Eventually I got to the woods behind my father’s house and noticed the clouds looming dark in the sky as I shifted back. I glanced down at my cell phone, 6:30a.m. Just as well, I thought. I had missed the 5:00am run and subsequent meeting. At least I hadn’t missed breakfast.
I walked in to the smell of bacon and an absolutely full but silent dining room. My father took one look at me from the head of the table and snarled. I kept walking, ignoring all of the eyes around me that ranged from pitying, my friends, to outrage, my father, to glee, the elderly who couldn’t wait to see the ‘young rebellious fool’ get the beat down.
“Hey, pops. How’s it going?” I sauntered over to the buffet table and starting blindly piling on food, not caring what it was. A fist slammed onto the oversized oak table and it shook the whole room. I didn’t turn around.
“Get in my office, now” my father’s voice so horrifying I turned just to make sure he wasn’t mid-change. As suspected his eyes were a burning yellow but his human features remained, though just barely. Careful not to make any sudden movements, I walked slowly into the hallway and into his office.
As I congratulated myself on managing to bring the food with me, my father came up behind me, threw the plate against the wall, and locked us both inside. “I was going to eat that, Dad.” I spit the last word out with enough acid to dissolve a house.
“Sit down” he whispered. The rage had turned quiet and undeniably lethal. I sat and waited. And waited some more. Ten minutes must have passed before my father stopped pacing and sat in his own chair.
“You’ve been fighting again.”
It wasn’t a question but I answered it anyway. “Yeah...”
He cut me off “And not a human, one of our kind, I can smell his blood on you. What did he do, breathe in your direction?”
I winced, the truth wasn’t any better.
My silence turned my father’s face from furious to stone cold, empty. He spoke. “You missed the meeting, your meeting and you were out alone, fighting. You come home smelling of alcohol, sweat, and someone else’s blood. Did I get everything?”
“Yes, sir.”
“Cut the sir, shit, James. We’re done here.”
He said it and I knew he meant it. He was truly done with me, forever. My chest closed up and my body felt like it was on fire. I’d finally done it, I thought detachedly. I’d pushed him too far.
Suddenly I was on my feet. “No, we can’t be done, let me explain.” He didn’t even look up. I couldn’t get enough air. “I’m the Alpha. I’m going to be the leader. You need me.”
Gray eyes pierced me. “You are an Alpha but you are not a leader.”
“What do you mean, that’s the same thing. The pack needs me with or without your blessing.”
He stood “Alpha is what you were born as but you only embrace it when it gets you what you want. A leader is the thing you run away from at every opportunity. A leader is someone who lives, breathes and dies for the good of all. No one’s going to come to you to tell you how good their day is going, it’s all complaints, every bit of it and a leader deals with it when no one else can. They alone have to make the tough calls. You think because you are an Alpha that you deserve respect but if you listen to nothing else, hear this, respect is earned. It is your actions every day that can earn respect and nothing else, not your status and not who your father is. Your friends like you, James but they don’t respect you because you don’t respect them or their time. You don’t even respect yourself. I’m sick of the fighting, the drinking, and the messing around. You are 24 years old, you have responsibilities and you are throwing it all away because you are as selfish as anyone I’ve ever met. So no, I do not need you and neither do those people out there. What they need is a bright future with someone who will put them first, with or without my blessing, as you call it.”
I sat once again because my legs could no longer hold my weight. He had never spoken to me like this. I found myself saying the only thing I could, hoping he would understand. “Mom wouldn’t want this, dad. She wouldn’t give up on me.”
He exhaled a harsh breath and walked toward the door. “That is why I allow you stay. You will remain in the pack but nothing more.”
He paused at the door. “You know, it’s funny, I had this talk with your uncle yesterday when you weren’t answering my calls and he was convinced you were turning it all around. This is the first time, I’ve ever hated that I was right. ” He said and then he left.
I blanched, finally feeling something significant inside of me. Maybe it was the pain that comes with irrefutable proof that my own father bet against me. It was too bad that these feelings made me yearn for the emptiness. How stupid I’d been to want anything else.
I sat there in shock for who knows how long when Will stepped through the door. I banged my head into the chair behind me. Why Will, why now? “Look, there’s really not a worse time for you to be here, so get the hell out.”
“I want to talk to you.” He said as he sat on the edge of the desk.
“Will” I croaked, hardly getting the word out. “I’m not…just not now.”
“I know things aren’t right between us but this needs to be said, if you go out to fight, you need to bring me too.”
Of the freaking things…“I know this is hard for you to believe, but this is not even close to my priority list right now.”
“I don’t care. It’s on the top of mine. I’m not saying you need backup or any of that shit but I want to be there just in case. I’m not letting you get ambushed or worse. You go, I go. That’s it.”
“You didn’t seem to care all that much when you went to Texas for two and a half years, or since you’ve been back for that matter. I don’t see why you should care now.” I said, angrily.
He kicked the desk leg. “Not this, again, Jay. I did what I had to do. I care because I’m your freaking Beta and I’m not letting you drown. You want to go nuts so you can feel something, fine but don’t go alone.”
