‘Catch.’
I look up just in time to see a bottle of water flying towards me. Unfortunately, I’m too weak to move out of the way and it smashes into my face. I grab hold of it before it rolls off the rock and lie back, holding the ice-cold bottle against my cheek. ‘Sorry,’ says Otto. ‘There’s more water in your kayak. I’m going to check on Pearl. But I’ll be back!’ I sit up and watch as he turns the boat around and shoots off towards Vilda, leaving a trail of white foam.
I drag myself to my feet, unscrew the bottle and take a sip of the most delicious water I’ve ever tasted in my life. Then I find the first purple arrow and plod into the woods. I force my legs to move faster until I’m almost, almost, jogging. More staggering, really. ‘Come on, legs,’ I say desperately. ‘Don’t stop working. In a minute, you’ll be resting in a kayak and it’s all going to be down to the arms.’ I’m talking to my legs. Maybe I’m dehydrated. ‘Sorry, arms,’ I add, then I have a big drink of water before I start talking to any other body part.
Otto catches up with me as I leave Fejan. All the way to Vilda, he follows me in the speedboat, yelling lots of useful advice. I keep telling him to go away, but he ignores me. Really, I’m pleased he’s here. Wild Kat is a heavy kayak built for two, and my arms and legs are barely working. Towards the end of training, Pearl and I were averaging one kilometre in twenty minutes. When I finally see Pearl standing on the beach of Vilda, a colourful tie-died figure, hair covered in silver beads and face smeared with blue, red and white face paint, I’ve been kayaking for over forty minutes.
‘Go Kat!’ she yells, jumping up and down. ‘You nutter! You actually did it!’ She wades into the sea and hauls herself into the front of the kayak. ‘Let’s finish this race.’ Pearl grabs her paddle, drags it through the water and pulls us round and back out to sea.
The pain in my shoulders eases and I feel a mad new strength. ‘Otto,’ I say. ‘You can go back to Stråla now. Honestly. We’ll be fine.’
‘I know,’ he says. ‘Girls. Do you want these?’ He holds up two Plopp bars.
‘Did the others have one?’
‘No. I got them for emergencies.’
‘We’re fine,’ I say. ‘We’re finishing the race just like everyone else. We just did an extra tough version of it.’
Otto shrugs. ‘See you back at Stråla,’ he says, then he revs the engine and zooms away.
‘I badly want a Plopp,’ says Pearl.
The journey to Stråla is painful, but strangely chilled out. We know the worst is over now. Luckily, Pearl is pumped and does most of the work. ‘Say goodbye to Reception Rock,’ she says as we paddle past it.
‘Bye, Rock,’ I say, remembering how tired I got swimming out to it the first time. Now the distance looks tiny.
‘When we get in, I bet they’ve all gone home,’ says Pearl. ‘When do you think the others finished?’
‘About two hours ago?’
‘And how long has it taken us?’
‘Over three hours.’
‘That’s funny,’ says Pearl, and she starts to laugh. ‘Three hours! We’ve definitely broken a Tuff Troll record.’
‘But we did it,’ I say. ‘We’ve definitely got a story to tell.’
‘Thanks to Wild Kat.’
I give the kayak a pat. ‘She may be battered and leak a bit, but she got us back safely.’
Pearl turns round and laughs. ‘I mean you, you idiot. I knew you could do it.’
‘Thanks,’ I say, but Pearl’s already turned away. We go on in silence, past our cottage, heading for the cafe and harbour. The evening light is soft and golden and Pearl’s hair beads shine in the low sun. Our paddles dip in and out of the water and I can’t see where the milky sea ends and the pale sky begins.
‘My bum is going to ache on the plane tomorrow,’ I say as we round the rocks by the cafe.
‘Look,’ says Pearl. Floating past our kayak is a paper lantern and inside a candle flickers. ‘Otto said he had lanterns to light when it got dark. Someone’s done one early.’
‘There’s another one,’ I say. We paddle on, the two lanterns bumping against the side of our kayak. We pass the tip of the island and suddenly we are gliding through a sea of paper lanterns.
‘No one’s gone home,’ Pearl whispers.
I look up. The harbour and cafe are lined with people. As soon as they see us, they start to cheer and call out to us, encouraging us home. I see Frida and Nils at the end of the jetty, and jumping up and down on our rock are Sören and Nanna. I scan the crowd. All the other contestants are there too, changed and showered, and wearing Tuff Troll medals. I even spot numbers seven and eight wearing brand new ‘I Stråla’ hoodies. Peeta and Leo are nowhere to be seen.
