“‘Julie’ is fine. So, listen. Tomorrow I’ll take you to school because I have to register you. But after that . . . I have kids in three different levels of school, and I can’t drive everybody everywhere, so I take the youngest ones to elementary. So you’ll have a bus pass, and I’m trusting you to get there on your own. I know that might seem like a burden . . .”
“No,” Allie said. “It’s fine.”
“Oh.” Julie seemed surprised. “Good. Thank you for that positive attitude. A lot of the kids I’ve taken in over the years are used to being driven everywhere, and they’re insulted at the idea.”
“I just appreciate how you’re letting me live here.”
Julie looked up into Allie’s face. Almost right into her eyes, but Allie cut her own gaze away in embarrassment. “You hungry?” Julie asked, without addressing the weightier topics of gratitude and desperation.
“Starving. I’ve barely been getting food because there’s so much I don’t eat.”
“Right. Ms. Manheim told me about that. I have some Cuban black beans and rice if that sounds good. I hope brown rice is okay.”
“It’s . . . perfect,” Allie said, feeling the beginning of prickly tears. “Thank you.”
Allie lay in her single bed in the dark, most definitely not asleep. She had no idea if her new roommate, who was only ten, was sleeping or not. Based on sounds and breathing, Allie guessed not.
“What happened to the girl who had this bed before me?” Allie asked. Her voice was just a whisper. If the little girl was sleeping, Allie didn’t want to wake her.
“She got to go home.”
“Oh,” Allie said. “That’s good. I hope I get to go home sometime soon.”
“I hope you do, too.”
“That’s sweet. Thank you.”
“If you go home I get this room to myself again.”
“Oh. Okay. Less sweet. But I get it. Sorry you have to share.”
“It’s not your fault,” the little girl said. “I know you wouldn’t be here if you had anyplace else to be.”
“You can say that again.”
“I know you wouldn’t be here if you had anyplace else to be,” the girl repeated.
Allie had no idea if it was her idea of a joke, or if she didn’t understand the rhetorical nature of the phrase “You can say that again.” Or maybe the younger girl simply had no sense of irony whatsoever.
On her second morning in the new place, Allie trudged in the direction of the bus stop. She wore her favorite jeans and her best summer-weather shirt, untucked just the way she liked it. She carried an empty backpack—at least, empty except for a brown-bag lunch Allie actually could eat. Julie had said the pack would be filled with books by the end of the day.
It all seemed like a waste to Allie. Eight more days. By the time she felt even halfway caught up with schoolwork, she’d be on summer vacation.
“Need a ride?”
Allie whipped her head around to see a familiar white van pull up to the curb near her left shoulder. She stopped in her tracks, stunned by the sudden familiarity of . . . well, everything.
“Bea. What are you doing here?”
“I don’t have to be here if you don’t want.” With that, the passenger window began to power up again.
“No, I want you here. Really. I was just asking.” The window stopped rising. “I just meant, like . . . how did you find me?”
“I followed you guys from the courthouse.”
Allie stood a moment, taking in the changes. Then she walked two steps to the van and hopped in.
Just like old times.
“She missed me,” Allie said, indicating the cat purring in her lap. “Ow! Phyllis! Ow!”
“Of course she did. Look out for the claws, though, when she’s been missing you.”
“Now you tell me. Why don’t you clip them?”
“If you’d ever tried to clip that cat’s claws, you wouldn’t ask.”
Allie took Julie’s hand-drawn map of the route to school out of her pocket and studied it closely. “I think you turn left at this next light. Why did you leave so fast?”
“Which time?”
“After court.”
“Oh. That. I was humiliated. That judge acted like he didn’t want to hear a word I was saying. He kept gaveling at me and telling me to stop talking.”
“He did that to me, too. I think it’s just how he is. Bea, turn! This is our turn!”
“Oh,” Bea said.
The tires squealed as she swung left.
“I wanted to hear what you said, though. Thanks for showing up in court.”
“Good. I care more about you than I do that damned judge. So if you wanted to hear what I had to say, that’ll do.”
When she dropped Allie off at school, Allie didn’t ask if Bea was sticking around. If she was planning to come back. If Allie should take the bus home, or if Bea was going to be there with a ride.
Or if Bea had just come around to say goodbye.
It wasn’t that she forgot to ask, either. More that she couldn’t bear to know.
Bea was there after school.
And the following morning.
And that afternoon.
And the morning after that.
Day after day she showed up and offered a ride, but they never discussed the ride after that. Life proceeded on a strict ride-by-ride basis.
Chapter Thirty-Three
The Epilogue-Like Part, Two Months Later, with Bathtubs
“I have a surprise for you,” Allie said, the moment she hopped into Bea’s van.
“Before or after I drop you off at the shelter?”
Allie had been volunteering three hours a day at a homeless shelter since school had let out for the summer. It hadn’t exactly been her idea. Volunteerism was encouraged in her foster home. But it hadn’t been a bad idea, either. Plus Bea had driven her there and back every time, which Allie thought was worth the price of admission in itself.
“Neither one,” Allie said. “We’re not even going there today. My last day there was yesterday.”
