Time to step up and be a woman. She cleared her throat. “Walt, about us—”
“Don’t worry, Kate. I’m not here to take you to dinner.” He gave a small smile that held more sadness than humor. “I realize you most likely have…other plans.”
“Yes,” she said softly, guilt twisting in her gut. “I’m sorry. I should have told you earlier.”
He lifted a hand and caressed the side of her face. “I told myself I wouldn’t say anything, but I can’t help it. You’re too good for him, Caitleen.”
Her throat tightened and she lowered her gaze. Damn, she really wished people would stop pointing out how bad Todd was for her.
“But that’s not why I dropped by,” Walt said quickly. “I just wanted to mention that I saw something a little out of place the other day. Penny was snooping around after hours, peering in your shop, and scurrying off when I came out to see what was going on.”
“Penny?” Kate’s brows drew together as she thought of the owner of the local pie shop. “Snooping around? Are you sure?”
Walt grinned. “Can’t mistake hair like that. Anyway, just thought I’d mention it. I know nothing’s happened in awhile, but it never hurts to be careful.” He paused and slowly traced his finger down her jawline. “And you should be careful, Caitleen.”
She knew he was referring to more than her business but refused to acknowledge the underlying hint that Todd was bad news.
The sound of the door opening had her gaze swinging to the doorway.
“Todd.” Her face flushed with a guilt that was completely unnecessary as she stepped away from Walt. “Hey.”
“I should be going.” Walt cleared his throat and then moved toward the door.
When he passed Todd, Kate didn’t miss the challenging look the men exchanged.
Her throat tightened and she folded her arms across her chest. The door opened and then shut with Walt’s exit.
“Hi,” she said softly. “I was just closing shop.”
Todd nodded, his expression unreadable. “Let’s head out.”
In his truck Todd didn’t say much, and her unease grew. He seemed distant, a little angry. But why? Because of Walt? That would make no sense.
With the heat blaring on her face she grew uncomfortably warm and shifted, tugging loose her scarf.
“What was Chapman sniffing around for?”
Something in her gut started to simmer, annoyed and a little angry at his curt and sudden question.
“He came by to mention he saw Penny snooping around my shop,” she said stiffly. “We used to have dinner on Fridays, but he figured out those probably wouldn’t be happening for awhile.”
“Awhile?”
The simmering turned into a boil. Her mouth tightened. “Where are you going with this? What would it even matter if I kept seeing Walt?”
“It would matter because you’re sleeping with me,” he said tightly.
Her sharp response back died on her lips as he turned the truck abruptly down a small road that led to the beach. The road was generally deserted this time of year, and especially this time of night.
“What are we doing here?” she asked unevenly.
His gaze glittered as he turned in his seat and snagged her scarf, unwinding it from her neck.
“I want you.”
Her heart threatened to gallop out of her chest and her sex clenched with excitement. But her mind wasn’t ready to give up without a fight.
“You can’t avoid our discussion by deciding you want to fuck me,” she said crudely.
“Can’t I?” He arched a brow as he unfastened her seatbelt, his expression so cocky she wanted to slap it off his face.
He climbed out of the driver’s seat and over to the passenger side. He reached down beside her and pulled something that had her seat sliding back and reclining.
“Todd—”
“Then push me away,” he challenged, deftly unzipping her jacket and sliding a hand beneath her shirt to find her breast. “Tell me to leave you alone, Kate.”
He kneaded her flesh and she cried out despite herself, her nipple tightening into his palm. Damn him, he knew her too well. Was taking advantage of the fact that she couldn’t deny him.
“Yeah, I didn’t think so.”
His mouth crushed down on hers and she gave up trying to fight him. She didn’t want to anymore, because she wanted this moment as much as he did. And she hated herself for it.
The slide of her zipper going down was the only warning she got before Todd pulled her jeans and panties from her body. Then his hand was back between her legs, his finger plunging inside her slick channel.