‘They lit the lanterns for us,’ says Pearl.
‘Are you crying?’ I ask.
‘Shut up! It’s your splashy paddling. See, I’ve got splashes on my clothes.’
‘And your cheeks.’
‘It’s just so pretty,’ she says, ‘like a fairy tale.’
We glide through the glowing lanterns and as we reach the pier, arms reach down and haul us out of the kayak and on to dry land. Otto appears in front of us.
‘Welcome home, our very Tuff Trolls.’ He places a gold medal round my sunburnt neck and I smile. I’m too tired to talk. ‘You deserve that,’ he says. ‘A two-kilometre sea swim is quite an achievement.’ Hands clap me on the back, someone presses a bottle of water into my hand and a towel is draped over my shoulders. Otto gives me my Plopp.
He turns to Pearl. ‘This is for you.’ He struggles to get her medal over her beads, so she takes over, forcing it over her wild hair and round her neck. Next, Otto gets a sheet of stickers out of his pocket, peels off a small red star and sticks it on her medal.
‘That makes forty,’ she says, smoothing down each point. Otto hands her a roll-up cigarette, which she tucks behind her ear. ‘Thanks,’ she murmurs, staring at the star.
‘Now, I need to get this party started,’ says Otto, pushing his way through the crowd.
Nanna finds us and drags us into the cafe just as Otto’s mike bursts into life. ‘Är du redo att rocka?’ he shouts, then dance music blasts across the mötesplats followed by Otto growling, ‘Seckseee deescow!’
It’s the best Disco Otto ever.
Pearl and I binge on fries and ice cream, and as the sun goes down, we dance with Nanna to ABBA. Even though I’m still wearing my spotty shorts and my nose is peeling, I feel just right. When Otto puts on ‘Happyland’, Nanna and Pearl go crazy, but I decide to sit it out. As I keep reminding everyone, I swam a very long way today. I sit with my back against our rock and watch as Otto gets the crowd doing the sprinkler. Then I see Peeta weaving through the dancers, ducking to avoid all the jiggling elbows.
It’s like a rerun of the day she arrived on the island, only this time it’s me she’s walking towards, and me that she’s smiling at. I have to stop myself from looking behind me.
‘Hej, Kat,’ she says. Yep. Definitely me.
‘Hej.’ I look up at her. She’s wearing a strappy dress and the very last rays of sun shine on her golden hair and Tuff Troll medal. ‘You look resplendent!’ I say.
‘Thanks.’ She says this uncertainly and twirls a bottle of Fanta round in her hands.
‘You do. I mean it. I like your dress.’
After a moment’s hesitation, she sits down opposite me. ‘You got back OK?’
‘Would you believe that we swam to the wrong island?’
‘Really?’ She laughs, but for once it’s not a mean laugh. For a while, we sit and watch Pearl trying to teach Nanna to moonwalk, but Nanna keeps getting the giggles and eventually they give up. Peeta says, ‘You’re going home tomorrow, right?’
‘All the way back to England.’
‘That’s what I thought.’ She pauses then says, ‘Did you know Leo and me split up?’ She glances across at me, still twisting her bottle, then quickly carries on. ‘It was ages ago, the day after I arrived here, and I
didn’t take it very well. My mum and dad hate each other at the moment and Leo makes me feel calm, you know?’
‘I guess,’ I say. Leo’s made me feel a lot of things this summer, but then I remember when I jumped off the cliff into the pool, how he looked up at me and smiled. I nod. ‘I know what you mean.’
‘I told him that I wasn’t going to leave Stråla. I thought I could change his mind just by being around.’ She laughs and shakes her head. ‘Anyway, it didn’t work and I’m going tomorrow too. I wanted to say goodbye and to say sorry if I’ve been a bit crazy, you see … I was jealous of you.’
The sun has gone now and our corner of the terrace is in shadow, the only light coming from little candles that flicker in jars. I look at Peeta. She’s hugging her knees. ‘Because Leo took me kayaking?’ I ask.
‘A little, but really it was seeing you with your friends. You’ve all had so much fun together.’ I look across at the dancefloor. Pearl and Nanna are slow dancing with Sören. I don’t think Sören wants to be there. He’s definitely trying to escape. ‘I don’t have many friends,’ Peeta says. ‘Leo was one of them, but I messed that up.’ I think about the times Nanna, Pearl and I went Fun Running round the island, and how often we saw Peeta watching us. We never asked her to join in.
