by Anna B. Doe
“It’s not that hard, look…” Hayden leans in and starts explaining.
I knew it. He’ll be perfect.
NOW
I’m startled awake on a gasp. Biting into my lip, my eyes dart toward the other side of the room where Yasmin is still sleeping soundly. Thank God. I don’t want her to know about my nightmares. I don’t want anybody to know about them. It would raise too many questions I’m not ready to answer.
Sighing quietly, I run my hand over my face. A sheer layer of sweat coats my skin making me feel all sticky and gross.
Laying back down, I take my phone off the nightstand to check for the time. It’s barely past five. Not like that’s anything new. Insomnia and overall lack of sleep have been my constant companions for years, just like the nightmares… only this one, this one is new.
A shiver runs through my body. I pull the cover tightly around me, but it doesn’t help chase away the chill from my bones.
The dreams that haunt me are about the accident and my guilt over what has happened. These new ones, however, are different. And they have nothing to do with what happened three years ago and everything to do with the second biggest regret of my life.
Knowing there is no sense in even attempting to sleep, I slowly get up. Might as well use the crack of dawn to get the bathroom all to myself.
I take my time in the shower, enjoying the extra hot water and good pressure. And solitude, can’t forget about that.
Trust me, there is nothing like living in a dorm full of girls to put a perspective on the way one thinks. You seriously learn how to enjoy and appreciate the little things in life.
When I return back to the room, Yasmin is sitting straight in the bed, rubbing at her tired eyes.
“Already up?” she asks me, eyeing me curiously.
“Figured I might get an early start. Grab some coffee before I head out for the torture.”
“Torture?”
“Physical therapy,” I explain, figuring there isn’t much sense in hiding it. Not from her. “I have my first appointment today.”
“Oh.” She blinks, taking me in.
We’ve been living together for a few weeks now and she still hasn’t seen me in anything that shows off my skin. Her curious gaze makes me feel uncomfortable. I didn’t want anybody’s pity, especially not when I’m faced with that person every single day. That’s why I avoid mentioning stuff like PT and the accident. People look at you differently when they know your weaknesses.
“Yup.” I grab my backpack and put the books I’ll need later along with a change of clothes. “I’m gonna head out. See you later?”
“Sure.” Yasmin nods, getting up to start with her day. “Good luck with the PT.”
“Thanks,” I throw over my shoulder as I head out.
It’s mid-September, and there is a slight chill in the air signaling autumn is here. Since I lived all my life in California, I wasn’t really used to seeing seasons change, so it’ll definitely take some getting used to. Gooseflesh rises on my skin underneath my light sweater, crisp morning air making my whole body shudder.
The last few weeks have been a blur. In a way college was the same as high school, but there was a level of competitiveness I wasn’t used to. Then again, maybe it was just the fact that this is Blairwood University, a college that produces the best of the best.
Either way, with classes in full swing I had to give it my best to stay atop of my schedule because I knew if I don’t there will be no way I’ll be able to catch up later on. And I only have four classes. I seriously didn’t understand how Yasmin could juggle six classes and a job.
I inhale deeply, the fresh air filling my lungs as I watch colorful leaves scatter around the campus. It’s… different, but still pretty.
Slowly, I walk toward Cup It Up. Except for an occasional jogger, the campus is blissfully quiet since it’s still early.
Today there is a guy standing behind the counter. He yawns loudly as he makes my order and as soon as I have the biggest cup of steaming coffee possible—pumpkin spice latte today—I head out to get to the campus clinic.
When I first decided to pick up with PT, I figured I’d be forced to go off campus to find a nearby hospital or a private clinic, but it turns out BWU has its own on-campus clinic since we have a big number of student-athletes.
Between moving and hot coffee, I’m not as cold as I was when I first got out, so I take my time walking across the campus. It’s not like I’m in a hurry to get there. I might know that I need to exercise, but that doesn’t mean I particularly want to do it.
If it’s to believe the map, the clinic should be somewhere between a science building and a hockey arena. I haven’t really done much sightseeing around the campus, so the map is the only thing I’ve got.
There is a little more life now. Classes should start soon, so people are probably going to grab a coffee or breakfast before they get stuck in the dusty classrooms.
Just when I think I’m lost, I see the sign for the clinic a few yards away. Sighing in relief, I hurry toward it. I don’t want to be late for my session, not when they squeezed me in, in the first place.
I wrap my hand around the handle, just as the door pushes open.
“Oh so—”
“No, it’s my…”
We look at each other, and I’m surprised to see a pair of light green eyes staring back at me.
Hayden’s friend from the other day.
He looks equally surprised as I am to find each other here. Smile that was on his lips only a moment ago, falls down, frown appearing between his brows.
Great, just what I need.
I’m not sure what his connection to Hayden is or how much he knows after everything that happened at the party the other night. He knows something, that’s for sure.
I think about ignoring him, but it’s not like I can just slip inside when he’s filling the doorway. Besides, he seemed nice. So instead I opt for a simple: “Hi.”
He scowls and snarls at me. “What are you doing here?”
I take a step back, surprised by his hostility. I didn’t expect him to react like that. What the hell? First Hayden and now this guy?
