“I was an orphan too. A ward of the state. I know what it’s like. My parents died in a fire when I was very young. That’s why I became a firefighter.”
My mouth opens and I want to say, “I’m so sorry,” but the words don’t come out. Now I feel absolutely terrible inside for asking.
“I know what foster homes are like. And I don’t want any child to ever have to know what that’s like.”
I feel the tears roll down my cheeks and I want to just get up and hug him right now but I feel guilty for asking him. Guilty for bringing this all up in the first place. This is supposed to be a happy day. The day before I become an adult. A day before my birthday. And I just ruined it. The tears come harder and I can’t take it anymore.
I jump out of my chair and run to him. I don’t know if I’m doing it for him or for me or for both of us.
I throw myself into his arms, curl up in a little ball and feel that protection that only his touch can provide me.
I just let him hold me there like that until I don’t remember any more.
I let it all out without a word from him or from me. And once my catharsis is complete my body shuts down and goes to sleep…right there in his arms where I know I belong.
Chapter Seven
Finley
4th of July
I wake to the sound of the clock striking midnight.
My birthday. My independence day.
I open my eyes and turn back to look at him.
He’s running his hands through my hair and looking down at me. I don’t know if he even slept at all. He certainly didn’t move. He just held me there and let me feel safe and protected in his arms.
“Hey,” I muster.
“Hey,” he says and gives me a gentle smile.
I can’t deny what’s happening. I can’t deny how perfect it feels to sleep like that in his arms. I’ve never slept so well in my life. And I wasn’t even trying to sleep.
He always said this was a big day for me and now here we were…my birthday being official now for a full half minute. I’d looked forward to it for so long and now it was here and I just wish…it wasn’t. At least in terms of me moving out…if I wanted. But there was something good about turning eighteen. I could make my own choices, whatever those choices might be. I was officially an adult.
“There was something on my mind while I was sleeping,” I say.
“Okay.”
“You said, ‘But if I’m honest with myself, the reason I wanted to be your guardian, at least at first, is because I knew what lay ahead for you.’”
“That’s right. I said that.”
“And you meant it.”
“Of course.”
“At first.”
“What do you mean?”
“You said ‘at first.’”
“Yes.”
“But what about now?”
He doesn’t reply. He just continues stroking my hair before I feel his other hand start to stroke my arm. His look alternates between intensifying and softening. It’s like an entire range of emotions are on display just through his eyes. It’s fascinating to watch, but I’m even more fascinated by his impending answer.
And like always he doesn’t let me down.
“Because I’m in love with you.”
Chapter Eight
Finn
Her body becomes completely still, but not mine.
I lean in bringing my face closer to hers and more importantly our lips.
I’ve kissed her forehead hundreds of times, if not thousands.
I kissed it when she left for school each morning.
I kissed it each night when she fell asleep to the bedtime stories I’d read to her.
I kissed it when she fell down and I’d tell her everything would be okay and her body would heal.
But this time I’m not kissing her forehead.
For the first time my lips aim lower and when they get closer to hers I can feel her breath on mine and know she must feel the same.
Her lips part slightly and it’s all the invitation I need.
I close the last of the distance and suddenly I feel the softness and plumpness of her lips on mine, the sweetness of her kiss, and everything that we have together completely changes. Forever.
She twists her body back more so our faces can line up better.
I slide my hand in underneath the side of her head and tilt her back towards me.
But I want more. So much more.
And from the hunger in her kiss so does she.
I stand up, cradling her in my arms.
I carry her towards her room. Another thing I’ve done hundreds of times before.
When she fell asleep on the couch to her favorite Disney movies.
When I let her stay up past her bedtime to watch her favorite shows.
And when she passed out at her desk putting her all into her homework and completely winning my admiration for her dedication to becoming the best student she could be.
But at just a few minutes after midnight tonight I don’t stop at her door, turning right and entering her room where I’ve tucked her in so many times before.
I continue forward to my room. A room she’s never entered…until now.
And once she enters it she’s never coming out…at least in terms of where she’ll spend the night.
I want her in my bed. I need her in my bed. Not just tonight, but forever.
And when I lay her down gently on the sheets she quickly reaches up both hands to my face, pulling my face back to hers.
I want to feel her lips on mine but equally as much I want to feel her skin on mine…together as we twist and turn on the bed, our bodies getting lost in the sheets and a certain part of my body getting lost inside.
A part which is so hard right now I absolutely have to get out of these clothes…and inside her.
To own her. To make her mine.
Chapter Nine
Finley
I’m not sure who’s out of their clothes faster, him or me.
But one thing is very, very slow. The way his eyes linger across my body. How his gaze matches mine eye-to-eye but then slowly drifts down and around exploring my body like it’s a maze and he wants to get lost in every direction.
But when I look at him I only see one direction. Up.
As in the direction his cock is pointing and the direction my life is going. With him by my side I know I can conquer all.
