by Rose, Rhea
“The cards will tell you what you need to know,” she said evenly.
I finally gave in. At least I can ask the cards about Sia.
Something about her voice and manner made me relax. I reached for the cards and noticed that the polish on my nails began to sparkle more brightly than usual. My fingers looked lovely. The minute I touched a card, the design on the back of it began again to slowly spin and glow in a magical way. The card felt warm and sent a pleasant vibration up my hand. I closed my eyes a moment to enjoy the feeling. Somewhere far away in the back of my mind I heard Maisie’s voice “Look! Look at it. Turn it! Turn the card.” She demanded.
I did.
Chapter 10
Of Cups
Fortunes Made
Lovers.
The silhouettes of two people holding hands came up, and they moved! They walked slowly along a beach. The background was filled with warm colors and sky, but the two people remained silhouettes. I brought the card closer. Looking at the card was like watching a movie. I wanted to get an idea of how it was doing these great special effects. I felt the breeze blow out at me from inside the card, heard the birds, smelled the ocean and smelled the roses in her arms. I looked to Maisie for an explanation, but she looked frightened.
Maisie stared at something behind me.
I turned, quickly.
Devon, back with his paper bag. He cast a large shadow. He stood in the threshold between the front and back of the shop. He appeared fresh, warm and electric. He wore a fedora, a pair of jeans and a dress shirt. He pulled something out of his pocket “Reach for the sky, baby.” He seemed to be pointing a gun; it didn’t look like a serious gun; a squirt gun to be exact. Devon didn’t hesitate to step right in, kick over the card table and grab the money box he found underneath. I guess Maisie hadn’t fastened the lid because the box fell open. Money spilled out.
I reached out to grab his wrist, instead Devon grabbed mine. He gave me a kind of weird and crazed grin. “Me Tarzan, you Jane,” he said then he kissed me hard and sparks literally flew. His kiss was deliciously disorienting. He copped a feel of my breast. He locked lips with me again, and I was uncontrollably attracted to him.
Devon pushed me away and stuffed the money from the box into his paper bag, closed the lid on the box and grabbed me. He grinned lewdly at me, as if he read my thoughts.
He growled at me and said, “Lingerie.”
Against my will I grappled around for the naughties I’d purchased earlier. When I found them I pulled out the panties and threw them at him, hoping he’d take them and be gone. He winked at me, rammed the panties into his paper bag then grabbed my purse, spilling its contents.
In the distance, outside the shop, I heard sirens, but I assumed it was me hearing the high pitched pulse of blood in my ears. But the sirens grew so loud they snapped me out of my lusty brainwash for Devon, and I grabbed the nearest thing at hand and threw it at the escaping man.
Maisie's box of tarot cards flew toward him like a bullet.
The cards hit him in his perfect little butt.
Devon half turned and he and I and Maisie watched as the box of tarot cards bounced off of Devon’s backside and flew upward. The lid to the box flew sideways releasing the cards from the deck like birds set free. The cards transformed becoming bright, gossamer apparitions in human like forms moving like a Japanese bullet train away from the scattered and fallen cardboard. The specters of the major arcana flew free and became like streaks of lightening; orange, green, yellow. With no warning, as quickly as they flew apart, they came back, shot together for an instant to form a large ball of radiant and shimmering light -- crackled , split, no shattered, and zoomed off in different directions, through the walls, out of the shop and away.
But one of those balls of energy flew at me and hit me like a pillow swung by a sumo wrestler and knocked me on my ass, taking my breath away for a couple of heart beats. Maisie locked eyes with me; it looked like she blamed me for the mess!
I waited for an explanation of what we’d all witnessed, but she didn’t offer one. I wanted desperately to get out of the shop. I groped around for the spilled contents of my purse. She helped me gather my things, and I took them from her, returning each item; lip gloss, nail file, wallet, tissue, gum… all to their appropriate pocket within my Alexander Wang, Jane bag. I don’t normally keep it zipped up and that’s why everything fell out!
