by Claire Adams
“Since diapers.” Ryan grinned. “He was a cute, fat baby.” He pointed across the table. I smiled as Luke moved uncomfortably in his chair. He didn't like to be the center of attention.
“He started losing his baby fat in eighth grade.” Ryan shoved a piece of bread into his mouth, still looking at my mother.
“That's about when Em lost hers.” I sunk down in my seat.
“Bet she was just as beautiful then as she is now,” Luke said. He leaned over and kissed my temple out of instinct before looking around the table at everyone. The food arrived just in time to save us from an embarrassing visit to our childhoods. My chicken looked great, and I dug in, not because I was starving but more because my mother hated when people talked with food in their mouths. If I kept my mouth full of food, then I wouldn't have to talk to her as much. She eyed Luke more than once, and when her eyes caught the tip of a tattoo peeking out of the sleeve of his shirt, she visibly cringed a little. We finished a rather uncomfortable dinner and said our goodbyes.
“I wasn't going to tell my mom Luke was my boyfriend,” I snapped at Ryan when we walked out to the truck. Luke was holding my hand as we walked and had released it to open the truck door.
“Why not?” Ryan looked over to where I stood, waiting on Luke.
“Because she’s always weird about guys I date.” I wanted to be honest, but I didn't want to hurt Luke’s feelings either. I knew what he had to offer me, but I also knew that my mother would never approve of him simply because he didn't make six figures. She never understood why I worked when I didn't have to. There were plenty of men out there to take care of me in her opinion.
While that had been her goal, it had never been mine. I wanted a love like my Granddad and Mimi. I wanted a love that gave me butterflies forever, not just in the beginning. I guess seeing Mom miserable at home while my dad worked all the time had made me hard. She acted like she was happy, but the only time I saw her smile, like really smile, was when she got to get dressed up and go to parties with him. When he left her, she hadn't been prepared to be independent. I wasn't ever going to be that woman; maybe that's why I was so hell bent on taking care of myself. I could admit I had gone a little overboard, but I was going to protect myself so I didn't end up a fifty-year-old woman who had never worked, nor taken care of herself.
“Well, she should be weird about the men in your life, she’s your mom.” I looked away and found Luke waiting on me to climb in the truck. He smiled and said softly. “There will never be a man good enough for you in your mother's eyes.” He kissed me and climbed in behind me. I snuggled against him as we headed back to the RV and my truck. It was hard not to get caught up in the future and what might come our way. I was trying my best to just live in the moment.
Chapter Twenty-Three
Luke
Emerson left to go to her grandparents after dinner. As much as I wanted her, I didn't want to rush it. Things had just begun, and I wanted them to continue. We headed home early in the morning, and after a quick run, we started working around the property.
“I like the way she looks on you,” Ryan smirked as we loaded two end tables into the back of the truck.
I smiled. “It feels really good,” I admitted. I had thought I’d known what it felt like to be serious about someone, but after my last relationship, I’d closed off my heart; I just hadn’t realized it. Emmy had a way of making me feel again, and I wasn't disappointed.
“I just like that you aren't a grumpy ass all the time,” Ryan said.
“I wasn't that bad.”
Ryan laughed in my face and shook his head. “Bad is an understatement. But seriously, it's good to see you like this. I can only imagine what you are thinking about when you get all doe-eyed and smiley like a chick, but it’s good anyway.” He walked around the truck and sat on the tailgate.
“So what was the deal with Chris?”
I knew this line of question had been coming. He had walked away with Emerson and hadn't heard the rest of what was said.
“Pretty much what you already know. He said he has been with her and couldn't wait until the next time. And he said it in the most disrespectful way; that’s what lit me up more than anything.”
“I see.” He looked up at me. “Did you believe him?”
“She said she’s never been with him, and that’s good enough for me.”
“I wouldn't worry too much about him. If he had ever dated her, I think she would have been a little friendlier with him.”
“I know.” I shrugged. I didn't want to spend my afternoon thinking about Chris, and Ryan picked up on it.
“When’s she due home?” Ryan asked.
“In a few hours.”
“I'll text her and see if she wants to cook out.” I watched him type away on his phone and then smile when he got a reply. He typed again and then laughed.
“What’s so funny?” I asked.
“She likes my steaks better than your chicken.”
“I cooked them both.” I pointed out before reaching over his shoulder and grabbed the phone from his hands, reading the conversation. Then, I typed my own message.
I cooked all the food
Luke, btw
Well I like steak better than chicken, and I don't have to diet like you do.
E
I’ve got something better for tonight
Luke
I bet you do. ;)
E
I handed the phone back to Ryan and headed to the house. I grabbed my keys off the counter and walked back out, climbing into the truck.
“You coming?” I asked Ryan who was still seated on the tailgate.
“Yeah.” He shut the tailgate and then hopped in the passenger door. I waited until he clipped his seatbelt and then took off down the driveway.
***
“Can we get these?” Ryan asked as he dropped cookies in the cart I was pushing.
“You’re an adult with your own money. I’m not buying you cookies.” I picked up some shrimp and pineapple then a gallon of milk and ingredients to make slaw then pushed the cart toward the checkout.
