by Laura DeLuca
The stage was set with the glorious backdrop of a painted dock. The water was shadowed with only a slight glimmer of moonlight touching its surface. Like everything else in the grisly musical drama, the scenery had to be dark. Even though they were still in their plain clothes, Justyn and Quinn both embodied their respective characters. Quinn, playing the young, bright-eyed sailor, was staring out into the crowd with a happy, boyish grin, singing in his resounding tenor about his joyous return to London. Then Justyn picked up the song in much darker, deeper tones, and with words that seemed to have more meaning to him now than they had on any of the previous occasions he had sung them.
“London is a place where civil men are few.
They devour all that’s good with the crap they spew.
‘Til there’s nothing left but hate and greed.
And only the corrupt can possibly succeed.”
Rebecca couldn’t possibly see how Professor Carter could have a problem with Justyn’s performance that day. He managed to look completely disinterested in the world around him, yet completely furious, all at the same time. He stood still as a statue, with no expression on his face, yet the anger and the absolute loathing for the world was clearly visible in his eyes and in the heated tremble of his voice. He always did have a splendidly brooding stage presence, especially when his own emotions mirrored those of the character he portrayed. It was a horribly beautiful and truly chilling performance.
“Hey.”
Rebecca jumped almost ten feet in the air when someone placed a hand on her shoulder. When she turned and saw it was only Megan, she settled down. It was nice to see she still had at least one friend. It was actually Megan’s first day back since the incident with the pizza. Of the whole cast, she had been hit the hardest by the food poisoning and had been laid up for days. She still looked a little pale, but it only made her seem that much more in character with the ivory-skinned Johanna.
“It’s good to see you’re back,” Rebecca whispered as they waited behind the stage for their turn to go on. “How are you feeling?”
“I’m fine,” Megan said with a wave of her hand, giving Rebecca that tentative, nervous look everyone seemed to be giving her. “How are you?”
“Okay, I guess.”
“Liar.” Megan accused.
Rebecca sighed. “You’re right. I’m a basket case.”
Megan put her arm around her. “It’s okay, you know. You’re allowed to be upset about what happened. Honestly, I don’t know how you’re coping at all.”
“I’m not coping,” Rebecca admitted. “I’m just existing. I’m not sure if that’s the same thing.”
“Listen, Quinn is having a huge party at his frat house tomorrow,” Megan told her. “The whole cast is going to be there. Why don’t you and Justyn come too? Maybe it will cheer you up a little. At the very least, it might take your mind off things.”
Rebecca wasn’t sure how a room full of strangers getting drunk and being obnoxious was going to help her make her feel better. Especially when she might completely freak out if someone accidently bumped into her.
“I don’t know—” she started.
“Oh, come on, Bec!” Megan interrupted. “Do it for me? If you don’t come, I’ll be left all alone with Livy, and … oops! I’m up!”
Megan dashed out onto the stage where Quinn was waiting just seconds before Professor Carter’s eyes bulged out of his head. Rebecca watched from the sidelines, hidden behind the heavy curtains, as their characters made plans to elope and cried out “Oh, won’t you just kiss me?” at the end of every refrain. When they finally did embrace at the close of the song, Rebecca could tell it wasn’t feigned. Love was definitely budding between Megan and Quinn. Despite her own woes, Rebecca was happy for her friend. But it was obvious not everyone felt that way. Chad and Scott were too wrapped up in themselves to notice Rebecca was standing there as they made their way to the stage, but before they stepped out, Rebecca couldn’t help but overhear them talking.
“That bitch is smokin’ hot, isn’t she?” Scott asked.
Rebecca could only assume he meant Megan since they were salivating as they watched her perform. Not unlike how Judge Turpin and Beadle looked with so much longing upon the sweet and innocent Johanna. Really, if not for the modern-day slang they used, she might have thought their conversation was part of the show.
Chad shrugged. “She sounds a little too much like Minnie Mouse, but I guess she’s okay. I’d bang her. But she’s too whiny for more than just a quickie.”
Rebecca had no idea how they didn’t hear her grunt with disgust.
“I don’t know what she sees in that skinny twerp,” Scott continued. “I might just have to make a play for her at the party tomorrow night. You’ll see. I’ll get a piece of that ass. Whether she likes it or not.”
That was all she heard before they took their place in the limelight. Rebecca shook her head a few times, still unsure how such awful people could come wrapped in such appealing packages. After they moved on, she stepped a little further back into the curtains, enjoying her spot in the shadows. She wasn’t in the next act, and she wanted to stay hidden as long as possible so she wouldn’t have to talk to anyone. She did such a good job of making herself invisible that Livy and Justyn didn’t notice her there as they approached the sidelines to wait for their next scene to begin. Yet Rebecca could see them clearly and hear every word they said. At first, Livy was just complaining about Frankie messing up some of his lines. Justyn didn’t even seem to be listening. As she babbled, he flinched and put a hand on his shoulder. When Livy noticed him grimace, she actually shut up and looked him over with honest concern.
“What’s wrong, Justyn? You haven’t been yourself lately.”
He shrugged. “Nothing, really. My shoulder just bothers me sometimes. I have an old … injury that acts up.”
