by West, TJ
“No.”
“I hear it’s going to be the wedding of the year.”
“Looks like it,” I shrug. “So what’s your connection to the band?”
“I’m their manager.” Lyric takes a sip of her cocktail; some pink, foo foo drink.
“Oh, cool.”
“Yeah, the guys have reeled me in. Although I’d prefer to be associated with them only for business stuff.”
“Why’s that?”
“Oh, you know…getting caught up on the personal side of things is not how I’d like to do my job, but they’re really nice guys. I like them.” Just then, her phone starts buzzing. “Oh, ‘scuse me. I have to take this.” She leaves to go inside the house. I am not going to judge her by that pink drink, but she seems a bit modish and preppy, like she doesn’t feel comfortable being with a bunch of rockers and their minions. Wonder what got her into being JINKS’ manager? Guess I’ll never know because she took that phone call and suddenly up and left the party.
I have just downed my second beer as Harmony makes her way over to me. She and Danny were off doing something. My sister is now finally a part of the sex world. Took her long enough. She was a virgin at twenty-six when she met Danny. It was a long time coming, but he managed to pop her cherry for good. I like the guy. He’s really good for Harmony. In the beginning I wanted to beat the shit out of him when he broke up with her, and went on tour without a phone call or text. After months of separation they reunited and haven’t been apart since. They make each other happy, which makes me happy for Harmony. She’s done so much for me, she deserves a chance at love.
“Hey,” Harmony nudges my arm.
“Hey, Sister,” I nudge her back.
“Is your bike working better?”
“Much.” I take a deep breath. I’m going to tell her about my guitar lessons. Wonder what she’s going to say? “So…Wayne is teaching me how to use the guitar with my left hand. We started today, before everyone came over.”
“He what? Seriously?”
“Yup. Seriously.”
“That’s great, Mel. Wow. I’m really proud of you.” I can tell she has more to say, or lecture. Sometimes it feels as if I’m the younger sister.
“But?” I clip at her.
“But, please be careful and listen to what I told you this morning. Unless you’ve changed your mind, and you’ve decided to try a relationship with him?”
I shake my head. “No, I haven’t changed my mind, but if he’s willing to help me with getting my career back, I need to stick this out and allow him to help me.”
“So you’re just using him?”
The fuck she just say? “Using him?” I hiss. I am now extremely pissed off. “What the hell, Sister!” I try as best I can to keep my voice low, I don’t want to make a scene. “I can’t believe you really think that low of me.” I scoot from the chair, then make my way back inside the house.
“Mel!”
I hear Harmony calling after me, but there is no way in hell I am going back. Tears are stinging behind my eyes, ready to fall. How could my own sister say something so cruel, so shallow to me? I really thought she wanted me to be happy, that getting my musical talent back would make her realize - Oh no. Shit! I stop in my tracks. She’s right. Hell, she is fucking right! I am using Wayne. I’m using him for my own selfish advantages. While I almost begged him not to help me, I let him do it. He now thinks I am going to be in this for the long haul - forever. No. I can’t let him assume we’re a couple. He definitely doesn’t deserve me lying to him or leading him on any further. It has to end. Now. Tonight. I’ve got to get out of here. I gather my things as quickly as possible, then race out of the house.
I am almost to my bike when I hear Wayne running after me. “Hey, Sweetness, wait up! Where ya going?”
I ignore his panic tone and proceed to saddle onto my bike. “Sorry, Sexy, but I’ve gotta run.”
He grasps onto my wrist. “Where to? I thought we were having a good time.”
“We were, but,” I let out a breath. “…have fun with everyone.”
“You’re running away,” he states. “Why? Did something happen?”
“Talk to you later, alright?”
He palms the sides of my face, then pleads with me. “Please, Baby, don’t run away from me.”
“My sister’s right,” I choke out. “I’m going to hurt you, Wayne.”
“Your sister? Why would she say a thing like that?”
“Because it’s true!” I yell. “She doesn’t want to see you get hurt, and I don’t blame her.” I jerk my face away from his hold. “We need to end this.”
