by Erin Kern
She shook her head, and he finally let go of her. “But you don’t need me for that.”
He grabbed her shoulders, needing her to understand. “Hell, yes, I do.”
She licked her lips again, and damn, he was this close to kissing her. “Cameron—”
“Don’t go back to Boulder,” he interrupted.
Her eyes grew wide. “I have to.”
He shrugged that off. “Okay, fine go back and tie up loose ends. But come back and don’t leave again.”
One of her brows arched. “Is that an order?”
“You know what I mean,” he answered.
“Actually, I’m not sure I do.”
He blew out a breath, getting the feeling he was blowing this. He was stumbling over his words too much, or not using enough finesse to get his point across. And what was his point? He wanted her to stay in Blanco Valley. He wanted her to move all her shit to his house and sleep in his bed. He wanted to turn the guest room into a girly, pink room for Piper. Hell, he’d even buy the damn cat her own bed.
But how could he make Audrey understand that? He’d never been good with words, and he knew that’s what she was waiting for.
He shoved a hand through his too-long hair. “I got a job offer in Denver,” he told her. “To be the head coach for a high school up there.”
She gaped at him for so long, Cameron wasn’t sure she was going to answer. “Congratulations,” she finally said.
He wanted to grab her and shake her. “That’s all you’re going to say? You’re not going to get all pissy for not telling you or possibly uprooting Piper again?”
“Do you want me to get pissy?” she asked.
He stood from the steps and glared down at her. “I want you to be honest. I want you to stomp your foot and yell at me for not thinking of Piper first. I want you to tell me to stay.”
She stood on the bottom step, so they were eye level. “If I tell you to stay, will you?”
Damn, this conversation wasn’t going as planned. “I haven’t decided yet.”
She jerked as though he’d stuck her. “Then why did you ask me?”
“Jesus,” he muttered to himself. He always felt like he was talking in circles with this woman. “I don’t know. I thought I did, but…” His words trailed off because, dammit, he didn’t know anymore.
Her eyes searched his, looking dangerously close to welling up. “But what?” When he didn’t answer, she went on. “I can’t tell you what to do, Cameron.”
“But you want to,” he guessed. Actually, it wasn’t a guess. He knew she was dying to blurt out all her feelings.
“What, are you waiting for me to tell you what to do? You won’t make a decision unless you know how I feel about it?”
Was that what he was doing? Was that why he’d waited so long to have this discussion? Her opinion mattered to him, and yet he knew the decision was solely his. So why was he having such a hard time?
Audrey glanced over her shoulder as though looking for someone else. “You don’t even know what you want, do you?”
That wasn’t true. He knew he wanted her and Piper. Hell, he wanted the whole family thing. But was he willing to give up his dream offer?
“Audrey—”
“You can’t have it all, Cameron,” she interrupted. “I can see the wheels turning in your mind. You’re trying to figure out a way to tie the whole package together the way you want it.”
That wasn’t what he was doing. Was it?
With a frustrated groan, Cameron ran a hand over his head. “Audrey,” he said again. He opened his mouth to tell her…Hell, he didn’t know what he wanted to tell her. Yeah, he wanted this job. He wanted Audrey too. But he didn’t know how to do both. She didn’t even live here, and he couldn’t bring himself to ask her to give up her life for him. Especially when he didn’t even know where he was going.
Audrey shook her head. “You know where to find me when you’ve made up your mind.”
Audrey inhaled a shaky breath and looked like she was about to say more when they both heard a snort from behind them. Piper was curled up on the swing, fast asleep with the cat curled into a tight ball at her feet.
“I’ll carry her to bed,” Cameron said.
Twenty
Cameron knew Audrey was mad at him, and he didn’t blame her.
You’ve scared her off.
Of that, he was reasonably sure. But why was she spooked? Okay, he got that she had trust issues. He of all people understood trust issues. But he figured after he’d opened up that whole can of worms that was Drew Spalding, she’d see it as an act of faith and realize that he was trying, trying more than he had with any other woman.
After she’d snuck back into the guesthouse, he’d left Piper on the couch for a little while before carrying her to her bed. He’d tucked her in, expecting Audrey to show herself and put Piper in her pajamas. But her bedroom door had been closed with no sound, so he’d assumed she’d gone to bed, even though it had been just shy of nine o’clock.
An hour later, he was still pacing around the living room, trying to figure out how to make things right with her. He knew they were off. Audrey was vivacious and opinionated. She rarely hid from him, and the fact that she’d slipped away so suddenly didn’t sit well with him.
His indecisiveness freaked her out. Hell, it freaked him out. He’d been so sure of what he’d wanted. Of where he was going. Now he didn’t know up from down. And what scared him more than anything was for the first time, a woman was worth giving up what he thought he’d always wanted. Damn, he was no good at this, and being left to his own thoughts probably wasn’t the best thing. He was going to think himself into insanity.
He tossed a look at his bedroom, thinking he ought to just go to bed and sort things out with Audrey in the morning. But he knew if he lay down right now, he wouldn’t sleep. He’d spend the entire night replaying their conversation over and over again, wondering where he’d gone wrong, what he could have done differently.
