by Amelia Grey
Louisa knew His Grace was a scoundrel long before she had ever met him. Still, she didn’t want to believe him capable of deliberately keeping Saint from them. But what other explanation could there be?
She supposed he might just have been too busy to think that Nathan’s sisters would want his pet? The Duke of Drakestone was obviously a powerful and wealthy man. It was safe to assume he always had people demanding his attention, and mountains of work to do to ensure that his managers and overseers took proper care of his estates, properties, horses, and the like. Even Nathan, who had far less lands and fewer companies than the duke, had to give a certain amount of time each month to looking over account books and ledgers, reading correspondence, and meeting with gentlemen about different kinds of businesses.
And perhaps her uncle had to bear part of the blame. He’d sworn to her he looked high and low for Saint, but now she was questioning whether he’d made every possible effort, as he claimed. If her uncle was capable of turning their guardianship over to the duke—and leaving the country without telling her—then no doubt he was capable of stretching the truth about how diligently he had looked for Nathan’s dog.
And now that the heat of the moment had passed and she’d had time to get over the shock of finding Saint alive, she was more inclined to forgive the duke for not trying to get the pet to them. She couldn’t get it out of her mind that although he’d kept his emotions tightly under control, it bothered him when she’d accused him of deliberately keeping the spaniel from them. When Louisa accused His Grace of ignoring Saint as he had her for the past two years, his eyes had twitched slightly.
“Good,” she said out loud. She wanted to know that he felt some guilt or shame or something because Nathan had lost his life.
She couldn’t be too upset with the duke. He had kept Saint safe for them. If he’d been left in the park as she once believed, they would never have seen him again.
Earlier, when Sybil and Bonnie climbed into bed, Saint had jumped up and immediately gone to the foot of the bed and lay down as if he’d been doing it all his life. Of course, he’d done that with Nathan. Louisa couldn’t help but wonder if the duke had let Saint sleep on the foot of his bed, too.
She remembered him saying, “You, I ignored, but I took care of the dog.” And from all appearances, he had. She could see that Saint was well fed and washed often because of his shiny coat.
“So now, Your Grace, I know that you take better care of your dogs than you do young ladies,” she mumbled to herself. “This doesn’t surprise me in the least, given your scandalous reputation and your obvious dislike of small children.”
That was another reason why she couldn’t consider marrying him. Though she did smile and chuckle a little at the thought he might be worried that she would one day actually ask him to marry her. If she ever wanted to put a scare in him, she was sure that a marriage proposal would do it. She was convinced he didn’t want to marry her any more than she wanted to wed him.
Louisa laughed softly to herself again when she thought of how the duke had flinched when Bonnie squealed with high-pitched happiness. She had to admit, Bonnie’s voice seemed to be higher than that of most little girls, and it was ear-piercing, but Louisa was used to it.
He had been completely at a loss for what to do when Bonnie hugged him, and he hadn’t known what to say when Sybil was crying over the dropped music box handle. Obviously he wasn’t used to emotional little girls. He hadn’t had a clue how to handle Sybil’s tears or receive and appreciate Bonnie’s gratitude.
Now that she thought about it, she didn’t think he knew anything about girls.
Louisa knew from her brother and father that men didn’t handle situations the way a female would. They were more stoic and less inclined to show their happiness or sadness, though the duke seemed to be much stiffer around children than any other man she’d ever seen. Whenever Bonnie or any of the sisters had hugged her father and brother, they knew how to accept the girls’ affection and hug them back.
Too, Louisa was having a difficult time sorting out why she felt the way she did whenever the duke was near her. No, he didn’t have to be near her; all she had to do was see him, or just think about him as she was doing right now, and she started feeling strange sensations in parts of her body that had never been awakened before. And during the midst of their heated argument, when once again his face had been so close to hers, why did she have a great urge to feel his lips on hers? That was exasperating—shocking, too. She wasn’t sure she even liked the man. He was impatient, arrogant, and formidable, not to mention overbearing and infuriating.
And he doesn’t like children!
Still, as much as she hated to admit it to herself, there was no denying she was attracted to him. She remembered feeling his breath against her cheek when he’d vehemently denied keeping the dog from them. With a snap, she closed the book and laid it on her lap. She shut her eyes and laid her head against the back of the chair. She wanted to rest, relax, and summon the delicious tingling that swept across her breasts and tightened them whenever he was near.
Oh yes, she wanted to experience that again.
“Sister.”
Louisa jumped. Her eyes popped open and her book fell to the floor even though she immediately recognized Gwen’s voice. Thank goodness she hadn’t been speaking her thoughts out loud. “Gwen, Lillian, I didn’t hear you come belowstairs.”
“We didn’t mean to startle you,” Gwen said, brushing her long, golden hair over her shoulders to her back.
“No, you didn’t,” Louisa said, picking up her book.
“Were you sleeping?”
“Ah, no, I thought you would have been asleep by now. I was just deep in thought about something and not expecting to hear a voice. What are you two doing down here?”
“May we talk with you about something?” Gwen asked.
“Of course.” Louisa put her feet on the floor and said, “Come sit by me and tell me what’s on your mind.”