“Well, maybe I can help with that.”
Livy walked up beside Justyn and licked her black lips as her hands slid across his neck and shoulders in the most sensual way possible. She made sure to lean against him so her above-average breasts brushed against his elbow. From her spot behind the curtain, Rebecca balled her hands into fists. She hated seeing someone else put their hands on Justyn, especially Livy. Especially when it was obviously more than just a friendly gesture. Yet it still wasn’t enough to make her come out of her hiding spot. Luckily, Justyn didn’t seem any more comfortable with Livy’s advances than Rebecca was. He shrugged her hands away before she could even attempt a massage and backed up a few steps.
“I appreciate the offer, but it’s actually really sensitive. Only Becca can really help when it’s like this.”
Livy wasn’t so easily persuaded when it came to something she wanted. “Well, Becca isn’t around right now. But I am, and believe it or not, I can be gentle.” She gave him a wicked smile. “Though I must admit—there are some things that I prefer a little rough.”
She moved closer to him again, but when she tried to touch him, Justyn knocked her hands away. “I told you I’m not interested, all right? Just back off!”
“Geesh,” Livy said with a small pout. “I was just trying to help. You don’t have to be so mean.”
Rebecca heard the expert catch in her voice. She saw the actress’s eyes well with phony waterworks. She was playing the role of the wounded damsel on the verge of tears to perfection. It was a role a sweetheart like Justyn could never ignore.
“I’m sorry,” he apologized and rubbed his eyes. “I didn’t mean to snap at you. I’m just tired, and my head is pounding. I haven’t been sleeping much lately.”
Livy laughed sarcastically. “Imagine that. I never pictured your sweet little Becca to be the type of vixen who keeps her man up all hours of the night in the throes of passion.”
“Very funny.” He was getting annoyed again. “Actually, I’ve been sleeping on the sofa. Just until Becca feels better about what happened.”
“Are you kidding me?” Livy sneered. “She’s making you
sleep on the sofa when she knows you have a bum shoulder ? Sheesh. That’s really selfish.”
Justyn shook his head and played with the ammonite pendant around his neck. “She’s not making me do anything. I volunteered. She just needs a little space.”
“Poor little thing,” Livy sang, quoting the play.
“It’s not a joke, Livy,” Justyn told her. “What happened to Becca … it’s really awful.”
“Really?” Livy didn’t sound very sympathetic. “I heard she got away.”
“That doesn’t mean it wasn’t traumatic. I can’t even begin to imagine what she’s going though, and—”
“Oh, poor dear,” Livy interrupted in her most sarcastic sing-song voice. “Poor little thing.”
Justyn shook his head. “I don’t know why I’m even bothering to tell you any of this.” He sounded disgusted.
Rebecca felt a little repulsed as well, but she wasn’t sure if it was with Livy or with herself. Some of what the Gothic girl had said rang true. Though, of course, there were more tasteful ways of saying it. Rebecca had never even considered what sleeping on the cramped loveseat would do to Justyn’s bad shoulder. She really was a selfish brat.
“You’re telling me because I’m your friend,” Livy told him, sounding serious and sincere for the first time since the conversation started. “And apparently you need a friend right now, since you’re silly little brat of a girlfriend doesn’t know how good she has it.”
“Really, Livy? I would expect this type of reaction from Scott or Chad, but you’re a woman. Can’t you put yourself in her place for just a minute? Don’t you have any compassion?”
Livy snorted and threw her hands up in the air. “Well, excuuuusssse me, Justyn! I’m sorry that I’m not feeling all sorry for your pretty little girlfriend. But you know what? I worked my ass off for years to get my scholarship. My mom was dead and my dad ran off before I was born, so I did it all alone while I lived with my lush aunt who wouldn’t have even noticed if I came home or not. Becca just had a scholarship handed to her after one lucky performance. I’m not jealous, you know. It just makes me sick that she doesn’t appreciate what she has and goes around sulking with that ‘poor me’ attitude when she was everything she could ever want. She has you, and she doesn’t even appreciate that. If she can’t learn to be grateful for what she has, she should step aside and let a real woman have a chance at making you happy!”
Justyn shook his head. “Wow, Livy, I didn’t realize you’ve been through so much….”
“You don’t know the half of it!” Livy snapped, and for a moment her black lips curled into an angry sneer.
“But,” Justyn continued, unfazed, “I don’t see Becca the way you do. I love her. That isn’t going to change. So, I’m sorry, but whatever you think is going to happen between us … it just won’t.”
“Oh, grow up, would you! High school sweethearts don’t ever last in the real world. And you’re way too good for that little snit.” Livy started toward the stage for her next scene, looking disgusted, but at the last second, she turned back. She reached out a hand with perfectly manicured black nails and stroked Justyn’s cheek. “If you ever want a real woman, one who would never even consider kicking you out of her bed, give me a call.”
