It was an easy decision, but the worst burden I ever had to bear.
Over the weeks that followed, I thought about it constantly, confronting my motivations over, and over, and over again, just to make sure that I wasn’t just succumbing to normal pregnancy hormones and being selfish in having my baby.
Every time I considered the fact that I might be dooming the entirety of humanity with my stupid decision, my gut was right there to contradict me.
This was right. I was sure.
And it helped that Alex and Nate both supported me. They insisted it was my body, my decision. Both avoided giving any sort of opinion at all, preferring instead to support whatever I wanted at that time.
Surprisingly, it was Metatron that helped ease my mind the most. One hot afternoon, he joined me for a quiet game of chess in the bungalow, and told me that even if I terminated the life growing inside me, the energy would just move to another girl that would fit the energetic profile. The apocalypse was happening eventually, whether it was me or someone else.
That was the kicker for me. I didn’t want any other girl to have to go through this. And there was no other woman on Earth that was better supported than what I was. It would have to be me. I just had to face it.
Once that decision was made, everything else just fell into place. It was going to be my mission to try and make sure the world didn’t end.
I had some ideas. My first one was that I could try to do whatever I could to ease the congestion in Hell. Logic would dictate that if Hell wasn't jam-packed with screaming, tortured souls, then it wouldn’t bust open. My theory was that if I could try to help as many souls process their pain and suffering, they'd ascend to a higher vibration and leave Hell immediately. Once they made the transition safely, they could either go on to reincarnate on Earth, rest in Heaven, or take up the mantle of Ascended Guardian.
I’d been successful in helping Hannah Savage, my mortal enemy, escape from the clutches of her own Hell. That was going to be my first starting point: Trying to figure out precisely what I did that caused her to ascend so quickly. It would have been great if I could have asked her, but she’d immediately gone to join the ranks of Ascended Guardians and was nowhere to be found.
The Guardians were shepherds for the living. Their chosen occupation for the rest of eternity was to whisper, nudge, and cajole humans into the right places, so that they could make better decisions about their lives. The end goal was to ensure that when the person died, they were in a better position to process the painful karma that bounded back onto them tenfold.
Ascended Guardians, from what I could tell, were ditzy to the point of incomprehension. They were intuition personified, so they didn’t really make a hell of a lot of sense whenever you had to deal with them.
Alex’s father Leif was an Ascended Guardian. Alex had told me that his dad regularly drove him nuts: appearing, disappearing, giving strange instructions, and then refusing to explain them. Knowing this, I had little hope that I could track down Hannah Savage, the newest Guardian on the block, and ask her exactly what it was that helped her process her pain so quickly.
Our only option was to experiment, and the opportunity had arose straight away. Nate had come to me and asked me if I would try and help his mother. She'd been suffering in Hell for a thousand years.
Nate’s father - a terrifyingly sexy Archangel called Malach - was firmly on the no-sin-at-any-cost side. The angels were committed to trying to get humans to be better people while they were alive. Of course, it didn’t work very well. Various religious organizations had taken it upon themselves to decide what actually constituted a sin, and what didn't. But, because power corrupts, a lot of churches tended to focus on controlling the masses and making money rather than making sure that their people didn’t do things that caused pain.
Nate's mother Aurelia had been a devout woman in her lifetime, determined to avoid any of the conventional sins. But of course, all of us have unkind thoughts, and commit little slights on our friends. Despite avoiding what the Church told her was a sin, she was probably as bitchy as the next person from time to time.
Consequently she’d been moaning and crying in Hell for over a thousand years, unable to understand why she felt so awful and unable to move past the pain.
Malach, as an Archangel, was an expert in helping souls process their pain once they understood why they were feeling it. He hadn’t prepared Aurelia properly for death, so she had no idea why she felt so bad. He wasn’t able to get her to understand, despite trying for hundreds of years.
