by Karis Walsh
“You’re a cop?”
She shrugged. “I’m familiar with the officer who found coke on your property,” she said vaguely. “What would have happened if you hadn’t agreed to sell your house?”
He looked past her to Kira. “Who are you?”
Kira met his gaze with her direct one. “I’m someone who was screwed over by the same cop.”
Abby gave her a quick smile and turned back to Sal. Kira’s honesty seemed to have won him over.
“I don’t want trouble. I was warned not to talk to anyone about what happened, and to be thankful I was only arrested for possession, not intent, so if anyone else comes asking about this, I’ll deny it. But he had two bags of coke in his hands. One was small, the other was big. He said I had the choice about which one he’d happen to find in my pocket. If I agreed to take an offer for my house in the next week, he’d find the little one. If not, I’d be going away for a long time.”
“I’m sorry about what happened to you, Mr. Hendrick. I won’t tell anyone what you said here today.”
“I don’t want trouble,” he repeated.
“I know.” Abby motioned for Kira to go down the stairs ahead of her. She was shaking inside, imagining her brother hefting the two bags of coke in his hands while Sal stood by helpless to do anything but agree to his terms. “Thank you for talking to us.”
“What are you thinking?” Kira asked her when they got in the car. “Are you going to buy him a house to make up for this?”
“I don’t know,” Abby said. She felt overwhelmed by the information he’d given her. She’d expected it after their research, but it had been abstract then. Now there was a face attached to the report in her mind. She’d been suspicious of her brother’s dealings with Hendrick from the start, but she hadn’t realized the extent of the damage. “I don’t know how to make this right.”
Kira took her hand as she drove, and Abby appreciated the gesture. She was caught up in the relief of having someone else with her to share the frustration and helplessness she often faced when she dug into the cases her family had botched, and she was almost too distracted to see the Tacoma police car several places behind them when they stopped at a light. She told herself not to be so paranoid. She was in Tacoma, so a patrol car was hardly a sight worthy of concern. But still, she watched it turn to the right when Kira turned left into the nature center’s lot.
“What now?” Kira asked.
“I’m not sure. I’ll need to think this through and decide what the next step should be.”
“Come home with me,” Kira said. She blushed and stammered as she rushed through an explanation of her words. “To dinner. With me and Julie. She’ll be home from school soon. She’d be glad to see you, and besides, you can’t cook like that.”
She gestured at Abby’s wrapped arm. Abby’s thoughts were as much on the possible interpretations of Kira’s first statement as on the patrol car that might have been following them. Either way, she was going to make yet another concession to her carefully formulated set of personal rules.
“I’d love to.”
Chapter Eighteen
Abby parked along the curb behind Kira’s car and followed her to the porch. She was watching both ends of the street in case a patrol car drove by, and she almost didn’t notice how vigilant Kira was as well. She wasn’t looking down the block like Abby was, but she was scanning the yard near her front steps, where a recently trimmed rhododendron grew. Abby encouraged people to be aware of their surroundings, but she knew the reason for Kira’s nervous-looking glances. She was angry that Kira had to feel afraid at her own home, but she hoped her presence for one evening would help a little. She was certain Kira would balk at any sign of protectiveness from Abby, so she didn’t mention the possibility of a car following them, and she definitely wasn’t going to tell Kira that the reason she had accepted the dinner invitation was because she worried about her.
Abby wasn’t just worried about Kira’s safety, but also about her own. She had been semi-teasing when she had offered to grill steaks for Kira, but the thought of having her over for an intimate dinner was very appealing. Then she had barely considered the wisdom behind accepting Kira’s invitation. She was being pulled closer, and she was losing the ability to resist. Or the desire to resist…
Abby went into the living room and stared around her. The space was as full of warmth as her own was barren. The furniture was nice, but plain. A green sofa and a plaid recliner, a few end tables and lamps, a TV. Standard and unremarkable. The objects scattered around the room gave it life. Julie’s coat, thrown over the back of the couch. Horse figurines and an open math book with a sheet of penciled calculations next to it. A towering pile of field guides and a dozen different leaves and branches on the coffee table. A backgammon board, set and ready for a game. Abby had a vision of Kira and Julie working and playing here together in the evenings. She’d love to be part of something like this, but where would she fit in? Would she be stretched out in the recliner, with a stack of old crime reports next to her? Would she share details about her grandfather’s sketchy relationship with a prostitute while Julie and Kira told her about their days?
