by Ford, Linda;
“I haven’t told the children yet. I suppose I should.” He pushed to his feet. “Do you want to come with me?”
“Yes… but I can’t. I have to feed the horses and see they have water.” And spend some time working with them. She’d neglected them the last few days.
“Of course. Come and see me when you get back to town, and I’ll tell you how it went.” He stuffed the letter back inside his vest and strode away.
She remained where she was, soaking up the view and remembering all the other views she and Levi had enjoyed. A sense of peace and rightness filled her. But she couldn’t sit there all day dreaming. The animals did need attention. She pushed to her feet, dusted her backside, and headed for the pasture.
Something on the ground next to where Levi had tied Billy Bob caught her attention. A piece of paper. He must have dropped the letter when he tried to put it in his pocket.
She scooped up the paper. It was the wrong shape and size to be the letter. Curious, she unfolded it. It took her several seconds to believe she held a wanted poster. Even then she couldn’t believe the identity of the man on the poster.
Her heart stopped beating. Her lungs stopped working. Seems her ears must have stopped working, too, because a vast silence surrounded her, and then everything started up with a bang. She gasped as her heart kicked against her ribs and her ears roared.
“It can’t be,” she whispered. But there was no mistaking the likeness, even though it was only a drawing. It was Levi. The Rawhide Kid. Reward of $500. Toby had been right in his first observation.
She stared at the poster a long time, her thoughts scrambling in a thousand different directions.
He was living a lie.
But he was a good man.
The reward money would buy her land.
Who would do the good things he did if she turned him in for the money? Who would be her friend?
What was she going to do?
Finally, she folded the poster and carefully slid it into her pocket. Levi had obviously changed his mind and left his life of crime. Didn’t everyone deserve a chance to start over? If he could do it, so could she.
After taking care of the horses, she returned to town, went immediately to the store, and placed a mail order for a dress. The storekeeper promised he wouldn’t tell anyone.
Only then did she go to find Levi.
Levi waited for the grandparents in front of the store. They would arrive by private buggy, hired out of Sandpoint. Being reunited with the grandparents was best for the kids. Yet he hoped the grandparents weren’t like the ones he’d had to live with.
He often wondered how his fun-loving, happy ma could have been the product of that home. It had been all about rules governing every minute of the day. As if making any sort of decision was a sin.
Small wonder Matt had rebelled. Trouble was, Matt’s rebellion had gone too far. He could have left home and sought his own path without crossing into lawlessness. Levi sighed. Anger had driven Matt to make foolish choices.
A buggy approached, and Levi snatched his hat from his head. He squinted, trying to see the couple, gauge what sort they were. But dust billowed up as the buggy slowed, obscuring any sight of the occupants. He stepped back and waited for the dust to settle and glanced back to the figure watching out the window.
He’d asked Glory to join him, but she’d laughed and refused. She’d said, “I might ruin your good impression on them,” then glanced down at her britches. “After all, they’ll be measuring you up as surely as you’re measuring them.” So instead of being by his side, she watched from the protection of the store. He’d wanted to say she would pass inspection just as she was, but she hadn’t given him the chance.
He smiled at her now, hoping she would read in his look his acceptance. He didn’t know when he’d decided he didn’t have any intention of trying to reform her. She was fine just the way she was… britches and all.
By the time he turned back to the buggy, a stately looking gentleman assisted a black-clad woman from the back. He strode forward and introduced himself.
It was much later, after supper taken at the stopping house, before he got a chance to speak to Glory alone.
“They seem nice enough, don’t you agree?” They had left the grandparents to put the children to bed and spend the night with them. Levi would sleep under the stars. Not something he minded at all.
They had walked to a place overlooking the river and found a spot to sit and watch the sun set.
Glory didn’t answer for a moment, as if considering her words. “I guess we have to trust what they are when they’re here is what they are when they aren’t here.”
He chuckled. “And you don’t know if you can trust them or not.”
“Trust is a pretty fragile thing. I don’t give it easily.”
“But when you do?” Did he hope to hear her say she trusted him? Yes, he wanted it, but for all the wrong reasons. Maybe not wrong, but not available for him. He would not forget Matt in prison, not even for the joy of knowing a woman like Glory—spunky, free-thinking, and independent. A rescuer of abused animals… and so much more he couldn’t let himself enumerate because of the way it made him struggle to remember his vow.
“All I can say is there are no second chances.”
She must mean her father. “That’s pretty harsh. What if your pa comes back a reformed man? Wouldn’t you give him another chance?”
“I no longer even think about Pa that way. He’s just a person we’re related to. Nothing more. As such, if he came back half-dead, I’d care for him. Just as I would any sick or injured person or animal.”
“But without forgiving him?”
She didn’t answer, and he supposed that was her answer. Then she spoke, quietly, softly. “I will never say never.”
It was a huge concession on her part. One that made him realize just how much she’d grown in her faith. He reached for her hand. “Perhaps you will get the chance to take never out of your life one of these days.”
She gave him a long, considering look. “Maybe I already have.”
