“It seems that you are due for a pap-smear, so go ahead and put this,” she rummaged under the cabinets before standing back up, “gown on. The doctor should be in shortly.” She left with a wave to me and Liam.
There was a little corner in the room that had a shower curtain where I could un-dress. I slipped behind it and took my clothes off and set them neatly on the shelf then slipped the gown on. I pulled the curtain back and saw Liam sitting in the chair with his new tablet. I rolled my eyes at the ridiculously expensive gift that Mace bought before going on our trip to the mountains. He had insisted on it because of how long the drive was. He had said, “Little man needs something to do.” I guess it did come in handy though.
I hefted my ass up on the table and laid down. Liam looked up from the tablet and gazed at me in a funny way.
“What’s the matter baby?” I asked
“Why do they make you put those ugly gowns on?” He wrinkled his nose at my ‘ugly gown’ and awaited an answer.
“Because they need to be able to check me, so they make me put on the ugly gown,” I told him and tried to hold in the giggle that was threating to escape.
I heard a light knock on the door and called out, “Yes?”
My doctor, Steve, walked in and smiled warmly. I had been going here since before Liam was born, so even though he shoved his hands in my vagina every few months, I liked him.
“So what seems to be the problem Araylia?” He said as he leaned his ass against the counter directly across from me.
Why he had to ask, I’m not sure, because my information was all on the papers he had in his hands.
“I’ve been getting bad headaches for the past month and I recently started throwing up quite often.” I said as I fidgeted with my hands. I was really hoping nothing serious was wrong with me. I hoped that Steve could give me some antibiotics and send me on my way.
“When was your last period?” Steve asked as he was looking through my files he had on a clipboard.
My eyebrows immediately scrunched up.
“You think I’m pregnant?” I said in a shocked tone.
“Not necessarily, but it’s possible that’s the reason for your headaches and sickness.” His eyes moved from my files to gaze at my face. I’m sure he noticed the horrified look on my face. Right now would be the worst time to get pregnant. Mace had finally gotten used to Liam calling him daddy, and even allowing it, but he wouldn’t be prepared for a baby.
If I did end up pregnant it would mess with my plans of leaving. I couldn’t deprive him of his own child. I would have to stay around, but I was worried about his safety if he stayed around me. I brought bad things to his door step. If I didn’t leave bad things would always happen to him. Fuck! My brain screamed.
I tried remembering when my last period was so I could tell Steve I wasn’t pregnant, but I couldn’t remember. Although this wasn’t unusual it still worried me. It was more of a chance that I could be pregnant. After having Liam my periods were heavy and irregular, hence why I went on birth control.
“I…I can’t remember. But that’s normal, I haven’t had a regular period since Liam was born!” I exclaimed more to myself than to him. I was trying to reason with myself that I couldn’t be pregnant. There was no way.
“Well that’s fine honey, we’ll take some of your blood and check your hormone levels to see if they’re up.” He moved away from the counter and toward the little doctor stool that was to my right.
“Right now, I’m going to give you a pap-smear and check your cervix as well. If you are pregnant I’ll go ahead and give you a vaginal ultrasound so we can see about how far along you are,” he said as he rolled on his wheels to the end of the exam table.
He brought the stirrups out of the table and instructed me to slide my feet in them. I did as I was told and I felt the coldness of his hand touch my most private area. I hated getting pap-smears done because I felt like my privacy was being invaded, but I knew that I had to get them done so I sucked it up.
“Your cervix is closed so that’s a good indicator that you are in fact pregnant, but I still want to do a blood test to be sure,” the good ole doctor told me.
My heart sank. I didn’t even pay attention to what else he was saying. I didn’t feel the uncomfortableness of him having his fingers in my snatch. I knew…I knew without having to do the test that I was pregnant. I knew my body well enough, there was no doubt, I was pregnant. How I hadn’t figured it out sooner, I would never know. I had always been in tune with my body. The signs were there, sickness, headaches, and mood swings. God, I’m so stupid!
