by Sophie Stern
Pulling the door open, I smile.
“Hey Matt,” I greet the delivery guy. He’s a regular at the bar on his nights off. He also tends to bring in pizzas that are leftover after his shifts, so I’m a huge fan.
“What’s up, Meredith?” He grins. Matt is a tall, scrawny guy who’s barely old enough to drink. He’s got a mop of bleached-out hair and big green eyes. He’s the kind of kid high school cheerleaders fall all over themselves for. He’s got bad-boy-with-a-heart-of-gold written all over his smile.
“Not too much,” I say. He hands me my receipt. I add a tip, sign it, and hand it back over. “Busy night?”
He shrugs. “Not as busy as usual. There’s supposed to be a big storm tonight, so I think everyone’s just getting ready for that.”
“I didn’t know about that.”
Apparently, I’ve been preoccupied.
“Yeah, it’s supposed to be a shitty one,” he shrugs. “Make sure you have flashlights in your batteries, huh?”
“Yeah, okay.”
“Take care of yourself.”
“You too.”
He hands me the pizza and I close the door behind Matt before turning back around. Shit. A storm? I don’t have a lot of food on hand and everything’s already closed for the night, but surely one night of bad weather isn’t the end of the world. Besides, what’s the worst thing that could happen?
I walk over to the entrance to the living room and see Robert smiling at me from his position on the couch.
My heart does a flip-flop as I realize that yeah, I’m in big trouble. He might not be looking for something serious, but my inner-wolf is just begging to claim him as her mate.
Chapter 10
Robert
The pizza is good, and it disappears almost immediately. Meredith and I spend the entire night talking, laughing, and joking around. I talk almost too easily with her. There’s just something about her that makes me feel wildly comfortable and happy. By the time midnight rolls around, we’re nowhere near finished, but I know I should probably head home.
If I stay, I worry that I’m never going to leave.
“Well,” I say, and I place my hands on my knees, Midwest-style, to signify that the night is about over for me.
I don’t want it to be, and I think she can sense that.
“You don’t have to go,” Meredith says quickly.
“Meredith, I...”
“It’s okay. You don’t have to...I mean...nothing has to happen sexually,” she blurts out. She’s so nervous saying this to me that she blushes, but that just makes me like her even more.
“Meredith,” I cup her hand. “I appreciate that. I want you, baby,” I kiss her, pressing my lips to hers. “But I’m just not quite there. Not just yet.”
“It’s okay,” she says.
Neither one of us says what we’re really feeling. I can’t tell her that I’m dying to bite her, to claim her. I never felt that call with my ex-wife. In fact, I never believed in mates before. Not until I met Meredith. Now I can’t stop thinking about the idea of mates. Is Meredith my mate? Is that why I feel such a longing when I’m around her?
There’s certainly no logical reason for me to be feeling this way. There’s no realistic reason that I’m craving her so very badly.
“You can stay, though,” she says. “You know, Matt said there’s going to be a storm.”
And I walked.
It’s not too far to my home, but a quick listen lets me know that yeah, the storm has already begun, and I was too wrapped up in Meredith to notice or care. I get up and walk over to the window. Pulling the curtain back, I look out into the night just as thunder sounds, shaking the house. Meredith jolts, and I turn back to her.
“Sorry, I’m fine,” she says. “Just not a fan of storms.”
“They make you nervous.”
“A little.”
“Why?”
“The night my mom...well, there was a storm that night.”
“I see.”
Honestly, I really can’t walk back home in a storm. Not really. If I shift, I’ll be safe enough, but it’s still a bad decision. Meredith is scared, too. She says that she’s not, but hearing the thunder made her nervous and uncomfortable. Her heart is still racing. I can hear it.
Besides, I can smell her fear.
Even if she wasn’t the woman I believe to be my mate, could I really leave her to weather this storm alone? It seems cruel somehow.
“You don’t have to stay,” she whispers.
“I want to stay.”
“Nothing has to happen.”
“I want it to happen.”
“But you aren’t ready.”
“Not yet, Meredith, but it’s not because I don’t want you,” I whisper. I go to her. She’s sitting on the couch and I kneel in front of her and place my hands on her knees. Then I look up at her lovely face. She reaches for my hair and tousles it, touching me gently.
“Then what is it?”
“It’s because I want you too much.”
“Too much?” She laughs awkwardly. “Is that really a thing?”
So she feels it, too.
We both know it’s the wrong time. I’m new, and she’s got stuff she’s working through, and, well, neither one of us is looking for something super serious. That’s okay. Still, my inner-bear is clawing at me, dying to express how he feels.
“Do you believe in mates?”
“No.”
“Really?”
“Well...”
“A little, huh?”
“Maybe.”
“Have you ever been around someone whom you thought was your mate?”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean, have you ever been around someone who makes your inner-wolf feel like she’s going to crawl right out of you? Have you ever been around someone who makes you feel so safe and wonderful that nobody else could ever compare to them again?”
“Have I ever been around someone who makes my heart soar?”
“Yes.”
“Yes.”
“Is it me?”
