The imagery alone was disturbing.
Pushing away her sad thoughts, she cuddled up to her eagle while she still could. “Shouldn’t you get into your own bed?” she teased, fitting perfectly in the cove of his shoulder, her hand resting on his chest. “It might be a little awkward to explain if your friends decide to check on us.”
“They won’t. Door locks on the inside. Besides, I think CJ already knows what’s up.”
“Really? Will he rat you out?” she asked, worried.
“Naw, he’s a good guy. More than likely he’ll bust my balls about it in some way because he thought you were cute but he’d never poach on a man’s territory. Bro-code.”
“Bro-code. Blech, sounds very caveman-ish.”
“I didn’t hear you complaining about my brutish mentality a little earlier,” he reminded her with a silky laugh and he could almost feel her blushing. When she remained quiet, he chuckled, saying, “Exactly.”
A beat passed before Caitlin asked, “What happens if I can’t reverse engineer a cure? What if I fail?”
His hold tightened around her. “Don’t think that way. You’re brilliant. You’ll find the cure.”
“I’ve never done something like this. Maybe Tessara put their faith in the wrong person.”
“They didn’t.”
“How do you know?”
“Because I do. I can feel it in my gut. You do your thing and we’ll do ours.”
“I wish I had your confidence. I’m worried.”
“I have faith in you.”
Caitlin fought the urge to cry, not because she was scared or unhappy but because his belief in her shook her to her foundation. She’d never known someone like Zak and she had a feeling she never would again. He truly listened. He didn’t try to offer solutions to her problem. He recognized that she had to process her own demons, in her own way, but he was there for her.
In another life, were they more than passing acquaintances? She didn’t believe in past lives as a general rule, but how else could she explain the intense connection between them when anyone from the outside looking in would rightly call bullshit?
“What was your sister like?”
“Smart, like you.”
“I wish I could’ve met her. She seemed like a cool person.”
His voice was strained as he said, “She was.”
“I’m sorry she’s gone.”
“Me, too.” Zak kissed her forehead and closed his eyes. “Time to sleep.”
She didn’t want to sleep just yet, even though she was exhausted. Sleeping would bring the morning and with morning, the need to pretend that whatever was happening between them wasn’t and that the world wasn’t hanging on the edge of a blade.
For now, she just wanted Zak to hold her and pretend that everything was fine.
Even if it was just for tonight.
Chapter 20
Rebecca and Jonathan showed up two days later, while Robert stayed behind to run his data back at the Vermont lab.
Caitlin was inordinately happy to see Rebecca, which surprised her because she hadn’t realized how much she’d come to appreciate her presence.
“This place is epic,” Rebecca said in awe as she stepped into BSL-4. “How is it that Tessara has this place and nobody knows about it? Tell me I’m not wrong.”
“You’re not wrong,” Caitlin agreed with a grin. Rebecca and Jonathan could appreciate how sweet the lab was, even if they also had questions as to why no one knew about it. “Everything is brand-new and state of the art. Almost as if it was untouched until now. Maybe plans were in the works to staff it but they weren’t planning to share that information until later.”
“Or maybe it’s their secret lab where they perform off-book experiments,” Rebecca supplied with a conspiratorial eyebrow wag. “Seriously, though, wow.”
“Tessara isn’t doing off-book experiments,” Caitlin refuted with more conviction than she felt. Since becoming the lead scientist on this project, she’d found more questions than answers when it came to her employer but her excitement overrode her caution. “I’m so happy you’re here. I’ve been banging my head against a wall trying to factor through some equations. A second pair of eyes would be great.”
“I’m all yours—after I see my sleeping quarters,” Rebecca said giddily. “This feels like something out of a movie. Like a sci-fi movie, you know? Pretty exciting stuff.”
“I can take you. I need a break anyway,” Caitlin said. “Follow me.”
The halls were secure, so she had free rein to go from the lab to her quarters without an escort but she always had to check in with Zak before leaving his sight.
He’d been talking with Scarlett when Laird brought Jonathan and Rebecca through and now nodded when she said she was taking them to their rooms.
“Each room has key-card access but they also lock from the inside,” Caitlin explained, feeling like a pro at this point. “Just like a hotel.”
“Fancy stuff. Imagine if our lab had sleeping quarters,” Rebecca said, impressed. “Where’s your room?”
“Just down the hall.”
“With your hunky protector?” Rebecca guessed with a sly grin and Caitlin just smiled and moved on. Surprisingly, Rebecca didn’t press for more details but Caitlin supposed that the new lab was more exciting than Zak for the moment. “This is some wild stuff. My God, I knew Tessara had deep pockets but this is incredible. An entire lab at their disposal, like an extra box of crackers at the back of the pantry, and not just any old lab but a BSL-4 lab? Good gravy, this is like Christmas.”
Caitlin giggled, pleased to share with someone who actually understood how exciting it was to be in a lab setting of this caliber. “It feels like our own private lab, doesn’t it?” she said.
“Yeah, it does. We can be mad scientists here,” Rebecca said, taking in everything with an expression of pure awe. “Except without the mad part.” A beat of silence passed between them before Rebecca turned to Caitlin and said, “I’m really glad you’re safe. I’ve been worried.”
