I wasn’t sure if she knew it, but I’d given her a piece of myself. And I didn’t ever want it back.
I pressed my lips against her forehead and she stirred.
“Hi,” she said, lifting her head to look at me. Her voice was sleepy.
“Sorry,” I said. “Did I wake you?”
“I wasn’t sleeping,” she said. “Just relaxed.”
I touched her face and kissed her mouth, slow and soft. A gentle caress of my lips against hers.
“Thank you,” she said.
“For what?”
“For everything,” she said. “For keeping me safe the other night. For forgiving me. For not giving up on me.”
“You’re worth it,” I said. “But no more of that, okay?”
“No,” she said. “I’m not using, Seb. I promise. Not like that. I took some stuff the other night, but that was the first time since I met you. And Olivia flushed the rest of what I had down the toilet.”
“Good,” I said. “I guess you’re not angry with me for calling Mrs. Harper?”
“No, I’m not angry,” she said. “But why did you?”
“I had to do something,” I said. “I couldn’t sit back and watch you self-destruct.”
“So you brought in the big guns,” she said with a little laugh.
“Can you blame me?” I asked. “I knew they cared about you, and they’d find a way to help. I wasn’t exactly expecting to pick up Olivia at the airport today, but she called this morning.”
“I still can’t believe she came. I didn’t think she ever wanted to see me again. And then, there she was, knocking on my door. Here, in Iowa.” She paused, her fingers absently caressing my chest. “I didn’t think you wanted to see me again, either.”
“Of course I did.” I rolled her onto her back and leaned over her. “I’m in love with you, Brooke. I don’t say that lightly. If I’m going to do something, I give it my all. I learned that when I was a wrestler. So if we do this, I’m going all in. I’m too familiar with my own mortality for casual flings or that friends-with-benefits bullshit. I want to be with you. But I need you to want to be with me too.”
She looked into my eyes and I could see her taking it in. Processing what I said, and what it meant. I was glad she didn’t answer right away. This was important. I’d held back, trying to hide my feelings from her, because I hadn’t known if she was capable of returning them. If she wasn’t, I had to stop this before it went any further, regardless of how much I wanted her. How much I loved her. Because me loving her would never be enough if she couldn’t love me back.
But I knew it was there, inside her. I’d felt it in her body. In the way she’d responded to me. In the way she’d surrendered. Heard it in the very breaths she took. She’d said it, let the words escape her lips, and I’d heard the truth of them. I knew she loved me. But she had to know it too.
Her eyes moved to my chest. To the scar that ran down the center, right between my pecs. She trailed her fingers across the raised skin, caressing me with a light touch, then met my eyes.
“I’m in love with you, too. I want to be with you. More than anything.”
I leaned down and kissed her. She tasted so good. So sweet. There were so many things I wanted to show her. Do with her. It was as if a whole new world had opened—a world in which maybe Brooke Summerlin could really be mine.
She giggled and I pulled away. “Is my beard tickling your face?”
“A little.” She stroked my jaw. “But I love it.”
“How do you feel now?” I asked.
The corners of her mouth turned up and her eyes sparkled. “Happy.”
I leaned in and kissed the delicate skin below her ear. Ran my hand up her body, from her hip to her breast. Her nipple hardened against my palm and she moaned softly.
“Again? You can’t be—”
I pressed my hard erection against her. “Yes, I can.”
“Oh my god,” she said, her voice breathy. “But what about Olivia?”
I squeezed her round breast, enjoying the firmness in my hand. Kissed her neck again. “What about her?”
“She’ll probably be back soon.”
“Don’t worry, Charlie will keep her entertained.” I kissed my way down her neck to her collarbone. “You’re mine now. I’m not sharing you tonight.”
She lifted her arms above her head while my mouth made its way to her tits. They were so perfect. I kissed around her nipple, then slid my tongue along the hard peak. She sighed, her body twitching. I took it in my mouth, pinching her other nipple gently between my thumb and forefinger while I sucked. Licked. Kissed. Sucked again. I loved the taste of her skin. The feel of her tits in my mouth.