“I’d rather stand,” Gwen said.
“I’ll stand, too,” Lillian added.
An uneasy feeling washed over Louisa as she stared at her very grown-up-looking sisters in their long white nightrails, their long curls caressing their shoulders. Lillian held her hands behind her back and swung back and forth, fidgeting as was her habit when she was upset about something. Gwen played with the ends of the ribbon that held her gown together, and she sniffed and twitched her nose nervously.
“All right,” Louisa said, feeling the need to rise, too, but she forced herself to remain seated and calm. Something had disturbed them, but what? Was it about Saint, the visit to the duke’s house, or something else? “What do you want to talk about?”
“Is it true you are going to marry the duke and leave us with Mrs. Colthrust?” The words tumbled so quickly from Lillian’s mouth that Louisa wasn’t sure she’d heard her correctly.
“What?” Louisa jumped up.
“You weren’t supposed to just blurt it out like that,” Gwen said, chastising Lillian.
“Well, I want to know if she’s leaving us,” Lillian demanded.
“I do, too,” Gwen argued with her. “But next time, you’d better stick to our plan or I’ll be mad with you.”
“Stop this nonsense,” Louisa said, looking at her bickering sisters. “The answer is no. No, of course that’s not true. Where did you get such an idea as this?”
“When you were reading to Bonnie and Sybil and getting them ready for bed, Mrs. Colthrust came into our room to make sure the dog wasn’t in our room.”
“And she told us,” Lillian said, piping up to finish for Gwen.
“How dare that woman!” Louisa said, wanting to stomp up to Mrs. Colthrust’s bedchamber immediately and take her to task for telling the girls that and scaring them. How dare she meddle in something that was none of her business?
“Tell me everything she said,” Louisa prompted.
“She said she didn’t want Saint sleeping in our
room, because her room is right next to ours. She was afraid she’d hear him whimpering and howling during the night.”
“He doesn’t howl.” Louisa seethed with anger as her hands curled into fists. “She will not dictate where Saint sleeps or anything else. I will speak to her about this tomorrow morning, so consider that settled. Now, what did she have to say about me leaving you?”
Gwen and Lillian looked at each other before Gwen said, “She said that before Nathan died that night of the accident, he made the Duke of Drakestone promise he’d marry you, and that you needed to go ahead and marry him so it would be one less girl for her and Lord Wayebury to take care of.”
“Oh, I can’t believe she said that to you,” Louisa said, her fury rising. “And it’s not as if she is taking care of me or any of you.”
“So it’s not true,” Gwen said.
“No,” Louisa said softly, and then quickly added, “Well, I mean yes. No, only part of it is true.”
“So you are leaving us!” Lillian cried out in distress as tears sprang to her eyes.
“No, I’m not leaving you.” Louisa wrapped her arms around Lillian and hugged her close. Her thin body shook with sobs. Louisa’s heart broke for her sister. First thing tomorrow morning, she and Mrs. Colthrust were going to have a reckoning. Louisa looked over Lillian’s head to Gwen. Thankfully, she didn’t look so upset as her sister. “Hush now. It’s true what Nathan asked of the duke, but I’m not going to marry him.”
“Why won’t you, if that’s what Nathan wanted you to do?” Lillian asked between sobs.
“Yes, Nathan must have had a good reason to do it,” Gwen added.
Louisa could see that both the girls were hurting, and she wanted to take their pain away. Sometimes the whole truth was difficult to explain, but she had to try. She understood their fear. They had lost their mother shortly after Bonnie was born. Their father died less than three years later, and then their brother just over two years ago. It was only natural for them to be upset at the thought of losing her, too.
“Raise your head and look at me, Lillian. Stop crying so you can understand what I’m going to say.”
Lillian sniffled and raised her head. She raked the back of her hand across her damp cheeks, and Louisa brushed tangled curls away from her face.
“First, I would never leave any of you.” Louisa looked at both girls. “You will each marry one day. Gwen, you might even marry this year and leave me, but I will always be here. So that is settled, right?”
They nodded.
“Now, I don’t know everything, as I wasn’t there the night Nathan died, but I’ll tell you what I know.”
The girls sat on one of the settees, but Louisa remained standing. She started at the beginning when she first received the letter from the Duke of Drakestone telling her that he had been with her brother when he was killed in a carriage accident. She left out the duke’s insensitive words saying that Nathan had asked him to marry her, and if after a year of mourning, she thought it might be something she’d want to consider, she should feel free to get in touch with him.
“The duke wrote few words of comfort in his correspondence,” she replied honestly. “They were terse. He said when it was clear Nathan couldn’t recover from his injuries, he had asked that the duke marry me.”
Louisa hated thinking about the afternoon she received the letter from the duke. And it was even days after the duke’s letter arrived that she received one from her uncle saying he was bringing Nathan home for burial. She vowed that day that her sisters were her responsibility and she would take care of them.
“Does the duke want to take care of all of us?” Lillian asked.