“Like hell we do! Don’t I have a say in this? Come on, Melody!” I wince from the rise in his voice. He’s never raised his voice in my presence. Fuck, this is killing me.
“I’m sorry,” I whisper. “Thank you for today…for everything.” I quickly place the helmet on my head, rev up my bike and zoom off.
I needed to leave as fast as possible because my tears blinded my vision the second I turned on the engine.
I have to get far away from here and Vegas is the place to go; the small road trip is good for thinking. I need to clear my head and decide if staying in San Diego is the right thing for me.
THIS DIDN’T JUST FUCKING HAPPEN! One minute Melody and I are having a great day - we woke up together, fucked each other, showered together, made progress on her guitar lessons and spent the evening with our friends - next she’s breaking up with me. She rode off like I didn’t even matter. Her sister put something in her head to screw everything I have invested in my relationship with her. I was finally planting a seed inside her heart, letting her know we are meant to be together. Fuck! I have never felt this kind of anger before. I am pissed off that Melody listened to her sister and decided to run away from me. I need to speak with Harmony, but I gotta do it cool. I can’t lose my temper. Yet, what I am feeling for her right now must be exactly what she felt about me when Danny broke up with her. Fucking karma.
The guys are looking at me when I come out onto the patio. They can see I am pissed. They don’t see it often, but they know when I am lit - they fucking know. I walk up to Harmony and rudely interrupt her conversation with Faith. She knows exactly what this is about. Her eyes say it all. “I need to talk to you,” I say, as calmly as possible. She slowly gets up and walks into the house. I follow her into the kitchen. I cross my arms, then ask, “What did you say to Melody?”
“Wayne, I am so sorry -”
I raise up my hand, “Stop,” and snap at her. “Spare me the runaround. Just tell me what you said.”
“I said she was using you, and that she was going to hurt you and it would be best to break things off.”
I stand very still. I keep my arms crossed, look down and do my best to breathe. “I don’t get angry very easily. It takes a lot for someone to piss me off.” I pause, then continue. “You have stepped over the line and it doesn’t sit well with me.”
“I’m sorry, but look who’s talking,” she argues with me. “You butted in my relationship with Danny and it almost destroyed us!”
She’s right, I did and I’ll never do it again. “Lesson was learned. Never meant for you to do the same to me.”
“Again, I’m sorry, but my sister does not stick around long enough to fight. She’s a runner. She’ll hurt you - not on purpose, but that’s how she is.”
“I guess you don’t know your sister all that well then.”
“Excuse me?”
I inch my way closer to her, to tell her exactly what I think. She just pissed me off even more. “She feels something for me. I know she does. And for you to mess all that up because you’re so worried about my ego being bruised? You’re not who I thought you were either.” Her eyes widen and I know I’ve struck a nerve.
“We got a problem?” Danny asks, in a defensive tone. I don’t blame the dude. I’d do the same thing if I were in his shoes.
I am still looking in Harmony’s bugged out eyes;
she’s on the verge of crying. I don’t like knowing I am the cause of it, but I don’t regret a single word. “No. We’re done here.” I swiftly walk off, accidentally bumping shoulders with Danny. Thank God he didn’t try to punch me. I’d have him down in less than a second.
Lucky, Slim and Jason are inside the house. They must have thought with Danny protecting his girl, there was going to be a fight. I briefly look outside on the patio. June and Phillip are talking with Faith. Faith keeps looking back at Harmony. She’s worried about her friend. Just as she gets up to come inside, I head out the front door. I’ve got to find Melody.
Lucky and the others follow me out. “You okay?” Lucky asks. He puts a hand on my shoulder, stopping me.
I turn around. “No, not really.”
“Need a shot? I can make something in the back for ya?” Slim suggests.
“No. I need to go find Melody.”
Lucky pipes in again. “You want me to come with? Not sure you’re okay driving.”
“I’m okay to drive, Luck. I need to do this on my own. Gotta find out what the fuck is going on with her,” I irritatedly answer back.
“I hear ya.”