But right now I don’t just want him by my side. I also want him on me and in me. Inside my body like he’s already inside my soul.
And on top of me is where he immediately positions himself.
But like a true lover he’s not in a rush. He kisses me again, taking me back to blissful perfection.
And his kisses don’t just start and stop at my lips.
They continue down my neck, lingering behind my ear before slowly, oh so slowly, making their way to my collarbone where he drags his lips back and forth before gently nibbling on my shoulder.
I never would have even thought of such a thing, but it makes complete sense. He wants all of me in every way imaginable, and he has a big imagination…this I know.
A quick flashback hits me when he used to tell me bedtime stories from books, until I caught him just making up the stories all on his own. I didn’t get it at first. His stories seemed so vivid and real, but didn’t always match the cover of the book which he had in front of him. I’d checked one day after only to learn he was making it all up as he went along. Adding things that he knew I liked. Including more puppies, and more jumping rope, and more babies and things that always made me smile.
I never told him I found out and tonight I’ll find out just how far that imagination of his extends…but in a completely different kind of way.
A grown up way.
And now I’m officially a grown up.
And I like how this all just happened so organically. It’s not like he was counting down the days until my eighteenth birthday t
o “try something.”
There was a natural build up that happened between two people.
Part based on respect. Part based on fear of loss. And all based on mutual admiration, trust, and needing nothing more in life than each other.
And I needed him now to complete me.
His lips continued down across my breasts. Gentle kisses with a strong impact. I could feel my body shiver and goose bumps come and go, but I wasn’t cold. Quite the contrary. I was so hot inside and so hot for him.
And when his mouth reached my pussy and he kissed me there I thought I’d died and gone to heaven.
The way he kissed my lips so gently before moving his tongue inside me, up and down, in figure eights and then finding spots I’d only read about but never experienced in my own right.
And with a flick of the tongue he turned my world upside down, flipping everything on its head, and my head was completely lost in the clouds as I felt a wave of emotion rush from inside me and through my body before something else rushed out of me.
But I didn’t feel it run down my leg or anything like that, signifying he was accepting all of me. Making me come and when I did taking it in his mouth and inside his body.
But it was just a taste, and now I needed more.
“I want to feel you inside me,” I say.
His lips come off my pussy as my orgasm subsides and he mounts me all over again, but this time he doesn’t kiss me first.
He lines his cock up to my entrance and I know it’s time to leave my formative years behind and become a woman, in at least this one particular way.
“Once I’m inside you there’s no going back,” he says. “I never wanted another and these last few weeks I’ve come to realize why. All I ever needed was you. And once I do have you I can’t not have you. Do you understand me?”
“Yes,” I say.
“Once I’m inside you are mine. Tonight. Tomorrow. Forever. And not only are you mine, but I’m yours…as I’ve always been. This is just in a different way…a much more serious way, but we were always each others…we just didn’t know it and it was much different then. But this is something special. Something that we’ll always have, like we’ll always have each other.”
“I want that.”
“And I want you. I need you. And if you’re ready now I’ll have you and you’ll have me.”
“I’m ready,” I say.
And just as he’s always respected me in every way he respects me again in this most intimate of moments. I know it’s taking everything he’s got to not just slide inside me, but he would never do that. Not without my approval, blessing, and desire. And desire is exactly what fills his eyes and is making that cock of his twitch uncontrollably at my opening.
But the twitching subsides when he gently slides the head inside me and begins to fill me.
I quickly realize why he’s been so gentle through this entire process. There are many reasons, but one very big one now. Very, very big as in him. He’s much too big for me but the slight tinge of pain feels wonderful. I’m not one for pain at all, but this is different…indescribable…unmatched.
His eyes are locked on mine as he reads my expressions, slowly pulling back to the point where he’s almost out, but not.
He doesn’t come all the way out, instead keeping our two bodies connected as one.
“You okay?”
“Yes,” I say. “Let’s continue…slowly.”
And oh so slowly he re-enters me bringing back that pleasure mixed with a slight feeling of pain, but less than last time.
He pulls back again before reentering me.
A few slow entries and near exits later and the pain is a thing of the past.
I feel my eyes close and I reach for the sheets, balling them up in my hands before releasing them and grabbing his wrists which support his hands which are now flat on the bed next to me.
He’s leaning over me, so much bigger, wider and thicker than me.
But tonight he’s a gentle giant, making this all about me and my comfort.
And I’m completely comfortable whenever he’s near.
But his dominant position over me makes me feel more primal, more feminine, and more beautiful in contrast to his dominance.
But there is no dominance this first time, only mutual pleasure and admiration.
I admire the way he’s holding back because something tells me, even through my inexperience, that he’d want to finish inside me immediately if he had his wish.
But not finish inside me to complete a primal need, at least not the one of the flesh. As crazy as it sounds I think he wants to fill me so we can have a child together.
To bring a life of our own here to join us.