“Does he want to?” Louisa repeated her words and studied over them briefly. Deciding to be completely truthful with them, she answered, “Of course not, Lillian. How could he? He doesn’t know us or love us. But he felt honor-bound to offer because Nathan asked him and he agreed. I believe it was unfair of our brother to ask that of him. I’m sure Nathan wanted us to be cared for in the best possible way and he must have felt the duke could do that better than our uncle. But we have been fine and happy without the duke’s help, haven’t we?”
“Yes,” Lillian said, “but if you married him, you would still take care of us, right?”
Louisa smiled, realizing the situation was difficult for her to understand. “I will always take care of you. I am not going to marry the duke, but if I were to marry him or anyone else, it would be under the condition that all my sisters come with me.” She stopped. “You know, I am older and more set in my ways than the rest of you. It may take me longer than either of you to find a husband, but all of you will be with me until the time that you marry and move into your house with your very own husband.”
“Why aren’t you going to marry the duke?” Gwen asked. “He’s very handsome, and who wouldn’t want to marry a duke?”
“The duke deserves the opportunity to choose his own bride. I want to pick my own husband. Just as when the parties and balls start in a few weeks, Gwen, you will want to pick your husband. You won’t let me choose the man you will marry, will you?”
She grinned. “Of course I won’t, so don’t you even try.”
“And you will feel the same way one day, Lillian. And neither did we want Nathan choosing for us whom we should marry. There was a time when a young lady had to wed the person her father or guardian chose for her.” Louisa smiled and touched Lillian’s cheek affectionately. “Not anymore.”
“Why didn’t you ever tell us Nathan asked the duke to marry you?” Gwen asked.
“I felt you were both too young to know.”
“We’re not children anymore, Louisa,” Gwen said, looking and sounding very grown up.
“I know that now, but Nathan died over two years ago. You had just turned sixteen—and, Lillian, you weren’t even thirteen yet. Besides, it was a halfhearted proposal from the duke that I never took seriously anyway. I knew he was hoping I wouldn’t hold him to his promise. And I haven’t. Not agreeing to marry him was the right thing to do.”
“Why didn’t you tell me before I turned eighteen?” Gwen asked. “You think I’m old enough to marry, but I’m not old enough to know any details about my sister’s life or my brother’s death.”
Even Louisa didn’t know any more information about Nathan’s death. When she’d questioned her uncle about that night, he told her there was no need going into particulars that wouldn’t change the outcome of the fact that Nathan was gone. At the time, she was too shocked to argue with him.
“You are being too hard concerning this, Gwen,” Louisa said. “I only received that one letter from the duke. When I didn’t hear from him again, I thought he had forgotten all about what Nathan asked him to do. I was as shocked as anyone when he came to see me yesterday. I realize now that you both are old enough to know.”
“Thank you for realizing that,” Gwen said.
“I also should have realized that even if Mrs. Colthrust hadn’t told you tonight, someone would have eventually. After all, you are going to be meeting hundreds of people at parties and balls over the course of the Season. From what Mrs. Colthrust has told me, the vow between Nathan and the duke is still talked about all over London. It was only a matter of time until you heard.”
“You can’t shield us from everything, Louisa, though I know you try.”
Gwen was right but it wasn’t easy to let go of the control she’d had these seven years. “So tell me, can you forgive me for not telling you?”
“Of course,” Lillian said, and hugged Louisa.
Louisa knew that Gwen wasn’t ready to forgive her yet, so she added a little more prompting and said, “I should have told you about this when it happened. I’m sorry I didn’t.”
Gwen smiled and threw herself into Louisa’s arms and hugged her tightly. It was amazing what a simple “I’m sorry” could accomplish.
“You know all is forgiven,” Gwen said, “but next time someone thinks about marryi
ng you, will you please tell us?”
“I promise I will,” she said, feeling much better now that she’d managed to avert a huge crisis. It was also time to change the subject, so she said, “Now, I don’t know about you, but I’m getting excited about your first ball.”
“Our first ball,” Gwen reminded her.
Louisa nodded. She didn’t know when Gwen had become such a capable young lady. “Why don’t we work on our dancing tomorrow? We haven’t danced since we’ve been here, and it’s always so much fun.”
“I’d like that,” Gwen said.
“I can play the pianoforte for you while you dance like I did when we were at home,” Lillian offered.
“That would be lovely,” Louisa answered.
“Except for the fact that Mrs. Colthrust doesn’t like to hear you play the pianoforte,” Gwen said with a smirk.
Lillian smiled. “She doesn’t like to hear Saint bark either.”
“Or Bonnie squeal,” Louisa added.
The three sisters looked at each other and laughed.
A quick flash of relief washed over Louisa, and she felt as if a great weight had flown off her shoulders.
“Now, both of you young ladies give me another hug, and then back up to bed you go.”
A few minutes later, the girls were gone and Louisa picked up her book and settled back onto the comfortable chair. Everything was going to be all right between her and her sisters. If only she felt so confident that everything was going to be all right between her and the duke, now that he was their guardian. It was a horrible thing for her uncle to have done to them.
Louisa curled her feet under her once more. She closed her eyes and laid her head back against the front of the chair. The handsome duke paraded into her mind, looking so tall, so handsome, and so appealing. How could she be so attracted to him and so infuriated by him at the same time? What could she do to banish him from her thoughts?