She didn’t belong in this type of normal.
“Why don’t you sit in here while I cook,” Kira said. She gestured toward the stools placed near the kitchen’s island. “I’ll get these out of your way…”
Abby perched on one of the stools while Kira gathered the papers that had been strewn across the granite countertop. She picked up a form when it slipped from Kira’s grasp and read the address at the top of the page. It was a soil analysis from Milford’s wetland. She handed it back to Kira.
“Why wetlands?” she asked. She needed to focus on the murder, not on the floral scent of Kira when she stood so close. The fragrance permeated Abby’s car now, and she had barely been able to focus on driving as she had followed Kira here. She had to get her mind back on track. Once she found out who had killed Tad Milford, she would know whether Kira was safe or not and how she was connected. The wetland property seemed to be at the heart of the crime, and Abby needed to learn as much as she could about it. “What drew you to this field?”
Kira looked thoughtful as she got a bottle of wine and a corkscrew out of a cupboard. “I was a sophomore in college, but I hadn’t picked a major yet. I was torn between chemistry and biology. Do you like chianti?” Abby nodded and Kira opened the bottle with one smooth twist of the corkscrew. She poured them each a glass and took a sip before she continued. “I didn’t date much in high school since I was more concerned about grades than anything else, but I had a more active social life once I got to college. A few boyfriends, girlfriends. A little pregnant…”
She laughed and took another drink of wine. “I can’t imagine my life without Julie now, but at the time I was frightened about what my grandparents would say, and what would happen with school. I came back here from Eugene to tell them the news in person, but I was dreading the conversation so I stopped at a yogurt shop in a strip mall near home. It had been built while I was at college, and I was sitting there eating a bowl of strawberry frozen yogurt with mini chocolate chips when I remembered how I used to play on the property when I was in grade school. There had been a small pond and lots of plants and birds and trees. I’d even seen raccoons and salamanders.”
Abby toyed with the stem of her glass while she watched Kira lose herself in a far-off memory. She could picture the little girl Kira had been, running along a mossy path and exploring the banks of the pond while birds sang in the trees. She took a drink of the dry red wine and let the hints of cherry and violets linger on her tongue. Better than any painkillers her doctor could give her.
“I was stunned by the loss,” Kira continued. She went to the fridge and pulled out an onion and several packaged items. “Hundreds of types of birds and plants had been wiped out, replaced by a cement lot and an ugly building. All so I could eat a bowl of artificially colored frozen yogurt. I went to my grandparents’
house with a new mission. I wanted to save these areas, keep them from all going the same way as the one I had played in as a child. I had been worried I might need to leave school, but after making the decision about what I wanted to do with my life, I knew I couldn’t. How could I raise a child in this world without fighting to preserve what was valuable and beautiful in it for her to enjoy? Anyway, my grandparents didn’t just support me emotionally, but they went back to Eugene with me and we raised Julie together.”
Abby watched Kira chop some pancetta and toss it into a hot frying pan. She spun the wineglass in a circle on the countertop. Sitting here and listening to Kira’s soft alto as she spoke made memories resurface in Abby’s mind, too. She had sat on the peninsula in her mom’s kitchen. Doing her homework, talking about friends and school. But Kira’s story ended with a tale of generations coming together to make an individual family stronger, and to make the world a better place. Abby’s ended just the opposite.
“I didn’t go the traditional route with Julie. Marriage, or even being a single mom. But I wouldn’t change a thing. She has wonderful memories of living with the three of us, and I’m grateful for that. I might have been looking too hard for a replacement for our extended family when I met Dale, but still—even my experience with her made us stronger.”
