by Blair Grey
I shook my head. “Got shit that I need to do tomorrow,” I lied. Really, I just had enough of the kid already.
Grant’s face fell. “Of course,” he said, and I remembered what he had said before about feeling like he was an outcast in the MC. Better remind him that he’d see me soon enough before he decided to call it quits with Red Eyes and went to Ray to tell him so.
“I’ll see you at the meeting on Monday,” I told him. That would also give me until Monday to avoid his company. Of course, I was sure Ray would have some other project he wanted us to do together. Ugh.
“Yeah, see you Monday,” Grant said, and I could tell that he wanted to say something else. But if it was another invitation, he didn’t have the balls to actually ask. I had to fight the urge to roll my eyes again. God, it was too much like babysitting.
I gave him an aborted wave and started for home, glancing back over my shoulder when I was halfway down the block because I was honestly worried that he might have thought of something else to ask and decided to follow me. But fortunately, he was nowhere to be seen, and I breathed a sigh of relief.
I just wanted to go home, have another few drinks in the privacy of my house, and forget that this evening had ever happened. Forget that this year had ever happened.
Maybe drinking alone was desperate, but so was dragging various members of the MC out for drinks in the hopes that I could forget that Landon no longer lived with me in the house that we had bought together here in Las Cruces. I vowed to keep to myself from now on, even if Ray begged me to take Grant out again.
6
Mia
Candice laughed when she saw where I was looking. “What, were you hoping Braxton would stick around and keep you company for the night?” she asked.
I blinked over at her, not realizing that she snuck up behind me. But her side of the bar was pretty empty too. One of those lulls. Hopefully, it was a sign that we were slowing down for the night, that things would be easy from here on out. I didn’t like the knowing grin that she was giving me, though.
“What?” I asked innocently. “I was just making sure they didn’t need refills on their drinks.”
“Sure,” Candice said, and I could tell that she wasn’t buying it. She shrugged. “Come on; I can tell that you like Braxton. And that you like him as more than just a friend.”
I rolled my eyes. “You’re being ridiculous,” I said, inwardly wondering what I had done to give it away. But then again, Candice knew me better than anyone. And she’d owned a bar long enough to be pretty good at reading relationships between people.
Candice shrugged. “I’m just saying; you could do worse than him for a boyfriend. I know he’s in the motorcycle club, but I think he’s a pretty good guy. And we all know that Red Eyes isn’t up to anything too terrible.”
As though that was the only problem with him. I shook my head. “I’m not getting into a relationship anytime soon,” I told her. And that was the truth.
Just as I said that, Darren came striding through the door to the bar, and I fought not to groan. Speak of the devil. Or think of the devil at least.
His eyes flicked over the bar like he wasn’t actively looking for me, and then he went over to a table in the corner and took a seat. My hands clenched into fists just looking at him.
“You want me to get him out of here?” Candice asked sympathetically.
“I’ll handle it,” I said shortly.
“Are you sure?” Candice asked.
“I’m not scared of him,” I repeated my earlier sentiment. “And anyway, if you deal with it, he’s just going to keep coming back. You know that. Better that I let him know, once and for all, that I’m not interested.” I rolled my eyes. “As though I haven’t already done that a thousand times.”
Candice looked like she wanted to argue, but a couple more people sat down at the bar, and she gave me one final look before moving to serve them. I took a deep breath and then headed over to Darren’s table. I wasn’t scared of him, and I knew that she had my back if he tried anything. I just wished I could make him disappear from the face of the earth at the snap of my fingers.
I didn’t bother with pleasantries when I got over to Darren’s table. Instead, I folded my arms across my chest. “What the hell are you doing here?” I asked him, keeping my tone level.
Darren raised an eyebrow at him, his lips drawn up into a shit-eating smirk. “Is that any way to greet a friend?” he asked. Before I could argue about that, he continued, “I’m just here for a drink. That’s what people generally do in a bar, isn’t it?”
“I’m not stupid,” I said, narrowing my own eyes at him. “I know you’re here to keep tabs on me. To make sure I’m not with someone else. But it’s none of your business. I’m not interested in you anymore, and you know that.”
Darren laughed, “I know your feelings for me didn’t just vanish.”
I made a face. “Darren, whatever we had, it’s over,” I insisted. “We had our time, but it’s done now. You have to get over it. Leave me alone.”
This time, it was Darren’s eyes that narrowed. He leaned closer to me, and I imagined I could smell the scent of alcohol on him even over the scent of the bar. Of course, he wasn’t really that drunk, but I remembered how things had gone with him. What a fucking waste of space.
“It’s over when I say it’s over,” Darren said in a low voice, like some villain from a B movie.
I rolled my eyes, not feeling any sort of fear at that comment. “Keep thinking that,” I told him, already turning to walk away. I wasn’t going to get him a drink. He didn’t need another, and the last thing I needed was for him to think that he was welcome here. No, let him get no service. We’d see how long before he quit coming in here. Or until he got frustrated enough to try something.
The bouncers would throw him out before he ever laid a finger on me, and then I would never have to deal with him here again.