‘So, I’ve got to go and pack,’ she says, getting up. I stand up too, wincing as my poor bum muscles are forced into action. ‘Tomorrow I’m going to go home and hang out with Annika, my best friend. Hopefully, when Leo gets back, we can be friends again.’
We face each other, and I’m not sure what to say. I realise I don’t really want to say goodbye. ‘Maybe we’ll meet up again, here on Stråla.’
‘Maybe … I could bring Annika,’ she says.
‘Dance at Disco Otto …’
‘… Compete in Tuff Troll. I’ll have to get her training with me.’ She steps round the rock and hugs me. ‘Hej då, Kat.’
‘Hej då,’ I say. Then she lets go, waves and walks through the dancers, her hair floating out behind her.
Nanna calls me over. Otto has put on ‘I Need a Hero’ and as far as she’s concerned, this is our song. ‘Come and dance!’
I shake my head. ‘My legs are killing me.’ But this isn’t a good enough excuse. She walks over and drags me on to the dancefloor where Pearl is waiting for us.
TWENTY
Later, I leave Nanna and Pearl dancing and walk to the end of the pier. I sit down, letting my bare feet dangle in the water, and I stare across the sea at the full moon. A silver path stretches from my toes to the horizon. I feel like I could step out on to it. I nudge a lantern away with my toe.
‘They’re eco-lanterns.’ I look round. Leo’s standing behind me. He smiles uncertainly. ‘They don’t have wire so they should biodegrade, but I’m still not sure they’re safe …’ He trails off. ‘Kat,’ he says, stepping closer. ‘If I sit next to you, will you jump in the sea?’
‘No.’ I laugh. ‘I’m so tired I wouldn’t be able to get out again.’ He sits down and even though we aren’t touching, somehow I can feel the warmth of his shoulders. ‘Where’ve you been?’ I say, giving him a small nudge.
‘I had to do a lot of packing up for Otto. I’m basically his slave for the summer.’ He pauses. ‘Kat, I was so worried when you went missing.’
‘Thank you for looking for us,’ I say.
‘I just kept telling myself you’d both be OK because I know how well you can swim. I thought about when we went to Vilda –’
‘When I was being such an airhead? Screaming at the tiniest drop of water and desperate to work on my tan?’ I glance across at him and smile. I’m not even annoyed when I say this.
He shakes his head. ‘That’s not what I thought.’
‘Then why did you say those things?’ Before I go home, I want to understand everything.
‘Because I panicked and tried to hide the truth from Peeta. I thought, just by seeing us together, Peeta would know.’
‘Know what?’
Leo turns to look at me, but I stare at the sea. I don’t want to say or do anything because that precious feeling between the two of us that began on Vilda is coming back and it feels so wonderful it’s like being bathed in sunlight, except it’s moonlight shining down on us. Leo slips his hand into mine. Our hands fit together perfectly. ‘Kat, I have liked you since the first moment I met you.’
‘Since the naked Little Frog dance?’ I ask. Then I go, ‘Ack ack,’ which is essentially ‘ribbit, ribbit’ in Swedish, and is a crazy thing to say when you have just been told the best news.
He laughs. ‘It was a memorable moment.’ He squeezes my hand. ‘Hey,’ he says, ‘are you going to look at me.’ I turn and face him. ‘Still not going to jump into the sea?’ I shake my head. ‘Because there’s something important I need to say, something I should have said on the roof of Otto’s cabin.’ He doesn’t take his eyes off me. ‘I’m sorry I didn’t tell you I had a girlfriend and I’m sorry I said those things about you. You’re not blåst. You’re the opposite of blåst. You’re rolig … modig.’ Funny, brave. He looks at me to check I understand. ‘That day …’ He holds my hand a little tighter. ‘Det betydde allt för mig.’ It meant everything to me.
‘Mig också,’ I say. Me too. Now I’m blushing in the darkness, so I rest my head against him and he puts his arm around me. I thought everything between us had disappeared, just like the sparkling phosphorescence, but now it’s come back. And it’s still magical. Resting against Leo feels even better than I imagined and, for a minute, I let myself enjoy the warmth of his chest and being held by him. Even though it is amazing to hear him say these things, I wonder how Peeta would feel if she could see us now. I know exactly how she’d feel. ‘You know,’ I say, ‘tonight Peeta told me that you broke up ages ago.’