Not let her out of his sight.
That had been a mistake. He should have forced her to come clean before giving her a chance to escape.
Cameron took one more turn around the room, then shoved a hand through his hair.
Screw it.
He’d just have to go over there and demand they talk this out.
He let himself out the back door and tromped across the damp grass. The night was chilly and overcast, and Cameron wished he’d left his sweatshirt on. Without knocking, because he knew she wouldn’t answer, he let himself through the front door. Luckily the screen door was already open, because the thing tended to squeak, and he didn’t want to give Audrey any warnings.
The inside was dark and quiet. It smelled good, like cinnamon and Audrey. Plus she’d done an amazing job of keeping the place clean and making it homey. There were a couple of pictures Piper had colored stuck to the fridge with magnets. A blanket was tossed over the back of the couch, and a vase of flowers sat on the kitchen counter. Cameron had never taken the time to do much with the place, because no one ever stayed here. But he knew he’d never be able to step foot inside without thinking of her.
Cameron glanced around one more time and was about to leave when he did a double take down the hallway. A slant of light spilled out from underneath the bathroom door.
Gotcha.
The corner of his mouth curled. She thought she could hide from him.
With silent footsteps, he crossed the small living space and came to a stop at the bathroom. He pressed his ear to the door, trying to listen for any sound. The shower. Crying. Humming.
Nothing.
Then, a splash of water.
Was she in the tub? Cameron tried to chase the image away, but his mind was tricky. The image formed faster than he could stop it. Suds clinging to her damp skin. One leg propped up on the edge, perfect for him to slip in between…
Okay, this isn’t why you’re here.
Quietly he knocked.
He brac
ed himself for silence, which was what he got.
He knocked again. “Audrey,” he said quietly so as not to wake Piper.
“You can come in,” she told him.
Wait, she wanted him to come in? What if she was all naked and stuff? And soapy? How was he supposed to stand there with her naked in the bathtub?
Maybe she was just running water in the sink and that was the splashing he’d heard. But Cameron knew he couldn’t possibly be that lucky, and the second the turned the knob he knew he was right.
Yep. Naked in the bathtub.
“Uh…I can come back.”
The only saving grace was the giant mound of bubbles that covered everything but her head, which was leaned back. Her eyes were closed, and her hair was piled in a loose knot on top of her head.
“No need,” she said without looking at him.
But Cameron just stood there, imagining things that he shouldn’t be, like what was underneath the bubbles and how she’d managed to wash her back. Because, you know, he could, like, wash it for her. Or something.
He cleared his throat.
Say something intelligent, dumbass.
“No, really. I think I should come back.” Okay, that’s not intelligent.
She lifted her head and pinned him with her brown eyes. “What’s the matter? Never seen a woman in a bathtub before? Because I would find that hard to believe.”
Was she for real? “Is that a trick question?”
She tilted her head as though in thought. “Actually, no.” She ran her palm over the top of the bubbles. “What’re you doing here, Cameron? Besides destroying my relaxation.”
“You’re the one who told me to come in,” he pointed out.
“Because I knew you wouldn’t just go away.”
Okay, that was true.
He leaned against the bathroom counter. Was it just him, or were the bubbles diminishing? “We need to finish our earlier conversation,” he told her. Kudos to him for keeping his mind on track. When she didn’t respond, he glanced at her. “Audrey—”
“Cameron,” she interrupted in a quiet voice. “I can’t have this conversation right now.”
“Okay,” he responded, because he wasn’t sure what else to say. “Look, I know I have a lot of thinking to do, and to be honest I’m…” He blew out a breath. “I’m confused.”
“I get that. And maybe…” She glanced at him quickly, but then her gaze skittered away. “Maybe you just need some time alone. To think about things.”
“So where does this leave us?” he asked. Time alone? Like without her? Cameron didn’t want that. He wanted her here, with them. Him and Piper. The three of them, like…like a family.
She was silent a moment, then blew out a breath. “I’m not sure.”
Cameron crossed his arms over his chest and stared at the gray bath rug. “I don’t think I’m the only one who doesn’t know what they want.”
She looked at him. “Okay, maybe I don’t know what I want right now. But you have someone else looking to you for stability. You have to give that to Piper now.”
His brow furrowed. “You think I don’t know that?”
Audrey sat straighter in the tub, sending water sloshing over the sides. “How the hell should I know? You don’t even know what you want, so how should I know?”
He blew out a frustrated breath. “I didn’t come in here to fight with you. I…” Cameron ran the words through his mind, knowing what he wanted to say, but unsure how to say it. “What if you moved down here?”
Audrey blinked at him as though unable to comprehend his words. “Cameron, be serious.”
“I am being serious.”
“We were just talking about how you need time to think,” she told him. “Because you don’t know what you want.”
“I know I want this,” he stated with confidence.
“This what?” she pressed. “What exactly will this be?”
He looked her dead in the eye. “This will be you and me. You, me, and Piper.” Because that was what he wanted. Set aside the job and Drew and everything else, and all that mattered were Audrey and Piper.