Devon left the shop again. It was my turn to help Maisie collect her cards. “Take this,” she said, in an urgent tone. I figured I wasn’t moving fast enough for her. She’d handed me a tarot card, The Star tarot card. I stared at the card for an instant when the next thing I knew an electrical buzz and shock wave went through my fingers and arm. I froze, really froze. I couldn’t move. I wondered if I’d had a stroke.
The Star card fell from my fingers to the floor.
I watched it fall, like it was a snowflake in a dream, and I was in a land far, far away.
I watched myself drop the card, but at the same time I was inside the card.
Inside the Star tarot card!
Chapter 11
Ace of Wands: New Directions
What’s it like inside a tarot card? Not pleasant. It’s kind of a limbo, all smoky and shadowy. No smells, no colors, nothing solid, except for the stool I sat on; it’s like sitting in a genie bottle, but with no décor! If I look up I can see Maisie’s gift shop; it’s like looking out of a skylight.
For a short while I was able to transfer my thoughts back and forth from inside the gift shop to this forsaken place inside the Star card; I tried sending my thoughts out to that part of myself still back in the shop, but that doesn’t seem to be working anymore. Now I’m completely stuck inside this card, with my thoughts.
When I threw the tarot deck at Devon’s ass, and those cards crashed to the floor, and all those ghostly forms flew out of the cards, I had no idea what to think.
They’d escaped from the cursed deck, and I don’t blame them.
“You effing bitch. Get me out now!” I yelled up at the hole above.
I tried standing on the stool to get closer to the window up there. I reached way up and all I saw were my nails like sparkling stars against the dark backdrop of the shadow sky above me. Even though I can’t seem to climb out, and I can see a portion of the shop above, and I can hear everything.
A minute ago, I heard a bunch of strange voices. They sounded like first aid guys, like paramedics?
“Someone in here hurt?” I heard one of the guys ask.
I tried to get their attention, “Yes, I’m down a hole! Here I am!” But that didn’t seem to work. I heard Maisie, too. She sounded flustered when the paramedics arrived.
I heard Maisie say, “Guys! Careful. Don’t step on the cards. Watch it! That’s my Star card, let me get it.” I guess she picked up the card I’m in because my surroundings rocked a little, not like an earthquake or anything like that, but a gentle sway. “F#%ck! Don't step -- There! And there!” she said. I looked up and saw Maisie’ face, large, which meant I must be very, very tiny.
She shrunk me! This was some bad magic she used on me.
Then I saw one of the paramedics holding a handful of cards he’d collected. He stood really close to Maisie and looked down at the card she held, and he looked down at me. I heard him ask, “What kinda fortune cards are these? They look sexy.”
I looked up at him.
It was Devon! Disguised as one of the paramedics!
“Devon, get me out of here!” I hollered. He heard me because he looked right at me and gave me his pointy toothed grin. He took my card from Maisie’s hand because she disappeared from view and now all I saw was Devon’s sneering mouth.
“Me?” Devon giggled. “Get you out?” He stroked the card lovingly and I felt it. A very creepy vibe when he touched the card, like he’d touched me on my hair. When Devon stroked the card my fingernails sparkled even more! His attention made me want to do a little dance for him and my hands moved sens
ually across my body. I was his puppet and I couldn’t stop myself!
“We can make monkey,” I said, in a crazy sexy voice. Then I clapped my hands over my mouth.
I’d say anything to get out of there. He only giggled more stupidly. “Screw it -- I'm calling the cops,” I said. I still had my purse. I pulled out my cell and started calling. Devon stuck his big eyeball over the opening at the top of my card and chuckled. The vibrations of his laugh nearly made me drop the cell. “I'm calling my boyfriend and you'll wish the cops found you first.”
“Oh, no. The dud from last night?” he asked, sarcastically.
“You effing stalker,” I screamed at him. Now I was really angry, but what could I do? Then he did something gross and frightening. He stuck his long tongue down at me. I picked up the stool and held it like a lion tamer holds a chair to make a lion back off. I struck out at the tongue.
He pulled it back up.
I sat back on my stool to think, but I moved it as far from the skylight like opening as I could get.
