by KyAnn Waters
She turned. Her profile caused an immediate surge of blood. She glanced in his direction and smiled. Her eyes twinkled with mischief. He looked over his shoulder. Good goddamn thing the smile was for him.
Weaving his way through the bar, he greeted a few friends. He approached and settled his hand on her jutting hip. “You look amazing.”
“Thank you.” She smiled then laughed lightly.
“Is our argument over?”
“I can't stay mad at you. Now go sit at our table. The gang is here.” She playfully bumped against him. “Not too close to me, you'll spoil my game.”
“I am your game.” He slid his hand around to her ass.
“Are you sure?”
By her tone, he understood. She intended to continue playing by her rules. “What are the stakes?”
“How much are you willing to lose?” She stepped between his wide spread thighs. “Oh.” Her face lit with surprise. “Is that my prize?”
He leaned in close. “If your hand touches the prize again, I'm going to drag you to my truck and fuck you in the parking lot. I don't care who spies my ass in the air. It's been two days. I about blew in my jeans when I saw you in this skirt.”
She put her hands on top of the bar and purposely leaned her thigh into his groin. He hissed.
“How do the lyrics to Johnny Be Good go?” she said. “His mama told him someday he would be a man.” She licked her lips. “I'd say you've proven you're a man.”
“But I'm not a leader of a band.”
“Oh, but Johnny you've been playing me all along. So well in fact, that I would drive miles to have you play me after the sun goes down.” She flipped her hair, lowered her lashes, and gave him her sleepy, sexy, smile. “But we need to remember tonight is a game.”
Johnny had to kiss her. He leaned in and whispered, “Not when it comes to us, sex, and the future.”
She pulled back. “Tonight is just sex. And not in front of the gang.” She put her hand on his chest. “So do you want to play?”
“No games. Not with me.” He covered her hand with his, angled his body to face the bar, and slid her fingers over the steel rod throbbing behind the fly of his jeans. “That doesn't mean I don't want to play with you.” No one could see. He shut his eyes as her fingers closed around him then gently stroked him once.
“Later,” she said, flattening her palm.
“Now.”
Oh, but how Krissy would love to blow Johnny's mind by blowing him. Two nights ago, she'd asked him to leave, but she wasn't going to lose her best friend. When he'd walked in wearing tight black jeans and lavender silk shirt, she'd wanted to jump tables and run into his arms.
Instead, she'd stayed by the bar and flirted while her stomach pitched and rolled. Even with the playful banter, she saw the guarded veil hiding his usual openness. She couldn't blame him. He probably hurt as much as she did. Give it a few months and he'd thank her for diverting fatal damage.
“Tonight I'm flying solo.” She patted his chest. “But I'll buy you a beer.” She smiled. He didn't. “Don't do this,” she whispered. “Not here. I don't want everyone to know what almost happened.”
“Almost? What exactly almost happened? Because we didn't almost have sex, I didn't almost fall in love, and we didn't almost commit to each other. The only almost is whether you're pregnant.”
“Shh. People are looking.” She took his hand. Weaving through the tables, she made her way to the exit. If he wanted to yell, they were better off outside.
They walked around the side of the building where they wouldn't be on display for anyone coming or going from the bar. She leaned against the bricks and closed her eyes. She couldn't be here and not think about the way he had touched her. Looking at his face, he must have been thinking the same thing.
“What do you want me to say? I'm sorry doesn't seem to be enough.” She lifted her tired eyes. “I'm trying to fix the mistake I think we've made.”
Johnny paced like a tiger caged at the zoo. Now and again, his eyes made contact. Mostly she wondered when he'd pounce. And when he did, would it be in anger or passion. At the moment, she doubted she could handle either one. At least with anger she had a chance at keeping her heart. Succumbing to his heated touch, and deliciously wicked kiss, would be her undoing.
Johnny growled and ran his fingers through his hair. “We aren't a mistake. The baby won't be a mistake. Giving up on us would be.”