Just the thought of it heightens the feeling of him between my legs and I feel a second climax approach and quickly become a reality.
But this time I’m not alone.
My muscles tighten as I feel his gift enter me and I swear he’s filling me it’s so powerful and unstoppable. It’s unlike anything I could have imagined or ever dreamed of.
And it’s completely perfect.
Just like my first time.
I couldn’t have asked for more. And wouldn’t have ever asked for it from anyone else.
And once my body gets used to his size I can’t wait to experience my second, and third, and…
But first I just want this. To cuddle in his arms as I feel his chest heave as he lies with me.
In his arms. That’s where I’ve always belonged. And now I’m here and I’m not going anywhere…ever.
Chapter Ten
Finley
“I had a dream last night,” I say the next morning as we lay in bed together.
“What about?”
“Well, please don’t take this the wrong way, but you do know I’ve been planning on moving out today.”
“I do know you had been planning on that,” he says as he winks as we lay side by side facing each other.
“Well…I did move out in my dream.”
“That sounds more like a nightmare than a dream to me,” he says.
I reach out and playfully twist his nipple. He does the same to me, not hard of course.
What an incredibly fun way to wake up. Starting the day with foreplay and fun and just general positivity like this.
And of course with him by my side. That’s what really matters.
“What happened then?” he asks.
“I was in bed my first night, but I couldn’t fall asleep.”
“Were you scared to be alone?”
“Not to be alone…to be without you.”
He runs his hand through my hair.
“And then my phone rings.”
“Same dream?”
“Same one. So the phone rings and it’s you. You tell me you can’t sleep either. And then you say, ‘What are we doing. Come home where you belong.’ And you come over and pick me up.”
“This dream is sounding a lot better to me now.”
I smile.
“So the next morning we go back over to get my things and the landlord is yelling saying I’m going to lose my deposit and this and that. But you’re very calm and you walk up to him and say, ‘It’s not always about what you lose. It’s about what you gain in the process.’ And he looks at you strangely like he just doesn’t get it and then we drive off and I’m officially back here.”
“I like your dreams. Maybe we could turn them into romantic movies.”
“Do you consider yourself romantic?” I ask.
“I never did…until you.”
“Awww,” I say and pull myself closer to him. “And how romantic are you right now?”
“You bring it out in me. What can I say.”
“Tell me you love me.”
“I love you.”
“That was fast.”
“It was fast because my plan this morning wasn’t to tell you I love you.”
I push myself back off his chest. I assume he’s joking around
but I don’t get it. “What do you mean?”
“I wasn’t planning on telling you, because I was planning on…” He arm twists back and his body rotates away from me as he does something on the other side of the bed. His arm and body rotate back and he finishes his sentence. “…showing you.”
He’s holding a little black box and my first thought is what in the world could be inside.
But when he opens it I realize just how unprepared I was, and how prepared, as always, he is.
“Oh my…” I say, my hands coming up to my face.
“It was my grandmother’s,” he says.
“It’s beautiful. But I thought you said…”
“I did say that and I am. I was contacted recently as she passed away. Apparently doing one of those intensive DNA tests where you learn about your ancestors are way more accurate than I expected. Anyways she had done one too and apparently she had some money in her life. She used part of it to hire a private investigator and he tracked me down. I thought it was a joke at first when he showed up.”
“You’re kidding?”
“I’m not. It’s stranger than fiction, I know. But when I found out that she lived in Europe where there were no records and my mother never spoke with her it made more sense.”
“No records in Europe?”
“She was originally from Eastern Germany and they either didn’t have records or they were destroyed. She was very old so it actually kind of makes sense.”
“Germany?”
“Yeah. I did some research after and found over forty percent of Americans can track some part of their heritage back to Germany.”
“Really?”
“Yeah. It surprised me too. Anyways, I was happy to find this out but was disappointed that I never got to meet her while she was alive. I got in touch with her estate and was able to secure this ring. It was the one and only thing I asked for. I wanted it because it symbolized the life she gave me. I didn’t ever think I’d have a life with someone, at first at least, but now I absolutely know that I will and I know exactly who that someone will be and she ought to have it more than anyone else in this world. That is…assuming she wants to have it. Or should I cut to the chase more accurately and do this right.” He quickly clears his throat and takes my hand in his. “Finley, we’ve been connected for a long, long time. And it’s my hope that we won’t just be connected for a long time, but forever. And the best way for us to continue that connection is to show the world by connecting this ring to your finger and soon enough you’ll do the same for me. And as nice as the ring is it’s main importance is to symbolize what we have for each other. And in our case it symbolizes what we’ve had and what we will have and also in some way what I missed out on in my life. Well, I never want to miss anything when it comes to you. And if you accept this ring I’ll never have to. And that’s what I want in life more than anything…just simply you. You and only you. Will you marry me?”
A Man Who Knows What He Wants Box Set 5 Page 18