Mrs. Moskin nodded, and her voice was warm. “Thank you, Fiona. I’ve always felt rather that way about it myself.” She smiled and walked off.
“Well,” Abby said, “if I was psychic, I’d predict an A in our immediate future.”
“Kathy already predicted that, remember?”
“Ha ha.” Abby grinned at me. “So how are things going with her?”
I made a face. “She’s okay, I guess, but I’d still rather she wasn’t around.”
“Is she around a lot?”
“Mmm. Yeah. But she and Dad have been doing their own thing more. They’re not dragging me and Caitlin into it as much, so that’s something.”
“Caitlin is going to have some serious issues. I hope Kathy’s putting some money aside for therapy for her. Imagine having a mom who talked to your dead sister all the time.”
Even though I didn’t think Kathy’s conversations with Nicole were real, there was a part of me that envied her. Sometimes I thought if I could just talk to Mom for five minutes, maybe she could tell me how to cope without her. “Caitlin’s not so bad, actually,” I admitted. “We’ve started talking a bit. She’s smarter than she looks.”
Abby gave an exaggerated gasp of shock. “Wait a minute. Did I hear that right? Are you sticking up for Caitlin?”
“Cut it out, Abby. I’m just saying…”
“I know. I’m just giving you a hard time. So does Caitlin believe the same stuff as her mom?”
“I guess so. She sort of has to, doesn’t she? For now, anyway.” I looked at Abby. “What about you? Do you believe it?”
Abby shrugged. “At first I was kind of convinced by what Kathy said about Gran, but the more I thought about it, the less convinced I was. So now I don’t know. I guess I mostly don’t believe it, but I don’t completely disbelieve it either. It’s like—what did you say Tom and your dad were? Agnostic?”
“Yeah.” That reminded me of something. “Hey, you know what Dad said?”
“What?”
“He said that Kathy being psychic was the same as you being Christian.”
“Um, hardly!” Abby looked startled. “Tell me you’re kidding.”
“No, no.” I rushed to explain. “Not that you and Kathy believe the same things. I think his point was more that you and I don’t share the same religious views but we get along fine. So in his mind, I should be able to accept Kathy’s beliefs and get along with her too.”
She shrugged. “Well, I’m not that religious.”
“But you go to that Christian camp and you go to church every week.”
“Duh. My parents would flip if I didn’t. Anyway, camp’s fun.” She looked thoughtful. “It’s true though. I guess I do believe in God, and you don’t.”
“And it doesn’t matter.”
“No,” Abby agreed. “It doesn’t matter.” She grinned at me. “You’re stuck with me, Fiona. Sorry about that.”
I grinned back. “I have to put up with you. You’re the best therapist I’ve ever had.”
“Aren’t I the only one?”
“Uh, yeah. That explains it,” I said, and Abby elbowed me in the ribs. Hard.
A few minutes later, the Mouse was back with a piece of paper in her hand. “Congratulations, you two,” she said. “Very well done indeed.” She handed us the paper. Good work, it read. A thoughtful exploration of an interesting question. Nicely presented, but remember to reference your sources properly. And beneath that: a big red B+.
Abby scowled, but I couldn’t help it: I burst out laughing.
After school I rode my bike down to the marina. I hadn’t been there since Sunday. Dad hadn’t exactly forbidden me to go there and I hadn’t asked. Mostly I hadn’t asked because I was pretty sure he’d say no.
I coasted down the long slope toward the marina and waited for the first glimpse of masts and water. There. My heart lifted. The sky was a soft gray, and there was almost no wind at all. It was warm and damp, and the air felt heavy, as if it was just waiting to rain. I turned into the parking lot and jumped off at the bike racks.
A few people nodded to me as I walked along the dock, and I wondered if they’d heard about what I did. Mom always used to say that this marina was worse than a high school for gossip. I nodded back and hurried past them toward E-dock.
But Eliza J was gone.
There was another boat in our slip—a narrow-beamed, dark-hulled sailboat—and Eliza J was gone.
I walked to the end of the dock and stared out toward the horizon. Mount Baker was hidden in clouds, and the water was the same color as the sky. I fingered the key in my pocket, wondering who had bought Eliza J and what they were like. I wondered where she’d be sailing this summer and all the summers after this. It was so strange to think of Eliza J having adventures without Mom and me.
I thought about what Joni had said: There will be other boats. I knew it was true, but no other boat would take the place of Eliza J. I took the key out of my pocket and rubbed my fingers over it until the metal was warm in my hand. Then I lifted my arm and threw the key as hard as I could, in a great soaring arc over the water. It disappeared without a sound.
“Goodbye,” I whispered.
I stood there for a long time, just watching the water and the misty gray horizon.
Someday I would sail again. Someday I would sail all the way around the world. I didn’t know when, and I didn’t know how, and I didn’t know if Dad would ever be able to accept it, but I knew one thing for sure: the sea would wait for me.
acknowledgments
Over the last three years, many of my good friends have read various drafts of this novel and given me thoughtful feedback. My endlessly supportive family has provided encouragement, insight and the gift of time to write. And my fabulous editor, Sarah Harvey, worked her magic and improved the novel tremendously. I am very grateful to all of you. I would also like to thank the British Columbia Arts Council for their generous support during the writing of this novel.
ROBIN STEVENSON is the author of nine novels for children and teens, including Impossible Things and A Thousand Shades of Blue. She lives in Victoria and spends most of her time writing, reading, playing games with her six-year-old son and scheming about ways to spend more time in hotter, sunnier places. Visit her website at www.robinstevenson.com.
Liars and Fools Page 16