Steve finished up and took his gloves off then washed his hands. His mouth was moving like he was talking, but I didn’t hear a word. I think he was saying that he would be back in shortly. I don’t know. I just nodded my head and smiled like my whole world wasn’t crumbling.
As soon as the doctor shut the door I turned my head to look at my baby boy. His attention was still focused on his tablet so I just gazed at him. I wondered what it would be like having another baby running around. I inwardly cringed at the thought of telling Mace that I was pregnant. He was going to flip his lid. Actually that was an understatement if I ever heard one.
He had finally told Liam he was okay being called daddy. I know he had some heavy internal struggles raging on inside him so I know telling him I was pregnant was going to make it worse. This was the last thing we needed right now. Luke still hadn’t been transported back to Chicago, somebody was still fucking with us, and I hadn’t gotten a job yet. The timing was all wrong and I prayed that I could figure it all out.
Steve came back in about twenty minutes later and confirmed that I was indeed pregnant. Even though I knew I was, I still had a tiny sliver of hope. While he was getting the ultrasound machine hooked up I turned my head to the side on the table and silently let one lone tear drop fall. That was as far as I would let my silent pity party go. I was going to be strong and after leaving here I was going to figure out a way through all of this. I was tough, I could do it.
Steve jelled up the dildo looking wand and shoved that up me and I heard the sweetest sound fill the room. Boom-boom, boom-boom, boom-boom, my eyes welled up with tears again, but for a completely different reason.
“What. Is. That?!” Liam whisper-yelled. He had somehow moved from across the room to the table without me noticing.
I turned my head to the left and saw my boy was looking at the monitor that showed a picture of his brother or sister.
“That, my baby, is your brother or sister,” I whispered and stroked his cheek lovingly.
His dark blue eyes went as wide as saucers and his jaw dropped. He looked up at me then over to the screen, then back at me, and the screen. Finally his shock wore off and he took a hold of my hand.
He bent down and whispered, “He needs to be a boy. I need a brother to play football with when I’m older.”
I laughed and felt somewhat happy tears fall unchecked down my cheeks. Leave up to Liam to cheer me up without him even having to try.
“You are about 6 weeks along, congratulations!” Steve told me as he was pulling the wand out of me. He printed off a couple of pictures for me then told me to see the front desk to make another appointment.
“Hurry up mom! We needs to tell daddy!” Liam was jumping up and down in excitement. I was dreading that conversation.
I jumped down from the table and went to the corner of the room to put my clothes back on. We got the appointment set up for a month from now then headed out to the car. When I got in the car I turned my phone off. I didn’t want to be bothered right now, I wanted to ride around for a little while and think about what I was going to tell Mace.
I pulled into the drive way and saw that the garage door was open and Mace’s truck was parked. Uh-oh.
I turned around a looked at Liam, “When we go in don’t tell daddy, okay?”
He nodded his head but asked, “Why not?”
“Because I need to tell him. Once
I tell him you can talk to him about it,” I told him and hoped that he could talk to his daddy about it.
“Okay mom.”
I stepped out of the car and bent to get Liam out. Mace flew out of the house with a wild look in his eyes and I knew this conversation was not going to go well.
“House. Now,” he ground out through his clenched teeth.
I took Liam’s hand and squirted around Mace to walk in the house. I could hear Mace’s foot steps behind me so I knew he was hot on my trail. When we got inside I set my purse down on the table beside the door and told Liam to go in his room. He scrambled down the hallway and a second later I heard his TV come on.
I walked in the kitchen so we were farther away from Liam and then spun to face Mace. I opened my mouth to speak but he beat me to it.
“Where have you been?” He seethed.
I was taken aback by the tone in his voice. He didn’t know I was pregnant so why was he so upset?