“Minimalist much?” Ryan complained as I pushed past the snack foods. He dropped a bunch of junk in the cart and ignored me when I told him he didn’t need it. It was a battle not worth fighting. The only time he ate healthy was when I cooked.
He ate half a box of cookies between the grocery store and home. It was depressing and infuriating.
When we got back, I set about prepping dinner and making slaw. I set it to the side and went about putting the kabobs together. I was adding the pineapple, and Ryan laughed.
“Who the hell puts fruit on a grill?” He picked a piece up from the plate and popped it in his mouth. I watched him closely. They had been rolled in a hot pepper paste, and he didn’t know it.
“HOLY SHIT!” Ryan yelled and spit the pineapple in his hand. “What the hell?” He looked over his shoulder as he ran water from the sink into his mouth. He swished the water, then spit it in the sink. “Are you trying to kill me?” He complained then walked across the kitchen and opened the fridge pulling out the milk and drinking directly from the container.
“Dude,” I complained as he downed what was left of the milk. “Use a glass. Savage.”
“There wasn't that much left. Why the hell is that pineapple so hot?”
“It's a spin on Bang Bang shrimp. I make it all the time.” I smiled at him. It really wasn't that hot, but it was spicy. “Maybe if you kept your fingers to yourself, you wouldn't have fire mouth right now.”
“Yeah, yeah, the grill is ready, by the way.”
I gathered the food and took it out to the back porch and started the kabobs. They were nearly done when I felt hands travel around my middle while I was facing the grill.
“Hey, handsome.”
I turned and looked down at my girl. I smiled at the thought of calling her mine.
“Hey, beautiful.” I kissed her softly. “I kinda missed you.”
“I just saw you yester
day.”
“Yeah, but you’re usually on your porch when I come home from my run, and you didn’t scream at me at two in the morning.” I smiled and leaned in, kissing her again.
“Well, you are a little annoying.” She smiled.
“Maybe if you slept in the same bed, you would both stay there longer,” Ryan piped in from his seat. “Heyyyyyy, Emmy.” He smiled.
“Hey, Ryan.” She leaned her head back and smiled at him. “I’m going to go grab my stuff. I just wanted to say hi. It smells amazing.” I watched her walk away. She high-fived Ryan as she passed by him.
“You are one lucky mother fucker, and you're welcome,” Ryan said softly. He didn't look at me; he was still looking toward Emmy. “Be glad I love ya, brother. That girl is a keeper.”
“Thanks.” I smirked. “Really, thank you.”
He grunted back, and I laughed. “It's a good thing I don't mind being a third wheel.” He stretched his arms over his head then stood, walking over to me. I handed him the plate of cooked kabobs, and he turned, walking into the house. I turned the grill off and followed him. He was already covering his plate with slaw and reached over and grabbed a couple of the kabobs.
“Is smells wonderful in here,” Emerson said as she came from the front door.
“Don't let it fool you.” Ryan sat down at the table.
She took the plate I handed her, and I watched her eat and smiled to myself every time she rolled her eyes back enjoying the shrimp.
“God this is so good!” Her bright smile made my lips pull up at the edges.
“He’s a pretty good cook. It's why I've been his friend forever. Wait till you taste his gravy. You could cover a flip flop with it, and it would be delicious,” Ryan deadpanned. We all broke out in giggles.
She pushed away from the table and went about cleaning up the kitchen.
“I can get that,” I told her.
“You cook, I clean. It was the way Rachel and I always did it.” She dipped the empty slaw bowl under the stream of water and then added a little soap.
“There's a dishwasher.” I pointed behind her.
She shook her head and continued to hand wash the few dishes that were around the sink. “I can wash them as fast as I can load them.” She smiled over her shoulder and lifted the water nozzle discreetly and sprayed Ryan as he walked by to grab a beer from the fridge.
“That was totally uncalled for.” Ryan stood with the water dripping off his face.
“That was payback for tickling me.”
“Are we even now?” he asked.
“Yes.”
“Don't do it,” I said as Ryan walked up behind her shaking his beer. When he popped the top, the cold liquid spewed over the back of her neck and shoulders. She shrieked and ran toward the door laughing.
I stood, hip against the counter, as I watched him chase her out onto the porch shaking beer in her direction. The friendship they shared was special, and I knew it was because Ryan liked her. Not in a sexual way but just liked her for who she was. It was definitely not something he did often.
I handed her a towel when she walked back in the kitchen grinning from ear to ear. I pulled her to me. Our eyes met, and her smile widened. I covered her lips with mine, and she wrapped her arms around my neck. The kiss was deeper than I had intended, but with her, it was an all-in, all the time kind of thing. When I pulled away, we were both breathing a little heavier. I kissed her nose and looked up to see Ryan watching us. He saluted me then turned and walked toward the back porch.
Chapter Twenty-Four
Emerson
“When did Ryan leave?” I asked Luke as we sat in one of his chairs in the backyard.
“Not too long ago. I think it may have been when the kissing started.” He kissed the side of my head and pulled me a little tighter against his chest. “He may be a little jealous.”
I felt his smile against the side of my head. “I’ll give him hell for not saying bye later.”