Jason speaks up, “Call us if you need anything. We’re here for ya.”.
“I will. Thanks, man.”
Next, Slim pitches the the van keys in my direction. “Keys, bro.”
“Thanks. Hopefully by the time I get home, Melody will be with me.”
“Hope she does too. I like her. She’s a cool chick,” Slim adds.
No doubt she’s a cool chick. A fucking hot one too. She’s perfect for me and no one else will ever come close to her. My eyes and heart have it in for her. Now it’s just convincing her that I’m it for her as well.
I screech the van into the parking lot. I see Melody’s bike before going inside the building. Glad she’s home. Gives me some hope that she’ll hear me out. I race up the stairs, skipping four steps at a time, until I make it to her floor.
I start banging on the door. “Melody, open up! Come on, Baby!” I wait a couple seconds. I hear shuffling inside, so I know she’s trying to avoid me. I start banging again. “I know you’re in there. Saw your bike in the parking lot.” Someone in her complex opens their door and tells me to shut the fuck up. I ignore the neighbor and keep banging. “Sweetness, I’m not leavin’ unless I get arrested for disturbing the peace. Won’t look good on the front pages of People Magazine! Don’t say I didn’t warn ya, cuz the fucking paps are out there.” Just as I pulled toward the building, the paparazzi recognized my van and started clicking their damn cameras. I’m sure they got a nice shot of my face.
I’m about to bang again when Melody whips open the door. “For fucks sake, get in here!” she hisses at me. I step inside with a grin. I knew she couldn’t hold out. “Make it quick. I’m leaving in a few minutes.”
“Leave to where?”
She walks over to her backpack, zips it up and says, “Vegas.”
What the fuck? “Really, Babe, what the hell are you doin’? This is crazy, you know that? Listening to your sister, changing your mind about us.”
“Harmony didn’t change my mind,” she huffs, then steps near me by the sofa bed. She points at my chest. “You knew, from the beginning, that this so called relationship was nothing other than good sex.”
Good sex? Hell no. “Fucking phenomenal sex,” I mumble. “Things change for good reasons. What we talked about in the beginning is not how I’m feeling today. And I know for a fact you feel differently for me as well.”
“You’re so wrong,” she chuckles. “I have never given you any hints on any false feelings.”
“You’re bullshitting me, Baby.” Melody gasps. I close in on her by backing her up against the arm of the couch. I will not let her squirm away from me. Just like I did at the studio the other day, I cage her in. “You wanna know how I know you have feelings for me?” Our lips are mere inches apart. I look into her heated green eyes and set her lie straight. “The way you look at me when you go down on me, when I go down on you. You take it all in as if it’s the only time we’ll ever be together. Your heart rate changes when I make you come. You have never had an orgasm so powerful with anyone else. I make you beg. You love that. You love it rough, you love it soft. That’s making love, Sweetness.”
“Stop it. Just stop it.” Her voice hitches and her breathing becomes erratic. I’m hittin’ the right spot.
So, I continue. “We make such good music together, and it’s not only in bed. You felt it today when I helped you with the guitar. There is an energy between us. It’s out of this world.” I caress her cheek bone. She flinches a bit, trying to not feel what I am saying is true. “We also make each other laugh. I’ve seen you laugh and it’s adorable as fuck. We both joke around, have fun and try not to take things too seriously. You know I’m right, Baby.”
She continues to shake her head and ignores her true feelings for me. “Have you ever lost anyone in your life? Have you?”
Where the hell did this question come from? “What -”
“Don’t you remember? I lost two of the most important people in my life - my parents. They were everything to me, and it still kills me to this day,” her voice cracks. “The day they died I made a promise to myself - I would never, ever love anyone, ever again. In a flash that someone could be ripped away from me. I will not allow that to happen.”
I know how she’s feeling. What she has gone through in life, shouldn’t happen to anyone. However, I do know she’s using her excuse as a shield. She doesn’t want to get hurt again, but it’s a shield that is old and withered. Time to let it go. I back away from “the cage” and give us some space. I place my hands on my hips. “This is foolish talk.”
