by Lissa Kasey
And Kelly was afraid to swim in the ocean for fear of never returning to humanity, but I had often wondered how much it limited him. “He has you to come back to.”
“And if I’m not enough?”
“Fuck you, Browan. That boy adores you. He’s as moon-eyed over you as Seiran was over Gabe.” Was. Fuck. Were Seiran and Gabe over? And since they were metaphysically bound, how could that be possible.
Jamie bowed his head. “I don’t know what to do. I can’t leave unless I know Seiran is taken care of, and Kelly really wants to go. Needs to go, I think. Kelly thinks they need time apart. He believes Luca when he says something is wrong with Gabe, with most vampires. But what’s the solution to that? Kill them all like the government suggests? Even if we went to that extreme, killing Gabe might kill Seiran, which in turn would cause a catastrophic world event which could kill millions if not the entire planet.”
“Whoa, big guy. Hold up those black-eyed horses of doom for a minute. No one is suggesting we kill Gabe.”
“The government has. They’ve even contacted me to see if any of us are willing to do it in private. Only my warnings about what it might do to Seiran, and the rest of the world, has kept them at bay,” Jamie said.
“Well isn’t that just the good old American way? If it can’t control it, kill it? Fuckers.” I didn’t think Gabe was the root of the problem. He hadn’t been this bad when I’d gone to ground, though he had been floundering for a while. “Gabe needs to go to ground. Not in the permanent sort of way. More in a very necessary nap sort of way.”
“I’ve suggested it to him. He snaps at me.”
“Because his head is off.” I recalled my own being terrified of the very thing. “He’s not rational because he’s fighting to keep awake when he’s so far beyond exhausted, he’s barely on his feet.” Because that’s how I had felt. Now I felt tired, sure, but more like that normal, hey I had a long day tired, than the dragging agony of exhaustion with life.
“It’s not like we can just kidnap him and shove him into a plot of dirt.”
I wasn’t sure that was impossible. The earth had grabbed me, pulled me back like a living thing. Had that been Seiran’s influence? Somehow I didn’t think so. Perhaps that death magic I’d been suspecting was a whole other thing, rather than anything scientific, and had been the key. Could we get Gabe to the tomb and shove him in? That was a hard no. We’d have to trick him somehow, and Gabe always saw through that shit.
“Maybe we’re overthinking this. We just have to do something to make him want to go to ground,” I pointed out.
“Like what?”
“Everyone’s been telling me that before he met Seiran, Gabe was just looking for a way to die.”
“Okay?”
“So if we separate them, and give him an ultimatum, go to ground or you can’t have him back?”
Jamie thought about that for a minute. “But Seiran is Father Earth, which means he’d have to be on board.”
“Yeah, there would be no way to remove the witch without his consent, but that’s okay because he has other priorities right now.” I pointed toward my room where the twins slept.
“Fuck,” Jamie swore, like he rarely did.
The solution was simple enough, while being complicated at the same time. “We need to get Seiran out of this situation until we can fix Gabe. You and Kelly can go do your tropical honeymoon, and Seiran can catch a break.”
“Where will he be safe? He and the twins?”
“Again, Father Earth. You all worry like some old woman. He’ll be fine.”
“With a bunch of crazies always out to kill him or control him?” Jamie pointed out.
That was true, though I didn’t think any of them could really hurt him at this point. His kids on the other hand… “He owns a giant magic house in California.”
Jamie blinked at me as though the cogs were working in his head. “But who will help him with the babies?”
That was an easy enough solution too. “Tanaka.”
Jamie jolted back. “No. Fuck no! Do you know what she did to Seiran?”
“Sure. Mothers fail spectacularly all the time. She’s a tiger mom, which I guess you wouldn’t understand since it’s a cultural thing. I think she’s also learned a few things. She’s the one changing laws in the Dominion to make them more accessible for men. Sure, it’s probably because Seiran is her son, and she should have done something sooner. But she’s also sort of protected by the mob. You know, the mob of witches called the Dominion?” Tanaka had spent a lot of time visiting Seiran, bringing him gifts, both for him and the babies, and providing him with books on Dominion governance to help with his job. Was she fucked up? Sure, but weren’t we all. “It’s not like he’s a pushover anymore. He’s Father fucking Earth. You all treat him with kid gloves and I think sometimes he forgets that he could blow up this rock we are on without breaking a sweat.”