“I don’t see how that’s any of your business,” I snap back.
“First the party and now here? I’m not your ticket to get to Hades, honey. Might as well give up.”
What. The. Hell? I’m not sure if this is Hayden, or this guy has some fucked up idea in his head, but I’m not about to wait to find out.
“Not everything is about Hades, honey. Get that out of your head.” I try to get around him, hoping he’ll move if I do, but he stays put. Tilting my head back, I glare at him. “Could you be a darling and move out of my way?”
He looks me up and down, like he’s trying to figure me out. His face a hard mask as he mutters something quietly.
“What?” I’m so done with his annoying ass. If he has something to say, he might as well say it to my face.
“I said I get it.”
“Get what?” I narrow my eyes at him.
“How Hayden could have a thing for somebody like you.”
My mouth falls open. “Somebody like me? What does that even mean?”
What’s this guy’s problem? I saw him once and now he thinks he knows everything about me? Fuck that. Fuck him. I don’t need shit like this in my life.
“You know what? Don’t answer that. I don’t want to know.” This time I push harder against him, and he finally gets the memo and moves back, letting me pass.
Presumptuous idiot.
But I don’t get far enough because I can still hear his next words. “If you have one bone in you that’s decent, you’ll leave him alone.”
I freeze in my spot, my hands clenching by my sides in anger.
The silence stretches between us. I think he’ll say something, but he doesn’t. Instead I can hear the door close as he leaves.
Sighing, I force my body to relax, and I’m almost there when an older woman dres
sed in black sweats and shirt with a school logo walks into the lobby.
“Callie Stewart?”
“That’s me.” I wave my hand lamely like she can’t see me.
“Hi.” She comes closer, extending her hand to me. “I’m Dr. Snow, I’ll be working with you today, but before we start, I’ll need you to answer some questions for me.”
My nose crinkles at the idea of discussing my condition, but I also know the longer I stall, the longer it’ll take for this to be over. “Sure, let’s do this.”
Chapter Fifteen
CALLIE
“What happened to you?” Nix asks as soon as he sets his eyes on me.
Glaring at him, I sit in the open seat next to him. “A truck ran me over.”
His brows pop on his forehead. “Well, that’s about how you look, but seriously, what happened?”
“I had a grueling session with my physical therapist,” I grumble.
Understanding flashes in his eyes. “Ouch, Dr. Snow?”
“How did you know?” I ask, looking at him suspiciously. I mean, can’t a girl have some privacy? There has to be some kind of doctor-patient confidentiality.
“Everybody who plays a sport around these parts eventually ends up working with Dr. Snow.” He shrugs.
“She’s that popular, huh?” I ask dryly, pushing a few sweaty strands behind my ear. I had exchanged my sweaty shirt for a clean one, but there wasn’t saving my hair.
“If by popular you mean hated, then sure. But she’s that good. One of my teammates sprained his ankle last year while doing a keg stand, dumbass, but she got him back in playingshape in no time.”
That made me feel better. But only slightly. My muscles are still quivering from the exertion and I think I lost a few pounds with all the sweating I did.
“That’s probably because the woman has some serious torturing skills and her own place in Hell.”
Nixon throws his head back and laughs at my words. The sound deep, with a slight, sexy rasp to it. It’s not the first time I noticed how attractive he is. It’s not even his golden boy looks, although you can’t deny he’s attractive with that light brown hair streaked with natural, sun-kissed highlights and grayish-blue eyes. It’s his charm and sense of humor too. And kindness. Definitely kindness. But for all his muscled body and sexy laughter, I don’t think I’ll ever be able to take him seriously. Yes, he’s hot. I’d have to be blind and dead not to notice it, but I’d also have to be both those things not to know he’s a playboy. And my days of being interested in playboys are long gone. Besides, he doesn’t give me vibes that he’s even interested in me like that. No, Nixon is more of an annoying older brother.
“You just wait until she pulls out the real torture devices.” He wiggles his brows playfully, laughing.
My face curls in disgust at his innuendo. I think I just threw up in my mouth. “Weee, can’t wait. That will be so much fun.”
Nix’s arm falls over the back of my chair, giving my shoulder a squeeze. “Oh, c’mon, Cals. I’m sure you can do it.”
I wasn’t so sure, but I didn’t say anything. Thankfully, just then the professor entered the room and all the talking stops. Pulling out my books, I turn to the front of the auditorium, but something caught my eyes.
Someone.
Hayden is staring right at me, his eyes narrowed in tiny slits, lips pressed into a tight line. He looks pissed as hell.
I glare right back at him.
What the fuck is his problem? We both did our best to avoid each other at all costs and I go as far as to make sure never to even look in his direction during our Spanish class. At least most of the time.
Nixon’s chuckle draws my attention.
What? I mouth.
He shakes his head, but the amused expression doesn’t leave his face for a second.
“How much do I really need this class?” Nix rubs his chin thoughtfully as we get up and start packing our things as soon as the professor dismisses us.
“Umm…” I turn to look at him. “Like a lot if you want to graduate?”