Pleasure rocketed through her and her hips arched off the leather seat.
Todd’s mouth commandeered hers, while he brought her to a quick, intense orgasm with knowing fingers. Her body still trembled when he reached into the glove compartment for a condom.
He unzipped his jeans and pulled himself free from his boxers, sheathing himself with the condom all in probably under a minute.
Kate’s heart slammed in her chest and her body ached for him inside her. Todd leaned over her, his knees braced against the seat, one hand gripping the leather seat while the other guided his cock inside her.
She moaned, her head falling back against the seat as he buried himself to the hilt. She clung to the Gore-tex jacket that he hadn’t bothered to remove, while he pounded into her.
“Who’s inside you, Kate?” he demanded raggedly.
She shook her head, wanting to salvage a little of her pride. But then he reached between them and rubbed her clit, his mouth slanting over hers again.
When he lifted his head a moment later she was dazed and shaking with pleasure.
“Say my name, Kate.”
“Todd,” she choked out.
“Damn right.”
And then his mouth was on hers again. He was almost rough. Mindless, taking her in a way he’d never done before—not even that first night. It thrilled her and yet also left a seed of unease inside in her belly.
Sensation built inside her as he rubbed her clit faster and moved harder inside of her. And then she was there, cresting that climax peak and crying out her release, just as Todd had his.
He fell heavily on her, burying his face against her neck. Kate slowly fell back to reality, aware of her heart slamming around in her chest and the seatbelt receptacle biting into her hip.
And then it realization slammed into her. What had just happened, what she’d let happen. Humiliation had her cheeks burning and her hands—which had been clutching him—thrusting him away.
Todd stiffened and cursed, lifting his head.
“Oh my God,” he muttered and eased off her. “Kate, I don’t know what came—”
Her palm glanced across his face before she could stop it. She stared at him in the fading light, saw his jaw flex and the shock in his gaze. Watched the red marks of her fingers appear on his cheek.
Nausea swelled in her stomach and she bit her lip, tears burning at the back of her eyes.
“I don’t deserve to be treated like this,” she said quietly, struggling to keep her voice even. “Yes, Todd, what did come over you?”
He closed his eyes and thrust a hand through his hair, looking heartbreakingly handsome and conflicted.
“I don’t know, Kate.”
“Yes, you do. You acted like I was your possession.” She gave a short laugh, feeling ridiculously exposed and vulnerable being half-naked with her jeans and panties sitting on the floor of the truck. “An object for you just to use whenever you had the whim to. You get like that when I’m with Walt.”
“You’re right. I’m jealous,” he finally admitted quietly and moved back into the driver’s seat.
“Yes, you are. Though I’m surprised you would admit it. Why are you jealous, Todd?” she pressed on, not caring that she was tearing apart their unspoken agreement of casual sex for a couple weeks. “You don’t want to be exclusive with me. And you don’t do rel
ationships. So why are you jealous?”
Todd shook his head and then sighed. “I don’t like the idea of you with anybody else.”
The tears that had threatened flooded her eyes. She couldn’t do this anymore. Couldn’t deny what was in her heart and pretend that just sex for a couple of weeks would be enough. That she could walk out unscathed.
She grabbed her discarded clothes and slid back into them.
“Well, likewise, Todd,” she said miserably. “I don’t like the idea of you with anybody else. I don’t like walking around town and wondering what women you’ve slept with and who will be next after me.”
His face tightened with distress. “Kate—”
“I shouldn’t even want someone like you, Todd. That’s the irony of it. Not after what happened with Andrew.”
“You can’t compare me to him. I’m nothing like that asshole,” he said savagely.
“You’re not. You’re caring, funny and charming. And most of the time a wonderfully attentive lover.” A whimsical smile flitted across her face. “You have so much love to give, Todd. But you won’t let yourself. And I’m done trying to figure out why. Hoping deep down that maybe I can be the one to change you.”