“What if she treats Mizuki like she treated Seiran?” Jamie said.
“He’d kill her. Hell, I would kill her.” I grinned at the muscle man who shouldn’t have been so afraid of a tiny Asian woman. “I’d enjoy that. I’m not a fan of bullies. I really love to teach them their place.”
Jamie deflated. “I’ll think about it. If I could go with them I’d feel better about it, but the house is nowhere near the coast and Kelly needs the water. Fuck,” he swore again.
I shrugged. “Anyway you have about half an hour before someone else has to be on baby duty. Seiran needs the rest.”
“I’ll stay until he’s up. I can sleep on the couch.”
“And what about Kelly?”
“He’s going to be up and off to school in another hour. We’ve been on opposite shifts for a couple of weeks. But his classes are almost done for the semester. He was going to take the summer off for the trip…”
“So you both need to get away and fuck like bunnies.”
“Sam…” Jamie warned.
“What? You’re cranky. Seiran’s cranky. Gabe is nuts. Kelly’s probably cranky. I’m the only one who isn’t.”
“This isn’t cranky?”
“Nope,” I said. “This is about as good as I get.” I glared at the clock. Gabe should be back by now. He was going to be cutting it very close to sunrise. I could feel the heat of it rising even though I was underground. “Gabe needs to stop drinking QuickLife. I dumped it all out. Don’t order him more.”
Jamie frowned, seeming to think about that for a few minutes. “Is it that simple?”
“No,” I said honestly.
“He’ll unravel even faster without blood. That will kill Seiran.”
“It’s already killing Seiran. He thinks his love broke Gabe.”
Jamie was silent for a long time. I checked on the twins and Seiran again. Everyone slept soundly. Good. I hoped they all caught up on rest a little. When I returned to the living room Jamie was on the computer.
“I blocked all the links for ordering QuickLife,” Jamie said. “I’ll call the store too, make sure they don’t send any over.”
It was a start. “There’s plenty of the real blood in the freezer.”
“Yeah, I’ve been ordering it, and keeping it stocked. Making sure it was ready for your return. I didn’t think Gabe was drinking any of it.”
He probably hadn’t been. “Any idea where he would have gone?”
Jamie shook his head. “No, but he’s out almost every night. Rarely works at the bar anymore. Mike’s been running it.”
Chaos. Of course, I’d wake up to fucking chaos. The sun did another insistent tug, almost six a.m. and I was going to bed. Fires could be put out later. “I’m headed to bed.” I handed him the baby monitor. “Seiran said something about going back to work today? I think that’s probably not a good idea.”
“Agreed,” Jamie said. He let out a long sigh. “I’ll call Tanaka.”
“Better you than me,” I told him and headed to the baby’s room and my bed. It smelled like Seiran. He’d obviously spent more than one
night in that bed trying to rest and keep an eye on his kids. I didn’t really mind. It reminded me that I was no longer in the grave, though I still had a million questions. Had I really turned into a bird? Should I tell anyone or was that just a bad idea? Not that it mattered much in that moment. The sun rose as I heard the door from the parking garage open, and Gabe’s footfalls enter the apartment. I closed my eyes hoping he would finally see the light and give us all a break.
My phone beeped, and I was suddenly annoyed that I’d forgotten to silence it. At least it hadn’t bothered the babies. I changed the setting and glanced at the text. It was actually a picture from Luca, in bed with Con, both looking warm and sleepy. It read:
You could be here.
Fuck.
Bastard. I texted back. Sun’s up.
But oddly, unlike before I’d gone to ground, while it tugged at me to sleep, it wasn’t a fierce smack down into unconsciousness. More of a “hey, you’re pretty sleepy.”
Apartment is sun-free. Blackout drapes everywhere, came the reply.
Which made sense since Seiran and Kelly both worked late hours sometimes, and Seiran was dating a vampire. I thought about it for a minute.
