Chapter 37
Sallie got off the train to heavy grey clouds swirling angrily above her head, patches of ice from the night before hadn’t yet defrosted and dirty slushy snow lodged in the gutters. What a day to arrive back - the weather was looking grim.
As she hurried along dragging her case behind her she wasn’t sure that going straight to the hospital was such a good idea. She felt exhausted by the journey which amplified the worry she had for Nina. They were so close - Nina was more like a sister to her and her going into hospital wasn't in the plan anywhere, at any point. Sallie felt like a cloud of worry was hovering over her head as she walked through Newport Reef station. The idea of walking into the hospital and seeing Nina in a bed surrounded by machines suddenly seemed all too much.
She gripped the handle on her case harder, the whites of her knuckles showing through her skin, and wondered whether she should have gone home first, had a night in her own bed. Made sure her head was straight.
Opening the map on her phone it told her that Newport Reef hospital was a ten-minute walk and even in the weather she was grateful for the cold fresh air after the hours in the plane, airports and train.
Hurrying along up the hill, and too late to hop in a taxi, the heavens opened with sheets of rain. Ducking into a shop doorway, Sallie fished around in her bag for her umbrella, opened it up and carried along up the hill with cars whooshing past showering the pavement with more water. By the time she arrived at the hospital she felt harassed, damp, tired and irritable.
Hospital noises were around her at every turn - an ambulance screamed past with its siren blaring and a parking attendant in a fluoro vest was shouting as he was directing traffic. A reversing catering van’s beeps sounded loudly for all pedestrians to stop and get out of the way - she waited for it to finish the manoeuvre and walked into the hospital and approached the large circular desk of the newly renovated hospital. It crossed her mind that the inside of the hospital looked as if it had been designed by the same architect from the airport she’d just left.
As she approached the desk she was greeted by a middle-aged woman with long, thick dark hair, a tight uniform jumper and baggy wide-legged trousers.
‘Yes?’ The woman said, her face not looking either particularly welcoming nor happy.
Sallie was taken aback - it was a far cry from the customer service she’d experienced all the way across the Atlantic and it crossed her mind to take the name from her badge and complain.
‘ICU please,’ she said politely and smiled.
‘What? ICU?’ The woman in the ghastly, overly tight jumper barked.
‘Yes, I’d like directions please.’
‘We don’t just let anyone in there you know.’
‘Yes, thank you I am aware of that. I’ve had an email from the ward. I’m the legal guardian of the child of one of the patients.’
She tapped on the computer. ‘Name?’
‘Excuse me?’
‘Your name?’
‘Ms Broadchurch-Chalmers, thank you.’
‘Mrs of Miss?’
‘As I said, it’s Ms.’
Sallie didn’t elaborate further - this woman and her attitude were clearly in the wrong job. The woman continued to tap on the computer while Sallie straightened herself and took her phone out of her bag.
‘Straight down to the lifts. Third floor. You’re expected.’ And the woman dismissed Sallie with a curt nod.
‘Where I come from, it’s considerate to say please and thank you, even if you can’t manage a smile. Might be a good idea for you to take that on board in, you know, your line of work.’ Sallie smiled broadly as she pulled the handle of her suitcase up and went over towards the lifts.
The woman’s large angular chin dropped and as Sallie stalked off, head held high she thought she heard the woman mumbling about not liking the use of the title Ms.
Nurses on their way home after a shift, an old man pushing an extremely large woman in a wheelchair and a young dad gripping the hand of a toddler holding a new baby balloon stood in line with her for the lift. They walked in and it sped up super quickly and stopped at ICU.
Sallie stepped nervously out of the lift into a long corridor, went through a set of automatic doors and into another eerily quiet, low lit corridor which made her careful where she stepped. Approaching a second set of doors a sign instructed her to wave a hand over a screen and wait for assistance. Two minutes later, and the door opened outwards and a young male staff member dressed in a shirt emblazoned with the hospital name greeted her with a smile.