“Really? How? When?”
She shrugged. “Can’t say. Just have.”
He wanted to hug her, dance her across the prairie, but he didn’t have the right, so he squeezed her shoulders with one arm. “You’ve changed, Glory Hamilton.”
“You have no idea how much.”
He ached clear through that he didn’t have the right to ask if her change included trusting him. Instead, he shifted the conversation back to the children. “The children are a little tense around the grandparents, but that would seem normal considering they haven’t seen them in several years and it signals the reality of their father’s death.”
“How long are the grandparents staying?” she asked.
“Mrs. Templeton said she needed a few days to recuperate before she makes the return trip. They said they’d like me to show them around, explain the work I want to do.”
“They’ll be here Sunday then?”
“At least that long.”
“So they’ll hear you preach?”
He wondered why the caution in her voice. “Don’t you think that’s a good thing?” Did she consider him a poor preacher? It wasn’t something they’d ever discussed, and suddenly he longed to know. “You think they’ll be disappointed when they hear me?”
“No, I didn’t mean that. I think you’re a very good preacher. I remember the first Sunday.” She gave a low laugh. “I thought you’d preach fire and brimstone and warn people like me we needed to toe the line.”
His laugh was mocking. “I wanted to. But I couldn’t. Now I know you only want to shock people to keep them at a distance and protect yourself.”
She grew very still. “Is that what I do?”
Had he gone too far? Crossed her solid fence lines?
A deep sigh shuddered from her. “I suppose I do. I just never thought of it. Maybe I can change.”
“How?”
“You
know. Be more ladylike. That sort of thing.” She sounded as if the words burned her tongue.
“Glory, who you are is who you are and is just fine. All you can do is learn to trust others. Or at least God.”
“You think that’s all I need?”
“I know it.”
She sighed, a sound as full of uncertainty as any he’d heard.
By the time Sunday rolled around, Levi had taken the Templetons around the country. They’d discussed the mission he wanted to start. They’d enjoyed several picnics with the children. Levi was convinced they would be good with the children, who were anxious to get to their new home.
Mr. Templeton had promised they’d leave the next day if all went well. “I have some business to attend to before we leave.”
Levi couldn’t help wonder what business he could possibly have, but it wasn’t his place to ask and he didn’t.
Attendance had grown steadily at the Sunday service. From his place before the gathering audience, he looked about, saw the usual townspeople, as well as a number of people passing through, many who had spent the night at the stopping house. Glory and her sisters had not yet appeared.
He picked up his Bible and quickly reviewed his notes.
A sudden rumble of murmurs made him glance up. He saw people looked to the right and followed the direction.
Three women approached. He recognized Mandy and Joanna, but the third was unfamiliar. No. Wait. It was Glory. In a dress. A very pretty dress. She had fashioned her braid around her head in a coronet.
Levi stared.
Glory sent him a defensive, vulnerable look then stared straight ahead.
Glory in a dress. He tried to think if he liked it. He didn’t. Glory belonged in britches. Was there something wrong with him to think so? Shouldn’t he be glad to see her in something more conventional? But he wasn’t. This was not the Glory he knew and loved. Why would she change?
The question badgered the back of his thoughts as she and her sisters found a place to sit, as he led the singing, and even as he delivered his sermon.
He wanted to ask her, but several people spoke to him after the service, and he had to watch Glory and her sisters slip away. As soon as he could get away, he hurried to the stopping house and burst into the kitchen. “Where’s Glory?”
Joanna looked up from doing some mending. “She left. Try her shop.”
He raced to the shop. Pal was gone, but he checked inside anyway just to make sure Glory wasn’t there. She wasn’t. He wanted to ride out and find her, but he’d promised the children to spend the afternoon with them.
And then Mrs. Templeton prepared a nice supper. “If all goes well, this will be our last day here. I hope we can start our return journey tomorrow.”
Levi could not excuse himself without seeming rude. But as soon as he could get away, he ran back to the stopping house, again demanding to see Glory.
Joanna shrugged. “She’s not here.”
“Is she avoiding me?”
“I’m not sure. Maybe she’s avoiding everyone.”
“Why?”
“Why is she avoiding people, or why did she wear a dress?”
“Yes.”
Joanna chuckled. “The first is because of the last. But why she felt the need to don a dress? Well, I expect it has something to do with you.”
“Me?” He backed up two steps as if she’d punched him in the chest.
“You being a preacher and all, I’m guessing she thought she had to be a proper lady before you’d look at her in that… you know… special way. And if you hurt my sister, you’ll be answering to me.”
Levi stumbled from the house. He’d told her he wasn’t free to care. How had his vow turned into such a sacrifice? Was this God testing him?
He’d find her tomorrow and explain his vow. Tell her the whole truth. She’d understand.
Only the next day turned into a blur of activities he couldn’t escape.
Mr. Templeton disappeared right after breakfast, and when Levi tried to slip away, Mrs. Templeton begged him to wait. “He’ll be back soon, then we must be on our way. He’ll want to see you before he leaves.”
