“Thanks. I'll see if Charlie has plans for tomorrow evening.”
Kaitlyn rolled her eyes upward but didn't say anything. Rose had a hard time believing Kaitlyn had kept her opinions to herself about Charlie, but she was letting her son make his own decisions.
Kaitlyn stood from the table, picking up a stack of dishes. “Patrick and I will wash the dishes tonight. Cullen, take Rose for a walk or a ride. Go enjoy the evening together.”
Cullen looked at Rose as Kaitlyn and Patrick, loaded down with dishes, hustled out of the dining room through the swinging door into the kitchen.
“Well, ma is never subtle. Sorry about that.”
“I love your parents, Cullen. You were so fortunate they made you part of the family. I envy you, you know.”
“Why? Other than your unique lifestyle, didn't you have good parents?”
“My grand-mère and the circus family raised me after mother fell when I was five years old. Father was always busy with family business, along with my grand-père. The only time I spent with my father was when we practiced or performed.”
“I'm sorry. You never talked about your mother. I assumed she was still living, but perhaps she'd left the circus.”
“Oh no, she was born in the circus. My grandparents arranged that she and my father would marry to combine two tightrope families. My father’s family from France and my mother’s family is from Italy. I gather it was a European tradition as a way to keep adding new members to the talented families.”
“Do you speak French and Italian because of your families’ background?”
“I speak French with my grandparents, although I never learned to read or write it. We had a school of sorts in the circus, and I learned how to speak, read, and write English in it.”
“You've led an interesting life. I can't believe you'd leave it behind for Clear Creek, Kansas.”
Or for me, was what Rose heard from Cullen. She hoped her plan to start the library would make him realize she meant to stay here, but it seemed Cullen needed more convincing.
Time to change tactics. “I've been working on another story. Would you like to read some of it? I'm having problems with one section, and I'd like your thoughts. I'll run upstairs to get it, then we can sit on the porch to read it together.”
“I'd like that,” Cullen replied as he stood to pull out Rose's chair. Rose loved that Cullen was always a gentleman.
“Back in a minute.” Besides picking up the pages in her room, she'd spritz her favorite perfume behind her ears as part of her evening plan.
The five senses, sight, smell, hearing, taste, and touch, played an essential part in the circus experience and Rose was using all of them to her advantage this evening.
The meal, especially the dessert, appealed to his taste buds. When he smelled the perfume, he’d associate her with roses. Next would be hearing her voice reading the pages she wrote for this evening. Then seeing and feeling her touch would, hopefully, lead to the proposal Rose desired.
Chapter 10
Cullen squeezed his hands in tight balls, trying not to touch Rose as they sat side by side on the porch swing. What was wrong with him? He wanted to pet Rose like a cat. Stroke her soft, shiny hair, run his hands down her back, lean in to smell her sweet scent.
Or was that his mother’s rose bush below the porch he was smelling? He leaned closer to Rose as she scanned her page in the waning evening light. No, the heady scent was radiating from Rose.
Cullen leaned back, easing his arm around the back of the porch swing, and Rose’s shoulders. How he’d love to cup her shoulder and pull her against his chest.
Did she put something in that cherry cobbler? He did have three servings, and he could have eaten more if there had been any left.
If Rose kept baking tasty treats like that, her husband would be a happy man for life.
“I can't quite describe this right, so I'd like for you to help me with it. Turn towards me, and we'll act it out after I read the scene.”
Cullen turned toward Rose, waiting to see what she needed him to do.
“This is what I've written so far.” Rose cleared her throat and started reading.
“She laid her dainty hand against his massive chest. She could feel his heartbeat, strong and steady under her palm. He, in turn, brushed the back of his hand against her soft cheek, wondering what it would be like to kiss her soft pink lips.
“Slowly, he moved his hands to her waist pulling her tight against his chest. She moved her hand up from his chest to wrap her arms around his neck. She could feel his heartbeat speed up as her bosom pressed against his body.”