‘Hello. What can I do for you?’ He spoke quietly, with kind eyes and a lovely aura.
‘I’m a visitor. I’m here to see Nina. I did email in but I’ve only just arrived from the airport so not sure whether or not it’s still going to be okay.’
‘Not a problem. Name please? I’ll just go and check on the system and ascertain where we are at with the doctor and visitors and let you know what’s what.’
Relieved at his calm demeanour and polite friendly face compared to the hideous woman in the foyer who had done nothing to allay any of her fears, Sallie felt everything drop - her shoulders relaxed and she unclenched her hand from her case, resting the tote bag on top of it and taking her scarf and coat off. The warmth of the hospital compared to the cold outside made her cheeks burn and her cashmere jumper had started to stick to the little rolls of skin over her jeans at her sides.
The young nurse came back a few minutes later and led her into the dimmed lights of the reception area of the unit. A faux wood reception desk covered in notices, folders and screens greeted her, with two staff sat staring intently at their computers. Her suitcase rolling along behind her and her shoes clipping on the tiled floor sounded extremely loud against the low hum and monotonous beeps of machines echoing from every room.
Sallie’s gaze slowly took in the dimly-it area as the nurse started to log her details into the computer and instructed her what to do with her stuff and where to go. A small waiting area adjacent to the lifts had a flat-screen TV on the wall playing the news, each of the small, uncomfortable-looking chairs was empty and a pile of magazines on a tiny side table looked like it hadn’t been touched for years. Sallie shuddered at both the memories of being in hospital and what was happening to Nina.
She followed the nurse quietly until they found Nina’s room at the very end of the corridor. Antiseptic mixed with food smells hit her nostrils whilst she washed her hands with pink, medicinal soap and pulled paper towels to dry her hands from a dispenser on the wall.
‘Okay, we can go in,’ the nurse said, gently opening the door.
Nina was surrounded by equipment in the dimly lit room, cannulas in each arm, propped up on pillows and covered in taut, white cellular blankets. An oxygen mask hung nearby and a myriad of machines displayed various coloured numbers, lights and information. A lone, rectangular-shaped water jug sat on the table beside the bed and a murky green coloured plastic chair was pushed back by the window.
Sallie slipped in quietly behind the nurse. The nurse gestured her to the chair and she sat down and placed her hands tightly together in her lap. Shocked, she could barely speak seeing Nina like this - she looked much worse than she had anticipated, so small, yet at the same time almost bloated and helpless in the bed surrounded by all the equipment.
Nina, sensing something in the room flicked her eyes open momentarily and as recognition flashed across her face, took a deep breath as if even the thought of smiling or speaking was too much of an effort.
‘Sals.’ She whispered.
‘I’m here sweetheart.’
‘Look after Tillie for me,’ Nina said, her breath laboured as she spoke and as she finished, pleased with herself at getting the words out, the tiniest of smiles curled up from the sides of her mouth. Her whole body seemed to ever-so-slightly relax, her head dropped to the side and her eyes closed tightly.
Sallie looked at the nurse, not trusting herself to speak in case she burs
t into tears.
‘She’s been exhausted - that’s the most I’ve seen her interact since I’ve been with her in here,’ he said, putting his hand gently on Sallie’s shoulder, and standing there beside her looking at Nina in the bed.
Sallie nodded quietly and just sat there staring at Nina, helpless in the bed surrounded by white and beeping sounds and tiny little flashes of green, orange and white.
The nurse whispered, ‘I’ll leave you here for a few minutes.’
Sitting bolt upright in the disinfected plastic chair Sallie looked back at Nina. The atmosphere was sterile, grim and she could almost hear her own heart beating in her chest along with the beeps of the machines all around them.
As she sat there, dead still, she had a foreboding feeling that this wasn’t going to be something that was going to get better very fast.