“Oh my god, Sebastian,” she said. “How do you do this to me?”
I groaned, kissing my way down her stomach. Past the swell of her hips. Pressed my lips into the crease of her thigh. I pushed her legs open and started with slow swipes of my tongue. Exploring. Tasting. Her soft sighs were music to my ears. I loved making her feel good.
She writhed and whimpered as I sucked on her clit. Massaged her with my tongue. Her pussy tasted so fucking good. Holding her body captive like this was such a rush. The way she moved and moaned. Breathy whispers of my name. She slid her fingers through my hair and rolled her hips. I felt her getting close, but I wasn’t ready to let her finish.
I stopped and she gasped. She was breathing hard, her body tense. My cock was rock solid, aching to be inside her again. Grabbing her hips, I flipped her over and she got onto her hands and knees. After rolling on another condom, I positioned myself behind her and leaned down.
“I want to fuck you again,” I growled into her ear. “Hard this time.”
“Yes,” she said, and the desperation in her voice drove me insane. “God yes, fuck me hard, Sebastian. Now.”
She was so wet, I slid in easily. Her ass pressed against my groin as she arched her back. I gave her a few gentle thrusts, and then I unleashed.
I plowed into her, hard and fast. My hands held tight to her hips, pulling her back as I drove my cock in. Her hair spilled across her back and shoulders, dark against her skin. The lines of her back, narrow waist, and round hips looked amazing—soft feminine curves. She looked back at me over her shoulder, her eyes glassy, her lips parted. So fucking beautiful.
“Harder,” she said.
I gave her what she wanted, slamming into her pussy over and over, grunting with every thrust. My heart beat wildly and the tension in my groin built fast. I pounded her again and again, while she called out her ecstasy. We were loud and uninhibited, letting passion sweep us away.
I wanted to give her everything. Take away all her pain. I wanted to fuck the sadness out of her—see nothing but desire in her eyes.
My muscles were taut, flexing hard. I took one of her wrists and pulled her arm back. She lowered her chest to the bed and I grabbed her other arm. She wrapped her hands around my wrists as I held hers, her arms stretched out behind her. With her ass in the air and her body in my control, I fucked her relentlessly.
Her throaty moans spurred me on, the heat of her pussy driving me crazy. Where our first time had been passionate and tender, this time I released the animal inside me. The drive to possess her. Own her. Love her with my body with all the ferocity of a predator.
“Oh fuck,” she said, her voice a whimper. “Fuck, yes… oh god… yes… harder.”
The walls of her pussy tightened, the pressure agonizing. My balls drew up tight, almost ready to explode. I thrust again and felt her tumble over the edge. She cried out, her face almost buried in the mattress, as she came hard all over me.
I couldn’t hold it in any longer. Like a bomb going off, I detonated inside her. Hard, hot pulses of my cock overwhelmed me. My mind went blank and I kept fucking her, grunting through the biggest fucking orgasm I’d ever had.
I slowed, my chest heaving with ragged breaths. I let go of her wrists and pulled out. She collapsed onto the bed, breathing hard, her hai
r damp and tangled.
Still trying to catch my breath, I got up to deal with the condom, then fell back in bed with her. She hadn’t moved. I gathered her up in my arms and held her close. She laid her cheek against my chest and I slid my fingers through her hair.
The intensity of the moment made my chest feel tight. Even broken as she was, she’d been so vulnerable with me. Trusted me so completely. I wanted to engulf her with my arms, cocoon her with my strength. She held me with the same force and severity. The power of our connection was mind-blowing. I’d known I loved her for months, but this… This was raw and open and beautiful.
“I love you,” she whispered.
I squeezed her, kissing her head. “I love you too, Brooke. More than I know how to say.”