I was mainly just embarrassed by all of this. I didn’t want to be the kind of person who caused drama at work because of poor choices she made in her personal life. And Darren had been the poorest choice of them all. Of course, things had started out well enough with him, but they had rapidly spiraled out of control. Now, I was left putting my life back together and pretending that he had never existed.
Which would have been a hell of a lot easier to do if he would quit bothering me like this.
I wondered momentarily what he would have done if Braxton had still been in here when he arrived. Candice had said that it looked like I might want something more than friendship from the Red Eyes member. And even though the last thing I wanted was drama, even though the last thing I wanted was to have two guys fighting over me at my workplace, I couldn’t help picturing the fight.
Braxton would win for sure. Darren was decently strong, but he didn’t have the fighting experience that I was sure Braxton had. And he didn’t have quite the bulk of muscles either. Braxton could take him easily. But it was probably a good thing that Braxton and Grant had left early. For everyone’s sakes, but especially for mine. I was pretty sure Candice would have to fire me if two goons showed up at Sunshine to fight over me.
“You okay?” Candice asked as I resumed my place behind the bar.
I watched as Darren headed out the door as quickly as he had come. Good, so he got the message. As long as we didn’t serve him, he wouldn’t stay here for long.
I rolled my eyes. “Yeah, I’m fine,” I told Candice. “What a prick.”
“I know you said that he’s not a problem, but I think you need to be careful around him,” Candice observed.
“I doubt he’s going to attack me,” I said, shaking my head. “And he’s definitely not going to come after the bar or anything else. If anything, he’s going to try to get into a fight with my next boyfriend. But since I don’t plan on having one anytime soon, I think we’re good there. He’ll get bored of me soon enough.”
“I don’t know,” Candice said, looking sourly toward the do
ors. “He seems kind of fixated on you. Kind of crazy actually.”
I snorted. “Yeah, well, he’s a drunken waste of space,” I said dismissively. “There’s nothing to worry about with him. I’m not going to let him control my life, that’s for sure.”
“Okay,” Candice said, shrugging. “You know him better than I do of course. But seriously, if you want to ban him from even coming in here, let me know.” She paused. “You might want to think about getting a restraining order against him or something, though.”
“If he really is crazy, isn’t that just going to make him even angrier?” I asked.
“It might,” Candice said. “But at least you could do something about it if he bothered you.”
I shrugged. “Did you see the way that just went?” I asked, gesturing toward the empty table. “I barely had to say anything, and he already got up and left. It’s that easy. Once he doesn’t get the attention he wants, he’ll stop.”
“All right,” Candice said, shrugging.
I smiled at her and gave her a quick hug. “Thanks for looking out for me,” I told her seriously. That was part of why I loved working here. Candice wasn’t like just any other boss. She really wanted to make sure that we were all okay. She wanted the best for me. It was why I liked working for her.
But I just wished Darren would leave me alone without having to go to ridiculous measures like getting a restraining order against him. And to be honest, I hadn’t seen him much lately. He seemed to be getting the idea that I didn’t want anything to do with him. It was only a matter of time before he quit bothering me entirely, I was sure of it.
So I got back to work, putting him totally out of my mind.
7
Braxton
I’d been restless since I got back from Sarasota, but it was nothing compared to how I felt on Saturday night. It was Saturday night. I couldn’t remember the last time I had stayed at home on a Saturday night. Landon and I always went for at least one beer at the club. And usually, we made it the best night of the week. But Landon was in Florida now, and I didn’t have anyone to go out with.
Well, that wasn’t exactly the truth. I was sure that Grant would like nothing more than to go out for drinks with me. But I didn’t want to babysit him for the whole night, and he definitely wasn’t the kind of wingman that I was looking for.
I was sure that if I just went out to the club, I would find other people I knew, but I hated the idea of showing up anywhere on my own. That would look appallingly desperate. No, if I wanted to head to a club tonight, I needed to start at a bar, find some sexy arm-candy to go with me to the club, and then go. But without a wingman, that meant I was going to have an especially difficult time since the kinds of girls who were willing to go out to clubs were the kinds of girls who got together with their girlfriends to do it. I wasn’t going to be able to convince one girl to come alone with me to the club, and I doubted I’d be able to get her to drag all her friends along, either, unless her friends were also looking at hookups for the night.
It was terrible, and I couldn’t help feeling frustrated.
I started drinking early, trying to forget how disgusting it was that I was drinking on my own again that week. Was this how it was going to be from now on? I definitely hoped not. But I didn’t know how to fix things, short of finding myself a woman as well.
I snorted. That would be the day. I had no desire to start a relationship with someone, and definitely not right now. I didn’t want my feelings getting tangled up in someone else’s life, and anyway, I didn’t want to feel like I needed someone else. I could do just fine on my own. I just had to get used to this, that was all. Just because Landon had a girlfriend, it didn’t mean I needed one too. We didn’t have to do everything at the same time in our lives just because we always had before, from the time of our births.