“See Jane pose,” he said. Then his big hand covered the top of the card and everything went dark. But I could still hear Devon’s creepy thoughts.
Gotcha now Jane! You’re mine, like I promised. Gonna keep you forever. Jane, my little lovely love, I’ll get you a few things for your new home!
“Hey, don’t slide that card into your back pocket. You can’t keep that card!” I heard Maisie shout demands.
“I caught her! She’s mine, crazy Maisie.” Never get me to give you my Jane.
“And you’re mine, remember? Give her up Devon. You know I can make you sorry.”
“Keepin' her for myself, Maisie. I told you. I love her. Here, take the money and don’t bother me.”
“Don’t need your effing money. Devon, I’m serious. I will put you back in your card.”
Then I heard something I thought I’d never hear. Devon’s worried and frightened thoughts.
Oh, shit she’s holding up the Devil card. Oh, no, she’s tapping that effing card against my butt. Run!
“Return! Bye-bye, Devo. Cool your hels in your card, you fool! That’s where I should put you, inside the Fool card!”
“Effing bitches!”
Devon’s last words for a while.
For a few short moments, looking up through the opening in the card, Maisie appeared satisfied that Devon was well and truly trapped in his card. She held the Devil card up in triumph then showed me as she dropped his card nonchalant into the box with the other cards she’d gathered. She flipped over my card and my stool slipped a bit as the card went sideways.
“Maisie, get me out of here.”
“All in good time, my pretty.”
I had a clear view of Maisie. She looked down at me and gave me a wickedly gleeful smile. “I will hurt someone if you don't get me out,” I shouted at her. I didn’t plan to shut up, ever. I was going to keep talking until she got so sick of me; she had no choice but to let me go. “I have a date. I spent money for tonight. Let me out! At least for the date. I’ll come back. I promise!”
“I have someone I want you to meet, Jane.”
“Let me out, or you’ll hear from my lawyer!” I didn’t really have one, but I was sure I’d dated several, and I could find one in a pinch. But my threat didn’t work. Maisie held up a card for me to see. She ran it back and forth across the opening above me, so I could get the full picture. I shut up when I figured out what card she was showing me.
The death card.
“Jane, say hello to the death dealer.”
That made me nervous. Maisie didn’t seem like the serial killer type, but I’m sure that’s what all victims think of their killer until their final hour. Then without any further ado, the next thing I knew, Maisie sat beside me, inside my card, on her own stool.
“You're trapped,” she said, stating the obvious. “Now you’re bound to the deck.”
“You set me up. Rot in hell?" I said, refusing to look at her.
“Unless you play my game, that's what you'll do. The only one who can return the higher arcana specters to my tarot deck is you. You let them out, you need to bring them back.”
“How do I recapture them? Ask nicely?”
“That never worked for me,” she said smartly. “Trick them. Use all of your wiles and then some. You’ve got plenty of wiles.”
“Is this is going to take longer than a day?”
She gave an assuring nod that it would.
I couldn’t help rolling my eyes at her. “Let me at it.” Once I got out of this hole, I’d get out of Dodge, so to speak. But I guess Maisie figured that out too because she had something up her sleeve.
“Once you accept your fate --”
“I accept! How many ways can I say it? I'll sign in blood.”
“Don't let Devon hear you say that! When you've accepted your fate by agreeing to recapture the released characters, you'll be free of the Star card.”
“Just like that?” I snapped my fingers for sarcastic effect.
She snapped her fingers right back. I noticed her great manicure, and wanted to ask the name of her esthetician, but I was too pissed off at the moment. I closed my eyes, concentrated hard and repeated...I accept. I accept.” I opened one eye and looked around. I was still inside the card.
“You got to mean it,” she said, and gave me a beguiling smile. Then Maisie handed me a business card. “My lawyer if you really want to call one.”
Then she disappeared.
“Thanks.” I sat alone, on my stool, in my limbo. I took on the pose of “The Thinker” as I studied the card she gave me. Why me? I wondered. Then Maisie popped back in looking very regal and elegant. She reached into one of her pockets and pulled out Theodosia.