***
It hadn’t taken much for Sallie to leave the room - the nurse had come back shortly afterwards to say that visiting hours were nearly over, moving around the bed efficiently without making a sound or disturbing Nina and smiling at Sallie, whispering that it was time for her to go.
Sallie walked out of the hospital as more freezing rain lashed down onto the pavements and cold air bit through her coat. When a gust of wind nearly blew her over, she stood still and held her face up to the rain letting its iciness wash down her face. She tried to focus on the positives - the fact that Nina was being cared for brilliantly, the fact that she’d got back quickly without too many delays and the fact that Nina had not only recognised her but spoken to her too - but seeing her in the blue hospital gown surrounded by the white metal bed and hundreds of screens Sallie felt pessimistic at best.
She moved back under cover of the ambulance bay roof and got out her phone checking the transport times. She would be able to make the last ferry if she walked quickly down the hill, there were a couple of taxis down in the town and then just as she was about to shut her phone up she saw that there was a bus to Pretty Beach in thirteen minutes. She decided to walk back into the hospital, get a hot drink and take the bus home.
On the road home to Pretty Beach Sallie sat at the top of the bus at the front, staring out the window as the bus driver took the twists and turns of the coast road with ease. A couple of teenagers sat right at the back giggling quietly and an older couple who had clearly been out for a few drinks were chatting about their upcoming holiday. Sallie felt strangely detached from the world, from the ride on top of the bus, from what was going on in the hospital and from the fact that she had just flown across the Atlantic in the First Class cabin of a very big aircraft. It was almost as if she was looking down at a petite, blonde, woman sitting on the top of a bus going around the bends of a road by the sea.
‘Love, love, you need to get off, this one terminates here!’ The bus driver called up the stairs and Sallie jumped back to life. Had she fallen asleep sitting up? Disorientated she gathered her bag, scarf and little suitcase and clambered down the tight stairs of the bus.
Just as she was stepping off the bottom of the stairs she stumbled on the wheel of the case and hit the floor of the bus, her hands taking her weight as she fell down. The bus driver quickly scrambled out of the cab and started to help her up.
‘Lord! That was a tumble! Are you okay?’ He asked, grabbing her elbow and helping her up.
‘Oh yes, yes, sorry,’ Sallie replied as she smoothed down her jumper and looked at her thumb which felt like it had been pulled out of its socket. ‘I’ve had a very long day including a flight from America. I need to get home.’
‘Not a nice night for it, love. You got someone who can pick you up from here then?’
‘Oh no, it’s fine thank you. I live just down there, along the laneway. All good.’
‘Ahh well, lucky duck you are then, living down there near the sea - best you get yourself home and in the warm. Forecast is saying the possibility of another storm coming Pretty Beach’s way in the next few days - touch and go whether it’s going to be tonight.’
Chapter 38
Sallie gritted her teeth as she keyed in the number to the keypad on the barn door of the Boat House. Cold, tired and now shivering as the icy rain soaked through her jeans, she needed her own bed, a hot shower and a sit down on her own sofa, in her own sitting room sounded like bliss. The smell of the hospital, the aeroplane, the bus and the various meals she’d had on the run seemed to be all around her - in her hair, in her clothes and on her hands.
She started unwinding the scarf from her neck, pulled off her coat and had removed her blazer all by the time she’d reached the top of the stairs and stepped into the apartment. The wind whistled in under the French doors from the deck and driving rain hit the window panes. She shivered, pressed the app on her phone to turn on more lights and walked over to the pot belly stove and opened it up. It was already laid and waiting to be lit. Silently saying a thank you for the organisation that was Ben, a few minutes later she shut the doors on roaring fires in both the sitting room and her bedroom and wistfully wished that Ben was back too.