“You don’t want my love, Kate.”
“Why wouldn’t I? When a girl loves someone, she generally wants that love to be reciprocated.”
She should’ve regretted the words, especially when he paled and seemed to scoot further away from her in his seat.
“You’re not in love with me, Kate. You’re confused because I was your first.”
“That’s bull crap. I would’ve never let you take me like you just did—like some whore getting paid by the hour—if I didn’t love you, Todd.” Her voice trembled and tears slid down her cheek. “But I can’t do it anymore. I can’t go on for another week, a month, or however long until you tire of me.”
Panic flickered in Todd’s eyes and he reached for her, but she shook her head and moved away until the door handle bit into her lower back. Grabbing her purse off the truck floor, she clutched it in her hand.
“You’re just upset right now, Kate,” he said desperately. “Please, we can work this out—”
“I don’t want to work out sex. I want you to love me.”
He flinched. “I can’t.”
“Can’t, or won’t? What or who made you into a guy who jumps from bed to bed, afraid to commit to any woman?”
“Let’s just say you weren’t the only one traumatized by your first relationship, all right?” he said thickly.
Kate had reached for the door handle but paused, her pulse quickening at this gleam of new information. “How so?”
Todd didn’t answer right away. “I fell in love when I was eighteen. I was ready to give up college to stay in Wyattsville and marry her.”
Kate frowned, trying to remember if Todd had ever been serious about anyone. But then when he’d been eighteen she’d only been fourteen or fifteen and completely oblivious to his social life.
“And what happened?”
Todd looked straight ahead as he murmured, “She never wanted me. She’d been sleeping with me, using me to get closer to Trevor.”
Kate winced. She knew how that must have affected him. The betrayal, shock, and deep burning anger. It wasn’t unlike what had happened to her. And it had taken her how long before she’d been ready to move on? To trust a man again?
She tried not to get too excited by the spark of hope that lit inside her. That maybe, just maybe, there was hope for Todd.
Touching his arm gently, she murmured, “Oh, God, I’m sorry, Todd. Really, I know how that must’ve torn you up. But can’t you see what you’re doing? You’re channeling your bitterness at her on every woman you sleep—”
“Goddamn it, don’t try to analyze me, Kate,” he said tersely, shrugging off her touch. “My dating habits have nothing to do with that bitch. And you knew what you were getting into when you went to bed with me.”
“Dating habits? Try sex habits. You don’t date, Todd. You jump from bed to bed, thinking any chick would be happy to screw you because you’re a fireman.” Her nose wrinkled with scorn and her stomach clenched. “And thank you for the poignant reminder on why I need to walk away now. Yes, I knew what I was getting into, and now I know why I need to get out.”
She pulled on the door handle and jumped down before he could stop her. She took off, plunging down the darkened road and toward the trail that led to her house not too far away. The truck couldn’t drive down the trail, which meant Todd couldn’t follow after her unless he was on foot. But she heard nothing, which meant she was safe.
Alone in the darkness, she let out a sob and allowed the rest of the tears to fall.
Chapter Thirteen
He couldn’t sleep. Again. Todd stared at the empty side of the bed and closed his eyes before getting up. He hadn’t been able to kick the tightness in his chest and overwhelming sense of despondency since Kate had run from him last night.
Her words kept pounding home, relentless and unforgiving. Her statements mixed with Tyson’s and together they left a pretty damning image of him. But it wasn’t undeserved.
How had he never seen it before? Just how much of an asshole he’d turned into. All because he’d let himself fall in love so many years ago.
Or so he’d always thought he’d been in love. It was only tonight, after Kate had left the truck, had he faced the reality that he’d probably never loved Anne. Losing Anne had hurt, but it was nothing like losing Kate. And he had lost her. He’d seen it in the sad but determined glint in her eyes as she’d slipped from his truck.