Cullen's breath stopped for a second until he remembered he had to breathe to hear the rest of Rose’s scene. The thoughts racing through his brain was doing something to his body.
“She licked her lower lip, and he had to taste her succulent lips. He leaned forward until there was just a hair's width between their lips. 'I need you,' he whispered before lightly touching her lips once, and again, until fully pressing his lips to seal against hers in the act of passion. He'd never loved anyone as much as he loved her.”
Cullen watched transfixed as Rose laid the piece of paper on the table beside the swing.
“All right. I have this section memorized, so let's act it out to see if it works.”
Reality hit Cullen full force. What? Rose wants to act this out? Here? Now?
“I start first. She laid her dainty hand against his massive chest. She could feel his heartbeat, strong and steady under her palm.”
Cullen looked down as Rose placed her hand on his heart. One second later, his heart was racing like one of Hilda Wilerson's racehorses.
“He, in turn, brushed the back of his hand against her silken cheek, wondering what it would be like to kiss her soft pink lips.
“Touch my cheek, Cullen.”
Cullen brushed her cheek. It was as soft as peach fuzz.
“Slowly, he moved his hands to her waist pulling her tight against his chest.
“Wrap your hands on either side of my waist, Cullen.”
Cullen slid his hands down to hold her tiny waist right above her hips. Her waist was so small his hands could almost reach around her middle with his fingers.
“She moved her hand up from his chest to wrap her arms around his neck. She could feel his heartbeat speed up as her bosom pressed against his body.”
Rose's scent wafted around him as she pressed her body against his and wrapped her right arm around his neck. He realized her left arm rested against the outside of his hand, out of the way so she could press against his chest. Cullen's heart raced out of control.
“She licked her lower lip, and he had to taste her succulent lips.” Cullen watched as Rose licked her lips, then sighed.
“He leaned forward until there was just a hair's width between their lips.”
Cullen stared into Rose's wide blue eyes as their faces inched towards each other.
“I need you, he whispered before lightly touching her lips once, and again, until fully pressing his lips to seal against hers in the act of passion. He'd never loved anyone as much as he loved her.”
Cullen touched Rose's upturned lips with his own, lightly at first, exploring the texture and taste of Rose's lips before pressing harder and then pulling Rose on his lap.
He'd never kissed a woman before, other than a quick peck on his mother's check. This felt so good. Why hadn't he explored kissing before? Mack was right to kiss every woman at the New Year's Eve parties.
Cullen kept kissing Rose, although his hands roamed up her body to cup her face in his big hands. Rose may be tiny, but she wasn’t timid kissing him in return. Cullen relished the feel of her bosom pressed against his chest while she exchanged soft and bold kisses with him.
If this is what marriage would be like with Rose, he was ready to propose.
“Oh, my,” Rose said as she inched her mouth away from his. Cullen’s lips wanted to connect again, but he needed to breathe fi
rst.
Rose’s face relaxed, and she grinned, ear to ear.
“I think we acted out that scene perfectly,” Rose said as she wiggled off Cullen’s lap and back onto the swing.
Acted? They were acting out this love scene?
“Shall I read another scene and we act it out too?”
Oh Deuteronomy. What had he just fallen for? Rose just proved women couldn’t be trusted, just like his real mother. Cullen had been fooled by Rose’s charms just as Charlie had been duped by his soiled-dove mother.
Now he was mad besides embarrassed. Cullen pushed out of the swing hard enough it rocked backward, catching Rose off guard to fling her hard on the porch floor.
Cullen’s temper deflated to despair, and he picked up Rose, who had fallen on her left shoulder. He sat down on the porch swing, cradling Rose protectively in his lap.
“Oh, I’m so sorry, Rose. I didn’t mean to hurt you.” Cullen gently massaged her shoulder, hoping to ease the pain he’d caused.
“Why did you get mad?” Rose asked as she leaned against his chest.
How could he think when Rose was so close and smelled so sweet?
“I don’t like being played the fool, Rose.”
“Because I wanted you to kiss me?”
