by Todd, E. L.
“Sadie!”
I walked past him. “Leave me alone, Ethan.”
“No,” he snapped. “Listen to me.” He grabbed my arm, but I jerked it away.
“Touch me again and I’ll scream for help.”
His eyes softened in despair. “Please listen to me, Sadie. Please.”
“Fuck off, Ethan. Go away and leave me the hell alone.” I walked toward the door.
“Just listen to me! That wasn’t what you thought it was.”
I tried to open the door but he held it closed. “I couldn’t care less, Ethan. Now let me pass. I never want to see you again—I mean it.”
“I wasn’t cheating on you.”
“I’m sure,” I said sarcastically.
“That was my sister.”
I rolled my eyes. “Nice try.”
He pressed his weight against the door and blocked the entrance. “I’m not lying.” He clenched his jaw as he stared at me. “That was my sister and niece and nephew. I can prove it to you, Sadie.”
I shook my head. “Fuck you.”
He opened his wallet and showed me a picture of the woman. “She’s my sister. Please tell me you see the resemblance? We are fraternal twins.”
I didn’t look. “Get out of my way, Ethan.”
“Sadie, listen to me.”
“No, you listen,” I snapped. “I gave myself to you and you turned out to be a lying cheat like my brother said you were. You didn’t trust me to go out with my friends alone, but you were the one fucking a wife behind my back. If you have any decency, please just let me go. I need to be alone and get back on my feet. All you’re doing is torturing me.”
“No, I’m not leaving because I didn’t cheat on you.”
“Then why were you all going into your apartment?”
He sighed. “Because I live with them.”
I narrowed my eyes.
He ran his fingers through his hair. “I didn’t want to tell you that just yet. I wanted to wait until you came over for dinner.”
“Tell me what?”
“That my sister’s husband passed away a few years ago and now I’m their sole provider. I can’t afford my own place in addition to their apartment, so we just live together.”
I was still suspicious. “And why would you want to hide that?”
“Because I’m totally broke. I pay for everything, and I’m saving for the kid’s college tuitions. What girl wants to be with a man that already supports a family?”
My eyes softened. “That changes nothing, Ethan.”
He smiled. “So you believe me?”
“I—I didn’t say that.”
“Come over after work and I’ll prove it to you. She’s my sister—that’s it. I’m not married or cheating on you.”
“Really?” I felt my heart thaw from the ice.
“Yeah,” he said with a smile. “How could you ever think otherwise?”
“I—I don’t know.”
“If you hadn’t avoided me, I could have explained this a week ago.”
“I’m sorry.”
“And why the fuck were you with Alex?”
I felt my heart fall.
“You were the one caught in a dead lie. You weren’t where you said you were, and your brother was nowhere in sight. If anything, I’m the one who should be pissed. I did nothing wrong. You’re the liar, Sadie.” His eyes looked like they would burst in flame.
“I didn’t mean to end up with Alex. It—it just happened. I swear.”
He stared at me. “And how did that come about?”
“I was with Jared and he set me up with Alex. I didn’t want to be there. When I was running from him, I ran into you. I’m sorry, Ethan. I’m not lying.”
He still looked livid. “You should have fucking called me.”
“I know. It won’t happen again. I’m sorry.” I was afraid I was going to lose him again, but this time it would be all my fault. He wanted me to stay away from Alex because he wasn’t trustworthy and he turned out to be dead on about it. I didn’t listen to him. “Ethan, I mean it. I’m sorry.”
His eyes softened. “I want to stay pissed at you, but I can’t. I’ve missed you so much this past week.”
“I missed you too.”
“Promise me you’ll talk to me next time you’re angry with me.”
“Done.”
“Thank you.”
“I’m sorry.”
“And I don’t want you alone with Alex anymore. I didn’t want it to come to this but he crossed a line he can never uncross.” He paused as he stared at me, daring me to defy him.
“Ethan.”
“No. I was right the entire time. You denied my request because I wasn’t being reasonable, but I was. I don’t want you to be around someone that is intent on making you leave me. I would never spend time with someone that acted that way. Out of respect for me, you will do this. I will not compromise on this. You can do whatever you want, go wherever you want, hug whoever you want, but not Alex.
I sighed. “I understand.”
He raised an eyebrow, surprised that I actually agreed. How could I not? He was totally right. I didn’t trust Alex at all anymore. If the situation was reversed, I would be just as pissed. “I mean it, Sadie.”
“I know.”
“He lost his friendship privileges.”
I nodded.
He sighed. “I wish I didn’t have to go to work right now.”
“Me too.”
He grabbed my face and kissed my forehead. “You’re mine as soon as I get off work.”
“I’ll be waiting. Koku too.”
He smiled. “I’ll see you then, baby.” He kissed me again then walked away.
“Ethan?”
He turned around and looked at me.
“I really am sorry about everything.”
“I know.”
13
When I got to my apartment, Ethan was standing outside. He was leaning against the wall with a bag over his shoulder. I approached the door and he smiled at me.