“I’ve been out. I had my appointment today then I rode around for a little bit after,” I told him while I nervously played with my hands. I didn’t want to look him in the eye for fear of him knowing what the doctor told me.
“Why in the fuck did you turn your phone off?” he fumed. The vein in his neck was bulging with his anger and I knew I fucked up.
We had had this conversation before. I knew to leave my phone on so he could get a hold of me when needed. With Luke being in jail I didn’t even think about it. I thought it would be okay to turn it off. I guess I was wrong.
“I’m sorry, I thought it would be okay to turn it off since Luke was in jail,” I told him meekly.
“Why did you turn it off Araylia?” He bent closer to me so his face was in mine. The repeated question was asking through his teeth and it scared me.
“Because I’ve had a lot to think about. I needed to do that in peace. Without interruptions.”
“You had to think?” He roared and I flinched away from him. “What caused you to need to think without distractions? There is somebody out there terrorizing us and you had to think? You didn’t even think about-”
“I’m pregnant!” I screamed at the top of my lungs. It was his turn to flinch back. “Exactly! So excuse me if I needed to think. I had a lot on my mind as it was then I find out I’m pregnant. That was just the icing on the cake.”
“I…yo…you’re pregnant?” He tripped over his words, but hey at least he got them out.
“Yes. Six weeks. I have pictures if you would like to see?” I was hopeful he would, but I was expecting him to turn it down.
He stared through me for several minutes. He didn’t move a muscle, didn’t say anything. He was a statue.
“Mace?” I called to him after a few minutes of silence.
His eyes snapped to mine and they filled with ice. His body went rigid and I frowned in confusion.
“Get. Out,” he told me.
“What?” I breathed.
“I said get out! I don’t want you in my house right now. Get out,” he repeated his self.
He was kicking me out?
Fuck it, if this was the way he felt then fuck him. I wasn’t going to be able to change his mind. I held my head high and walked out of the room and down the hall. I walked into Liam’s room and saw he was happily playing with his toys, oblivious to what had happened between Mace and me.
“Come on baby, we’re going to stay at Nanny’s for the night.”
He opened his mouth but quickly shut it when he registered that I had said Nanny’s. He got a couple of toys and slipped them into his backpack. We moved to the front door and Liam told me to hang on. He ran away from me in the direction of the kitchen and I heard him tell his daddy goodbye. I dropped my head and drew in a deep breath. I needed strength to get through this. Even though I was acting tough on the outside, my heart was breaking on the inside.
Liam came flying back to my side with a bright happy smile on his face and grabbed my hand. I lead him outside then buckled him up after he jumped in the car. I buckled myself in and put the key in the ignition. When I put my hands on the steering wheel I noticed they were shaking. My nerves were torn up because of the fight and the reaction Mace had. I couldn’t wait to get to Nanny’s so I could cry on her shoulder and get some advice. She was a very wise woman and I trusted everything she told me.
We had been driving for about ten minutes when I heard a hissing noise and then the ride started getting bumpy. One of my tires had to be flat. Fuck! Just what I need right now! I pulled over on the side of the road and prayed I still had the spare tire in the trunk. I put the car in park then stepped out. My back driver’s side tire was flat.
I popped the trunk and almost squealed with delight because the tire was sitting there. My delight was short lived when I was working on changing the tire and then felt cold metal hit my temple.
“Get up bitch. Get that bastard of yours out of the car and walk with me,” I heard a somewhat familiar voice in my ear.
“Okay,” I said in a shaky voice.
As I was getting Liam out of the car I caught a glimpse of the man with the gun. He had a black ski mask on so the only thing I could see were his eyes. They were also oddly familiar.
“Come on baby, this nice man is going to take us to get help,” I said as I reached for him.
He happily climbed in my arms and as I was coming back up I tried snagging my purse. My phone was in my purse and my phone had GPS on it, so somebody could track me.
I felt the cold metal again this time digging to my ribs.
“Set the purse down,” the man seethed.