“Oh. You didn’t tell me. So where are we going?”
“My house. And you get to take a bath in a nice, deep tub. Just like you always wanted. Just like I promised you that day in Monterey.”
“Wait,” Bea said. But, paradoxically, she pulled away from the curb as she said it. “How are we supposed to get into your house?”
“Through the door. My mom is home!” Allie heard her own voice rise to an odd squeal as she said it. “My social worker was supposed to drive me there officially this afternoon. But Julie said this was okay. My mom got some kind of early release. My mom and dad found out it might take a year or more to get me back, even after they got out of jail. So my dad changed his story and put the whole thing on himself. Said my mom didn’t even know about the tax stuff. She’s been home a few days, but she had to get this hotshot lawyer. She had to have him to cut through some legal process to get custody again. Normally that can take months. Even years. You know. If a kid got pulled from a home because of abuse. But in this case it was pretty fast, because . . . you know. Money. And because legally she’s sort of . . . innocent now, all of a sudden. Like, wrongly convicted. I don’t know. It was all very strange.”
Allie stopped to pull a breath after all those words.
“So,” Bea said after a time, “you kept this from me because . . . ?”
“I only just found out that it worked. That the judge ruled in her favor. Besides. If I’d told you, it wouldn’t have been a surprise.”
“Right. Silly me. What about your dad?”
“He’s in for probably another two years at least.”
“Sorry to hear that. So . . . I hate to even ask this, but it seems to need asking. How does your mom feel about me coming in and taking a bath?”
“I guess we’re about to find out.”
Bea stepped on the brake too hard, and Allie lurched forward and hit the tether of her seat belt.
“You have
n’t even told her about me?”
“Relax, Bea. Trust me on this. I have everything under control.”
Before Allie could even open her mouth, her mom grabbed her in a bear hug. She seemed not to have noticed the older woman standing behind Allie on the porch. She seemed disinclined to let Allie go again.
In time her mom pulled back, her hands holding Allie’s face, and regarded her daughter closely. Allie studied her mother’s face in return. Her hair was cut strikingly short now, which felt like a shock. She seemed to have more lines in her forehead and around her eyes. And her eyes themselves looked different, though Allie could not have summed up in words exactly how they had changed.
And it was like a wonderful dream to see her again. And there were emotions surrounding it, big ones, but they all seemed to be hiding behind a wall where Allie couldn’t quite get to them. Maybe it would just take time.
“Mom,” Allie said, “this is Bea.”
Her mom raised her eyes and looked past Allie. Her face fell.
“Bea is going to come in and take a bath,” Allie added. “Okay?”
A silence, which only lasted a second or two, but felt heavy and wrong.
Allie reached back and took hold of Bea’s elbow. Together they marched into the foyer.
“Actually,” Allie said, “there’s more. Bea’s going to be living with us now. In the guest room. Bea, go out to the van and get the cat.”
“Wait,” Allie’s mother said. “Wait, wait, wait. You can’t bring a cat into this house.”
“Why can’t we?”
“Your father is allergic.”
“My father is in prison for two more years at least.”
“Right. And then he’ll be back. And he’s allergic to cats.”
“Mom. The cat is eighteen years old.”
“Oh.” And with that, her mom seemed to run out of steam.
Meanwhile Bea stood behind Allie on the Persian rug of the foyer, uncharacteristically silent.
“So, it’s all set. Bea and the cat will be living in the guest room.”
“Honey. Can I talk to you privately?”
“No. No, Mom. Anything you can say to me you can say in front of my grandmother.”
“Allie. Honey. I’m your mom. I know all your grandparents. Remember? If someone is your relative, I would know.”
“It doesn’t matter. It doesn’t make any difference, Mom. I don’t care that she’s not actually related to us. Look, I know I’m telling you how it’s going to be. Not exactly asking. But you fell out on me, Mom. I’m sorry, but I needed somebody and you weren’t there. And Bea was there. And she didn’t let me down, and I’m not letting her down now. So, Bea. Go get the cat.”
They all three stood a moment in that stunning silence.
Then Allie’s mom spoke up.
“Okay,” she said. “For right now at least . . . I guess . . . go get the cat.”
Allie lay on the guest room bed instead of her own, poking at the feeling of the familiarity of home. She almost might never have been gone. The whole last few months could have been a dream. But no, it couldn’t have been, because Allie was not the person who had lived here before. And in most respects that was good.
“So is that everything you ever wanted in a tub?” she asked when Bea stepped out of the guest bathroom.
“All that and more,” Bea said, toweling her hair dry. “In every way the bathtub of my dreams. Where’s your mom?”
“Downstairs in the living room. Crying. And being shocked. While you were taking your bath I told her the whole story. Everything that happened to me.”
“Oh,” Bea said. She set down the towel and perched on the edge of the guest bed, where Allie lay sprawled, petting the cat. “So . . . you honestly think she’s going to let me live here?”
“I think so. I’m not really giving her much choice. Not that I can force her, but . . . it’s just not something I’m going to back down on. And she feels so guilty. She owes me one. And she knows it. I think it’s going to be okay.”