Jamie was here to watch after the twins and Seiran, and it wasn’t like Gabe was helping me with any vampire stuff. I looked over the picture again, the two of them wrapped up in the blankets, bodies close, sleepy eyes, and bed hair. Did I want to be part of that sandwich? Stupid question. Yes. Even if I was too tired to do more than the vaguest lift in attention.
I crawled out of bed, checked on the babies again, who slept soundly, and peeked out the doorway. Jamie was alone at the counter. He glanced up as if he could feel my eyes on him. He raised a brow in question.
“Is it okay if I go upstairs to Sei’s place?” Normally I wouldn’t ask permission, but I didn’t want to leave Sei or the twins alone with Gabe. “You’re staying right? To watch over everyone?”
“I’m staying,” Jamie agreed. “If you’re going upstairs, I’ll even be taking your bed for a bit. It’s more comfortable than the couch and then I don’t have to use the baby monitor which their powers keeps messing with.”
I swallowed a laugh. Of course they did. Normal babies, my ass. “That’s fine with me.” I found my slippers and put them on before carefully leaving the room, and tiptoeing around the apartment. I took two blood packs out of the freezer to bring upstairs. No reason to freak Con out by biting Luca when I woke up hungry. I glanced at Sei’s room. Would he be okay?
“He’s fine,” Jamie said.
That was wishful thinking. Seiran was not fine.
“He will be fine,” Jamie amended. “I’m working on a few things. I’ll catch you up later. Go get some sleep. If I had two attractive men waiting for me, I’d be moving my ass a lot faster.”
I gaped at him. How had he known?
“They haven’t been subtle, and I’m not blind,” Jamie said.
“Do you think it’s stupid? Am I making the wrong choice? My relationship history is for shit.”
He shrugged. “No one can really know until you try, right? Love is always a crapshoot. Either you win or you lose. But you never know until you play the game. I know they are both interested in you for you, not because you have some weird amplifying power. I’d say that’s a good start.”
“Even with all the vampire chaos going on?”
“Only time you have guaranteed is the present.”
Fuck. When did the muscleman get so damn smart? Dammit. “You’ve got Sei.”
He nodded. “I do.”
I shouldn’t have cared so much. Seiran had been my arch enemy for a while. Only that had been in my own head. He never felt that way about me. More annoyed that I bothered him. Now I guess I considered him a friend. Fuck but life, or unlife if that’s what I had, was complicated.
“Go,” Jamie insisted quietly. “They’re fine.”
I rubbed the bracelet Seiran gave me and tiptoed to the elevator. “The dinger on this thing is really loud,” I remarked when I pushed the button and the box appeared a few seconds later.
I sent Luca a text, Coming.
“Only to vampires,” Jamie said. “The tone is set for your hearing range. I don’t even notice it. I think Seiran hears it, but not the same way the rest of us do.”
Well fuck. Something else to make me weird. I stepped into the elevator, waved goodbye and hit the button to jump up a floor. Sei and Kelly’s apartment was on the inner courtyard just across the lobby. I hoped Seiran hadn’t change his wards too much because there was about fifteen feet of direct sunlight separating the elevator and their front door.
The last thing I wanted was to be stuck in the lobby outside the door feeling like my skin was on fire. How long would it take before my skin actually began to burn? I hadn’t braved being outside in the sunlight long enough to know.
Luca stood beside the elevator door when it opened. He had a blanket, which he wrapped around me and guided me into the apartment. As soon as the door closed we were encased in darkness and he took the blanket back. He turned the light on over the sink in the kitchen. I headed to the freezer to store the packets of blood.
“I can doctor that stuff up for you later, but it still won’t taste as good as me,” Luca said.
I was pretty sure that was true. “I don’t want to freak out Con.”
Luca nodded. Once I’d put the blood packs away he tugged me toward the bedroom. Technically it was Seiran’s room. There was nothing of him in it since he lived mostly downstairs. I think the only thing that really reflected him in the room was the last remaining bookshelf filled with a handful of romance novels. My vision adjusted to the darkness enough to see Con’s outline in the bed. He could have been sleeping, and I might have thought that’s what his stillness was, if it hadn’t been for his heartrate, which I knew was higher than his regular sleeping rate.