I gently set the purse down and the man corralled us into a black van. When we had been riding for about 15 minutes I realized I had left all of my hope back in the car with my purse. Unless I found a way to escape, there was no hope.
Chapter 27
Mace
It was the day after I kicked Araylia out. I was scared shitless when she told me she was pregnant. I had already lost two families, I didn’t want to lose another one. So I kicked her out. I was so fucked up.
I was surprised that nobody had called me. I thought for sure that one of her brother’s would call me and tell me to go to hell. Or somebody would show up on my door step threating to kick my ass. But nobody had called or showed up.
I picked up my phone and thought about calling Matt. I didn’t want to alert him, but I was worried myself. Plus I figured if Araylia wasn’t at her Nanny’s then she would be there. Before I talked myself out of it, I found Matt’s number and hit the dial button.
“Yo,” he answered.
“Matt. Is Araylia at your house?” I got straight to the point. I didn’t want to shoot the shit with him.
“Uh…no man. Should she be?” He asked back in a confused tone.
“We got into a fight last night. I thought she would go to your house,” I told him. I ran a hand through my hair and stood from the couch. I began pacing and I felt dread settle in my stomach, making me want to puke. I did not have a good feeling about this.
“Let me call Nanny then I’ll call you right back,” he said and before I could answer he disconnected.
I continued pacing the living room while I waited to hear back from Matt. The worst of thoughts ran through my head. What if she ran off the road and wrapped her car around a pole. She could easily be in a ditch somewhere and it would be my fault. I caused this. I kicked her out. She was fucking pregnant and I kicked her out. I thought it would be better for both of us if we weren’t together. While I was having all of those thoughts something occurred to me.
I kicked her out and it could have caused me to lose her. Regardless if we are together or not, I have a chance of losing her. It would hurt me far worse if I wasn’t with her and lost her than to be together and lose her. If we were together and I lost her, at least I had my time with her. I had all my memories. It would hurt me to lose her, but it would kill me if I wasn’t with her. Like I told her that night, my heart beats because of her.
My phone ringing drew me out of my thoughts. I sighed in relief when I saw it was Matt.
“Yeah?” I answered frantically. Please, let her be there.
“She’s not there man. What the fuck happened last night?” He was worried and I could hear him breathing heavily.
“She told me she was pregnant. She’s fucking pregnant, with my baby. If something happened to her, I don’t even know what I would do,” I shuddered at the thought.
I moved out of the living room and toward the garage. I got the keys out for the bike since it would get me where I needed to go faster.
“How did you guys get into a fight about her being pregnant? That’s good news right?”
“No, at the time it wasn’t good news to me. I had a wife and daughter at one point in my life. I lost them both to a house fire. I wasn’t ready to have another baby so I kind of kicked her out,” I told him as I hooked up the blue tooth to my helmet.
“You kicked her out? My sister told you she was pregnant and you kicked her out?” He seethed.
“Yes,” I told him. I wasn’t going to lie and make myself sound better. What I did was fucked up.
“What the fuck is wrong with you? I’m sorry to hear about your wife and daughter, but my sister is not somebody you can fuck around with. I thought you were a good man and you were going to do right by her. I guess-”
I cut him off when I came upon Araylia’s car about ten minutes down the road.
“I found her car.”
“Where are you? I’m on my way.” I could hear him shouting at some guys in the background and then I heard silence.
“I’m about ten minutes down from my house. She must have been on her way to you or Nanny’s.”
He told me he would be here as fast as he could and then he got off the phone with me. I figured he was going to call his brothers on the way over here so I didn’t think I would have to call them.
While I was waiting on them to get here I looked inside her car for anything. I tried not to touch anything important so we could try to lift some prints. I saw Araylia’s purse open on the passenger seat. Some of her things were on the seat and in the floorboard, her phone in the mess that was on the floor. I growled because that was the only hope that I had of finding her.
The Lucky Bullet Page 21