She shuddered beneath his embrace and drew a shaky breath, then nodded her head. Pulling away so she could look up at him, she said, “It’s going to be all right. If she were a different blood type, it would be much easier. But it has to be O negative, and the hospital is very short on it – at crisis levels.”
She gestured with her head toward the hall, and they walked as she continued, “I got a lesson on blood types at the doctor’s. Caroline is O negative, which is a universal blood donor. Anyone can receive O negative, regardless of their own type, but for Caroline, she’s limited to only receive O negative.”
They arrived at her office and turned in. She walked behind her desk and sat and he sank into the chair facing it. “I have to find a donor, preferably in the next two or three days. If I do, they’ll reserve that blood for Caroline’s procedure.”
“Alyssa, I have something …,” he began but she seemed to be in her own world, and kept talking.
“I’ve called my parents, and they’re calling everyone they know. Everyone’s going to get their blood tested to see if they can donate.”
He began again, “Alyssa, listen ….”
“I did a sample myself, thinking that as her mother, I should be able to donate. But I’m the wrong type. Which means, according to the doc, that her father is the correct type. He has to be. Genetically, you know.” She looked up at him.
His heart pounded so hard he heard it in his ears. He’d suspected, but she’d confirmed it. He was the right type to donate. And of course, he would, to provide his daughter with what she needed. Now was the time to reveal his identity to Alyssa. He would tell her who he was, and she would be angry, sure. But it wasn’t important now – all that was important was helping Caroline.
“Alyssa, listen to me.”
She stopped talking and glanced his way. “What is it?”
“I have to tell you something that may not be easy to hear.” He shook his head, ran all ten fingers outstretched through his hair. He had to make her understand. “Back when Marguerite and I were on vacation in Hawaii, life was perfect. When she told me that day she was carrying our baby, I thought the world couldn’t get any better.”
She looked at him and gave him a sympathetic smile and a confused shake of her head.
“When that truck plowed into us, it left me paralyzed, but Marguerite died immediately – in the car, before the rescue help even got there. She died right before my eyes.” His breath hitched at the memory – however old, it never got any easier. Alyssa reached across her desk and laid her hand on his. “As I waited for help to arrive, knowing my wife was gone, I wondered if there was a chance in hell my baby would survive. Of course, it didn’t. The baby died along with Marguerite. That one moment in time changed my entire life, my entire future, for all time.”
Alyssa wiped a single tear from her eye. “I’m so sorry, Grant.”
He shook his head. “No, I don’t bring this up for you to feel sorry for me. I bring it up to tell you that I know the strong love of a parent for their child. And I know you will do anything to help Caroline. I will too, Alyssa.”
Alyssa nodded. “You’ve taken to Caroline so readily, and she’s crazy about you, Grant. When you’re not around, she asks about you. And when you are, her face shines with excitement over your attention.”
He swallowed. Years of secrets, hiding the truth, were now going to end. He drew a deep breath and continued.
“I went through months and months of treatment and therapy – both physical and emotional – to recover from that accident. Even after my body started to heal, my mental state was devastated. I was convinced that I would never find another woman I loved as much as Marguerite, and my hope and dream of children were ruined forever.
Alyssa sighed. “Grant, as much as I want to hear this -- sometime -- I have enough to deal with right now.”
It pained him to add to her burden, but coming clean was already past due. “Bear with me. One day about four years ago, I saw an old college buddy – Marcus. He had stopped into town for a meeting and he looked me up. We hadn’t seen each other since our college days. When I told him the turn my life had taken, he couldn’t believe it. He remembered something I’d long forgotten.”
“What was that?”
“Back when we were in college, we were really short on dough, and wanted to take a trip to a casino. We needed cash to do it. In the science building on campus, there was a flyer for a sperm donation clinic. All you had to do was go there, get your blood tested to make sure you were free of disease, fill out a questionnaire, sign a confidentiality clause, and leave the specimen. For that, they offered $200.”
She nodded. “Yes, I’m familiar with sperm donation clinics. As I told you, that’s how I happened to have Caroline. It’s a great option for single women who want a child and don’t have a steady man in their lives.”
“We did it. We went, made our donation, took our $200, and left.”
She shrugged. “I’m sure you made someone very happy.”
He paused. “After Marcus reminded me of that random act all those years ago, it got me thinking that despite the loss of Marguerite and my child, there was a chance that there was another child out there that I fathered.”
Alyssa frowned. She shook her head. “It doesn’t work that way, Grant. That confidentiality clause that you signed ensured that you would never get any information released to you about the woman who used your sperm. Clinics are very careful to never release information about the identity of the mother or the child. Although there may be a child who was created based on your donation, it is not your child, and you have no rights to it.”
He sat quiet. Of course, he knew the rules, but he also knew when you had the resources, there was a way around all the rules. Or at least most of them. He remembered the elation he felt that night sitting in the bar with his buddy Marcus, and the hope that was released in him that night, that maybe there would be meaning in his life again. He had immediately hired Tom as a private detective to penetrate the secrecy of the donation clinic and of course, he had ultimately come across Caroline’s identity as his own child.
Where there was a will, there was a way. Tom had helped him find the way.