With the help of Nimue, Zel and the half-breed boys, we called Aurelia into a circle and spoke to her. At first, she drifted around the circle, moaning in pain, not recognizing anything. Unlike the last time, Alex wouldn’t let me get into the circle, so I couldn’t test to see if it was anything I did that helped.
Apparently, my boyfriend did have a problem with overprotectiveness after all.
On impulse, I told Nimue to drop the boundary. I had a hunch, and I thought it was worth checking. Aurelia wasn’t too violent, so I didn't think there would be a problem, even though she could have escaped and caused some damage.
It worked. Apparently, the thing that caused Aurelia the most pain was her jealous thoughts of her husband’s ex. When she was alive, she’d known that Malach had loved another woman, in a profound, passionate way.
She just hadn’t known that the other woman was a demon. She had been jealous. When Nimue dropped the boundary and faced her, telling her who she was, Aurelia realized that the pain she was feeling was the negative energy she’d put out into the world, coming back on to her. She had processed her pain quickly, just as quickly as Hannah Savage had done. Cocooned in Malach’s arms, and with her son holding her hands, Aurelia had managed to neutralize all her pain. When she was ready to move on, she had chosen to reincarnate into another body.
She was determined to get the living-without-sin thing right.
Malach was overwhelmingly grateful. And I was optimistic about the future.
I wanted to try it again, and soon. I’d been trying to convince Alex that I didn’t have to be in the circle to get the soul to ascend - that Aurelia’s case proved that it was nothing to do with me, and everything to do with facing the cause of their sin.
Alex didn’t buy it though. He pointed out that to get Nimue to meet Aurelia, she’d had to drop the boundary. In turn I’d been exposed to Aurelia's soul. So it might have been something to do with me after all.
We still weren’t sure.
I let out a loud sigh.
“You okay, sweetheart?” Clover rubbed my back. “I don’t know why you insist on still working. Alex must be loaded. He’s got enough cash to support you until the day you die.”
That day might be sooner than we all think, I thought glumly. But I put on a happy face. “I’m just doing it to spite him,” I winked at her. “Seriously, Clover, I can’t leave you alone on the desk. I wouldn’t do that to you.”
“You’re a honey,” she blew me a kiss. “Things have been weird, huh? I guess we should still be grateful that we have jobs. Especially since Mr. Savage disappeared.”
“It’s worked out. Martin deserved the promotion to site manager.”
“I agree, he’s the best. Now he’s on days, I miss him,” Clover pouted. “I have to say, since Mr. Savage donated the resort to a non-profit, I feel like everything I do is for charity. It’s nice.”
I nodded. “It is.” I felt a warm glow in my belly.
I had no idea what happened to Bentleigh Savage. I wasn’t sure if the Quarters had murdered him or not. It was really the last thing I wanted to worry about. What I did know was that the Quarters were now scared out of their minds, thanks to Nate and Alex. The Quarters now knew everything about life after death. They knew that when the end came, it would be attracted to darkness.
Nothing says ‘cesspool of negative energy’ like a secret group of men who did anything they liked so they could control the world.
Alex
and Nate had made them see sense. They were fully committed to dismantling their empires, and donating everything to charitable works, just on the off-chance they’d live through the apocalypse.
It was happening quietly, but slowly and surely, and I was proud. Alex had even heard that some of the Quarters had converted, for want of a better word. There were a couple of them, who, after donating their immense wealth to the poor, had had spiritual awakenings. They’d fallen completely off the radar, and had retired to live in off-grid spiritual communities. Last I heard, one of them had started up his own commune.
Because the last thing to die was always hubris.
Whatever. I was happy that it had all worked out. Also, as an added bonus, the Quarters were leaving the Pope alone. Before we’d scared the Quarters stupid, they were planning on having him assassinated, as he’d started giving the Church’s immense wealth away. The Church was a cornerstone of the Quarter’s wealth and influence, and they had been furious to be losing it. The newly elected Pope was determined to reform the Church doctrine, stripping away everything back to basics: Give all your excess wealth to the poor, judge not, do unto others, and love thy neighbor… that sort of thing.