It unhinged me that somehow he could he see what my own father couldn’t see. “Well lucky for you, you won’t have to be my Beta for much longer. You’ll be handed my spot anytime now-“
He cut me off. “Don’t say that, Jay. I don’t want it and nothing can make me want it.”
I stood and walked to the door, resigned. “There’s nothing you can do about it.”
He got a steely look in his eye. “We’ll see about that. Wait, Jay…did he even remember?
I turned. “What?” “Did your father remember what yesterday was?
My voice shook. “He had no effing clue.” I pushed my forehead onto the doorway, feeling lifeless. My own father hadn’t remembered the anniversary of my mother’s death.
I’d figured it out when he called yesterday around 3 p.m. and left a message about some meetings followed by two more voicemails about him being angry that I wasn’t answering. None of these messages showed me he had any clue at all.
Will smoothed his hand over his shaved head “I’m going to take care of this. In the meantime, you call me, no matter what. You want to fight, you call me.”
I walked into the hallway “Whatever. Later.”
Chapter 10
Kira
I got a late start this morning making me feel extra grateful that it was a Saturday. It had been storming since I’d woken up and the pounding rain against my window and roof echoed throughout the room. I wasn’t overly tired but I was drained and without the sun for motivation, I couldn’t manage to get myself out of bed until noon. When I had, I slunk out into the kitchen to grab a bowl of cereal.
Christina was there, sitting over a cup of coffee in her pajamas, her blonde hair sticking out like she too had just rolled out of bed. We looked at each other and laughed.
“Long night?” she asked
“Not really, I got home before midnight. What about you, Cinderella?”
She smiled sheepishly, “I got in around three. I had the greatest time with Xander last night.
By the way, there’s more coffee in the pot if you want.”
“You’re amazing” I said as I practically ran to the coffee maker with my favorite colorful mug in hand. “Now tell me everything about the date.
“Ok” She paused dramatically then dove in. “He took me to dinner at a really nice place. Gosh, you should’ve seen it, it was gorgeous. The waiters were snooty and awful but the wine was amazing and the food, oh gosh the food. Even my salad was mouthwatering and I don’t even like salad. Then we went dancing. He took me to a Salsa club. It was all steamy and romantic and it had a live band. Xander wasn’t even good, the kid has two left feet but he took me anyway. It was so much fun. He brought me back to the apartment and he kissed me goodnight and I don’t know, it’s so weird but I don’t think I could feel any better if he asked to stay longer. He didn’t even try to stay .He kissed me and he left and I’ve been on cloud nine ever since. He’s just so different from other guys. I think…I think I’m really falling for him.”
My heart melted “Christina, that’s amazing. I’m so happy for you and if the way he looks at you is any indication, he’s already head over heals for you too.”
She beamed, “I hope your right. I never thought I’d be with such a nice guy but he’s funny and interesting and I don’t know it just feels like everything’s fitting into place. I mean, my mom’s been married more times than I want to think about. No one ever thought I could be in a stable relationship but I am. I can’t believe it. Oh gosh, I’m totally gushing. I’m going to stop now.”
“I don’t mind. I need some happy news.” “Uh-oh. What happened last night? What’s wrong?” “Well, my mom called yesterday and it’s hard to explain but there’s some family stuff going on. Bottom line, she wants me to come home and I just can’t. I won’t.” I sighed “Anyway that whole conversation just threw me off and then I ran into Jay and he looked worse off by a long shot. We headed over to Zoomly’s, the theme park place. Have you heard of it?”
“Oh yeah it’s a childhood staple around here.” “Right well we went there and everyone came and it was perfect.” The image of Jay’s purple eyes staring at me, up on the Cliff Diver from what felt like the top of the world, popped up in my brain. This kept happening and I tried to shrug it off again before I got off track. “Then it ended entirely too soon. So we went to this guy Daniel’s apartment for a house party and things just got out of hand.”
“I heard Daniel was having a party but that kid is completely certifiable, can’t imagine what his apartment must be like.”
I blanched “You know him?”
“Yeah, he’s been in this town for as long as I can remember. He’s involved in some pretty shade stuff.”
My stomach dropped. “What do you mean?” “His family is the creepy religious fanatic kind and not for any kind of religion a sane person would want to be involved in. You see, stepfather number…three, I think it was, was in the religion and he tried to get my mom and I involved. It was all hate and fear based and the occasional racist comments were tossed around here and there. Not to mention all the devil stuff, it was weird they thought everything was the devil, everything but themselves. ” She sipped her coffee “Luckily that marriage lasted only a month and a half.”
“Wow, Chris, I can’t imagine what that must’ve been like for you.” She perked up “Hey, don’t even stress, I’m totally fine. Most of my stepfathers were great and I get massive presents on my birthday from the one’s I still keep in touch with.”
“That is pretty cool.” I said.
“So what happened at Crazy Daniel’s party?”
I explained everything and told her how he’d gotten grabby.
“Grabby as in normal drunk guy, grabby?”
“No, that’s the part that scares me the most, I think he was stark sober. I couldn’t smell alcohol on his breath and he seemed totally normal. Then a fight almost broke out.” I winced, embarrassed all over again.