Kira diced an onion and added it to the pan. She watched Abby twirl the wineglass and wondered what was on her mind. She had noticed Abby’s tendency to fidget with increasing intensity as her mind worked through some agitation or another, but she kept silent. A broken glass could be replaced, and Abby seemed to need a kinesthetic outlet when her thoughts were troubling. Kira had a few ideas about other outlets she might provide for Abby’s fidgeting needs, but she was definitely keeping those to herself.
She dumped a container of Manzanilla and Kalamata olives onto her cutting board and gave them a rough chop. She wanted to ask about Abby’s career choice, too, but she had a feeling the answer was tied in with the secret lair in Abby’s house. “What would you have done?” she asked instead. “If you hadn’t joined the police force?”
“Something with horses. I was planning to apply to WSU’s vet school when I…changed my mind.”
“Hey, Mom. Hi, Abby! I was wondering whose car was in front of the house.” Julie burst through the door, dropping coat and backpack and shoes as she traveled through the living room. Her arrival kept Kira from saying she was sorry that Abby had given up her dream. All for the best, since she knew Abby wouldn’t want her pity.
“Hi, Jules. How was school?”
Kira winked at Abby as Julie chattered on about her upcoming field trip, her friend’s new outfit, and the pop quiz in her English class—totally unfair since Ms. Campbell knew she was showing at the fair this week—while she busied herself getting a snack from the fridge. Kira was accustomed to the way Julie filled the empty space in the house until it felt ready to burst with her enthusiasm and energy, but Abby seemed startled by the crackling change in the atmosphere. Julie handed each adult a brownie before she plopped on the stool next to Abby with one for herself and a glass of milk.
“What’s for dinner? Is Abby staying?”
“Flatbread pizzas, and yes, she is.” Kira took a bite of her brownie and saw Abby look at her with raised eyebrows before she did the same. “Don’t worry about eating dessert first. These are made with pureed prunes and wheat germ, so they’re healthy enough to eat as a meal.”
“Hmm. I can barely tell,” Abby said as she chewed the brownie. “They taste almost like the real thing.”
Julie laughed and finished her milk in a quick gulp. “Hey, what happened to your arm? Did you fall off Legs while you were chasing a felon?”
Abby looked at her as if asking how much she wanted Julie to know about the accident. Part of Kira wanted to hide the truth from Julie, to protect her innocence, but she chose honesty instead. “Someone gave Legs an illegal substance, Julie. It made her act a little crazy, and Abby got hurt.”
“How’s poor Legs?”
“She’ll be fine,” Abby said. Kira watched her rub her palm again, just above the edge of the bandage. “She’s staying with our vet for a while.”
Kira sprinkled some pine nuts on a baking sheet and put them in the oven to brown. Julie was less reticent than Kira, and she was peppering Abby with questions about the accident. Abby managed, without much difficulty, to turn the conversation back to Julie and her upcoming championship classes with Nirvana. Kira sliced a lump of fresh mozzarella and wondered how the evening had spun away from her original goal for it. She had been concerned about Abby’s pale cheeks and weary eyes, and she had guessed that without her invitation, Abby would have had a beer and some aspirin for dinner. She also hadn’t been able to bear the thought of Abby sitting alone in her house, probably working on more files until she fell asleep in her desk chair. Kira had wanted to take care of her, partly in repayment for Abby’s kindness on Saturday, but mostly because Kira wanted to be with her. To soothe her weariness and to learn more about her and the person she’d been before she took up her crusade. But watching Abby and Julie talk, listening to their laughter, gave Kira something she hadn’t expected. A sense of family, of home.
Kira nearly took a slice off her index finger as she was cutting. She shouldn’t feel that way about Abby. About a woman devoted not only to her dangerous career as a police officer, but even more to her secret battle to save the world from her family. Kira admired Abby for what she was doing, but she didn’t want Abby’s cause to infiltrate her life. Because where Abby went, her family’s past was sure to follow. Kira interrupted Julie and Abby’s discussion about the best way to slow down Nirvana’s trot during the showmanship class.