For the first time, Caitlin saw Rebecca showing genuine emotion, not overcompensating with over-the-top, hormone-riddled, pushy banter, but real talk, and it occurred to Caitlin that maybe this was the real Rebecca and not the persona she’d previously projected. “Thank you. I was scared,” Caitlin admitted. “Being shot at is no picnic. I don’t recommend it.”
Rebecca responded with a small laugh. “No? Surprising. They make it look like such good cardio in the movies. All that jumping and dodging.”
“It’s mostly a lot of dropping to the floor, glass shattering and trying not to pee your pants. At least that’s how it unfolded in my experience.”
“Cardio is overrated anyway,” Rebecca said. “Any news on who might’ve taken the sample?”
“No, not exactly but they think whoever took the sample is going to release it as a way of cleansing the earth of the sinners.”
“Sinners? You’re telling me this is a religious thing?”
“It looks that way.”
“Good grief. That’s a pain in the ass to deal with.”
“You’re telling me. Greed is easier to understand.”
Rebecca sighed. “So that explains why they’re trying to wipe you out. No need for a cure if they’re not planning on curing anyone.”
“Exactly. But that really puts the pressure on us to find that cure. The fate of the world—all of us unrepentant sinners—rests on our shoulders.”
“Ah, great,” Rebecca said.
“Yeah, exactly.”
“How are you holding up?”
“Um, well, okay, I guess. I don’t think I’ve had time to freak out but I’m sure if we survive, I’ll have to schedule in a nervous breakdown.”
Rebecca laughed. “That’s the spirit. I love how your priorities are always on point.”
“I wish my parents felt that way,” Caitlin retorted with a wry laugh. “They’ve questioned my priorities ever since I accepted a position with Tessara.”
“Can you blame them? I mean, let’s get real. We both know Tessara is a mixed bag but you make sacrifices if you want to be involved on the ground floor of great things. I guess what I’m saying is, I’m okay with breaking a few eggs to make an omelette.”
Caitlin chuckled but was she actually saying that? Maybe that was the issue. She was still clinging to a naive understanding of science when Rebecca had embraced the good, the bad and the ugly without blinking an eye.
Maybe she needed to be more like Rebecca.
“So how’s things back at the lab?” she asked.
“Oh, it’s a shit-show. Stan is losing what little hair he has left over this situation. He’s getting some heat from the brass about the break-in but that’s why he gets paid the big bucks—to deal with the bureaucratic bullshit, right?”
“Yeah, I guess so.”
Rebecca went to the bed and tested it with a few exploratory bounces. “Not bad, firm but not too firm. I think I can make this work for the time being.”
“The bed is actually pretty comfortable,” she said, trying not to think about how much she adored falling asleep in Zak’s arms. Her life seemed surreal. She worked all day in the lab while Zak and his team ran down leads on the various religious groups that might be responsible for this looming catastrophe, and at night she and Zak attacked each other behind closed doors, then fell asleep wrapped around each other. A new day dawned and they repeated the cycle.
It seemed weird but somehow she knew, when it was all said and done, she was going to miss this.
* * *
Zak frowned at the intel Scarlett had gathered. “Are you kidding me?” Scarlett confirmed the intel with a nod and he cursed under his breath. “This shit is getting ridiculous. So when is this lunar event supposed to happen?”
“In two weeks. According to what the followers of the Faith of the Chosen believe, a major lunar event will signal the catalyst required of the faithful to cleanse the earth of the unclean. And it just so happens that for the first time in hundreds of years, there will be a super blue moon eclipse, and these idiots think that by starting some kind of worldwide event it will bring on the apocalypse.”
“Kind of like pushing the start button on a really big cosmic machine primed to destroy the earth,” CJ put in. “I admire their conviction if not their total craziness.”
“I can’t with this bullshit,” Zak muttered, rubbing his eyeballs because his brain hurt. “It doesn’t surprise me that there are enough idiots out there that believe this crap but it does surprise me that there are supposedly smart people with enough money to fund this stupid plan.”
“Yeah, this makes the flat-earthers look like amateurs.”
“At least flat-earthers aren’t trying to wipe humanity off the planet,” Zak said. “Right? Jesus, Mary and Joseph, this gives me a migraine.”
“So here’s the plan. I’m going to send Laird and CJ to snoop around the top brass of the so-called Faith of the Chosen and see what we can’t shake out of them. Maybe they’ll break easily and we can end this nightmare fast and under the radar.”
“Something tells me that’s not in the cards. If they had big enough balls to steal from Tessara, they aren’t playing around. They’ve got a contingency plan and they’ve got the money to hide.”
“Well, this is where we start. In the meantime, keep the doc safe and working, and we’ll do the rest.”
“I hate sitting here like a lame duck,” Zak muttered. “I’d rather be out there doing something useful.”
“The doctor seems to trust you. We need her focused. In the event that this situation goes sour, we’re going to need her to come through with the cure. So whatever, you’re doing...keep doing it.”