27
Brooke
“Hey, Joe.” I closed the door to the bookstore as quickly as possible to stop the blast of cold air. It was freezing out there. “How’s it going?”
Joe leaned against a tall stool behind the front counter, an open book in his hands. “Quiet. Are you early?”
“Yeah,” I said. “I had an appointment and it was easier to come straight here, rather than go home. I’ll just go sit in the back for a few if you don’t mind.”
He nodded. “No problem.”
I went into the back and sat down at the little table, wondering if Joe would let me put a space heater back here. I huddled down in my thick coat and rubbed my hands together. Sebastian had warned me winter was going to be cold. As far as I was concerned, I was surprised it wasn’t snowing. And it was only October.
I was glad I had a little time before I had to be on the clock. My appointment had been with my new therapist, and even though we hadn’t delved too deeply into anything serious, it had been emotionally draining.
Although logically I could see the benefits of therapy, I wasn’t convinced it was right for me. Or maybe I just hadn’t found the right therapist. But I’d promised Sebastian I would give it a shot, and Olivia had backed him up. I’d complained about them ganging up on me, but they hadn’t backed down. So off to therapy I went, once a week on Wednesdays.
My phone dinged with a text. I fished it out of my handbag.
Seb: Hey, love. I have class tonight but can I come over later?
Me: You better. I miss you.
Seb: Miss you too. At work?
Me: Yep. It’s cold in here.
Seb: Don’t worry, I’ll warm you up.
Me: Can’t wait. Love you.
Seb: Love you too, chilly girl.
I smiled and touched his name on the screen. It felt so good to smile. I’d been doing a lot more of it since Sebastian and I had gotten together. It had been about a month since that unbelievable day when he’d kissed me… made love to me… then fucked me into oblivion. I was so in love with him, sometimes I didn’t know what to do with myself.
But I still carried a hint of fear. What if I wasn’t strong enough to love him the way he deserved? He was so big and powerful. So fierce and determined. I hoped my spirit had the strength to match his.
With a little time left to kill, I pulled out my notebook. I wrote down a few lines that had been bouncing around in my head all morning.
The future
Has a face
Where it did not before
Potential, and hope, and possibility
But only
If the darkness
Always looming
Does not prevail
It was short, and simple. But I looked at my words and left them as they were—satisfied. For now, at least. Sometimes I needed pages and pages to express my thoughts. Other times a few lines felt right.
I closed the notebook and put it away. I’d filled the original one Sebastian had given me, and a few more since then. This one had a deep orange and blue paisley cover. It almost matched my sweater.
When it was time for my shift, I reluctantly left my coat on a hook and came out into the shop. Although now that I’d been inside for a little while, I wasn’t all that cold.
Joe glanced up from his book. He seemed a bit melancholy. “You can close up early tonight if it’s still a ghost town.”
“Okay,” I said. “Is everything all right?”
He closed his book and set it on the counter. “Yes, fine. Business has been so slow. There are always ups and downs, but I’m getting a little worried.”
I wasn’t surprised to hear that—it had been slow—but I hated seeing Joe look so stressed.
“Well, if you need to cut back my hours or anything, just let me know,” I said.
He smiled. “It’s not so bad as all that, yet. And things usually pick up around the holidays. It just seems like it gets slower and slower every year.”
Some days we had a lot of customers, but I often wondered how Joe managed to keep the place open. I glanced over at the curtained-off area on the far side of the store. There was a counter there that had once been a little café, serving coffee and tea. “Have you thought about reopening the café counter? It might give people more of a reason to come in if they could get something warm to drink. Especially with the weather getting colder.”
“It didn’t seem to make much of a difference when I had it open before,” he said.
I tilted my head and took a good look at the space. “Was it just like this? The layout, I mean. Did you have places to sit?”
“There were two tables,” he said.
I walked toward the curtained-off nook, thinking about the current placement of the bookshelves. There was a lot of wasted space. The building was sizable, and Joe had everything spread out. It did make it feel open and airy, but it wasn’t a very efficient use of the square footage.