“In my head, I have a list of all the wonderful reasons I need you in my life. Something happened after we made love.” Her uneasy stomach twisted. “I think about you and me, about the future, and I just know somehow I'm going to screw it up.”
He took two steps closer to her. “You're screwing it up now.” He pounded a fist against his chest. “I love you,” he hissed through his teeth. “I don't want to go back to being just friends.” He looked away. “I don't think I can.”
“We can if we try.”
“I don't want to try,” he hollered then sagged against the wall beside her.
“So where does this leave us?” Somehow, she had to get him to understand her position. Middle ground is what they needed. He'd risk all they had, and she didn't want to take any chances.
He grasped her fingers, and she glanced down at their joined hands. His were strong and warm, and she immediately thought about how those fingers felt on her flesh. She lifted her head and looked into his face. Pain reflected in his darkened eyes. The knots in her belly tightened.
“Maybe it was a mistake from the beginning,” he said.
She grew quiet, pensive about where that left them.
He let go of her hand, turned, and propped a shoulder against the wall. Muted music from the club vibrated through the darkened windows and brick walls. Diffused light permeated the shadows where they stood. She wanted to smooth the furrow from his brow, kiss the grimace from his mouth.
“Don't you think it's entirely possible you'll figure out we're good together?” He touched her cheek.
Close to tears, she closed her eyes and shook her head. “I never said we weren't. Don't you worry about the future? I know me. I don't do love. Not like the rest of the planet.”
His fist clenched at his side.
“Stepping back now will be much easier,” she said. “Our lives will be a tangled mess in a few months and there won't be any way to get back what we had.”
His chest lifted and fell on the deep sigh. “You finally understand. It's already too late.” He stepped away from the wall. “I can't do this anymore.” He held her finger and gave a little shake.
Then he walked away.
“Johnny, wait.” She ran after him. Catching up to him, she grabbed him by the elbow. “What exactly are you telling me? You'll lose our friendship because I won't be your girlfriend?”
“Listen to what you're saying. Date who you want, do what you want. I'm done. I can't play these games with you anymore.”
Almost afraid to ask, she whispered, “What about the baby?”
“I'm sorry. Being with you is more than just sex to me. It has to mean something to you, too.”
“It does! I don't want anyone else.” Her face heated, wishing...pleading that he would understand. “Having a baby with you was the most important decision I've ever made. That hasn't changed.”
“I know.” He touched her cheek. “But this time I'm thinking of myself. I thought I could convince you. I want a family, a wife, and a kid. Weekend visitation won't be enough. I have my resume out with several law firms. I'm hoping the summer clerkship will get me in the door. One more year of law school and then we'll be financially set. I planned to take care of you and our baby.” His eyes squinted against the riotous emotions he attempted to keep from her. His jaw clenched and his lips pulled tight. “I don't want one without the other.”
“I can't promise forever. Yet I can't lose you. So am I supposed to stay in a relationship when that isn't what I want?”
“I guess that's the crux of our problem. I tho
ught you did.” He turned from her, walked across the parking lot, and climbed behind the wheel of his truck.
The music thumped around her. People chattered as they came and went from the bar. Krissy's world just drove away without looking back.
She couldn't go back inside and pretend nothing happened. But if she didn't, she'd draw more attention. Krissy did what she did best. She sucked it up. The center of attention, the life of the party, pretended she didn't care and rejoined her friends.
But ten minutes later, she'd had enough.
“I'll see you all later. I've got to work tomorrow.”
“I'll walk you out, wood girl. Let's go.” Drew put his hand on the small of her back and escorted her out of the bar.
Once outside, he asked, “What's up with you and Johnny? And don't give me any of your bullshit. I know you fucked him on my dryer so I think that gives me leeway to ask questions.”
Krissy snorted. “It was the washer. So lay it on me. I know I'll hear it from Ryan. Tell me how I've ruined the six- pack. Wasn't that your comment? Don't fuck up the six- pack by fucking Johnny.”
“God, do you people keep a record of what I say?”
“I know what I've done, and now I'm trying to fix it. Johnny has other ideas.”