I shouldn’t be asking her this because it’s a blunt question. If she says yes, I’m going to know I’m not crazy, and that maybe, just maybe, mates really do exist. Who would have thought I’d find love in a tiny little town like Claw Valley, though?
And who would have thought I’d find it with the little bartender?
She swallows hard and looks at me. Meredith is so damn brave. She’s not scared of anything. At least, she doesn’t let anyone see her fear.
When I look at her, she radiates courage. She’s been through so much, but she’s still fighting. She’s still working hard. She’s still pushing forward in a beautiful and wonderful way.
And she is so, so brave.
“Yes.”
The word hangs in the air, and my heart feels like it’s going to explode. I feel it and so does she.
“Robert, I’ve never felt anything like this before. Have you?”
“Never.”
“What about with your ex?”
“I never felt anything like this before.”
It’s not a lie and it’s not a line.
I’m being totally, completely truthful with Meredith right now. The reality is that this feeling, this draw? It’s kind of freaking me out. It’s making me nervous and scared and I feel more wound up than I ever have before.
“Me neither.”
“I’m scared,” I admit to her.
“Why?”
“It’s a strong emotion. I don’t want to screw it up. Besides, I have a lot going against me.”
“Because you’re new?”
“No offense to the citizens of Claw Valley, but people here aren’t exactly welcoming,” I tell her.
“I know,” she shakes her head. “And I’m sorry. After my mom died, well, people weren’t that friendly to begin with. It made things worse, though.”
“She must have been very well-loved in your town.”
&nb
sp; “She was totally adored,” Meredith says.
“I can’t imagine how hard that must have been to lose her.”
Meredith nods and looks around the room for a second. She takes a deep breath: her chest heaving. Then she speaks.
“I bought this place for her to grow old in, you know.”
“I didn’t know.”
“I thought that since my dad was gone, you know, that the two of us would have a lot of happy years here. It’s too big for me and sometimes, I feel like I’m going to suffocate in this place.”
“It was kind of you to buy it. I’m sure she loved it here.”
“She did. After she left me, though, it was hard to be home. I spent a lot of time at work. I spent way too much time with Foxy,” she rolls her eyes, and I can’t help but laugh at that. Foxy seems a little bit wild, but a little bit wonderful, too.
“And how are you doing now?”
“I have my good days and bad days.”
“Meredith, nobody ever really gets over a painful loss.”
“Like a death.”
“Or a marriage,” I tell her. “I don’t mourn for my ex-wife, but I still think of everything we lost. When you commit to someone in any way, whether it’s to a relative or a friendship or a marriage partner, and you lose that person, you usually lose a little bit of yourself, too.”
“That’s kind of sad.”
“It’s really sad,” I agree.
“So what do you do?” She whispers. She doesn’t sound jealous or upset about the fact that I brought up my ex. This makes me happy because as much as I don’t miss Karen, she was a big part of my life for a long time. Many of my past stories involve her. She was with me when I was in medical school and we had a lot of adventures together. As I move forward with Meredith, I’d like to be able to talk about my past.
I don’t want to have to censor out the stories where Karen was present or involved.
That’s just messy and sloppy.
No, I like the fact that with Meredith, I can be truthful. I like that she knows I was married before, but that she doesn’t really seem to care. That’s important because I don’t have contact with Karen in any way. We’re no longer involved. We don’t share children and no matter what happens going forward, I don’t have any reason to reach out to her.
“I take it one day at a time,” I tell her. “When I first got divorced, sometimes I had to take things one minute at a time.”
“That’s what I did after Mom died. Sometimes it hurt just to breathe. I had to take things in 10-second intervals.”
“And did that work?”
“I’m still here,” she whispers. “I guess it worked.”
“Loss is always messy.”
“So is grieving.”
“I’m sorry you went through this alone,” I tell her. I am, too. There’s a part of me that wishes I had been here with Meredith when her mom passed away. There’s a part of me that feels so very sad she was alone when she went through this.
I can’t change the past, but I can change the future, and right now? Right now, I want to make sure she has a wonderful future. I stand up and I take her hand. Tugging, I pull Meredith to her feet and plant a kiss on her forehead.
“Come on, little wolf. Let’s go to bed.”
Chapter 11
Meredith
By the time Robert and I reach my bedroom, I’m practically shaking with nervousness. I have no reason to be nervous around him. There’s literally nothing I have to be scared or uncomfortable about, but the idea of having him in my bedroom is just thrilling.
“You look nervous,” he smiles.
I push the door open to my bedroom and waltz on in ahead of him.
“About what?” I look back at him. “I don’t have anything to be nervous about.”
“That’s true. I’m very well-behaved,” he says, blinking innocently. “You don’t have to worry about me being a bad boy.”
“Too bad. Maybe I want you to be a bad boy.”
He smiles and kisses me on the forehead. Then we look at my bedroom together. It’s a small, cozy room with a big king-size bed in the center. There’s more than enough room for both of us, and I’d be lying if I said I didn’t choose this bed specifically because sometimes I sleep in wolf form. I don’t know if other shifters ever like sleeping in their animal form, but I do. There’s something really calming and wonderful about coming home from a long, relaxing run, showering, and then shifting into my animal form to just sleep.
