by Laura DeLuca
After putting in her daily hours at the college post office, Rebecca met with Megan for a quick cup of coffee. Megan had gotten her in the habit of drinking something hot on their way to practice. It helped relax their throat muscles before they sang. Even though Rebecca had one of the smaller roles, she also had to sing with the chorus line. So anything to help keep her voice in key and Professor Carter off her back was a plus. The girls grabbed their coffee to-go so they wouldn’t be late for practice and enjoyed the scenery as they walked. With fall in full swing, the woodsy campus was a canopy of leaves the color of the sunset. It was wonderful strolling along and breathing in the fresh, crisp mountain air. Rebecca pushed her bike with one hand and kept a precarious grip on the coffee with the other as they strolled along, all the while attempting to keep up with Megan’s speed talking.
“I am just so happy!” Megan gushed. “I don’t think I’ve ever felt this way about a guy before. I mean, I never really had a boyfriend. Well, not a real one anyway. A few casual things here and there, like to prom or homecoming, but never anything serious.”
Rebecca was so surprised, she almost dropped the coffee she had just put to her lips. “Really? You’re so pretty. I find it hard to believe the guys in high school didn’t throw themselves at you in droves.”
Megan giggled. “If they had, I wouldn’t have noticed. Ever since I was eight years old, all I cared about was music. I studied piano, violin, even the harp, and of course vocals. I practiced for hours and hours every day, all with the hopes of getting here someday. Now that I made it, I finally feel like I can breathe a little and maybe have a little fun. Honestly, sometimes I think my life wasn’t all that different from Johanna’s. I spent all those years locked out of sight. Except, in my case, it was my own choice. No one forced me to do it. Either way, I feel like a sheltered, naïve adolescent compared to most of the girls on this campus.”
“I don’t think you’re naïve, at least no more than I am. But it does sound like you deserve to have a little fun.” Rebecca felt guilty that she had slipped into the school almost by accident, when like so many others, Megan had to work so hard. “I have to admit, I respect your passion and your resolve. Not many kids would have been so devoted. Most don’t even have any clue what they want to do with their lives by the time they graduate from high school, let alone when they’re only eight.”
“Oh, you’d be surprised,” Megan declared. “Here, everyone is like that. Only the really gifted people stand out though. Sometimes I’m a nervous wreck, wondering if I’ll have what it takes to make it on the stage or even in the orchestra. But for now, I’m going to go with the flow and try not to get too stressed out over it. So,” she added as she sipped her latte, “speaking of gifted people, I want to hear all about you and Justyn. Was it love at first sight? If such a thing is possible, it would probably happen to you two. I’ve never seen a couple so completely in-tune with each other, and I don’t mean just on the stage.”
Rebecca laughed. “No, it wasn’t really love at first sight. Or maybe it was…I don’t know. I was actually a little scared of him at first. And then there was Tom….” Rebecca gave Megan the summarized account on their real-life version of Phantom. But she left out the part about Debbie. Even a year later, she still had a hard time reliving that nightmare.
“Wow, that’s some story!” Megan exclaimed, her eyes wide. “But at least the Opera Ghost got his happy ending. Phantom fans everywhere would appreciate that!”
“Yeah, it was a magical experience.” Rebecca’s fingers instinctively went toward the ammonite necklace Justyn had given her. “I really didn’t expect it to be the same in college, but I miss being his co-star. In Demon Barber I only get about ten seconds on stage with him. And then he’s either cursing at me or killing me.”
Megan chuckled. “I suppose that is a little anti-climactic after the passion between Erik and Christine. But hey, at least you have intermission. And of course, you get to take him home.”
“I know you’re right, and as much as I hate to admit it, Justyn and Livy are both perfect for their roles.” Rebecca sighed as she locked her bike to the rack. “I could never be as realistic as she is if I were the one playing Mrs. Lovatt.”
“Don’t sound so depressed about it. It’s a good thing that you’re not as nasty as Livy.”
Megan put her arm around her as they walked through the doors of the theater. Most of the cast, as well as Professor Carter, were already in attendance. They weren’t late, and so he didn’t say a word to them, but Rebecca still had the feeling he was annoyed. She exchanged nervous glances with Megan as they dropped their bags off at their lockers. Afterward, they wasted no time hustling onto the stage and getting into position. Justyn winked at her from the corner behind the curtain where he was chatting with Frankie and Quinn. Before she had a chance to greet him, the orchestra was already tuning, and she knew she wouldn’t be talking to him until after practice.
Rehearsal proceeded without incident. Somehow, it was always a relief to make it through a whole run-through without any near-death experiences. After talking with Megan about Phantom, she couldn’t help but remember curtains crashing, mirrors shattering, bodies hanging. She shuddered at the memories. But they had been in college for over a month and practicing for nearly as long, and thankfully, there were no signs of any real-life Sweeney Todds threatening to slit her throat. It really was just a play. But it was a play she wasn’t the star of, and that was something Professor Carter reminded her of on a daily basis.
“Miss Hope,” he called just as they were packing up their newly acquired props for the night, “can I speak to you for a moment?”
“Good luck, Jerseylicious.”