She stood and looked around at the apartment - she’d forgotten how beautiful it was, forgotten just how lucky she was to have this new life by the sea. Leaning on the old windowsill by the wood burner, looking down past the two linen sofas out the doors, Sallie gazed out the back to the boats bobbing around out on the water. One of the seaplanes glinted in the moonlight and the beam from the lighthouse flashed in the distance. She pulled up one of the sash windows an inch, the sea air blowing in, the sound of the jetty creaking with the rise and fall of the waves and the boats tugging against their moorings.
She took a stack of thick white towels into the bathroom, pulled back the white crochet vintage-style shower curtain from the bath and sighed as a gush of hot water sprang from the old-fashioned copper rain shower above.
She stood there washing the grime and smells of the past twenty-four hours away and felt the warmth slowly return to every part of her body as the bathroom filled with steam. She poured black pepper body wash onto a cloth and scrubbed every part of her body, as bubbles slid away down the plug.
Pressing the large copper handle towards the wall, the pipes gave their familiar creak and groan as she climbed out of the shower, wrapped herself in a towel and tied a turban onto her wet hair. Her phone started ringing, she propped it in between her ear and her shoulder and started rubbing moisturiser into her face.
‘Hi, you’re back - what a welcome home eh,’ Holly said.
‘I can’t believe it, Holly. I’ve just been up there, she looks terrible. It was all so surreal.’
‘It’s awful - Rory’s home now, his rotation at St. Louise’s is done so at least he’s here, we, I mean you, or whoever, can chat to him too...’ she trailed off. ‘He’s very good - it’ll be better to have someone in the know around.’
‘Ahh, that’s good. I suppose there’s not a whole lot anyone can do though, is there?’
‘Not really. As much as I’ve told Rory it seems it’s all a bit of an unknown equation.’
Sallie took a deep breath in and sighed. ‘It seemed as much with the little I was told at the hospital - they didn’t really seem to be able to tell me much at all and obviously, at this point, I wasn’t going to ask too many questions.’
‘The worry is the baby though,’ Holly said, sighing down the other end of the phone.
‘I know - at least I’m back now and at least we have Lilly. My God she deserves a medal - she’s been amazing - so young too, but she seems to have a wise old head on her shoulders that one.’
‘Yes, I’ve heard - Pete has been brilliant too. He said that Lilly has just got on without any fuss and that is exactly what you need in a situation like this.’ Holly replied.
‘Indeed - it could have gone very differently with the childcare aspect. After all the reservations I had about Pete too - I feel a bit bad about that now.’
‘So, what are you going to do? Have Tillie at yours, or stay there until Nina’s back ho
me?’ Holly asked as Sallie propped the phone up, put it on speaker, unravelled the towel from her head and started to comb her hair.
‘I don’t know - to be quite honest Holly I’ve not really thought about it too much. I spent the flight home making sure everything is ready for the Orangery competition to leave me relatively free to work around Lilly’s schedule and her hours. I should be able to look after Ottilie and get the last few bits done for the Orangery in between. Pete’s going to help out too.’
‘Sounds very busy - and in this weather too! Apparently, another storm’s on the way, not as bad as the last one, but you never know - you’ve a lot on your plate Sallie. Let me know what I can do.’
‘Will do. Look I need to go, sorry, I want to speak to Ben before I collapse and fall asleep,’ Sallie said, finishing the call and promising Holly she would pop into the bakery the next day.
Later, after speaking to Ben, making herself something to eat and sitting down in front of the fire in her pyjamas she sighed to herself and spoke out loud.
‘What a day.’
Chapter 39
Pete Mulhoney always seemed large and loud, but in the sitting room of Nina’s cottage bouncing Tillie on his lap, he seemed even bigger, even louder than he usually did. Sallie looked past him out to the huge puddles on the terrace and lashing sleet hitting the windows.
‘Well, one thing’s for certain, I won’t be taking her out for a walk in this.’ Sallie said, indicating the weather.
‘There’s a rain cover for the pram - I saw it in the back of the car when I was putting it in the garage the other day.’ Pete replied.
Winter at Pretty Beach Page 13