“What if we had more seating?” I asked. “Not just a couple of tables, put there as an afterthought, but a whole section. There’s room if we move things around.” I gestured toward the rear of the store. “And we’re using that whole area for storage, but couldn’t we put that stuff in the back room? It would free up a ton of space.”
“Space for what?”
“For people.” I paused for a moment, thinking. “What if this wasn’t just a bookstore? What if it was like… a gathering place? We need ways to encourage people to come in and shop here, instead of ordering online or going to one of the big chain stores.”
“Well, sure,” he said. “That’s why we have our local authors section, and the staff recommendations. Those are popular with customers.”
“Yeah, but is it enough?” I asked. “If you had places for people to sit, you could host some of those local authors. Invite them to do readings. Open it up to book clubs.” My mind spun with the possibilities. “You could have open mic nights for poets or even acoustic musicians. This is a college town. College kids love that stuff.”
He nodded slowly, his eyes moving around the space. “But I’ve never had much luck getting the college crowd in here.”
“They’d come if you gave them a cool place to hang out,” I said. “All we’d have to do is organize a few poetry nights or something, post fliers around campus, and I bet it would be packed.”
“I’d have to hire someone to run the café,” he said. “I tried before, but I don’t know anything about operating that sort of business. Books, I know. Overpriced coffee? Not so much.”
“Okay, but let’s say you could hire someone,” I said. “Or lease the space and let someone bring their own small business in here. What about the rest of it?”
“I’m open to it,” he said. “Although with my knee, I can’t do any of the rearranging. That’s why I’ve left it like this for so long. The bookshelves are too heavy for me to move around.”
I grinned. “Don’t worry. I have the muscle covered.”
He laughed. “That’s right, I’ve met your boyfriend.”
I felt a surge of excitement. “So, we can do this?”
He narrowed his eyes and his white mustache twitched.
“How about this,” I said. “I’ll see what I
can find as far as seating and give you the costs. Rearranging the layout is no problem, Sebastian and our friend Charlie can help with that. And I’ll come up with some ideas for events. I’ll keep the costs down. And if you need help with getting the café going again, I can do that too.”
“It’s very hard to say no to all of that,” he said.
“I think this could be really great,” I said. “I won’t pretend like I know what I’m doing, exactly, but I’ll do my best.”
“All right,” he said. “But I need to approve the new layout first.”
“Of course,” I said.
“Thank you, Brooke. It’s good to have someone in here with a little enthusiasm,” he said, smiling again. “Well, it’s time for me to go home. Like I said, close up early. You don’t need to sit around if there aren’t any customers.”
“I will. Thanks, Joe.”
After Joe left, I started sketching layout ideas in my notebook. I had a few customers in the late afternoon, but after that, all was quiet. I closed the shop an hour early and went home.
The porch light was on, but the living room was dark when I got there. I wondered where Olivia was. She’d been here for weeks and I wasn’t sure how long she was planning to stay. At first, she’d said she could stay for a week. But a week had come and gone, and she was still here.
She’d asked if I minded, and I told her I didn’t. It was nice having her here. I got the feeling that she liked being away from Phoenix—and not living with her parents. Even though they were nice people, I didn’t blame Olivia for not wanting to live with them. She’d been on her own while she went to college, so moving home must have taken some adjusting.
Plus, we had fun together. Olivia had always been a spitfire, so we’d had our moments. Just a couple of small arguments, nothing serious. The longer she stayed, the more we fell back into the comfort of our old relationship. We loved each other like sisters, but we sometimes we fought like sisters too.
I shut the door behind me and flicked on the light. I was hungry, but I figured I’d wait for Sebastian. Maybe he’d want to grab dinner. Who was I kidding, Seb always wanted to grab food. His diet was the healthiest of anyone I’d ever known, but he was a big guy. It seemed like he was always hungry.
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