Scott snickered and retreated behind the stage just as Rebecca stepped down to face the director. Her heart started to hammer as she waited for him to finish zipping up his briefcase. As she waited, she watched Livy pass off a half dozen pizza boxes to Frankie and Chad. Frankie couldn’t help but burst into song at the coincidence. In the play, it was Frankie’s job to serve the customers in Mrs. Lovett’s pie shop. In real life it just happened to be pizza pies instead of meat pies he was getting ready to hand out.
“Want a warm and tasty treat? Something savory for you to eat?
Want to sample the best pies in the land?
Put one of Mrs. Lovatt’s pies in your hand.
Sure to please when you take a bite. Aint that pie a lovely sight?”
Chad and Livy joined in, and Rebecca heard the song echoing off the high ceilings long after they disappeared behind the curtain where the rest of the troupe was undoubtedly waiting. The whole cast and crew had gotten into the habit of ordering takeout after rehearsal. It saved time. And in the hustle and bustle of college life, especially this college where extracurricular activities were just as important as actual classes, every second counted. Rebecca watched the remaining actors scoot after the food, but she had lost her appetite. Professor Carter was studying her with his arms crossed and a frown on his face. Rebecca felt so self-conscious she had to cast down her eyes.
“You wanted to see me, Professor Carter?” she asked when what seemed like several long minutes passed in silence.
“Yes, Miss Hope. I would like to talk to you about your performance. As you know, the first show is only six weeks away, and with ten shows already lined up, I simply can’t settle for second best. Do you understand what I’m saying to you, Miss Hope?”
Rebecca shook her head. “I’m sorry, sir, but I really don’t understand. Did I do something wrong?”
“Wrong? Miss Hope, my dear, you seldom do anything right. You’re a bag of nerves on the stage. You’re stiff and unnatural. It would be obvious to even the most unpracticed eye that you just don’t like your role. Do you like your role, Rebecca?”
“Well … yes … yes, of course, P-Professor.” Rebecca stuttered. “I’m honored that you chose me at all.”
He sighed in exasperation. “Why do I hear a but in there?”
> “I just feel a little self-conscious about some of the lines,” Rebecca admitted. She blushed when she thought about how she had to jack her skirt up and tell Quinn he had a “nice big log to stoke her fire.”
Professor Carter sighed. He almost rolled his eyes, but not quite. “Miss Hope, you will find that in the real world, people are crude. Life is not all pretty romances and soft-spoken words of love. There is darkness. There is death. And there is sex. Art reflects real life in all its aspects, from the most beautiful to the most repulsive. It is the actor’s job to take the ugliness in man’s nature and transform it into art. If you are serious about becoming an actress, Rebecca, you will have to broaden your horizons. You cannot always play the witless damsel, no matter how fitting that role may be. While I admit, your voice is exquisite, it is not enough to ensure you a spot in this production. If you are unable to improve your performance, your role will go to your understudy.”
“No, please, Professor Carter!” Rebecca held her head up, feigning a confidence she didn’t feel. Who said she couldn’t act? “I can do this,” she told him. “I will do this.”
Professor Carter nodded. “That’s a good girl.” Rebecca almost expected him to pat her head like a dog. “I know that it’s a long-standing joke that I like to pick on the freshmen. But this is a harsh business, and a Broadway director will be a much tougher critic than I.”
“I understand.” Rebecca adjusted her bag on her shoulder. “I appreciate you taking the time to talk to me.”
“Very good.” He picked up his briefcase and waved her away nonchalantly. “You may go.”
Rebecca nodded and made like she was heading for the stage. It was only after she was certain Professor Carter wasn’t looking that she ran toward the restrooms instead. When she was sure she was alone, she locked herself inside one of the stalls, sank down to the ground, and finally let herself cry.
Chapter Nine
Rebecca wasn’t sure how long she sat on the floor of the stall with tears streaming down her cheeks. It felt like forever. Eventually, she collected herself enough to rise up from the ground. When she emerged, she stared at her reflection in the Victorian-style mirror that hung over the dainty white sinks. The theater bathroom had recently been given an elaborate makeover to give it more of an old-world charm. There were circular cushioned seats in the center room, surrounded by sparkling walls decorated with ceramic bows and flowers. Standing amongst such splendor in just her jeans and pullover made Rebecca feel as out of place in the bathroom as she did in the rest of the school. She wasn’t an eccentric, talented actor who could do no wrong on the stage, like Justyn and Livy. She wasn’t super-model beautiful like Megan and Quinn. She certainly wasn’t a genius like Frankie. Even Chad and Scott had the obnoxious attitude of future stars. Rebecca was just plain and boring. She had been insane to think she had what it took to make it in this world where nothing less than perfection was accepted.
“Get ahold of yourself, Becca,” she told herself. “This is nothing compared to the things you’ve been through.”
Saying it out loud didn’t make her feel any better. However, she knew she couldn’t hide in the bathroom forever. So Rebecca splashed a little water on her face and dried off with a rough paper towel that made her skin look even blotchier than it already was. There wasn’t much she could do about it, even though the last thing she wanted was for Livy to see her looking like a teary-eyed mess. She doubted the Gothic queen ever shed a tear off the stage. If she did, her eyes probably dripped pure blood.