Zak flushed with guilt but managed to keep his reaction on the downlow. What was he doing? Aside from doing the doctor? Don’t get it twisted, he enjoyed every minute with Caitlin but he was starting to get twitchy. He felt useless remaining behind when the real action was out there, outside this box.
“C’mon, TL, you know I’m better on the outside. I’m starting to go stir-crazy in here.”
Scarlett’s expression softened with understanding. “I know. This isn’t anything like our usual operation but the stakes are so much higher. We’re all just trying to save our own asses in this one, right? We’re talking end of the world. Not just crooked politicians and screwed-up, greedy bastards trying to get rich on the backs of innocent people. This is the realest shit we’ve ever been in and what we’re doing matters.”
Zak ducked his head, ashamed. Big-picture time. “Yeah, you’re right. I’ll keep doing my part. I just feel like I’m not doing enough.”
“Trust me, you have the most important job.”
He was overwhelmed by the urge to come clean with Scarlett about Caitlin but he knew now wasn’t the time. She had enough on her plate to add his issues, too. “When are they leaving?” he asked.
“Red-eye flight tonight. The Faith of the Chosen have one of their chief officers in New York.”
CJ rose, saying, “Speaking of, I better freshen up. I want to look my best when I go to meet up with one of God’s warriors.”
Zak couldn’t help the laugh. “Don’t forget to wear your pentacle necklace.”
“Already part of the plan, bruh.”
“You two chuckleheads are going to be the death of me,” Scarlett muttered as CJ and Laird walked out of the room, trading jokes and ideas about how best to get under the Faithful’s skin. Zak rose to leave, too, but she stopped him with a question. “Are you sleeping with her?”
It was a blunt question. He could be honest or he could lie. Both options were problematic.
“Your silence is my answer,” Scarlett said, sharp as ever.
He supposed there was no sense in lying now. “It just sort of happened.”
She leveled a wry look his way. “What are you, fifteen? Your dick does not just happen to find its way inside a woman by accident. Take responsibility, man.”
He bristled slightly. “Okay, yeah, it happened and I’m not sorry. We’re not sorry. I think I might love her.”
The “L” word. He hadn’t meant to drop that bomb. It just came out but it felt right, even if he didn’t know what to do with it. Maybe he wasn’t meant to do anything with it because nothing had changed but he could admit to his feelings, right? Yeah, in a different life, maybe they did the white picket fence thing, had babies, got fat together and bickered over who got ownership over the television remote—no contest, he’d win—but in this life, he was a messed-up soldier with a head full of issues and she was a superscientist who was too smart to get mixed up with someone like him, so there was no sense in touching that hot stove.
But Scarlett was still going to bust his balls about it.
“Jesus, Zak, what are you doing?” she asked, exasperated. “You know this is against the rules.”
“Yeah? And so was you and Xander knocking boots when you were his superior and he was a Red Wolf team member. Rules don’t always apply evenly to people like us. We break rules for a living.”
She couldn’t argue that point but added a good one of her own. “She’s a civilian. She’s used to living her life by a certain set of standards. You’re going to break her.”
“She’s stronger than you give her credit for.”
“Seriously, Zak, I should do the right thing and switch you out. You’re compromised.”
“Or maybe I’m even more dedicated. I would die before I’d let anyone hurt her.”
“Solid point,” she conceded with a grumble. “So what does this mean? She knows about your past? About your work? What you do for a living?”
“A little but we don’t really t
alk about that stuff.”
“So it’s basically just a sexual thing?”
“No, I can’t say that’s true. I feel things.” Deep things. “It’s different than anything I’ve ever experienced. Kinda scary, actually.”
“Great,” she said with derision. “That’s just what we need. You falling in love for the first time in your life. Look, I don’t have the time to lecture you on your stupidity because whatever you’re doing seems to be working. She’s calm and focused when before she was like a long-tailed cat in a room filled with rockers. However, this is going to blow up and it’s not going to be pretty. I can only hope we’re all alive long enough to deal with the fallout.”
“She knows this is a temporary situation. No one is looking to buy in. For whatever reasons, it works between us and I don’t want to question it right now. Not when the stakes are so high for all of us.”
Scarlett nodded, giving in with a muttered expletive. “Fine. But we keep this on the downlow. I don’t need Joshua finding out about this. My ass is still sore from the bite he took out of it when he found out about me and Xander.”
Joshua Handler, the owner of Red Wolf, was the man behind the team. He was former military so he knew how things worked but his record was completely redacted. Whatever he’d done for Uncle Sam had been so deeply classified no one left alive was talking about it. He had connections in all the right places, had deep enough pockets from taking the right jobs and ran a lean, mean fighting machine. He took no crap and gave none, either. He was legit scary but if he had your back, you had nothing to worry about.
“Fair enough, TL.” They were a true ride-or-die team, no matter what. He should’ve known Scarlett would have his back. “I’m sorry I wasn’t honest right away.”
She waved away his apologies. “You had your reasons. We’ve all had our reasons, one way or another. Just as long as it doesn’t interfere with the job, understand?”
“One hundred.”
“All right, get out of my face. I need to go over this tactical plan before CJ and Laird ship out.”
Soldier Protector (Military Precision Heroes Book 2) Page 17