“And how am I supposed to believe that you’re ready to settle down?” she countered. “You’ve always had this carefree lifestyle of women coming and going, and now all of a sudden you want to do the family thing? What if you decide it’s too much?” she questioned. “What if one day you can’t handle it anymore, and you check out? You leave me and Piper to handle things ourselves because this isn’t what you signed up for—”
“Audrey,” he interrupted, knowing where her fears were coming from. He squatted next to the bathtub, inhaling the fresh scent of her soap and the bubbles. “I’m not your father,” he told her. “I won’t just quit on you when it becomes inconvenient for me. I know everyone else in your life has done that, but that’s not me.”
She offered him a sad smile of understanding. “I know, I just…” Her gaze skittered away again. “I have a hard time separating the two. Nothing in my life has ever been permanent.”
Cameron couldn’t stand to hear any more, because Audrey had so much to offer people. It was a horrible waste to know a person of her warmth and giving nature would intentionally isolate herself.
“Look, this whole thing is new for me too,” he admitted. “I’m not saying I’m perfect and I won’t disappoint you. And yeah, I’m unsure about the job. I won’t lie by saying the offer doesn’t mean anything, because it does. But I’ll try, and that’s what should matter.” Right? But when she didn’t respond, he pushed her. “Audrey—”
“Could you hand me a towel?” she interrupted.
Um…sure? Or how about no towel?
But seriously, he was trying to have a conversation, and here she was trying to make his brain explode.
He stood and yanked the towel off the bar and held it out to her. Before he had a chance to react or, say, turn around, she stood from the tub, water and soap running down her trim body, clinging to her round breasts, soft tummy, and lean thighs.
Cameron swallowed, almost taking his tongue with it, and turned around. He figured taking the initiative to give her a moment of privacy would be the gentlemanly thing to do. Instead of, you know, ripping the towel out of her hands and carrying her to the bedroom.
Yeah, gentlemanly.
She didn’t say anything as he stared at the bathroom wall, closing his eyes against the sounds she was making behind him. The soft fibers of the towel rubbing against her skin. Water dripping off her body and landing on the floor. The sight of her bare feet just inches from his.
“You can turn around now,” she told him.
He held his breath and slowly turned just in time to get an eyeful of her left breast before she covered it up. Plump, rosy nipples. Creamy skin. Fuuuuuuck.
“Jesus, Audrey,” he muttered.
“You’ve had your tongue down my throat several times,” she pointed out.
“Yeah, but…” He scrubbed a hand through his hair and willed his fingers to stop trembling. He hadn’t been this worked up since his freshman year of high school when Carly Dowd had given him his first blow job in the backseat of her daddy’s car. He laughed. Actually fucking laughed.
“But what?” she asked innocently as she scrubbed a hand towel over her head.
He gestured toward her barely covered body. “You act like kissing and…this is the same thing.”
She dropped the smaller towel on the counter and clutched the one wrapped around her body tighter. “And what is this?”
“Shit if I know, Audrey,” he admitted. “I came in here to finish our conversation, and you’re…” What was she doing? Really, all she’d been doing was bathing, and he’d intruded on her. “You’re…naked.”
She took a step toward him. “And?”
He narrowed his eyes and gritted his teeth. “Don’t push me.”
Audrey lifted her hand and touched the tension between his eyes. “You take yourself too seriously, Cameron.”
; He grabbed her hand and held her to him, so she wouldn’t have a chance to get away. In the past, he’d been too easy on her, giving her ample opportunity to escape when all he wanted to do was finish what they’d started. Multiple times.
“I’m not letting you run away this time,” he warned.
Her gaze dropped to his mouth.
Without giving himself time to think, or giving Audrey time to hide, he yanked the towel from her and tossed it over his shoulder. He grinned as she gasped, then allowed his gaze to touch every naked inch of her.
Yeah, well worth the wait.
The woman was something of fantasies, like those Greek goddesses who lay around in togas and sip wine all day, then bathed naked in a stream. Her skin was pale and creamy, with full breasts, probably enough for a healthy handful, a pinched waist, and curvy hips. Her legs were long and her small feet were accented by glittery golden nail polish.
His gaze slowly traveled back up her body, lingering on the dark patch of curls at the juncture of her thighs, taking in her small navel, then her puckered nipples. Cameron’s mouth watered at the thought of taking a tight nub in his mouth. He was about to tell her that, to announce everything he intended to do to her, when the look in her eyes stopped him.
She was afraid. Afraid of putting herself out there. Afraid that he’d hurt her.
His gaze softened, and he cupped her face with his hand.
“Do you trust me?” he asked.
She licked her lips, then gave him a small nod. Something inside softened as relief made his knees week.
Without giving her time to reconsider or call the whole thing off, he hooked his hands under the backs of her thighs and hoisted her up.
She yelped and grabbed on to his shoulders.
“This would work a whole lot better if you’d wrap your legs around me,” he told her as he backed out of the bathroom.
Her pupils filled her beautiful brown eyes, and she hooked her legs around his. Cameron didn’t bother biting back a groan as he finally had Audrey’s lush nude body pressed all over his.
“We’re finally finishing this,” he told her as he entered the dark bedroom and kicked the door closed behind him.