Justyn watched Livy just a little too intently as she glided onto the stage, beautiful and regal in her lace corset and skirt. He followed shortly afterward, and Rebecca had to wonder if he wasn’t considering her proposition. He did seem more intent on her as they waltzed through the wickedly funny pie-making scene. Rebecca had pushed him away so many times over the last few days, how could she blame him for being tempted by such a beguiling seductress? Even the cold and callous Sweeney Todd had sought a warm body in his bed, which he found in Mrs. Lovatt.
Rebecca watched them together on stage, and it certainly seemed as though something were growing between the actors as well as the characters they portrayed. Before long, the scenes changed again, and Livy and Justyn were sitting in Mrs. Lovatt’s cozy foyer. She was singing to him about her plans to visit the seashore. As her instrumental backup, she had the cheerful piano keys and the sound of the flute creating a high-pitched screech meant to stimulate a seagull’s squawk. Though Sweeney Todd was supposed to sit with only indifference on his face, as Livy’s hands explored Justyn’s stiff body, as her breath tickled the bare skin of his neck, there was definitely something more than indifference flickering in his eyes.
“Someday I’d love to go away to the shore.
Walk the boardwalk and stroll with you, mi amour.
At night I would struggle beside you in bed.
Perhaps one day we could even wed.
Just imagine us two in marital bliss.
Come now, Mr.T, give your mistress a kiss.”
Livy leaned in and prepared to kiss Justyn as the lyrics implied. Normally, she just brushed him on the cheek. She took everyone by surprise, especially Justyn, when she pressed her full lips against his. It wasn’t just a peck either. It was a real kiss. A demanding and passionate embrace. Her arms entwined around him, and her hands ran through his dark hair. Justyn squirmed a little in her grasp, but she only pulled him closer. After a while, he really didn’t even try to push her away anymore. He gave in. Maybe he even enjoyed it. At least that’s how it seemed from the vantage point where Rebecca was hiding behind the stage. She wiped away the tears as she watched the scene unfold. She realized she might be losing him forever, and wondered if she deserved any less.
Chapter Sixteen
That night, Justyn desperately tried to talk to her about what happened with Livy. He swore up and down he hadn’t wanted her to kiss him. He claimed he tried to push her away, but she made it impossible to do so without hurting her. Rebecca didn’t really doubt him. She wasn’t even sure if she was angry or not. She just knew she wasn’t ready to talk about it. When she got home, she told him she wasn’t feeling well and spent the rest of the night quietly sobbing in the darkness of their bedroom. A few times Justyn cracked open the door and peeked in. Each time, she feigned sleep and he would click the door shut again with a heavy sigh.
The next day, her eyes were sore and swollen and her head was pounding, but she still made sure to sneak out to her first class before Justyn stirred. She noticed his long legs dangling off the small loveseat at an odd angle, and she felt a distinct pang of guilt, but she still slipped quietly from the apartment without saying a word. She didn’t have to face him again until rehearsal, and even then she lingered outside the building until a few seconds before practice officially began so he wouldn’t have time to catch her. She knew she was being awful to him. But she was just so overwhelmed with fear, with pain, and even insecurity. She didn’t know how to make him understand the feelings she couldn’t explain to herself. She couldn’t help but think maybe Livy was right. Maybe Justyn would be better off without Rebecca. It was obvious Livy had no qualms about communication or intimacy.
Rebecca was overcome with so many conflicting emotions it was no surprise her acting was off. Her voice cracked each time she tried to get the words past the lump in her throat. Professor Carter must have still felt sorry for her, because he didn’t say anything, but his eyes narrowed more than once. There were even a few times she swore she saw him flinch. When he got up to go on a coffee break, she had to wonder if he was just looking for an excuse to get away before he decided to strangle her.
The director instructed them to continue in his absence. Despite her anxiety, Rebecca tried to struggle through the performance. She soon found herself in the ballroom scene. It was the only part of the play where she would get to wear something other than rags once dress rehearsals began. For now, they were still practicing in their street clothes. The act was a cunningly staged flashback scene. Mrs. Lovatt reveals to Sweeney Todd her version of what happened to Lucy after his arrest. The lights dim on them as Livy weaves the tale in her stunning soprano, and on the opposite end of the stage, Rebecca, Chad, and Scott act out her words, almo
st like a silent film. It was a challenging scene because she couldn’t depend on the voice that was her calling card. Instead, she had to rely purely on her facial expressions and body language to express her confusion, and later her terror, as Judge Turpin and Beadle lure the virtuous Lucy into a trap—a trap that would lead to the corruption of her innocence and eventually the loss of her sanity.
“After her dear husband was sent away,
poor Lucy wouldn’t come out to work or play.
The judge still longed to make her his own.
So Beadle lured her to the judge’s fine home.
The poor thing followed thinking help had come.
Really, the poor dear should have turned and run.
What the poor thing found was a horror indeed.
And no one would help the lost lady in need.”
Rebecca listened as Livy sang, trying to have her motions match the turmoil her character felt as she was brought deeper into the judge’s world, led by the greasy hand of Scott, who was more than convincing as the dastardly sidekick of the corrupt judge. The look on Scott’s face as she followed him into the swirl of dancers could only be described as evil. It made Rebecca feel nervous and insecure. Even as she pretended to sip champagne from an invisible glass that Scott handed to her, she felt her heart start to hammer.