He stared at me for a long time. “I forgot how beautiful you are.”
“Uh, thanks.”
He sighed. “Do we have to start all over again?”
I smiled. “Sorry.” I opened the door and we walked inside. When the door was closed, he dropped his bag to the floor then grabbed me, picking me up in his arms.
“Ethan, I’m so sorry.”
He carried me into the bedroom then laid me on the bed. He was undressing himself with lightning speed. “Sex now. Talk later.”
I removed my clothes while I stared at his naked body. When he grabbed my underwear, he ripped the seam. I didn’t mind. I would just buy more.
He separated my legs then leaned far over me. Then he placed my legs over his shoulders as he slid himself inside me. “I have to break you in again.”
I felt him move deep inside me and stretch me wide. He was big, but I loved his size. I didn’t think I could handle it, but clearly I could. I bit my lip as he moved into me harder than he normally did.
“You better not pull another fucking stunt like that,” he said in between breaths.
“I won’t,” I said with a moan.
“And if I catch that fucker anywhere near you, I swear to god, Sadie. I’ll fucking kill him.”
I grabbed his ass and pulled him further into me. He reached all the way to my cervix and it felt amazing. As soon as he was inside me, I felt the orgasm start. I was addicted to the sex we had. I could never be with someone else after him. “Ethan, I’m yours.”
“Yeah. All mine.”
“I’ve always been.”
He bit his lip as he moved into me. “I’m glad we got that straightened out.”
“Yeah.”
“And you better not run from me like that again, Sadie.”
“I won’t.”
“Promise me.”
“I promise.”
He pounded into me and I felt the orgasm circulate. I dug my nails i
nto his ass as the feel of his cock made me explode. “Ethan.”
“Baby.”
“Ethan, god. You always feel so good.”
“I know, baby. You feel the same way.”
After my moment was finished, he pounded into me faster than he ever had. My whole body shook with the force of his pumps. It felt good, but it started to hurt. It was too fast. “Uh—Ethan—uh.”
He immediately stopped. “Baby, are you okay?”
“That was too hard.”
His eyes widened in fear. “God, I’m sorry.” He pulled my legs down then pulled out of me. “I’m so sorry.” He kissed my lips then my forehead. “Are you okay?”
“I’m okay. I’m just not—ready for that level.”
He nodded. “It won’t happen again.” He looked like he was on the verge of tears.
“Ethan, it’s okay. I’ll get there eventually.”
He pulled away and lied down beside me.
“What are you doing?”
“Holding you.”
“Finish.”
“Aren’t you in pain?”
“No. It just hurt in the moment.”
“It’s okay, Sadie.”
“Babe, you’ve waited a week. I want you to get off.”
“Hurting you makes me feel sick.”
I crawled on top of him then inserted himself within me. He didn’t fight it and just closed his eyes. “Now you know you aren’t hurting me.” I moved on top of him and made his breaths come out deep and shallow. I didn’t ride him at a fast pace because I was afraid of feeling the pain again, but Ethan looked like he was enjoying it anyway. He grabbed my hips and thrust inside me gently.
“I can finally come inside you?”
I nodded.
“You’ve been taking it?”
“It’s a patch. I don’t have to take it.”
He leaned his head back. “Good.” He sat up and pressed his face against mine. “I want you to look at me when I come inside you.”
I moaned.
He moved below me, stretching me with every thrust. “Sadie.”
“Ethan.”
“I’m about to come.” He stared into my eyes, making me feel like I was the only thing that mattered in the world. “I want you to know how much I care about you, Sadie. I will never hurt you, betray you, or lie to you. I promise.”
“I couldn’t go on if you did.”
“You don’t have to worry about that.” He pressed his forehead against mine.
“Ethan.”
He bit his lip as he thrust into me one more time. His eyes never left mine as he released himself inside me. It was the hottest thing I’ve ever seen. I loved feeling him fill me. When he was done, he caught his breath.
“That felt amazing,” he said.
“I know.”
He lied down and pulled me to his chest. “Your phone off?”
“No.”
“Turn it off.”
“Why?”
“Because you’re mine tonight.”
I smiled. “Okay.” I crawled on his chest and lied on top of him. We said nothing for a long time. His hands glided through my hair and down my back. The feel of his hands made me relax. I had been in so much pain that week. I was so relieved that I was wrong about Ethan. The knowledge that he was already married completely shattered me. I was so glad to be wrong.
The sound of paws scratching the door could be heard.
Ethan gently rolled me off then opened the door. Koku pawed his legs and Ethan picked him up. He petted him for a while and my dog licked his face. It was so cute. Ethan left my bedroom and returned with a bone. He gave it to Koku and put him on the bed. Koku gnawed it happily.
Ethan smiled at me. “I have to fatten him up again.”
I reached my arms to him and pulled him to me.
“What do you want to do this evening?”
“I want to stay in bed.”