“In case you need a little incentive, collect all my specters in a timely manner and you get her back.”
I wanted Sia back more than anything! Maisie held Sia out to me but snatched her away when I tried to pet her.
“That’s not fair!” I cried.
“It’s not.” Maisie laughed and stroked Sia, and they both disappeared, but Sia’s sweet, kitten smile lingered on awhile longer.
Chapter 12
Queen of Wands
I’ve searched around in limbo land doing the same circular pattern for what felt like hours, and I always ended up back at the stool. I followed the same pattern. I got the idea to remove objects from my JW handbag and lined them up, so they formed a pattern using a lipstick tube as a tail, an eyebrow pencil and lip liner snapped in two to form four legs. Eventually, a crude picture of a cat emerged.
Once I dropped a candy mint in place for the eye, I felt the itch begin. The force pushed menacingly inside my sinuses as I chewed my bottom lip, aaachoooo! Omg -- the loudest most powerful explosion to date came out of me.
I became terribly frustrated until I heard an unexpected sound, soft at first then louder, like an approaching train whistle. “Meeeeerroooooow!”
“Sia! Come to mommy,” I called and clucked to her hoping she’d continue to cry out so that I might find her in the grey murky limbo of the card’s interior, or she’d find me.
Then, on my next walk around, I discovered a closet door. It loomed out of the grey limbo like a bright purple, green and orange, very psychedelic beacon. Maisie’s tarot reading room in the gift shop had a door with exactly the same type of décor as this one, covered in a gaudy purple wallpaper with a purple fleur de lis design from the 70’s, and the same soft and fuzzy touch on the wall paper --the bathroom door in the tarot reading room. I looked carefully at the busy pattern and found a small gold knob for the handle. I grabbed the little knob and voila, the entire backroom of Maisie’s shop appeared around me. If I let go of the knob everything around me disappeared and once again became grey limbo…
“…Meeeroooow!”
That cry came loud and clear from within the bathroom. I pulled open the door.
Inside it looked like a small white closet bathroom with a toilet, sink, hand
towel and a window, but no Sia.
I stood a moment, listened and realized I had to go, so I pulled the door shut and did my thing.
When I was done I stepped out. I was pleasantly surprised to find myself in the quiet back room of Maisie’s shop --afraid to let go of the knob on the bathroom door, in case everything disappeared; I did a quick release and grab.
Nothing changed. No more limbo.
I let go and waited. Yup, I was out of the Star card and back in the shop.
First thing I did was check the time. An hour ago I’d entered this shop and met Maisie. I called for her but she didn’t seem to be around. I called for Sia, but something told me I wasn’t going to find her either, not yet and not here.
I did notice that the tarot cards and table were all set up exactly as before. But one more item rested on the table, something new, and I was delighted to see it.
Sia’s rhinestone collar! Yes!
I grabbed her pretty pink collar and wrapped it around my wrist, the way I’d seen Devon wear it, but as I did that a strange sensation came over me; I became all woozy and wobbly, I felt as if the shop’s reality was slipping into a Dali-esque world. I stumbled about and grabbed the tablecloth for support and once again brought everything crashing to the ground.
“Hey,” a voice called to me loud and clear. “Meeerrrow! Hey!”
“Sia?” I snatched the table cloth and pulled it out of the way. There, underneath the table, sat my dainty little kitten. I reached for her. She was real and purred like a tiny outboard.
“Sia, Sia.” I nuzzled her and held her close and she purred even more, which didn’t seem possible. “Oh, Sia, I don’t know what’s going on? I think I’m on a bad acid trip or something.” All around us the world looked like a dripping wet surreal painting, nothing had any structured form.
“No.” Sia said.
I held her away from me, stared hard into her beautiful blue eyes. “Yes,” I said right back to her. “I am on an acid trip. You’re talking. I’m convinced Maisie drugged me, and when I recover I’ll find myself lying on the floor of her shop with a big headache!” As I spoke to Sia a horrible sound filled the shop, almost as if someone was power-washing outside. I tried to make it stop by giving my head a shake.