The thought made Rebecca giggle in spite of herself, and after one last glance in the mirror, she headed back out to the theater. She assumed Justyn and the others would all be enjoying their impromptu dinner backstage. But as she headed toward the large velvet curtains, she started to wonder if Professor Carter had decided they needed a little more practice. She was sure she heard singing. As she drew closer and could distinguish the words, she realized a whole chorus of voices was belting out lines that were meant as a solo for Livy. Lines about how disgusting Mrs. Lovatt thought her own pies were before she started using human flesh as the secret ingredient.
“Revolting as they can possibly be.
The worst pies in the city, as ya surely will see.
Stale and greasy, hard as a rock.
Don’t break a tooth or go into shock.”
In the play, Mrs. Lovatt sings the song to Sweeney Todd when he first shows up in her shop. At the moment, it seemed the whole cast was participating in a sing-along. But Rebecca recognized Justyn’s melodious tenor overpowering all the others. Boisterous bouts of laughter were mixed in with the slightly off-key notes and the occasional fuddle of lines as the cast and crew tried to follow along with dialogue that wasn’t their own.
When Rebecca peeked behind the curtains, the first thing she saw was Justyn and Livy waving their pizza slices in the air. Livy even had her arm around him as they swayed back and forth along with the music. Rebecca tried to ignore the ridiculous surge of jealousy she felt at seeing them duetting together. She knew Justyn wasn’t interested in Livy. Still, if she had a pie handy she would have happily shoved it down Livy’s throat.
“Nothin’ in the center but grease and goo.
With no meat to be had, what can I do?
Take just one bite; you’ll see that it’s true.
The worst pies in the city, I’m tellin’ you.”
They had just finished the chorus when Justyn noticed Rebecca standing in the corner. He tossed his veggie pizza down on a paper plate and jogged over to her with a smile on his face. She met him halfway, and he gave her a kiss on the cheek. The rest of the singing instantly transformed to hushed chatter and scattered laughter with the departure of the obvious ringleader. Most of the kids were still giggling over their food, but Livy looked unmistakably annoyed by the interruption and tossed her untouched pizza down as well. Rebecca didn’t care. She wasn’t in the mood for Livy’s nonsense.
“What’s going on?” Rebecca asked. “I could hear you screeching all the way at the end of the theater.”
Justyn shrugged, unoffended. “Nothing, really. This pizza we ordered is just really terrible, and enjoying irony as I do, I just couldn’t resist pointing out the similarity to the play. Which, of course, led to everyone singing the Worst Pies in the City.”
“That’s so corny.” Rebecca rolled her eyes, but she kind of wished she had been a part of the fun. She felt even more like an outsider. She also hoped there’d be some pizza left, even if it was terrible. She hadn’t had anything to eat since breakfast, and she suddenly realized she was starving. But based on the fact that the empty boxes were strewn across the floor, she had to assume the food was gone already.
Justyn noticed her glance. “Don’t worry, I saved you a slice.”
That made Rebecca feel a little better. Justyn always thought about her. It reminded her of how lucky she was. Most teenage guys wouldn’t be nearly as considerate, especially where food was concerned. He walked over to grab the paper plate that he had left sitting beside Livy. But before he could reach it, Scott snatched it up and shoved the whole thing into his mouth in two large bites. He smirked at them as he wiped pizza sauce from his chin with the sleeve of his shirt.
“You snooze, you lose.”
“It’s okay.” Rebecca put a restraining hand on Justyn’s shoulder when she saw his posture tense. “I’m really not that hungry anyway.”
“Someone needs to teach that barbarian some table manners. He’s a….” He stopped in midsentence and narrowed his eyes to look at her a little closer in the dim light, Scott instantly forgotten. “Hey, have you been crying?”
She opened her mouth, not even sure how she was going to reply. The last thing she wanted was to rehash the details of her meeting with the director, especially not when Livy was within hearing distance. Luckily, she was spared from having to give Justyn a lengthy explanation because Megan bounced over to join them. As usual, Quinn wasn’t far behind. He just stopped along
the way to dump his pizza crust in the nearest trashcan.
“Scott said P.C. called you away.” Megan put her arm around Rebecca. “Everything okay?”
Rebecca sighed. “Yeah. He just told me I need to loosen up a little. Apparently, I’m not quite slutty enough for him.”
Quinn chuckled. “Don’t worry about Crater Face,” he told her. “You’re doing great—just enough sluttiness without crossing the border to outright hooker.”
“I thought you were fabulous,” Justyn agreed, more seriously. “I really can’t imagine what P.C. is complaining about.”
“You’re a little biased,” Rebecca reminded him, but she was grateful for the encouragement.
“No, Becca, really,” Megan argued. “You did everything right. Your voice is fantastic, and you make Lucy seem funny and pathetic all at once.”
Rebecca couldn’t help but grumble a little. “That’s me, laughable and pathetic.”
“Oh seriously,” Megan continued, “it’s not easy to pull off that kind of combination on the stage. Not just any actress can do it. Really, you were great. I have no idea why Professor Carter is always picking on you.”