“Johnny's been in love with you since high school. What did you think would happen when you started fucking him? Hell, Krissy, guys fall in love with you after three dates. Why do you think I call you the wood girl? It isn't because you sell cabinets. You can't help it. Men like the way you look. Johnny loves you, not the body.”
“Then you think I should ignore the little voice in my head telling me to back out quick. That little voice has saved my ass more times than I can remember.”
“This time the little voice told you to run from the best thing that could've ever happened to you. We all love you. Johnny wouldn't care what the package looked like.” He let his eyes travel down her body. “He isn't complaining. But it wouldn't make a difference.”
She rolled her eyes. “And I should take the advice of the consummate bachelor?”
He shrugged. “Nope. I'd run, too. And I'll probably never have what you and Johnny do.”
Krissy unlocked her car door. “I'm trying to protect what I have with Johnny.” Nothing, not even the child she wanted, was worth giving up her friendship. If she already had the baby, maybe she'd feel differently. But what you've never had, you can't miss. She didn't want to miss Johnny. “I'll fix this.”
“You didn't make a mistake sleeping with him.” He kissed her forehead. “You're more than a pretty face and a sexy body. Who knows you better than Johnny? I'm not telling you what to do.” He smirked. “Yeah, okay, maybe I am telling you what to do. I had it wrong. Don't fuck up the six- pack, fuck Johnny.”
She slugged him in the gut. He pulled her against his tall frame and held tight.
“What if I can't get Johnny to talk to me? I don't want you, Ryan, Shelby, or Casey to have to choose between us. What if I already screwed up the group?”
“He'll come around.”
Yeah, but she knew Johnny, too. This time he'd walked away. Something he'd never done before.
Chapter Ten
Slumber Party Hell
Johnny didn't want to go home to his little apartment. He wanted to go back into the bar and toss back beers with the Ryan and Drew. He needed male bonding after having had enough of women for the night. Hell for the month. And he needed beer to wash bitter taste of losing Krissy from his mouth.
After circling the block, he drove back through the parking lot and found a spot. He sat in the cab of his truck and watched the door. If she came out with another man, he'd go ballistic. The flash of jealousy told him he was nowhere ready to give her up.
Finally, he climbed from the truck, locked the doors and walked into the club.
He waved to Stan sitting in his chair wearing a yellow security T- shirt. Johnny made his way into the bar, noticing the crowd had thinned. Scanning the room, he didn't see Krissy. In fact, he didn't see any of the gang. He supposed it was just as easy to drink alone because tonight he had a mission. He wanted, no, he needed to be drunk.
Johnny used the restroom and then went to the bar and ordered a shot of whisky with a beer chaser. Closing his eyes, he let the alcohol slide down his throat. The burn didn't dull the pain in his chest caused by the image of Krissy heartbroken in the parking lot. He'd walked away from her, destroying her dream of having a baby. He forced the memory into his head of her coming apart in his arms, whispering his name, but it faded, replaced once again by the sadness in her eyes just before he had turned and left.
Drew slapped him on the shoulder. “I thought you bailed.”
Johnny jumped. “You scared the shit out of me.” He chuckled. “Yeah, I decided I didn't want to go home. But I don't want to see Krissy.” He glanced around. “Is she still here?”
“Ryan and Shelby took her home.”
“I intend to get smashed.” Johnny took another drink of beer.
“Looks like you could use a friend to help you get there.”
“I knew I could count on you.” Johnny toasted him. “How're we getting home?”
“Leave it to me.” Drew winked.
Drew weaved across the room. Sharing a few words with the woman shooting darts, he waved Johnny over.
Johnny had seen the woman in the bar on occasion, but admittedly most of the time he hung with Krissy. Outside of the gang, he had acquaintances. Drew on the other hand, buzzed about, the busy bee of the group, pollinating the pretty flowers. Shit, he was drunk if he was starting to refer to Drew's conquests as pretty flowers.