“Are you fucking serious?” she yells. “How dare you! It’s my life, my choice!”
Here goes nothin’. I haven’t spoken about this for a very long time, but it takes a very special woman to hear it. “You wanna know if I’ve lost someone? I have. Had a girlfriend in high school. Knocked her up, cuz I was stupid and didn’t wear a fucking condom. We decided on abortion. And just like you, it still fucking kills me. I’d do anything to go back in time and help bring that baby into the world. Help raise him or her, but we knew we didn’t have the knowledge or money to raise it. Yeah, we could have put it up for adoption, but we were only sixteen years old. She was terrified of her parents finding out. So we went to mine and they helped us get the abortion.” I pause and take a deep breath. Bringing up the worse moment of my life aches something awful as fuck. My head is now clear. When I look back into her eyes, though, she’s crying. I need to hold her, so I wrap her up in my arms. She allows me to do so, and it feels amazing. “What I’m trying to make you understand is, I don’t let it walk all over me, or let it decide my future. Life goes on, Baby. You can’t live in fear your whole life thinking someone is going to die just because you get too close. That’s not living.” She squeezes me tightly around the waist and I can hear her softly crying, sniffling. I lift her face up with both hands and tell her, “Babe. Be with me. Only me.” With those watering green pools, I give each a kiss on the lids, then bend down and kiss her trembling lips. I taste salt, and all good things possible when our tongues dance. She can’t deny me any longer. I slowly take off her black leather jacket, then gather the ends of her white shirt and pull it up, over her head. She does the same for me. Then we’re both unlatching each other’s belts on our jeans. I unbutton her pants, she unbuttons mine. It’s as if we can’t get enough of one another. We can’t seem to rip our clothes off fast enough. We start to laugh when one of my boots doesn’t come off easily. She helps me tug it off and proceeds to rub her hands all over my chest. Her hands melt into me. Feels fucking out of this world. Next thing I know she has my cock wrapped in her hand and starts to fist me, suck me. There is no other woman who has ever taken her time on my junk. She starts sucking slow, deep within in her throat - the woman has fucking awesome gag reflex - then begins to drive herself
down faster until I am almost ready to combust. Just as fast though, she slows down again, making me sweat and growl. She doesn’t want it to end in her mouth. She wants me to fuck her long and hard, deep inside her body.
We never exchange words. Our bodies, fingers, mouths, eyes, say everything - she fucking loves me. I don’t need her to tell me with her words. I already feel it and taste it.
Her bed creaks as I lay on top of her, enter her wet pussy, balls deep. We both moan, groan, move like music until we are fucking spent. Exhausted. We fall asleep, wrapped in each other’s naked arms and legs.
This is what life is all about: It’s finding your soulmate and never wanting to let go. Yet when the one person you thought was going to be in your life forever, disappears? Your soul is left out to dry. You can no longer breathe. That’s exactly what it feels like when I wake up and find Melody has left my arms; her clothes, backpack and helmet are gone. She fucking left me.
I didn’t get home until the middle of the night. The party was over, the house was dark and my bed was still unmade with the leftovers of mine and Melody’s time together. I had no desire to sleep on those sheets. The thought of it made me sick. I took the couch instead and didn’t sleep for the rest of the night. Watched the first and second The Fast and Furious movies until it was time to get up and take a shower. On the way to the studio, Slim asked me if I wanted to talk about it. Nope. I just needed to forget about her and play my bass. We’re over. No reason to discuss it. I’m ready to get my old life back and focus on the fans, women and music. That’s who I am. I don’t need a fucking relationship. Takes too much time to build, and to trust someone. Not worth it. Not anymore. I did everything I could to make things right, to have her see we were worth a shot. She made her choice. End of story.
On another note, we have big things coming our way. We’ll be going to New York to perform on The Tonight Show, then before we go on our big summer tour we are performing on the iHeart Music Awards. It’s flippin’ unbelievable. We leave for New York the day after my birthday. I seriously can’t wait for all this to start. I need all these things to distract me, to help me focus; my fucking cock needs a break.