He’d told her how much he wanted to kiss her –and that in itself had been enough to make him question everything he and Alyssa had ever had; but when he had actually kissed her again, he hadn’t lied. He didn’t want this to be about the woman who’d left him..
If he was going to keep kissing Esme – keep touching, keep watching his child grow large in her belly – it couldn’t be about Alyssa.
Not anymore.
She’d been gone for almost two and a half months and he’d heard nothing from her. Perhaps it was time for him to truly consider that she might not be returning. The idea of a child being more important than her, it seemed, was too much.
It might be the biggest sign he’d seen, to date, indicating that perhaps he and the fiery Latina weren’t meant to be. Now, watching Esme, knowing that she was just the vessel within which his child grew – that she didn’t want children of her own – he could see her as more of a mother figure than the woman he loved.
It was a sobering thought, to say the least; but before Daniel could get too wrapped up in it, the doorbell rang. Esme’s head jerked up from where she was pouring batter into muffin pans even as he descended the stairs.
Doctor Amos Snell was on his doorstep. The man had been serving as the resident physician on the ranch almost since its incarnation. He was just about the same age as Daniel, and had experience working as both a private doctor in home and for residency in hospitals.
He was also one of Daniel’s closest friends and confidantes – the only man outside the clinic he would trust with the health of his developing child.
“Looking good, Dan.” The man’s warm green eyes met his as he took the man into a bear hug. Though it had been a while since they’d worked out together, the doctor still maintained a bulky physique similar to his own – though he was a tad shorter than the rancher’s statuesque height. “Looks like pregnancy suits you.”
“More than I might like to admit.” Daniel chuckled, heartened, as always, by the presence of his friend. “Sorry I haven’t been able to come to the office lately. Things have been a little hectic with the baby. Finishing off the breeding season and everything…”
“Yeah, I’m sure. But maybe now that you’re by yourself, you might be able to get a little R&R…” Amos trailed off at the sight of Esme stepping tentatively towards them. The young woman’s jeans and t-shirt were covered in a mixture of flour, sugar, and cinnamon, her hair in a haphazard, mussed knot atop her head. Even so, she was a vision that took him a moment to recover from. When he did, however, he found Amos gazing at him expectantly.
“Amos.” He cleared his throat, knowing that he’d have a great deal of explaining to do. “This is Esme. She’s my surrogate…the reason I called you in today, actually.”
“Nice to meet you.” Dusting off her floury hands on her jeans, Esme immediately stepped forward. When she did, her t-shirt pulled against her abdomen just enough for her small bump to show. Amos, thankfully, didn’t miss a beat, clasping her hand warmly in his. “Esme. So pleased to meet you. Dr. Amos Snell. I’m the ranch’s physician.”
Esme looked from one man to the other, her eyes wide. “It’s obvious you guys are eating the same beef. Are there any men here who aren’t giants? I’m glad I made so many extra muffins.”
“Muffins?”Daniel arched a brow in inquiry. He certainly wasn’t used to any woman on the ranch who was anything more than a pretty fixture. They looked good in jeans and boots and catered to Daniel’s physical needs, but, as he’d only recently discovered, other needs tended to be sorely neglected.
Not that he wouldn’t have liked Esme to tend to those as well. When he’d finished his phone call the previous night, she’d already tidied up the kitchen and gone to bed – something for which he couldn’t blame her. Cooking a five star meal had to take it out of a person. However, her absence had left him with a raging hard-on that had persisted until almost dawn - when he’d finally taken care of it.
“Blueberry and lemon poppy seed. They’ll be in the oven while you tend to the bean.”
“Bean?” Amos’ shaggy brows inched even higher. For Daniel, too, the term was completely new. He eyed Esme curiously.
“Bean?”
The young woman smiled, placing a hand over her stomach lightly. “It’s my nickname for the baby. Little bean. You did come to check him out, right?”
“Of course.” Amos chuckled as he moved into the house, carrying his bag with him. “Specifically for the Little Bean.” He shot Daniel an accusatory look as he followed Esme down the main hallway towards her room and the rancher groaned inwardly.
He was never going to hear the end of this.
The examination went off without a hitch. Daniel watched, awed, as Amos hooked up an ultrasound machine to give him his first views of his developing child. The image was blurry, and the child was only the tiniest shape at the corner of the screen, but all the same, it was enough to leave the immense man breathless in awe as he stared at the life he’d helped create.
This was what he had waited for – what he had longed for over the past decade.
What Alyssa hadn’t truly wanted to give him.
Amos informed them that it was too early to tell the sex of the child, but pointed out to Daniel its head and turned the volume up on the monitor so he could listen to its tiny, steady heartbeat.
His son or daughter in the making.
He took a moment to glance from the monitor down at Esme, wanting to thank her yet again for devoting her body to his child’s healthy development, only to pause with the words on the tip of his tongue.
The young woman’s almond eyes were locked on the ultrasound screen with rapt attention, her fingers curled into either side of her stomach with her lips slightly parted in intrigue. Of course, Daniel knew that Esme had been a product of surrogacy herself, but he wondered if she’d ever seen a developing child – let alone one within her own body. It had to be quite the experience – to say the least.
But that wasn’t it – not entirely.
There was a kind of longing in Esme’s eyes – a need for something more. And though Daniel knew that she had attested that she didn’t want her own children, he has to wonder if things might be different if she had the right man to support her – and the stability needed to care for a baby.
He could see her as a mother. A very good mother, in fact.
“It’s a boy.”
Her statement caught him off guard as she looked over to him, her expression sure. When he realized exactly what she’d said, Daniel’s heart leapt. It was ridiculous, he knew. How could she possibly know? There was no way medically- Amos had just told them so. “Don’t look at me like that. I know you think I’m silly, but I’m telling you, it’s a boy. I’ve got a gut feeling on this.” She looked from him to an amused Amos and back again. “And considering it’s my gut carrying the baby, there’s a pretty good chance I might be right, isn’t there?”