In an odd way, Drew was the male version of Krissy. They both mingled like social butterflies. The similarity ended at the bedroom door. Krissy kept hers closed, whereas Drew had a revolving door. Once he tired of a girl, a new one was always on the way in. Sometimes they bumped into each other. Watching him juggle girlfriends was entertainment.
Johnny found a table. The three of them played darts and drank beer. Johnny set out on a mission to get drunk and unlike his plan with Krissy, this one he'd managed to complete in record time. He set his beer aside having had enough. Dealing with Krissy as a lover turned his mind to mush and made him a lush. He chuckled.
“Drew, I think I need to go. Don't say no. Someone stop me. I'm rhyming. Aagh.” He laughed, swiveled in the barstool and tried to control the fuzziness in his mind.
Drew took the seat next to him, leaned back against the wall, and watched whatshername throw another dart. “I talked to Krissy after you left.”
“And?”
“She's pulling a classic Krissy. She regrets getting involved.”
“She regrets committing,” Johnny clarified. “Take my word for it, she doesn't regret the sex.”
“Maybe you should give her what she wants. Be fuck buddies.” Drew wagged his brows. “Forever.”
“Best friends with benefits.” That certainly held appeal. Did he take what she offered? Was it enough? No, not by a long way. Maybe he ought to show her what she's missing. She wanted their relationship to return to friendship. He doubted Krissy would handle it any better than he did.
He grabbed his beer off the table. “I think Krissy should get exactly what she asked for.” He tipped his bottle to Drew's.
“And what exactly does Krissy ask for? I bet she's kinky.”
Johnny held a drink of beer in his mouth then swallowed.
“What? I've always been curious.”
“You'll stay that way.”
Drew chuckled. “You forget I heard you in my laundry room. Every time I throw in a load, I get a hard on. Never used to like doing the wash.”
“So can you get your girlfriend to give me a ride?”
“Hell, no. If I'm lucky, and we both know I am, Sexy Lexy will be riding me.” He smiled.
“Funny. I think I'll take your advice.” The alcohol made him either brave or stupid. “Drop me off at Krissy's. Do you know how she
planned to get her car in the morning?”
“I'll be coming back in the morning. I'll pick you both up.” Drew stood and went to his date. Leaning in, he whispered in her ear while his hand smoothed over her hip. He waited while Lexy bid her friends farewell.
“Okay guys, ready. If either of you puke in my jeep, I kick your asses. Don't think I can't. I've got a black belt, and I intend to use it.”
“Mmm.” Drew put his arm around her shoulder. “Lucky me.” He winked at Johnny. “Can I use my black belt on you?” Drew kissed her neck.
“Only if I'm naughty.” She grabbed her purse and they headed out.
The open- air jeep zipped through the deserted streets. Warm, summer air swirled around Johnny. Riding in the back contributed to the effects of the alcohol. Unable to focus on the blur of town, he watched Lexy stroke Drew's thigh, inching ever closer to his groin. Drew groaned and grabbed his crotch.
Johnny punched the back of the passenger seat. “Wait until you drop me off.”
By the time Lexy pulled into the lot of Krissy's apartment complex, Johnny's cock pulsed in his jeans. “Thanks.” He stood on the seat and jumped to the ground. He doubted Lexy heard. She and Drew were lip locked in the front seat.
Unsteady on his feet, he walked to Krissy's door. How many times had he fumbled with the key? He shushed himself. If Krissy had already fallen asleep, he'd slip in and crash on the couch. He hoped she was up, because he certainly was. He adjusted so the first thing she saw wasn't the bulge in the front of his pants.
Entering the house, he closed the door quietly and locked it. Looks like just friends tonight. The house was dark and she was obviously asleep.
He didn't need to turn on a light to find the bathroom. After taking care of business, he left his jeans and shirt lying on the floor.
He glanced at Krissy's bedroom door. Bar smell clung to his skin. Debating whether to risk waking her, he decided he probably needed a cold shower. Back to friends, not likely. Time to see how Krissy liked knowing he showered naked only a few feet from her bedroom. Heat rushed through his body and his balls tightened. Obviously his cock liked knowing she lay in the bed on the other side of the hall.