“Yikes, ok that’s really no bueno. Are you ok?”
“I’m fine, there are worse things and I’m glad the guys can use self-control because I almost didn’t and it would’ve been potentially way worse than any of this.”
“What do you mean you ‘almost didn’t use self control’ are you a black belt or something?”
Crap. I needed to watch my tongue. I was too emotional just as I had been last night. I needed to be clearheaded and focused. Keep my guard up or it’s dark shadow time for me. I put on my best dumb girl face. “Ha, I just really wanted to slap him once I was free but I’m glad I didn’t. It would’ve made it worse.”
“Worse? I would’ve paid to see you slap him.”
“Maybe, I don’t know. I just want to make a good impression in the town.”
She stood up and brought her mug to the sink “Totally understandable. So listen, I’m going to head over to my mom and step-dad number six’s house for the day. You’re welcome to join.”
I exhaled, relieved. “Thanks but I have a bunch of errands to run.”
“That’s cool. I’ll be back pretty late tonight so if I don’t see you, I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“Ok, have fun.” She said smiling and sauntered off to her room, too love struck to bother hiding it.
“You too” I called out and got out some cereal as I thought about what I should do today.
I needed a few things. I needed to go to the bank to deposit my much needed paycheck. I needed to go grocery shopping for food for the week. Lastly, I needed to hit a few farmer’s markets, gardens and healing stores. Hopefully between them I could find the ingredients I needed for a protective potion. While major spells could alert someone to my presence, I could get away with making a few potions without much of a fuss. Potions had considerably less residual magic to worry about but still had more than charms and wards. Plus I could bring the potion with me wherever I went in case I needed it.
It would be tricky though, I’d have to buy them the items separately and guarantee I wasn’t followed. I’d also have to pay in cash so I couldn’t be tracked. Even if this town had an apothecary, I couldn’t go in and buy all of the ingredients needed for a protective potion. More than likely, a witch would own the shop or one would be working there. They would know precisely what I was and what I was going to do if I bought exact ingredients. Buying a bunch of random ingredients and items in the store to look like a wannabe Wiccan would be too dangerous. I couldn’t deliberately put myself in a place that would have other witches hanging around in spades.
The thing is I live in constant fear of being discovered. Not by humans but by my own kind, the witches. There was a war going on between two groups, the Light and the Dark. They’ve disliked one another, believing their own ways to be the right ones but 28 years ago, tensions were at an all time high and the attacks began. My parents had escaped their coven in Washington in order to remain out of the war and out from under either side’s control.
Technically they practiced Light magic, which included healing spells, helping spells, and defensive spells. Dark magic, as expected practiced offensive spells, spells that were dangerous and deadly. One side derived its magic from life and earth’s devotion to it. The other derived its magic from death and the darkness from beyond.
My parents hid in New Mexico and a few years later, I was born. We lived there until I was about eight and even though no one had come looking for us, after a few mishaps with my magic in front of humans, my parents decided we needed to disappear, just in case. After roaming from place to place for about eight months, we ended up in Boston, the home I hadn’t left until a week ago.
My Mom and Dad were unwilling to let me go when I wanted to go away to College for my undergraduate studies but they agreed that I could leave after that. They were reluctant to do even that but I had one trump card up my sleeve and once I got accepted into Brisdale’s Veterinary Medicine Program, I played it.
My parents had run from the Light Witches because although they were the “good guys” in the war,
they were not blameless. The Light Witches were strict and when it came to their beliefs, they were ruthless. Under their leader, Zorlon, rules became more constricting and spells were limited to their exacting standards. Trying so hard to make sure no Dark magic would taint them turned them into zealots filled with paranoia and suspicion.
Yes, Mom and Dad ran away to be free of the risks and danger of war but they also ran away so they could be free in general. Keeping me cooped up in our home defeated the purpose of freedom.
I was a responsible adult, I knew the dangers I could face but I also knew how to protect myself. In short, I deserved my own life. When presented with that, they couldn’t deny me any longer.
If there was a possibility I was in danger, I owed it to myself and to my parents to take every precaution possible. That’s why today I was going to make my protection potion and hope for the best. I ate, showered, and dressed for the weather, still raining. I grabbed my umbrella on the way out and ran to my car.
Chapter 11
Jay
I’d been in my house for a total of six hours before I got the call. Six hours of lying in bed, unmoving but not asleep. Six hours of staring at the blank ceiling and listening to the rain, lightning and thunder that had finally stopped. Six hours alone and empty enough to allow the images of my life before my mother’s death to take over.
My phone buzzed in my pocket and ripped me from my thoughts. On autopilot, I picked up.
“James” My father’s voice came through the phone and it was stiff and formal.
“Dad…” I waited.
“I think I knew, I think I knew and I blocked it out because it’s too hard. I loved her so much, Jay. ” His voice was as unsteady as I ever heard it.
“Yeah.” I responded.
“I know it’s not an excuse. I don’t expect you to think that it’s ok but we’ve both made mistakes.” I didn’t know what to say. He continued, his voice much stronger now. “Well, it’s clear to me that I need to reassess my earlier decisions.”
Shifting Shadows (Sparks Collide Trilogy) Page 7