After deliberating for a while, I headed out to Sunshine. No point in sitting home alone. Even if I didn’t end up at the club that night, maybe I could find someone to take home for a quick fuck at least. I could do with a fuck. Grant had totally cramped my style last night.
I sat at a table by myself, eyeing the rest of the people at the bar. This place was never too busy on Saturday nights, not like Thursdays and Fridays. Despite the name, it was a bit of a dive, and it just wasn’t the kind of place most people headed to on a Saturday night.
“Hey, what can I get for you?” Mia asked almost immediately after I was seated. She tucked a long lock of her hair behind her ear, and I suddenly wondered what she looked like with her hair out of its ponytail and spilling across her shoulders. Was it long enough to cover those pretty breasts of hers? I didn’t know. But I sort of wanted to find out.
Again, I knew that she’d never go for me, though. I must just not be her type.
I shook my head and shrugged. “I guess just a beer.”
“Sure thing,” Mia said, not bothering to ask what type I wanted. I had been in here enough over the years that she knew what I liked, and I trusted her not to dick around with me.
I looked out around the bar again as I waited for her to get back to me with my drink. I didn’t see anyone else sitting by themselves, not even at the bar. Everyone else seemed to have friends there with them. I was the only loser who was here alone.
But before I could get too depressed, Mia was back with my beer. Not only that, but she dropped into a seat across from me.
“Ugh, I can’t wait until this shift is over,” she said, shaking her head. “Tina’s out of town, and even with the rest of us all pulling extra shifts, this week has just felt extra long.”
“Yeah, you look pretty tired,” I told her automatically, noticing the bags under her eyes. I had wondered why she was sitting with me—if she thought that I was desperate for company or something. But this was probably just a convenient excuse for her to take a break and get off her feet for a second. Besides, it wasn’t like they were too busy in there. She probably didn’t have anything better to do.
And I liked her company. I didn’t feel like sending her away, or at least, not yet.
She made a face at me. “I look tired?” she asked. “Are you saying I look like shit?”
“You could never look like shit.” Again, it was an automatic thing to say. But I noticed the way she grinned, as though I had given her some great compliment. I fought the urge to roll my eyes. She had to know that she was attractive. It’s not like I was telling her anything new.
“How’s your week been?” she asked, propping her cheek against her hand.
I shrugged and took a sip of my beer. “Long,” I finally admitted.
“Bet you’re missing your brother, huh?” Mia asked.
I suddenly wondered if maybe she had had some sort of feelings for Landon. That would make a ton of sense. There had to be a reason why she never seemed too interested in me. Maybe she was too busy making eyes at my brother.
I didn’t really want to talk to her about Landon, but still, I also didn’t want to send her away. This was my first real interaction of the day unless you counted random words with the grocery store cashier earlier that afternoon. So I frowned, trying to explain how I was feeling.
It wasn’t that I missed Landon. It was something much more profound than that. It was as though there was a part of me that was still there in Florida as well. As though something had been taken from me. I sighed. “I guess the main thing is figuring out new routines,” I said to Mia, not wanting to be one of those drunks who laid out all their problems on their bartender. “I just don’t have anyone to hang out with anymore.”
Mia laughed and shook her head. “That’s it?” she asked. “You just miss having someone to hang out with? You’re terrible.”
I laughed, surprised by her words. “Yeah, I guess that’s it,” I said, feeling a bit of my confidence return. “Who needs that guy anyway? It just sucks that he was pretty much forced to hang out with me all my life. I don’t have that same relationship with anyone else.”
Mia snicke
red. “Well, I guess I’m not being forced to hang out with you, but I’d hang out with you if you wanted. You know, just to have someone to fill the void so that you’re not drinking alone.”
Something in the way that she said it let me know that she saw right through me. That she knew just how much of my life had revolved around Landon and how hard it was going to be to fill those spaces. And I hated knowing that she saw me like that.
I straightened my shoulders, giving her a cool look. “I’m not looking for a replacement for him,” I told her haughtily, as though I didn’t need her company. But hello, I was at the bar alone on a Saturday night, and I couldn’t even begin to try to go after other women when I was here on my own, without a wingman. I needed her. No matter how embarrassing that was to admit.
Mia looked apologetic. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to say it that way. I know I couldn’t replace your brother.”
“I don’t need your sympathy,” I continued because I was sure that was what I could see in her eyes.
But Mia didn’t seem offended, and she still didn’t get up. Instead, she just shrugged right back at me, looking pointedly around at the empty chairs at my table. “You don’t need my sympathy?” she echoed. “To be honest, it kind of looks like you do.”
There wasn’t anything mean in the way that she said it, though. Like she had said, she was just being honest. And I appreciated that. Landon was the only guy who had ever been brutally honest with me, whether he was telling me to quit being an idiot and explaining why one of my stupid plans wouldn’t work or otherwise.
That prompted me to say what I said next: “I’m thinking of going for a ride tomorrow on my bike,” I said. “You want to come with me?”
Mia raised an eyebrow at me. “Where are you planning on going?” she asked like she was really thinking about it.
I shrugged a shoulder. “I don’t know, just around,” I said. “The weather should be nice, though.”