“You okay with this?” I asked Con, kicking off my slippers. “I can sleep on the couch.”
“Come to bed,” he said.
Luca climbed into the bed, setting himself in the middle. I was okay with that. If Con needed a buffer from remembering I was a vampire, that was fine. I couldn’t change what I was, and he’d had just as shitty of an experience with vampires as I had.
I made my way to Luca’s side of the bed and crawled in beside him. The queen-size bed should have been enough for all of us to have our spots, but Luca wrapped his arms around me and tugged me closer, throwing the blanket over us and snuggling until his face was buried in my neck. “Sleep,” he said.
I could hear Con’s breathing. He shifted around until he spooned Luca and could touch me. His breathing hitched a little, but he didn’t bolt. I closed my eyes, bowing to the sleepiness and the heat of the bed. Their problems weren’t mine, I reminded myself as I let sleep take me. I couldn’t save anyone and wasn’t obligated to. All I could be was me.
Chapter 15
I awoke in a sandwich of limbs. Luca mostly, though Con perched over us playing some sort of game on his phone. The sun was still up, which felt odd, like a tingling in my veins. A reminder perhaps. The one perk of being a vampire—or maybe it wasn’t a perk—was that I never woke up hard. My dick did a little tiny jolt of “hey, that’s nice” when I realized Luca’s hand rested on my hip right next to it, but that was all. I’d need blood before any games were had.
Had Luca gone to bed in just a pair of tiny undies or had he stripped down to them as I slept?
The fact that Con was still in bed, awake, but unfazed, gave me hope that maybe he wasn’t as terrified of me as a vampire as he let on. Did vampires die when they slept? Did I stop breathing? My heartbeat still? Did my flesh go cold? I felt warm. But that could have been Luca’s heat absorbing into me. Or the zinging warmth of the bracelet still wrapped around my wrist.
Luca smelled like a steak breakfast with a side of bacon and a huge glass of orange juice. Fuck. His neck was only inches away, pulsing with sweet life that my stomach decided it really w
anted with a loud grumble. Con froze and glanced our way. I jolted up out of the bed, unseating Luca, and rushed into the kitchen. The blood in the bag wouldn’t be nearly as satisfying, but I wasn’t going to send Con into fits today either.
Luca appeared a moment later, rubbing his eyes as he headed to the coffeepot, put in a pod and hit the button. He watched me empty a packet into a mug. I nuked the blood for almost a minute to take the chill off. Not much was going to help the flavor. It smelled like old blood I realized. I carefully lifted the warm mug out of the microwave, trying not to cringe at the smell.
Luca took a knife out of the cutting block and sliced his arm, drawing a thin line of blood. He squeezed the wound, letting the droplets pool for a few seconds. My mouth watered at the thought of licking that wound. Fuck, was I twisted or what? But he let the drops fall into my mug, squeezing a few more out before offering me his arm to lick the wound closed.
I ran my tongue along the length of it, wishing it were his cock and I was already full of blood for the day. I kept my eyes locked on his. He shivered.
“Fuck,” he grumbled. “Did you mean to send me that thought?” His wound closed, and I took a sip of the blood in the mug. Not terrible. It was like adding a bit of cream to coffee. An edge of bitterness, not enough to make it good, but just enough to make it palatable.
“What thought?” I asked, watching Luca rinse the knife then put it in the dishwasher. He picked up the mug of coffee and took a large gulp, black.
“Of you sucking my cock.”
I had thought it, but hadn’t realized I’d been sending it. Was that what Gabe had meant about giving someone we fed on pleasure? “Wasn’t intentional.”
“Not unwelcome,” Luca said. He sipped at his coffee for a few minutes longer, still rubbing his eyes like it was five in the morning instead of two in the afternoon. “You can suck my cock anytime.” He raised an arm and sniffed. “But I need a shower. Sleep stink isn’t attractive on anyone but a vampire. You guys don’t sweat like the rest of us plebes do.”