“To act out the scene,” Cullen reminded Rose, wishing she couldn’t feel his booming heartbeat, but she was still plastered against his chest.
“Okay, I confess I wrote the scene because I’ve never been kissed. How can I write about kissing in my stories if I’ve never done it myself?”
“Pretty you, hasn’t been kissed? Surely, you’re joking. I bet you’ve had dozens of men court you.” Cullen felt a tinge of pride being the first one who kissed Rose though.
“Couldn’t happen with us always traveling,” Rose sighed. It was another thing the circus had taken away from Rose, the joys of courting and falling in love.
“I really liked kissing you, Cullen and would like to do it again. And not for research purposes either.”
Cullen admitted to himself he’d like to do it again too, now that Rose explained why she tricked him.
“You liked my kisses?” Cullen couldn’t help the smile trying to spread across his face.
“I loved how your kisses made my heart flutter and my toes curl. I know it sounds silly, but if this is what courting and marriage feel like, I want more.” Rose leaned forward, looking as if she wanted to kiss him again.
Was love and kissing what made Angus, Fergus, and Mack smile whenever they mentioned their wives? Why had he never courted a girl? Cullen grew up watching his adoptive parents show affection to each other.
But he’d always shunned giving affection because his mother wouldn’t—or couldn’t—give it to him. But why was he letting the past direct his life now? Angus’ words bounced in his head. Get over it.
Cullen had the chance to have a wife and a father in his life if he’d set aside his past anger and hurts. Could he do it? Maybe, if Rose helped him.
Cullen gently cupped Rose’s cheeks and lightly kissed her lips. “How about we try out some more scenes for your book? I think we both need the practice.”
“Oh, I’d like that, Cullen,” Rose purred as she kissed the corner of his mouth, his chin, his jaw and below his left ear.
Cullen would have to say the books of the Bible frontward to backward ten times after he left Rose tonight, or else he’d never calm his mind and body down. He couldn’t help wondering if kissing someone was always this good, or if it was because he was kissing Rose.
Mack kissed a lot of women, but Mack knew the first time he saw Doctor Pansy, she was the one he wanted to spend the rest of his life with.
Was Rose Cullen’s special person? He’d need more kisses to find out. What did Rose call it? Research? Yeah, he wanted to do a lot of research with Rose now.
Chapter 11
Wednesday
“How's the brisket, Charlie?” Rose asked as she watched the man saw through his piece of meat. Was his slice not tender, or didn't she bake it long enough? Tonight's meal didn't turn out as well as last night's. She should have gotten the brisket in the oven sooner, but she stopped and talked to Helen Paulson after buying the meat at the meat market, and time got away from her.
“Just fine since I didn't have to cook it myself, Miss Rose,” Charlie winked at her, but she knew it hadn’t been in the oven long enough.
“Cornbread is mighty tasty,” Pastor said as he wiped another swipe of butter across his piece. Rose had baked the cornbread too long, and it was dry, hence the need for lots of butter.
And the mashed potatoes had hard bits of potatoes in them since she didn't let them cook long enough, and the gravy was lumpy and salty.
Rose was almost in tears before Cullen and Charlie arrived, but Kaitlyn's hug and stories of her own cooking failures made Rose realize every meal wouldn't come out perfect every time, let alone the first time.
“Cullen? How's your meat?” Rose hated to ask, but he was the one she wanted to impress.
Cullen looked at his mother first, who raised her eyebrow at him. Honestly! Couldn't the man speak without checking with his mother first!
“Not bad for your first attempt with a brisket, Rose. Depending on the age of the bovine, this cut of meat can be tender or tough, no matter how long you bake it.”
“Oh. Thank you for telling me that.” Maybe it wasn't her lack of cooking knowledge that had made the meat tough. She'd ask more questions from Adolph about cuts of meat in the future.
Then Rose saw Pastor give a nod of approval to Cullen as if Cullen had said the right thing to appease her. Well, Rose knew marriage was a mix of giving and take.
No one spoke around the table as they chewed their meat. It was going to be an awkward meal.