Bea sat still a minute. Then she began swiveling her head. Looking all around the room. Even up at the ceiling.
“I didn’t really take all this in before. Because I didn’t believe I get to stay here. I’m still not sure. She’ll find a way to get me out.”
“Over my dead body,” Allie said.
Just before bedtime Allie’s mom came in and sat on the bed beside her.
Her mom opened her mouth to speak, then burst into tears again. For a moment she just sat and cried, and nothing was said.
Then she seemed to pull herself together some. At least enough to manage words.
“I am so, so sorry for what happened to you out there, Allie. And what could have happened. I know it’s not good enough to sit here and say it. But somehow I’m going to make it up to you. You watch. I’m not sure entirely how. But I will.”
“All you have to do is let Bea stay, and then we’re good.”
Unfortunately, her mom had no reply. So maybe Bea had been right after all.
Allie talked over the awkwardness of the moment.
“So, Mom. Two things I need to ask you. About my plans and all. When school starts again, I might be going around to some different schools in L.A. and doing some . . . talks. So other girls maybe don’t end up in that same kind of trouble. I don’t know how that’ll fit with my schoolwork. I don’t know a lot of things. I actually haven’t worked it out yet. Haven’t gotten like . . . official permission or anything. But I want to do it. And a cop told me I could do it. So I’ll do it. I just have to figure out the details.”
“I think that’s fine, honey. I like the idea. And I’ll help in any way I can. But what’s the other thing?”
“Oh, Right. Bea and I need to take a little trip sometime. It’s just like this loose end we want to tie up. We’re going to drive down the coast to the Mexican border. I mean . . . with your permission. Of course.”
Allie watched for a reaction. Her mom rocked back a little on the bed, but not much more. In the dim light from the hall, Allie couldn’t see the details of her mother’s expression.
“I don’t like the sound of that.”
“Why not?”
“Sometimes people go to Mexico for weird reasons.”
“We’re not going to Mexico. Just down to the border. We want to be able to say we saw the whole West Coast of the United States. We drove all the way up to the Puget Sound. And now if we just go from here to Mexico we will have seen the whole thing.”
“I don’t know, Allie. I have misgivings.”
“What kind of misgivings?”
“Like what if she has some illegal business in Mexico?”
“I told you. We’re not crossing the border.”
“But what if you get all the way down there, and it turns out you are but you didn’t know it?”
“She doesn’t even have a passport, Mom.”
For several moments, Allie lay on her bed in silence, trying to read her mother’s face in the dim light. Trying to find a way to turn this conversation in a better direction.
“If you’re so worried,” Allie said, “come with us.”
“Oh. I didn’t know I was invited.”
Another silence, during which Allie felt a softening of the energy between them. A lifting of tension.
“That would be nice, actually,” her mother added. “It might be kind of fun. Yeah. Let’s do that. Maybe next week. Meanwhile I have to ask you a question. And it’s important. So think before you answer. And please be honest with me. That story you told me . . . Where you were about to end up . . . That woman in the guest room, the one you’ve decided is your new grandmother . . . I mean, I know she gave you a ride and all. But did she have a big part in things not happening that way? As big as you made it sound?”
“Oh, definitely,” Allie said, not stopping to think as she had been instructed. “A huge part. She drove me out of there before the guy could get up and find me. And then she looked after me.
Jeez, without Bea . . . I hate to think.”
Allie thought she saw her mother sit up a little straighter, but it might have been her imagination.
“Okay. Okay then, honey. Then she’s welcome here.”
She kissed Allie on top of her head and slipped out of the room.
Allie waited a minute or two, then climbed out of bed and padded barefoot down the hall to the guest room. She knocked lightly on the door, opened it, and stuck her head into the darkened space.
“Bea,” she whispered. “You awake?”
“Yes. Why?”
“Welcome home,” Allie said. At a stronger volume.
Then she put herself back to bed.
ALLIE AND BEA BOOK CLUB QUESTIONS
1. At the beginning of the book Bea is called by a man who claims he is from the IRS. What painful choice is Bea forced to make after succumbing to this scam? Do you think she chose wisely?
2. After Bea takes to the road and starts living in her van, she quickly realizes she does not have the money to make it past the next few days. She makes the choice to steal a cell phone and pawn it. Are there some circumstances where breaking the law is justified? Is this one of them?
3. Allie and Bea perceive the world quite differently. In what ways do these views shift throughout the novel and become less black and white?
4. Allie’s childhood offered her everything money could buy, and yet circumstances left her just as homeless as Bea. In what ways did her parents’ drive for wealth lead to her situation?
5. Allie’s choice to be a vegan is based on her principles and beliefs, and she firmly adheres to them throughout most of the book. Do you agree with her choices despite her circumstances? Why do you think she stands so strongly by these ideals?
6. How does the kindness of strangers play a crucial part in both the outer and inner journeys of the main characters?
7. Allie suggests that they “just keep going” and turn their homeless plight into an adventure. How does this decision shape their overall outlook on life and help them both grow? Do you think putting a positive spin on a difficult situation can ultimately affect the outcome?
Allie and Bea : A Novel Page 30