Levi expected the man wanted to say a last good-bye, but it was all Levi could do to endure the wait.
Mr. Templeton strode in a short while later, a glow of victory on his face. “I did it, Mother. Just as we planned.”
The pair grinned at each other then faced Levi. Mr. Templeton spoke, but it was obviously for the both of them. “We appreciate how you rescued our grandchildren, and we think you are doing a good work here. So to show our gratitude and help your cause, we bought land you can use to start your mission.”
Levi knew his mouth hung open. He cranked it closed. Forced himself to speak. “You bought land?”
“We studied the options as you showed us around, and did some asking around. There’s one piece of land that seemed superior to all the others. It’s close to town, high enough to not suffer floods, and it’s beautiful. We purchased it and have put your name on the deed.”
Levi’s heart thudded to the soles of his boots and lay there quivering. “What land did you buy?”
“A piece owned by a Mr. Milton.” They handed him a piece of paper he knew was the deed.
The deed to land he had promised Glory he would not buy.
She would never understand.
He must find her and explain before she heard the news from another source. But he could not rush away until he’d helped the Templetons pack up everything, until he’d seen them safely into the hired buggy, until he’d said his final good-bye. His heart felt pulled in two as he kissed the children good-bye. “I’m going to miss you both.”
Emmy hugged him tight. “I wish you could go with us.”
He nodded and hugged Jack, who tried to be brave about this parting, but tears glistened in his eyes as he broke away from Levi’s arms. Levi’s own eyes weren’t without unshed tears. “Keep in touch,” he said to the grandparents, and they promised they would.
He waved to them through blurry vision until the dust obscured them from sight. Then he drew in a deep, steadying breath and turned his heart toward the other half of his pain. He must find Glory.
He’d bought the land. Everyone in town knew it. And everyone seemed to think it was a good idea. Not one person, apart from her sisters, expressed concern about what she’d do with her livestock. They all agreed the work Levi intended to do was so noble it deserved every bit of sacrifice necessary.
She was the only one making any sacrifice. And not willingly. What would they all think if she posted the wanted poster by the door of the general store? They wouldn’t likely be so oh-isn’t-Levi-wonderful then.
The paper practically burned a hole in her britches. She’d kept his secret because she thought he deserved a second chance. Now she knew he was more false than any of them knew.
There was something better than tacking the poster to the wall. She dug out an envelope and paper from the drawer where Joanna kept such things. She wrote a short note, addressed the envelope to the territorial marshal, and put in the wanted poster. Her footsteps driven by anger and a sense of betrayal, she delivered the letter to the ferry man.
She then rode out to her horses and led them from the pasture. For two cents she’d ride five days and disappear into the mountains far to the north.
Just like her pa.
She swallowed a bitter taste. If she left, it would be to run from deceit and lies. Why did Pa run when he had three daughters who had once longed for him to be part of their lives?
No more. No more trusting anything a man said or promised. She should have learned that lesson well enough from her father. Only it appeared she hadn’t, and now she had to learn it over again… thanks to Levi.
Levi. She tried to think his name with the same coolness she thought of Pa, but instead it caught like a burr in her brain and scratched along her thoughts, leaving a trail of scraped flesh. She narrowed her eyes, ground down on her teeth, and
tried to ignore it, but she suspected it would take a long time for the bruises to heal.
She left the gate of her pasture open and headed away from town without a backward look, her horses trailing after her. Properties she’d dismissed as being too far from town now seemed not nearly far enough, and she rode for two hours before she turned off the narrowing trail and ducked through crowded trees with barely enough room for a horse.
Fifteen yards later she broke into a grassy clearing. It didn’t receive as much sunshine as her former pasture and would likely be dampish, but it was the best she could do. She strung rope from tree to tree, creating a temporary enclosure for the horses, then pulled her camping supplies from Pal’s back. She hadn’t come right out and told Joanna she wouldn’t be back but had given enough hints that when she didn’t return Joanna would understand.
Not until she sorted out her feelings, her sense of having been dealt a dirty deal, would she return to town. Treacherous Levi intended to stay in town, but soon the marshal would ride in and take him away. Only then would Glory go back.
She sat staring at the horses munching down grass with little concern for their future. Her heart felt like a giant fist grinding against everything she valued, trusted, or even dreamed of.
Was she as much a traitor as Levi to turn him in?
But he was a criminal with a price on his head. And she needed the money to buy land. Perhaps she could even buy back her land.
If he had known she found the wanted poster, would he have trusted her to keep his secret?
Just like she’d trusted him. And look how that turned out.
She would never trust again.
What about God? Did her decision include God?
The words she’d read so many times in Job, and wondered at how the man could still trust God, crowded her mind. “Though he slay me, yet will I trust in him.” Job was a better person than she. She couldn’t find it in her heart to say, “Okay, it’s fine,” when everything was wrong.
She spent her days working with the horses and sitting next to her campfire, which for the most part remained dead, and staring into space. She was healing, she told herself. Rebuilding the protective barriers around her heart she’d foolishly let crumble under Levi’s influence.