“I do believe this brisket was from an old cow, Rose. We'll bake the rest of the meat more tonight to see if it becomes tender, and if not, I'll show you how to grind the meat for sandwiches.”
Everyone, except for Charlie, switched to the rest of the meal, now knowing they didn't have to keep chewing the tough meat.
Rose waited until Charlie swallowed his mouthful before asking him a question. She hated to see him still trying to tackle the meat.
“Charlie, Cullen never told me how you and his mother met,” Rose asked.
Cullen dropped his fork, causing a lump of potatoes and gravy to fling onto his shirt. Rose noticed the silent signals between Pastor and Kaitlyn as Cullen wiped the mess on his shirt with his cloth napkin.
“That's because we've ah...never talked about it before. But I would like to, if that's alright with you, Cullen.”
Cullen nodded but stared at his plate instead of eating.
“Mary Elizabeth and I—”
“Wait. I thought my mother's name was Dolly,” Cullen interrupted Charlie.
“That was her 'stage' name, Cullen. Her real name was Mary Elizabeth O’Malley.”
“Why didn't I know that?”
“Probably because she was never called by her real name in the brothel. I met her and her husband in Fort Riley—”
“Husband? My mother was married? Unbelievable!” Cullen growled as he rose from his chair and stared at Charlie.
“Cullen,” Pastor waved at Cullen, “please sit down and listen to Charlie's story.”
With reluctance, Cullen sat down, but he continued to glare at Charlie.
“Sergeant O’Malley and I served together in Fort Riley, protecting the area before and during the war. He died in an Indian ambush in ‘62 and is buried in the fort cemetery. Your mother was, of course, distraught and heavy with child. Their son was born shortly after Mary Elizabeth received the news of her husband's death, but it didn't survive. Riley Cullen O’Malley is also buried at Fort Riley.”
“I had a brother?” Cullen asked, now that the news sunk in.
“Yes, you did. Mary Elizabeth mourned them both very much, and one night, I... consoled her, resulting in you, Cullen.”
“Why
didn't you marry her?”
“Shortly after that night, our troop took off for Fort Leavenworth because the Confederacy was trying to march over Kansas to get to the Colorado gold mines. I was on the east side of the state when you were born in Fort Riley, Cullen.”
“I wasn't born in the brothel?” Rose ached to move over to Cullen and put her arms around his shoulders. Why hadn't he known of this before?
“No. Why did you think that?”
“Because I've never known the facts,” Cullen glared at Pastor.
“We didn't know anything about you when we picked you up, Cullen. All we knew, was that your name was Cullen, and your mother's name was Dolly,” Pastor calmly answered back.
“And you've refused to listen to me when I've tried to tell you anything, Cullen,” Charlie added with a touch of irritation. “I've been here three months, and you haven't spent five minutes with me, at least until you brought Rose over to visit.”
“I'm sorry, Charlie. Go on. When did you find out you had a son?” Cullen crossed his arms over his chest and stared at Charlie.
“When my troop went back to Fort Riley. I figured Mary Elizabeth would have remarried or moved off the fort, but I found her, and you, staying with another woman. You were six months old that day.” Charlie had a faint smile on his face as if it was a good memory.
“What was the date? I don't know my birth date.”
Rose was shocked at Cullen's pained admission. How sad not to know your birthday.
“May sixteenth, 1864,” Charlie said.
“We always celebrated Cullen's birthday on the day we found him, June 18th, since we didn't know his real date,” Kaitlyn answered. The woman wiped a tear from her cheek. This must be as hard for Kaitlyn and Pastor to hear the story of the boy they’d raised, as much as it was for Cullen.
“At least you guessed the year right, Ma,” Cullen said as he reached his hand across the table to Kaitlyn. Rose's eyes threatened to tear as Cullen squeezed his ma’s hand for a long moment.
“I wanted to marry your mother when I found out, but she said she didn't want to bury another husband. The war casualties were a constant reminder of the times we lived in.
Cullen's Love (Grooms With Honor Book 5) Page 7