“When do you have to go back to Portland?” His rich timber filled the quiet.
“Wednesday, so I'll probably leave here Tuesday night so I don't have to drive super early.”
“And you'll be gone until?”
“I should be back Friday night, maybe Saturday morning. Just depends on if I get everything done. I have to gather some root ball samples to send to the lab before I leave, so I’ll probably be in the woods most of tomorrow and Tuesday.”
I didn't want to do anything but be in his arms. Rachel had disappeared when she first started dating Charlie, and I had sworn I wouldn't be that girl, but here I sat wanting to blow off all of my responsibilities just to be with him. I didn’t even want to go next door, but I knew if I didn’t, one thing would lead to another, and we weren’t ready for that just yet. At least, I wasn’t.
“Tonight was great, this is great.” I stood, bending at the waist and kissed his beard and then his cheek, then his mouth. I ran a finger over his forehead pushing his hair behind his ear. “Thank you.” I kissed him again and then pulled away.
“Let me walk you home.” He stood and followed me to the porch. When I reached the steps, I turned back to him. The light from the porch lamp illuminated his smile. I reached up and fingered his beard, and pulled his face down to mine. His lips pressed a soft kiss over mine that quickly turned into more passion than I had ever felt. The burning in my gut told me I should hold on very tightly to him. My body was on alert and sometimes wanted to go further, but he always slowed it down. I wanted to experience it all with him, but I also didn't want to rush this.
“I'll see you tomorrow.” He brushed his lips softly over mine again and then turned and walked back to his door. Stopping, he looked over at me.
“Goodnight,” he said then pulled at his door handle and waited for me to go inside.
“Night.” I turned and walked inside my house.
I laid in bed that night thinking about how close yet how far away he was.
***
I shuffled through papers, thinking about how just the night before I’d had to force myself to send Luke home for the second night in a row, especially knowing I wouldn’t see him for a few days. I imagined that would only get harder to do—make him... let him leave.
“I didn't know you were going to be here this week,” Chris said as he walked into Granddad’s office, distracting me from my thoughts.
“Just for a couple of days.” I turned back to my papers and continued filing them. He sat down in front of me. I glanced up and found him looking at me.
“What? Did you need something?” My tone was friendly, but distracted.
“I didn't know you knew Ryan and Luke.”
“Yeah. I have for a while.”
“It was just weird seeing you there. As long as I have competed, you've never even asked about it.”
“I actually didn’t even know that’s what you competed in. When they asked me to come, I did.” I shrugged.
“So, you and Luke?” He was fishing.
“Yeah, me and Luke.” I smiled and continued to work on getting the paperwork straight. With Granddad being out so many days, it was piled up. More reason I was glad Chris was taking on more work and making sure things were right when I wasn't there.
“Hey, I'm gonna grab a late lunch, you want to join?”
“Sure, give me just a minute to wrap this up,” I responded as I finished the last of the first pile of paperwork.
I followed Chris out of the building and across the street to the Coffee Bean. I ordered, paid, and then looked around for a table while he did the same. He waited for our orders and then brought it over.
We chatted about work for the most part and everything that was coming up. The more we discussed upcoming projects, the more I wasn't sure what I would do without him in the office at this point. The back and forth between the company and my grant would be draining otherwise.
“Once we complete the Chadwick project, we can put the extra crew over in Salston to finish up there.
We should be caught up enough to start the next three by then,” Chris was explaining.
“Sounds good. Thank you for all your help. I can't begin to tell you how grateful I am that you are here.”
“Whatever I can do to help, I'm here. Your family has always been good to me, so I'm just repaying the favor.” He took my hand in his and smiled. His thumb ran over my knuckles gently as he looked up at me. It made me a little uneasy, but he didn’t seem to mean anything by it, so I tried to ignore it.
“Your mom and I have talked quite a bit lately when she was at the office. Maybe we should all grab dinner before you head back tomorrow.”
“I don't think so. I have a lot of work to get done before I leave.” I didn't want to have dinner with my mother again so soon. “Plus, I need to get back before dark to collect a few more sampled for the grant, so I’ll probably head out around four.” I pulled my hand back across the table and placed it in my lap.
“Maybe next time.” He smiled and lifted his sandwich to his mouth. My thoughts went to Luke, and it hit me that he probably wouldn’t be keen on the idea of me having dinner with Chris in any capacity—innocent or otherwise. Lunch with a co-worker was one thing. Dinner was another.
***
I finished the last stack of folders on the desk and gathered my things before heading for my truck. I walked quickly, not used to leaving alone after dark, and climbed in. The drive to Granddad’s and Mimi’s was only about ten minutes, so I called Luke for a quick chat. He didn't answer, so I left him a message.
Hey, I was just driving home and hadn't talked to you all day. I guess you are in the shop. Call me when you get a chance.
I hit the end button, and it rang almost immediately, so I hit the answer button on the steering wheel without looking at the number, thinking he was calling me back.
“Hello.”
“Emerson.” My mother's voice poured through the truck.
“Hi, Mom.” I said and groaned inwardly.
“How was your day?” she asked.
“It was good. I got caught up on a pile of paperwork.”