“Come over here, you two, and make your pizzas.” Keep focused on the mundane. Food and wine, Julie’s homework, the protection of her own heart. Daily life. She topped her flatbread with an orderly arrangement of olives and pancetta bits and pine nuts, covered with a thin layer of mozzarella. Julie used her condiments to make flowers and smiley faces, and Abby topped her cheese with an intricate picture of a galloping horse.
Even the everyday was more fun with Abby there. Except for Julie’s friends and an occasional volunteer who stayed for a meal, Kira didn’t invite people into her house often. She was social enough and enjoyed her friendships, but home had become a sanctuary for her. A private world she shared with Julie and hadn’t expected to share with another woman ever again. Yet here was Abby—so different and so unsuitable, with her family ties that kept her in bondage and her take-charge attitude—and she somehow fit.
While the pizzas heated in the oven, Kira made a quick salad using some purslane and cress she’d found in one of her wetlands. They ate dinner off trays in the living room while they watched an episode of Jeopardy, competing to see who could come up with the correct questions the quickest, and then Julie did her homework while Abby and Kira played a game of backgammon. Kira would have figured that having Abby over for dinner would have been like having a guest, someone to entertain. Instead, Abby slid right into their normal evening routine as if she’d been there for years.
“Thank you for this,” Abby said when they were out on Kira’s back porch, sitting on a wrought-iron bench and wrapped in blankets to ward off the evening chill. Julie had disappeared into her bedroom with the phone as soon as her homework was finished, and Kira had poured the last of the wine into their glasses.
“For beating your ass in backgammon?” Kira asked. “You’re quite welcome.”
“I still think you have weighted dice. How many double sixes did you roll in those three games?”
Kira shrugged, feeling the warmth and pressure of Abby’s arm against hers as she moved. “I didn’t cheat, I just have incredible skills. It’s all in the wrist.” She mimed tossing the dice with a flourish, and then gestured toward Abby’s wounded arm with an exaggerated gasp. “Oh, sorry. No wonder you lost.”
She felt the vibrations of their shared laughter as Abby slid her ar
m along the bench behind her shoulders. Abby stroked a stray strand of Kira’s hair, tracing the edge of her earlobe, and Kira leaned into her hand. Abby’s fingers only skimmed her surface, but the sensation traveled all the way into Kira’s bones, into her heart. Abby’s touch, like everything else about the evening, felt too right. Kira knew she was supposed to fight her urge to want Abby—her company, her touch, her kisses—but she couldn’t remember why. Abby was bossy and domineering, yes, but she had also shown her vulnerable side. Her strength was real and steadfast, not just for show or to mask insecurity, like Dale’s had been. Kira had been thinking earlier about how Abby would bring her fight for justice into any relationship she had, but Kira brought along a few battles of her own. To conserve as many wetland areas as she could. To remain strong and independent. She’d expect those to be part of the life she built with a partner, just like Abby would expect to have her needs respected. Kira sighed and felt her defenses weakening as Abby tugged her hair loose from its braid and wrapped her fingers in it.
“Seriously, Kira, thank you for inviting me here tonight. I don’t remember the last time I spent time with a normal family.”
Kira heard the catch in Abby’s voice and she wondered if Abby really did remember that last time. The final moment of innocent family life before she was thrown into her quest. “I’m glad you came,” she whispered. The words were too simple to express how happy she was to have Abby here with her instead of alone in her empty house.
Kira sat close against Abby’s side and she saw Abby’s head move toward hers. She was expecting Abby’s kiss, she was waiting for it, but she wasn’t prepared for her reaction when their lips finally touched. The contact was brief and tentative, but Kira inhaled sharply and involuntarily. She heard and felt Abby do the same. Kira paused for several breaths, only millimeters from Abby’s mouth, and then she closed the distance between them and kissed Abby again.