‘I tried to tell you, but you kept throwing buckets at me … or running away.’
‘Hey, you trod on my cinnamon bun.’
‘OK, but now, Kat, I don’t have a girlfriend, and right now you are here and I am here, and so are the stars. Otto’s playing “Guantanamera” again, and we’ve even got lanterns!’
He’s right. It is the moment I was dreaming about … before I met Peeta. And it would be so easy to reach up and kiss him. I look out to sea and I remember when I was swimming alone to Fejan, just a speck in the ocean.
Suddenly, I know what I have to do. I force myself to lift my head off his shoulder and sit up.
‘Do you know,’ I say, ‘doing this race today, finishing it, is the best thing I have ever done. If I hadn’t met you, if we hadn’t gone to Vilda and you hadn’t believed I could jump off that cliff, I might never have done it. I’m even going to do a race with my family, Cliff Hanger, and all because you reminded me how brave I can be. But I can’t stop thinking about Peeta right now, and I don’t want my last memory of Stråla to be kissing you, Peeta’s ex-boyfriend, and then going home and never seeing you again.’
‘Why wouldn’t we see each other again?’
I laugh. ‘Because you’ll have forgotten about me in a few weeks and we live eight hundred miles away from each other.’
‘Maybe I’m never going to forget you. Maybe I like you so much that eight hundred miles is nothing. Next summer, you could come back here. We can kayak all over the archipelago and stay on a different island every night. We could have a whole summer of Vildas!’
‘My dad would love that!’
‘He could come too, and your mum, and Britta. We could race them from island to island.’ I look at his kind brown eyes and shake my head. ‘So this is it?’ He looks slightly amazed.
I nod. ‘Goodbye, Leo,’ I say and I stand up. I pull him to his feet and we hug. We probably hug for a bit too long and usually when I hug someone I don’t use my entire body, or rest my head on the other person’s shoulder, or smell them … and then try and pin down the smell because it’s the best smell in the world and I never want to forget it.
‘Goodbye, Kat,’ Leo says into my hair. It’s hard to
stop an amazing hug, but Pearl helps.
‘Phosphorescence,’ she yells, grabbing me by the arm and pulling me away. ‘Back at the cottage. Frida just told me. Let’s go.’ She pulls me down the pier. ‘Nice knowing you, Leo!’ she calls, and I let her drag me away from Leo and somehow I don’t look back.
TWENTY-ONE
‘Never forget me!’ yells Nanna. She’s come to the dock to see us off and she’s wearing a batman onesie. As she jumps up and down her cape flies out behind her.
Our boat moves away from the dock and starts to pick up speed. Pearl and I hold on to the rail and water sprays into our faces. ‘We won’t, you freak!’ shouts Pearl.
All I can do is wave. Last night, I was on a Tuff Troll high. Pearl and I splashed around in phosphorescence then stayed up late chatting to Frida and finishing our packing; leaving didn’t seem real. Later, when I lay in bed, I couldn’t sleep, even though I was exhausted. The engine roars as the boat bumps over a wave. Nanna is tiny now, but I don’t take my eyes off her or the dock. The further we get from Stråla, the sadder I feel until I realise, in a panic, that this is it. I’ve left Leo behind. ‘Pearl,’ I say, grabbing her arm. ‘I think I made a terrible mistake.’
‘Yep. You should have snogged him.’
‘But if I had, wouldn’t I feel even worse now?’
Pearl shrugs. ‘It’s what I’d have done. Do you want a Lakrisal?’ She holds out the packet to me. ‘Take all of them,’ she says. ‘I’ve got loads in my bag. I’m going to find Frida.’
Even though Lakrisal taste like salty medicine, I peel back the silver paper and put one in my mouth. When I look up, I can’t see Nanna, and Stråla is just a lump of rocks and trees, one of many islands scattered across the archipelago. My chest aches and I suck the sweet. I did the right thing, I tell myself, again and again, until Stråla is a dot on the horizon. And then, in a flash of sunlight, it disappears.
*
Travelling across Stockholm on no sleep and a semi-broken heart is tiring. Somehow, Frida manages to get us to the airport on time, even though Pearl has a major tantrum when she discovers that we can’t go to the ABBA museum.
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