here?”

  Stephanie turned to her mother. “Mo told him to ask me what happened and I had to tell him.”

  Debra plopped down in the chair across from Stephanie. She looked on her grandson with compassion. “I’m so sorry, honey. I was hoping they’d leave you out of this.”

  “I can’t believe she made him ask me.” Stephanie said, defending herself.

  Colt startled both women, when he said, “She didn’t.”

  Stephanie faced Colton. Now, she was the one with the confused look. “What?”

  “She didn’t tell me to ask you about that. I was going to ask you if I could have a Dodge Charger for my birthday.”

  Debra fell back against the chair. “Oh, good Lord!”

  Stephanie stared slack-jawed at Colt, stricken with the knowledge of what she had done.

  Colt hurried with the rest of his explanation. “Mo said she got some money and that I could have a car for my birthday. But I had to ask you about the Charger, because she said you might not want me to have such a powerful car to start with.”

  “Why didn’t you stop me?” Stephanie asked.

  “I didn’t know what you were going to say and once you got going, I didn’t know how to stop you.”

  Debra leaned forward again. “Exactly what did you tell him, Stephanie?”

  Colt flashed with anger. “She told me Mo cheated on her and she threw her out.” He turned back to Stephanie. “Why didn’t you tell me the truth when I was carrying those bags to the curb? That was Mo’s stuff you had hauled away.”

  Stephanie almost laughed. It was a nervous reaction she sometimes had to serious circumstances. “No, I did not throw Mo’s things away. Go look. Her stuff is still here.”

  Stephanie found herself on the defensive. Colt was angry with her. She hadn’t seen that coming. She assumed he would be mad at Mo for ruining their family. Somehow, he was more upset with Stephanie for throwing Mo out.

  “Is she coming back?” Colt asked, the tears welling in his eyes.

  Stephanie tried to soothe him. “Yes, honey. She’s coming back today.”

  “Here, she’s coming home? Why didn’t she tell me that this morning?”

  “She’s staying in a hotel, but yes, Mo will be in Durham sometime today or tonight. I’m not sure what time. She didn’t say. I assume she didn’t tell you, because she wanted to see me before she talked to you.”

  Colt stood up quickly. “And you’re going out with Randy, instead of talking to her. That says it all, doesn’t it?”

  Stephanie rose to face him. “I made these plans before Mo said she was coming home. I’m going to talk to her, Colt. Just on my terms, not hers.”

  Colt glared at her. “The new hair, the sexy dress, it all makes sense now. Are you already looking for a replacement?”

  Debra joined the standing pair. She stepped between them, facing Colt. Her voice was soft, but stern. “That’s enough, Colt. I know you're hurting, but your mother is hurting as well. Stop now, before either of you say something you can’t take back.”

  Colt huffed and left the room. Stephanie heard him running up the stairs to his room and then his door slammed.

  She turned to her mother. “Why is he so mad at me? Mo did this, not me.”

  “No one loves the messenger who brings bad news,” Debra quoted, adding, “You’re here, Mo’s not. Simple as that.”

  “I thought that’s what he wanted to know.” Stephanie fell back on the couch. “I sure screwed that up.”

  Debra sat down beside Stephanie. “Yep. You stepped in it, but good. Now what are you going to do?”

  “I guess I have to tell Mo he knows.”

  “What hotel is she staying in?” Debra asked.

  Stephanie shrugged. “I don’t know. I just told her to get a room. She’s not staying here.”

  “Made up your mind then?”

  Stephanie faced her mother. “I think so.”

  Debra patted Stephanie’s knee. “You better know so.” She stood up. “I’m going to take the irate teenager off your hands for the time being. Have some fun tonight and deal with Mo in the morning. We’ll see you at the game tomorrow night.”

  Stephanie rose from the couch. “I have to make sure he has everything he needs packed in his bag.” She went toward the stairs and hesitated.

  Debra volunteered, “I’ll go get him. He’s not mad at me.”

  Stephanie was relieved. She didn’t want to face another explosion from Colt right now. “I’ll get his uniform out of the dryer.”

  When she came out of the kitchen, Stephanie caught a glimpse of Colt disappearing into the foyer, and then heard the front door open and close.

  Her mother shrugged. “He’s hormonal. What are you going to do?”

  Stephanie handed over the gym bag, the contents all freshly laundered and folded.

  “And yet, he expected his uniform cleaned and handed to him,” Stephanie said.

  “He’s just like another teenager I knew once. Too mad to speak a civil word, but still eating the food I put on the table.”

  Stephanie couldn’t help but laugh. She knew she gave her parents hell for a while.

  “Guess it’s karma,” Stephanie replied. “Tell him I love him, if he ever calms down.”

  Her mother leaned in for a hug. “He’ll be all right. It’s the parents that barely survive the teenage years.”

  Stephanie hugged her mother tightly. “I love you, Mom.”

  Debra released Stephanie from the embrace. “I love you too, honey.”

  She turned toward the door, Stephanie following. Just before Debra’s hand found the handle she turned back to her daughter.

  “Listen to what she has to say, Stephanie. You be sure, before you tell that boy it’s over.”

  “I’m very conscious of how my decision will impact Colt, but I have to do what’s right for me too. Do you think he’ll ever understand that?”

  Debra’s smile softened. “In time.” She paused a moment, and then issued a gentle warning. “Don’t set your feet in concrete, until you are sure you can live with your decision. The rest of your life is a long time to be sorry.”

  Stephanie sounded more resolute than s
he actually was, when she replied, “If I end this marriage and regret it, I’ll have to learn to live with it, but I think I’ve earned the right to make that mistake.”

  Debra opened the door and stepped out on the porch. She turned back, imparting one last pearl of wisdom, “Don’t let your pride write a check your heart can’t pay for.”

  #

  Stephanie paced in the foyer. Occasionally, she would stop and check herself in the long mirror by the door. The soft, black, crepe-jersey fabric of the Narciso Rodriguez tank dress clung tightly to every curve of her body. The scooped-neck, cut out back, and long exposed zipper down to the hem, left more skin visible than Stephanie was usually comfortable with, but she had to admit it really was sexy. The extremely high heels of the new signature red soled Christian Louboutin, black platform pumps were taking some getting used to. She wore lacy black bikini panties, found in the back of her drawer during the cleaning frenzy a few nights ago. The tags were still there from when Mo gave them to her for Valentine’s Day, last year. Stephanie was proud to have managed styling her hair just as it was when she left the salon. She took extra pains with her makeup. She was wearing over two thousand of dollars worth of clothes and shoddy makeup would not do.

  Stephanie never spent that kind of money on herself, ever. It felt freeing to frivolously blow a chunk of Michaela’s daddy’s money on a dress and shoes. The Dior perfume was just icing on the cake. She looked wonderful, smelled delicious, and she knew it. That wasn’t what was driving her anxiety. Stephanie did not want to have a scene with Mo, not now. Maybe tomorrow, but tonight she just wanted to feel good about herself and forget about her troubles. She checked the time on her cellphone. It was 6:58. Stephanie turned the phone off and slid it into a small black clutch purse, taking one last look in the mirror. She was wearing the teardrop diamond earrings and matching necklace Mo and Colt gave her for Christmas, a few years ago. The only other jewelry she wore was her wedding rings. She looked at the rings, twisting the solitaire diamond around with her thumb, a habit of late.