The period in which we had the right to drop a class was over and there was no going back anymore. We had to pass them all if we wanted to graduate. Plus, there was the fact that he was a football player. If he wanted to keep playing, he had to keep up his GPA to be eligible. Even I know that, basic logic and all that.
“Who came up with that shit, anyway?”
“I have no idea. Why did you even take the class if you didn’t think you could pass it?”
He shrugs. “I was missing a few more gen ed credits to complete my degree.”
“Couldn’t you have chosen something different?”
“Like what? Language seemed like an easy out.”
Incredulous, I stare at him. Language an easy out? In which universe?
“I don’t know! Statistics? English? Ethics? Another language?” Although with how thick his accent is I’m not sure any language is a good choice for him.
“Ehh… that would be a big fat no. Who the fuck even needs to learn a second language? People everywhere speak English.”
That makes me laugh. “No, they most definitely don’t.”
“Nix, you coming?” Hayden yells from a few rows down, effectively killing all the fun from the moment.
“Just a sec.” He throws his backpack over his shoulder, turning his attention back to me. “But seriously, I’m so gonna fail this shit.”
“You’re not going to fail.” I roll my eyes at his exaggeration. He’s such a drama queen.
“I will,” he insists. Then stops to think for a second. Something flashes in his eyes. His lips spread in a smile as weariness creeps underneath my skin. “Although, if…”
“I don’t think I want to know.”
“Callie,” he groans, pressing his hand theatrically against his chest. See what I mean? Drama queen. “Don’t be like that.”
Sighing, I pinch the bridge of my nose. “Okay, what?”
“If you helped me—”
I interrupt him. I knew he was going to go there. I just knew it. “Nixon, that is so not a good idea.”
“Says who?” he counters.
“Says me.”
“Nix!” Hayden yells again. Neither of us budges from our stare off.
“Hayden will pop a vessel,” I point out.
“Hayden can suck my dick. Please, Cals? For me?”
“Nix,” I sigh. When he’s looking at me with those puppy dog eyes, there is no way I can say no to him.
“If I fail this class, I don’t get to play,” he reminds me. Like his ability to play football affects me in any way, shape, or form. “Do you really want that on your conscience?”
“I’m sure there are some amazing, ultra-smart tutors you can find in the student center.”
“But they don’t go with me to class and sit next to me, now do they?” He grins, batting his eyelashes. Seriously, it’s criminal how long they are. Girls would kill for those. “Pretty please? With a cherry on top?”
He knows he has me, it’s in that smug smile of his.
“Ugggh, fine.”
“Yes.” He fist pumps in victory and then surprises me completely by wrapping his arms around me, pulling me in for a hug. “You’re the best.”
“Nix!”
“We’ll see if you think that after he skins you alive.” I don’t even have to tell him who he I’m referring to is. Nixon knows too damn well. “After all, you’re fraternizing with the enemy.”
“Ehh, he’ll get over it.” Nix waves it off.
“Whatever you say.” I shrug. “It’s your funeral.”
“Yeah, yeah. Gotta go before he really loses his mind. We’ll talk later about that tutoring!”
And with that, he’s gone.
Chapter Sixteen
HAYDEN
Tamara: Roomie’s visiting some friends. Wanna hang?
I reread it again. I haven’t talked to Tamara since the whole Callie fiasco on the first day of classes, so I�
��m a little surprised to find her text after practice.
Callie.
Her image flashes in my mind, so clear it startles me at first. I’m not sure I’d be able to remember a person in such detail as I do her.
I’ve been trying my best to ignore her since she crashed the party at my house, but it wasn’t easy. Especially not when she and Nix have become buddies. It shouldn’t irritate me, but it does. I could still see him hugging her. What the fuck’s with that anyway? I could barely speak two words with him when we were hurrying off to practice. Again. I was so pissed off. At him. At her. At the whole damn world. It’s irrational. It’s plain stupid. But I can’t fight the feeling every time I see them together.
I’m not sure what game Nix is playing, but I’m not going to give into it. I’m not going to give him the satisfaction of knowing that he gets to me.
“Hey, Watson!” Emmett calls over the noises in the locker room. I lift my head to face him, mentally shaking my head at myself.
Stop thinking about her.
Like that ever helped.
“We’re gonna grab a bite,” Emmett continues, looking at me. “You coming?”
I look back down at the message.
Not yet, but soon.
“Nah, man.” I shake my head. “I’ve got plans.”
A knowing grin spreads on his lips. “Our boy Hades is getting some action, huh?” he hoots.
I just shake my head at him before grabbing my things and typing one word as I leave.
Me: Coming.
Two girls are just coming out of the dorm, so I rush to hold the door open, giving them my signature grin. They return my smile, knowing and almost wistful look in their eyes as they say hi in unison.
“Ladies,” I say, tilting my head in acknowledgment before I slip inside.
When I saw Tamara’s text I wasn’t sure if it was a good idea, but fuck that. She was willing and I wasn’t about to refuse a no-strings-attached fuck. Anything to get one tiny blonde out of my head.
Opting for stairs instead of waiting for the elevator, I take two steps at a time. Tamara is on the fourth floor.