Besides, sleeping in my wolf form is a great way to keep my heating bills down in the winter. I kind of love it.
“It’s cute.”
“Thanks. I designed it myself.”
I strip out of my clothes and I’m not the least bit self-conscious when I do. I don’t have time to feel self-conscious. Not with him. With him, all I want is more. More moments together. More sweetness. More strength.
I just want more of him in every way.
Robert looks at me as I pull off my clothing and toss it in my bright pink laundry basket. It’s one of the few feminine touches I have in my personal space. Everything else is cozy, but not decidedly girly.
“Well?” I ask him.
“Well, what?”
“Are you going to get naked? Or should I undress you?” I walk slowly over to him.
“It sounds like you’re trying to seduce me.”
“Not at all. After all, I thought you said you were going to be a good boy tonight.”
He growls, grabbing me by the hair, and pulls me close to himself. He bites my neck, nipping at my skin, and then pulls back.
“I was wrong,” he says.
“What?” I squeak, looking at him.
“I don’t want to be a good boy with you, Meredith. Not tonight.”
He lifts me up, and I’m shocked as he carries me to the bed. I wrap my legs around him, kissing him, and then we fall onto the bed together. We’re kissing and touching as we do, and I’m very aware of the fact that this time, this thing is going somewhere.
But I stop him.
“Wait.”
“What is it?” He looks at me, surprised.
“We don’t have to do this, Robert. Not if you aren’t ready. There’s really no pressure at all. I mean, I know we’re sort of trapped here together, but...”
“I want this,” he says breathily. “I want you.”
“Are you sure? It’s a big decision,” I whisper. “Your first time.”
It’s a little strange. Usually, the roles are reversed. Usually, the guy is the one telling the girl that there’s no pressure: that they don’t have to make this choice. Tonight, though, I’m the one giving Robert my blessing if he needs to wait.
If he’s not quite ready for everything that’s going to happen, then that’s okay. We don’t have to do anything he’s not comfortable with.
And as much as my body would absolutely die.
Luckily, he grins.
“Undress me,” he whispers.
I’m on my back and he’s over me. I reach for his shirt and start to carefully unbutton each button. Why are there so many? My hands seem to struggle with this simple task. It shouldn’t be so hard to do something like this, but I’m fighting to be able to get the shirt open.
He’s patient, waiting for me. My hands struggle, moving carefully, and finally, I finish opening the shirt. I push it back over his shoulders and he shrugs out of it.
“Wow,” I murmur, running my hands over his front.
“I hope that’s a good wow.”
“A very good wow.”
He’s cut. Like, really cut. Rippling? I think it’s safe to say that his abs are rippling, and I run my fingers over them. Touching his skin, I move my hands down lower to where he’s still got his belt and pants on.
“What about this?” I ask.
“Are you going to take it off?”
He raises an eyebrow and looks down at me, as though he’s challenging me. Am I up for it? Hell yes, I am. I’m not
one to turn down a sexy man who wants me to take off his belt. I reach for his neck and pull him close, kissing him. While he slides his tongue over mine, I reach down and start unbuckling his belt. Somehow, this seems easier than unbuttoning his shirt, and within seconds, I’m shoving his pants down over his hips.
He pulls away, climbs off the bed, and pushes his pants the rest of the way down.
He’s standing there in just his boxers, and he looks at me.
“What do you think?”
“I want more, Robert.”
“Tell me.”
“I want you to push your boxers down so I can see your cock, Robert.”
“Well, well, well. The little wolf isn’t so shy after all.”
“I never said I was shy.”
“Show me how you’re not shy,” he says.
“What are you asking me?”
“I think you know, little wolf.”
I wiggle off the bed and stand in front of him. I reach for him, placing my hands on his chest, and then I kiss his neck. Slowly, I tease my tongue down his skin until I get to his shoulder. Then I lean up and whisper in his ear.
“Oh, Mr. Bear, you make a dangerous request.”
Then, in one swift motion, I drop to my knees. I lean forward and rub my face against his cock. It’s still over the boxers, but oh, I can feel how hard he is.
And he’s really hard.
I kiss him over the boxers. My hands run up his thighs and cup his bottom, and then I just keep kissing him.
He groans a little, and that just eggs me on. I love those little noises. I love knowing how excited he is about this. If there’s one thing that makes me thrilled, it’s the way he’s letting loose with me.
Robert always seems just a little bit tense. I know why. I know things haven’t been easy for him since he came to Claw Valley, but oh, I hope that after today, he’s going to be so damn relaxed he doesn’t know what to do with himself.
When I think I’ve teased him enough, I reach for the top of his boxers with my mouth and tug, yanking the fabric down. I move with it until it falls to the floor, and then I lick up his thighs and to his balls.
“Little wolf,” he groans.
“Shhh. I have to show you I’m not shy,” I chuckle. I lick one of his balls and then the other. His cock is so hard and it’s right in my face, teasing me, but I want to make this a night he’s never going to forget. Finally, when I can’t resist anymore, I lick up his shaft and then take his length down my throat.