“Well, …” he began.
“How’s it going?” Tony White stuck his head in the door, and took notice of Grant sitting there. He took a step into Alyssa’s office, his hand outstretched. “Grant.”
Grant stood and shook Tony’s hand. “Tony.”
Alyssa came around her desk. “Caroline needs a blood transfusion.”
Tony made a face. “And how are you doing, Mom?”
Alyssa shrugged. “At the moment I’m just trying to deal with the immediate problem of finding a donor for Caroline’s blood type. She’s got the rarest blood type – O negative.”
“I can get tested,” Tony said. “I have no idea what my blood type is, but if it’s what she needs, you are welcome to it.”
“Thank you, buddy.” Alyssa patted his shoulder.
“It won’t be necessary.” Both Alyssa and Tony turned toward him. His heart pounded under the sudden spotlight of their combined attention. He cleared his throat. “I’m O negative. I’ll do the donation.”
Alyssa beamed her happiness and ran toward him. “Grant! You’re serious? You’re O negative?” She put her hands on each of his cheeks and pulled him in for a kiss. He closed his eyes and soaked in the warmth of her lips on his, his heart pounding with the joy over his ability to help his daughter recover, and the shame of the secret he still hadn’t shared with Alyssa.
She pulled away and darted back to her desk. “We’ll go right now to the hospital. You need to pass the American Red Cross’s criteria for blood donors – they’ll do a test to make sure you’re okay.”
He shifted his gaze over to Tony, who stood carefully studying him. He nodded at Tony, but the other man did not move his attention away.
“You’ve been healthy, right? No illnesses lately? No medications?�
��
“Sure. Healthy as a horse.” He moved his lips into a grim smile.
“Fantastic! Let’s go!” She clutched her purse and briefcase under her arm, grabbed her coat off the rack on the way out the door and dashed out of the office.
Tony and Grant headed toward the door and both stopped. Tony looked at him for a long moment, then made an “after you” gesture with his hand. Grant walked through the doorway and headed down the hall after Alyssa.
* * * *
Alyssa sat in the waiting room at the hospital, trying to concentrate on the magazine open on her lap. Try as she might to focus on Hollywood diet tips and which celebrity was dating whom, it was no use. Grant had gone into an examining room with a nurse to be tested, and if he was indeed O negative blood type and if he passed the Red Cross’s donor requirements, her search was over. She’d have the blood for Caroline’s transfusion and her daughter could hopefully stop the terrible nosebleeds and bruising she’d endured the last few weeks. Unpredictable, unstoppable – they terrified Caroline, reducing her to a bundle of nerves and erratic tears. If she needed this transfusion to get her life – and her health – back to normal, they would do it.
The door opened and Grant walked out, his shirtsleeve rolled up and a bulky gauze pad taped to the bend in his arm. The nurse followed along behind him and approached Alyssa.
“If you’d like to wait, we should have the results back in about ten minutes.”
“Yes, please.”
The nurse nodded and left. Alyssa let her eyes fall on his arm. “Thanks for doing this.”
He sat in the chair beside her and took both her hands in his. “I want to help Caroline. Looks like I’m uniquely suited to do it. Don’t thank me.”
She took a deep breath and let it out a little at a time. “I hope you’re right.”
He squeezed. “No need to hope. I’m positive I’m the blood type Caroline needs, and I have no doubt I meet the standards required. Don’t worry.”
She smiled, her heart jumping at the possibility. “I just want this to be over. It’s been very scary for her, such a little girl. She’ll be sitting there at school, or in gym, or at a friend’s house and all of a sudden, there’s blood gushing uncontrollably out of her nose. Not cool.”
He nodded. “We’ll get her the transfusion and pray that it’s over.”
She wished she had his confidence. But until she heard it straight from the nurse’s or doctor’s mouth, she would still have a little doubt.
“Alyssa, there’s something I need to tell you. It has to do with Caroline and her blood type. And mine.”
She could see the tension in his forehead, the seriousness in his eyes. “Yes?”
“You said that because Caroline has an O type, and you have a different type, her father has to be an O type.”
Alyssa nodded. But whatever he was about to say was lost when the nurse strode up to them both, waving a folder. “He’s a match! He’ll be Caroline’s donor!”
“Oh, thank God!” Alyssa jumped to her feet. She held her hand out to the nurse, but the nurse grabbed it and pulled her into a hug.
“I know this is a huge relief for you. I monitored the test results myself. I was so happy when we got the green light. Congratulations.” The nurse turned to Grant who was coming to his feet, slowly. “And thank you very much.”
They shook hands. She turned back to Alyssa and handed her a card. “Call this number for scheduling the transfusion. Mr. Fontaine will need to arrive at the hospital at the same time as Caroline for the blood drawing.”
He nodded his understanding.
“And this is for you.” She handed him a sheet of paper with the hospital’s insignia in the corner. “This is some documentation that you need to bring with you the day of the procedure.” With a wink, the nurse left.
Before she knew it, Grant had pulled her into his arms and she was enveloped in his warm embrace. She inhaled and detected the spice and leather cologne that she associated with him and only him.