Kate had held a mirror to his life tonight, showing the good, the bad and the ugly.
The ugly? The man he’d become over the years. The good? Being with Kate made him happy. Completed him a way he hadn’t realized he wanted. Needed. And the bad…how horribly he’d hurt her tonight.
Shame lanced through him as he paced his bedroom. Kate had been right, she hadn’t deserved what he’d done tonight. It had been deplorable. Never had he taken a woman like that. He’d been angry and jealous and…fucking stupid.
It was better that Kate had ended things. She deserved so much better than him.
His cell phone rang and he glanced down at in surprise. Maybe it was her. Not able to sleep. Wanting to talk and try and work things out… It was the fire station.
Swallowing the disappointment, Todd answered the call. A few minutes later he hung up and headed for the shower. Bruce had a mild case of food poisoning and they wanted him to start his shift early.
And why shouldn’t he? He sure as hell wasn’t going to spend the rest of the night sleeping.
By the time he got to the station, it was a relief to be awake and distracted. Working. Though a couple of the guys gave him sidelong glances and seemed to keep a wide girth, obviously sensing his dark mood.
An hour passed and after a hard workout in the gym, Todd glanced at his cell phone by habit to see if anyone called.
A message from Tyson reflected in the window, and Todd frowned, noting the time from late last night.
He clicked open the message, scanned it, and everything inside him went cold with fear.
Fresh blueberry muffins. Who wouldn’t appreciate them? Especially since she was coming in three hours before opening to make them.
But after tossing and turning all night, coming into work sounded like a mighty fine idea. It wasn’t the first time she’d done it. Baking had always been her way to ease stress and distract herself. Fortunately she now capitalized on it.
She hadn’t stopped thinking about Todd all night. Wondering if she’d made a huge mistake. Because this past week had literally been the best of her life. And who knows, maybe Todd would’ve come around. Maybe he’d… Oh God, who was she kidding? Todd was Todd. He would forever be the town’s Casanova.
After she left her car and arrived outside her bakery, she fumbled to unlock her shop, her fingers growing numb with cold. It
was still dark, but then, it was barely three in the morning.
When the key connected with the lock, she gave a small moan of relief and pushed open the door a minute later. She stepped inside and shut the door behind her, a shiver racking through her body.
The sounds of metal hitting the ground tore a scream from her throat.
Kate spun around, heart pounding, and scanned the darkened shop. The lights were right beside her, but she almost too terrified to hit the switch.
She finally did and the shop lit up, illuminating a man who had relief slipping through her.
“Walt,” she said in exasperation. “What are you doing here? You nearly scared me to death.”
When he didn’t answer her, just looked at her, her relief faded. She remembered that it was basically the middle of the night and there was absolutely no logical reason for Walt to be in her shop. Or holding a container of lighter fluid.
Fear washed in cold waves down her back and she cast a quick glance at the door behind her.
“I wouldn’t try it,” he warned, then, “You’re just like her, you know.”
“Like who?”
“My wife. She was a lying slut, leaving me for another man. I couldn’t let her do it.” He shook his head, his gaze narrowing. “I couldn’t let her make a fool of me.”
His wife? His wife was dead. Oh God. Had died in a fire. Her gaze slid to the bottle of lighter fluid in his hands again. Her fear tripled and her throat locked. And when she took a deep breath in to calm herself, she smelled the smoke.
She took what she hoped was an inconspicuous step backward.
“I had such high hopes for you, Caitleen. You were so innocent. It seemed all my little incidents were bringing us together just as I’d planned. Anytime something happened to your shop, you turned to me for comfort. It was so perfect.” He scowled. “Until that stupid Wyatt boy got a hold of you. Turned you into his little sex toy, didn’t he?”
Walt strode forward and wrapped his arm around her neck, dragging her away from the door as he turned off the lights at the same time, plunging them into darkness once more.
Flash Point: Holding Out for a Hero, Book 3 Page 9