“That works for me.”
I kissed his chest then pressed my face next to his. I enjoyed feeling his skin next to mine.
He stared at my body, gliding his hands down my stomach and to my thighs. “Baby, you haven’t been eating.”
“I didn’t have an appetite.”
His eyes lost their light. “Well, now I’m going to fatten you up too.”
“I’m fine.”
“Clearly not. I’m so sorry that I hurt you.”
“It wasn’t your fault, Ethan.”
“I should have told you beforehand.”
“I should have trusted you.”
He shook his head. “I know how it looked. I understand why you jumped to that conclusion.”
“I still don’t understand why you hid it from me. I think you’re admirable and heroic. I may have slept with you sooner.”
“Well, I’m going to be supporting them for a very long time. She just can’t make enough money to pay the bills and hire help at the same time. Getting a reliable sitter is really expensive in the city. She would have to make as much as I do just afford all of that. It’s just easier if we wait until the kids start preschool. That way they’ll be gone during the day and she can work.”
“I still don’t understand.”
“Well, I won’t have much money to contribute to a marriage and a family for a year or two. As much as I want to start my own life, I can’t desert my sister and her kids. I would never want to.”
“I think it’s the right thing to do.”
He said nothing.
“How long ago did this happen?”
“Three years ago.”
“I’m so sorry about your loss.”
He nodded. “Tom was a good guy.”
“What happened?”
“We were out one night and Tom wanted to turn in early. Instead of walking with him like I should have, I stayed around to pick up some bimbo. As he was walking alone, he was mugged. When he resisted, the mugger stabbed him. He bled out and died. It wouldn’t have happened if I was there like I should have been.”
I felt the tears bubble under my eyes. “I’m so sorry.”
“We never caught the guy.”
I said nothing.
“How’s she doing?”
He shrugged. “She’s okay. She’s strong for the kids and acts like she’s happy. I hear her cry at night sometimes.”
“I don’t blame her. That’s so hard.”
“Yeah.”
“She can’t get a job?”
“She can but it will have to wait until the kids are in school. It’s pointless for her to work just to have a stranger take care of her kids. I wouldn’t want that and we both agreed on it. After the kids start school, I’ll help her find a job and get her back on her feet.”
I smiled when I listened to him, knowing how much he loved them.
“And living together is easier. When I get home from work, I take the kids to the park or out for ice cream so she has some alone time to read or take a nap. She loves being with them, but I know she gets overwhelmed sometimes. Having kids is definitely a two person gig. They are just so young that they need the attention. We both look forward to them starting school so they’ll be gone most of the day, playing with other kids.”
“That’s so sweet.”
“Yeah. I wouldn’t have it any other way.”
“She doesn’t have help from anyone else?”
“No. My parents are dead and Tom’s parents live on the west coast. They don’t have money to help out.”
“Oh? I’m so sorry, Ethan.”
“It’s okay. It happened a long time ago.”
I wanted to know what happened but I decided to drop it.
“And my brothers don’t make enough money to help out. They have their own lives. Plus, Elisa doesn’t want their help. She and I have always been closer than my other siblings since we’re twins. And after what happened, knowing I should have been there with Tom, it’s my responsibility to take care of her. I’m the only person she has.”
“It isn
’t your fault,” I whispered.
“Yes it is.”
“No.”
“Drop it.”
I hugged him to my chest. “You’re amazing.”
“I try.”
“I’m sorry I jumped to conclusions.”
He kissed my forehead. “Don’t worry about it, baby.”
“Tell me about your niece and nephew.”
He smiled. His eyes lit up when he thought about them. “Becky is four. She’s a little brat but she’s adorable as hell. Tommy is shy but he has a good heart. I have high hopes for both of them.”
“They sound amazing.”
“Yeah. I like them—sometimes.”
I nudged his shoulder. “You love them.”
“Too much.”
I wanted to meet them but I didn’t want to rush him into anything. He already met my dad so I thought he would reciprocate.
He caught my look. “You still want to come over for dinner tomorrow?”
“Uh, if it’s too soon, that’s fine.”
He raised an eyebrow. “I already invited you over before this whole fiasco. I want you to meet my family, Sadie.”
I felt my heart race. “Are you sure?”
“Definitely. I know they’ll like you.”
“Even your sister?”
“She’ll definitely like you.”
“How can you be sure?”
“I’ve never introduced her to a girl before. She’ll understand how important you are to me by that fact alone. You could be a complete bitch and she would still give you a chance.”
I was touched by his words. “I would be your first?”
He rubbed his nose against mine. “Yeah.”
“I—I don’t know what to say.”
“Say yes.”
“Okay.”
“And I’ll cook for you.”
“Should I bring something?”
“No. I’m taking care of you.”
“Okay.”
He continued to run his fingers down my arm, making my hair stand up. He grabbed my leg, wrapping it around his waist. We were snuggled close to each other. I could feel his heart race in his chest as he pressed against me.