“She’s going to be fine,” he murmured against her ear. He planted a kiss on the top of her head.
She pulled away so she could gaze into his eyes. “I owe you so much. How can I thank you?”
He shook his head. “Don’t thank me.”
“Why not? I had this horrific problem on my hands and you swooped in like a knight in shining armor and rescued the damsel in distress.” She chuckled. “You’re my hero.”
She leaned in to kiss him. He responded tentatively at first, then warmed to her as she deepened the kiss, hoping to show him with her actions just how grateful and happy she was that he would be the donor she needed so badly.
She pulled back. “Let’s celebrate.”
He raised an eyebrow.
“Do you think we can find a bottle of champagne anywhere this time of day? I’d like to make a toast.”
He raised one corner of his mouth in a crooked grin. “I still have that bottle they gave us at the Big Shark Client dinner.”
Alyssa smiled. “Chilled?”
“Sure. It’s been in the fridge since that night.”
She nodded. “Somehow, that seems appropriate to me. We’ve come so far since that night, both professionally and personally. Now you’re helping to save my daughter’s life.”
He suddenly gripped her hands and stared into her eyes. “Don’t make me out to be a hero, Alyssa.”
She frowned. “Why not?”
He took a breath. “Because I need to tell you a little background about myself so you know the whole picture.”
She shook her head. “Nothing you can tell me now will change the fact that you are Caroline’s savior, that you are supportive of her, and she is crazy about you. What can you tell me that will change that?”
He was quiet, then looked away. “I love her.”
Alyssa felt a shudder slip through her. This man who had swept into her life like a whirlwind and turned it upside down, was professing his love for her daughter. She knew Caroline was fond of him, too. That was obvious every time they were together.
There were a million reasons she should not have fallen for Grant Fontaine. She’d played them over and over in her head a million times, and she’d always listened to her own reason before. But this man, in particular, was her downfall. She couldn’t resist him. For weeks she’d recognized the feelings in her own heart, no matter how unadvised, but she’d pushed them aside. Now, hearing Grant profess his love for her daughter made her realize that this wasn’t a passing fancy.
She was in love with Grant Fontaine. She couldn’t deny it.
The mood had grown so heavy, and she determined to lighten it. “How about that champagne?”
“But I …,” he began.
She stopped him with a chaste kiss on his lips. “Later. I want to celebrate.”
He studied her face, and she detected warring emotions playing under the surface of his eyes. Finally, he nodded. “Let’s go.”
Chapter Fourteen
On the drive back to his penthouse, Grant had too many thoughts whirring through his brain to keep up his side of the conversation with Alyssa. She was happy, relieved, thrilled, that he was deemed eligible to be Caroline’s blood donor. Of course she was. But it wasn’t quite as serendipitous as she was thinking. For her to realize that … of course he was eligible … he would have to tell her the whole story.
And with the telling, he could ax-murder her happiness. And her good will. And, quite possibly, her feelings for him.
Which would leave him devastated. Because, although he’d gone into this whole ill-advised charade to get close to the prize – his daughter, Caroline – over the last months he’d discovered his love for Caroline’s mother.
When Alyssa had moved from the background of Tom’s private investigations, to a real, live flesh-and-blood woman, he’d seen her for the strong, vibrant, accomplished woman she really was. So different from Marguerite. And yet, he’d fallen in love with her. He was never so certain of anyth
ing than he was about that.
He had fallen in love with both Alyssa and Caroline at the same time. He couldn’t have one without the other. And this landmine of a secret he held tight to his chest could mean the end of his relationship with both of them.
He glanced over at Alyssa in the passenger seat. Her smile for him made his heart hurt. He didn’t want to hurt her. God, he’d avoid that with all his being. But he had to do it. He had to come clean and tell her about their connection. Even if it killed her … and him in the telling of it.
“You’re awful quiet.”
He looked back at the road. “Sorry. Just concentrating on the traffic.”
They reached his building and got out of the car. He tossed the keys to the valet and they walked to the elevator. They stepped in and he used his private key to instruct the elevator to go straight to the top.
“This is a first,” she said.
“What?”
“You’ve never invited me to your place before.”
He chuckled uncomfortably. “Oh, yeah.”
There was a very good reason for that. But recently he’d swept the place clean of all traces of Tom’s investigations of Caroline over the years – none of the pictures he’d enlarged and framed and had sitting on his shelf remained. He’d put away the photo albums and scrap books containing articles about his anonymous donations that would occasionally hit the paper or school newsletter. Since he never had company over, he’d never worried that someone would see these things, and question them, or misinterpret them. But he wanted to have his two ladies over, so until the entire truth was out in the open – consequences be damned – he knew he had to clean the place up.
“You know how bachelors are. Dirty plates sitting around from a week ago. Empty beer bottles. Half-eaten slice of pizza in the couch cushions.”
She scoffed. “Somehow, I don’t see any of that being true in your case.”
He smiled. The elevator door swung open and they walked out into his private foyer. He unlocked the front door and stepped back so she could walk in ahead of him.
She slowed her step as she took in the interior. “Oh Grant, it’s gorgeous.”
Hidden Agenda Page 15