It had made huge waves around the world. I was glad it was going to continue.
But because the world wasn’t falling down around my feet yet, I still had a job to do.
“Besides,” I nudged Clover, “I’ve got a few more months. I’m not going to leave you in the lurch.”
She grinned at me and went back to her stapling.
I had a bunch of invoicing to do, so I got to it. Mundane work was always quite soothing for me; I liked checking figures and making sure things balanced and added up. For a while, I lost myself in the satisfying numbness of checking things off a list.
I was almost finished when suddenly, I felt the atmospheric pressure drop. I glanced around nervously. Someone was arriving.
Someone supernatural.
I’d always been sensitive to surges in energy, but now that I was pregnant, it was heightened. I took a deep breath and looked sideways at Clover. She was stapling invoices and clearly hadn’t noticed anything strange happen.
I glanced outside. It was pitch-black, the clouds gathered close on the horizon blocking the moon and stars. Revelations was isolated, far from any major cities, so there was no light pollution. If the sky was overcast, the nights were as dark as black velvet.
We liked to keep it dark around the resort, too. The guests enjoyed the extra frisson and mystery it gave.
I wondered who was coming?
I was well protected. Nate and Alex were taking turns to guard me. There were others - at least three tiny Hell-Imps were swinging around in the trees out there, as well as two chubby, cheery-faced Katadonis.
I’d had to get used to having the Katadonis around. At first, I’d thought that they were all the same; sneering, sanctimonious messengers of the Angelic Realm. But Malach had convinced me that the ones I’d met were in the minority. Most of the cherubs were jolly little people-pleasers, and wouldn’t hurt a fly. Still, they made me a bit nervous.
Through the glass doors that lead out towards the bungalows, I spotted an imp and a cherub playing tag in the trees.
I let out a breath I’d been holding. They clearly weren’t nervous about the energy surge. I probably had no need to be either. Still, the pressure built.
Suddenly, the front doors blew open, and two big figures swaggered into the reception.
I recognized them instantly.
“Dale!” I yelped his name in delight.
My friend came bounding towards me, a big smile on his face. “Eve! Clover! I’ve missed you guys!”
“I’ve missed you too,” I said, burrowing into his warm hug. Dale was a big guy, cuddly like a bear, and the sweetest man that ever lived. “You’ve been gone too long.”
“Whoa. Girl!” he shrieked, pulling me back and staring at my belly in wonder. “I didn’t think I’d been gone that long. You’re freaking huge!”
I grimaced. “I’m not that big. Just a little over seven months pregnant now.”
“It seemed like only yesterday that I went away!” There was a little crinkle of confusion in Dale’s forehead. Luckily, Clover went in for a hug.
“Time flies when you’re having fun, honey,” a smooth voice boomed from the entrance.
I looked up to see Zel, the mighty earth-bound demon, struggling with twelve bags of luggage wrapped around his massive arms.
I rolled my eyes and pressed a button on the desk. “Let me get a porter, Zel,” I told him.
He shook his head. “We picked up some gear in Marrakesh that’s not strictly legal,” he said to me in a hushed tone, one glinty eye on his boyfriend.
Clover and Dale weren’t paying us any attention. They were chatting excitedly about his holiday.
“Since when have you ever been worried about legalities?” I asked him. “Or any sin, for that matter?”
Zel looked offended. “I don’t want Dale to get in trouble.”
“Well. How the mighty have fallen!” I gave him a nudge.
“I fell eons ago, Eve,” Zel said sassily. “This falling is different. It's falling into a pit of the most sublime gorgeous feelings ever to be created. And love clearly makes you do funny things.”
“Clearly,” I smirked at him. “So, you’re back for good?”
Zel nodded. “I told you I’d come back to help in the final days. Just wanted to have one last vacation,” he said, his eyes softening as he stared at Dale. “Make the most of every beautiful thing this world has to offer.”
I gagged.
Dale spotted my vomit-reaction. “Oh, Eve, do you still have morning sickness?”
“No,” I replied. “Zel is grossing me out.”
Dale met Zel’s eyes again, and they exchanged a hot stare.
“You were gone a whole month,” I said loudly.
Dale frowned. “That can’t be right,” he said. “It only felt like a week or so.”
“Well, thanks for finally coming back,” Clover said, punching Dale on the arm and jolting him out of his love-fest. “The three amigos, together on the desk again!”
“I literally just walked in the door, Clover.”
“As if you could help right now anyway. Your timing is perfect.” Clover pointed to the clock. “Our shift is over in five minutes.”
I sprawled against the desk, relaxed and happy. If the world was going to end soon, this is how I wanted it. Surrounded by my friends. Cocooned by all the people I loved.
A slight wind blew through reception, and I caught a spicy-sweet scent on the breeze. Weaving through it was a clean, fresh-ocean smell.
I smiled. Alex and Nate were here to pick me up.
Nate walked through the door first. Dark and lean, with sleek-muscled grace, he stalked into reception like a predatory cat. He nodded at Zel as he came in, his face cool and smooth.
“I see the circus is back in town,” he said, the words falling softly from his full, perfect lips.
Zel smiled widely back. “Baby-Daddy Number Two,” he saluted Nate, and I blushed red-hot. “I bet this place has been devoid of fun since I left,” Zel added.
Nate shrugged, unbothered by the teasing. “I think our definitions of the word ‘fun’ are probably wildly different.”
“Oh, I don’t know,” Zel leered. “I think we do have a few things in common.” He waggled his eyes toward me.
“Quit it, Zel,” I grumbled at him.
“Never.”
Nate smiled serenely. “Don’t hold back on my account.”
At first, I had thought it was some sort of self-flagellation thing that Nate was doing. When we’d found out that I was pregnant, and that either Nate or Alex was the father, Nate was mired in an awful amount of guilt. It had taken a little while for him to accept the fact that Alex truly forgave him for what we had done. And for my part, although I was still ashamed, I was feeling good about how everything was playing o
ut. After Nate had gotten over his overwhelming shame, he was quite taken with the idea that he could be a father.
Alex understood him. After the first bout of fighting, when their human sides had to beat each other senseless, they both accepted the inevitable. None of us wanted to give up anything. We all loved each other - Alex and I were lovers, Nate and Alex were the best of friends, Nate loved me like a sister, and I loved him like a big brother.
Nate was also now my sensei, of sorts. He had started teaching me things about the way the universe worked, about the flow of energy that makes up every living thing. While Alex thought I was perfect exactly the way I was, Nate had decided that I was woefully lacking in a spiritual education, so he’d taken it upon himself to fill the gaps. Nate thought that if I could understand the energy that pulsed through me, I could start to work with it. He thought it would help.
I found it all fascinating. It was half quantum physics, half insane woo-woo spirituality.
Nate was an excellent teacher. Alex, more of a blunt-force than gentle flow kind of guy, was happy to leave the instruction up to him.
It sounded gross, but we had become a weird, happy little family. So while the shame of behaving like a total hoe wasn’t going to subside anytime soon, things were working out.
Although I was going to have to get Zel to shut the hell up.
“Quit with the teasing, demon,” I muttered. “You’re too late anyway. We’re all real comfortable with our current situation.”
“I’ve been gone a month,” Zel whined. “I have some catching up to do. I have a big bag of double-entendres I have to use up.”
“I wouldn't.” Alex’s voice was a low growl beside me.
I breathed in his seductive chocolate and fireworks scent, turned, and smiled at my lover. He was standing so close that he took up all my vision. The breadth of his shoulders was stunning; packed with hard muscle under his golden-toned skin. His hair was loose tonight; shoulder-length, each tousled lock falling perfectly into place, showing off his hard jawline and his penetrating icy-blue eyes.
I swallowed heavily. The plain white t-shirt Alex was wearing highlighted his sculpted chest and clung enticingly to the hard planes of his stomach.
Revelations: The Last War Page 2