“Fifty fifty.” Amos assured her with a grin before withdrawing syringe filled with a murky looking liquid.
When Esme made a face, the man’s expression turned apologetic. “Sorry Esme, it’s for the baby more than for you. Hormone booster to encourage healthy growth.”
The young woman scowled, rolling up the sleeve of the shirt she wore as she stuck it out without complaint. “For the Bean, then.”
She seemed to be willing to do just about anything that was asked of her for the sake of the baby – even if it involved her own discomfort. Then again, for Daniel’s wish to procreate, she was endeavoring upon what many women considered to be, simultaneously, the greatest comfort and the most astounding miracle.
He watched with rapt attention as she took the injection with grace, and endured the rest of Amos’ poking and prodding without the slightest complaint. To his surprise, he found himself bristling slightly, when Amos endeavored upon the physical exam. This, of course, required him to, in essence, run his hands over various parts of Esme’s body as discreetly as he could; an
d when Amos reached between her legs, Daniel physically bit his tongue.
He was a doctor.
This was an examination; it didn’t matter if Amos was now privy to things Daniel himself had only dreamt of. The man meant no harm.
At least…Daniel hoped he didn’t.
If anything, he knew how easy it was to be bewitched by Esme’s unwitting charm.
***
Chapter Six: Pretend
Esme found her heart inexplicably light as she followed Daniel over the hill separating the main house from the stables. Dr. Snell had proclaimed the baby perfectly healthy and even though she was barely four months into her pregnancy, she found herself somewhat relieved.
Daniel was radiant.
Watching his face as the Doctor had shown them the child’s tiny head and limbs had been…utterly remarkable. The softness there – the selfless love for a child he’d never even met…she was convinced his sentiment had rubbed off on her. She’d found herself staring at the minute figure on the screen in wonder at what a human body could create.
Though she knew it was far too early, she’d felt the life inside her flutter, and considered, not for the first time, the gravity of her duty. She was carrying Daniel’s child. Even if it hadn’t been put there by conventional means, her belly would still swell and she would watch Daniel’s adoration for his son or daughter.
That, in and of itself, was enough to humble her – enough to make her feel a tad bit jealous of the baby in her womb. The little bean would have Daniel’s unconditional love – a father that wanted nothing more than to bestow his affection upon his prodigy and would never falter.
She herself had never sought such a thing from a man. She’d always relied on confidence in herself to get her through tough times – it was the one thing she could always depend on. Now, for the first time in her life, she had a glimpse of what a man’s devotion might look like.
She’d admit that she had never even considered that a man could have the things that Daniel had - could accomplish the things that he had – and remain un-jaded by the life that now surrounded him. It was literally breathtaking – the man could be well dressed and wear the same beat up boots every day. He seemed far more comfortable in his outdoor element than he might be during any huge merger – and she had, in fact, seen him at home far more than she’d seen him leave for work on any given day. It was obvious that he played a huge role in the running of the ranch, and that his animals were very important to him.
Which brought them back to her current task. Despite the fact that Apple throwing her had frightened her more, perhaps, than she might want to admit, Doctor Snell had informed her that it would only be safe for her to ride for the next two months or so – meaning that it was do or die.
She had to get back on the horse or lose her chance forever.
Which meant not only overcoming her nervousness, but also being alone with Daniel after fleeing his affections the night before. Esme just wasn’t quite sure what to do. Daniel had told her that he didn’t want anything between them to be about Alyssa, but he hadn’t told her for certain whether or not he was ready to let go of her completely.
And what about the baby?
Surely Alyssa would return to claim her son or daughter, and that, no doubt, would cause a scandal of epic proportions.
Almost protectively, the young woman covered her stomach with a palm, frowning. A newborn baby didn’t need that kind of drama in its life, and she could only hope both Daniel and Alyssa had considered that.
When her lesson started, her ruminations thankfully disappeared. Esme was far too concentrated on trying to stay on Apple, and worrying about any stray cats in the area, to lend any more serious thought to what might or might not be between her and Daniel. She had been doing fairly well before, and with Daniel’s patient instructions and a little bit of coaxing, she was soon sitting fairly confidently on Apple’s back once more.
She resisted the urge to cover her belly protectively every time her body jarred with the horse’s movements and, within an hour, she was grinning, her hair caught in the wind’s fingers as she circled the paddock again and again.
After a short while with the breeze in her face and exhilaration in her blood, Daniel maneuvered Apple to a halt. The man was absolutely breathtaking in a skin-tight t-shirt with weathered jeans, his Stetson casting a shadow over his swarthy features. Sweat beaded on his neck and brow in the heat of the day, and Esme tried to think of anything but licking him clean.
When he suggested that they go for a short ride beyond the boundaries of the fence – over the rolling hills of the immense property, Esme at first, protested. She’d only had two lessons. And she was pregnant! The last thing she needed was for Apple to have another panic attack when Daniel couldn’t get to her.
“I’ll be right beside you. We’ll go at a slow pace, and I’ll hold Apple’s reins the entire time.” His clear blue eyes were earnest as he gazed up at her. “I swear, I won’t let anything happen to you…or the Bean.”
At the use of her nickname, the young woman couldn’t help but smile, doing her best to bury her nervousness in anticipation. She’d finally get to see the full extent of the ranch – it’s amazing green sprawl as well as the hundreds, if not thousands of animals that roamed.
“Alright.”
Her acquiescence led to an afternoon of leisure, sun, and amazing beauty.
Though Esme was apprehensive for her first few minutes beyond the safety of the fence, she soon found herself to awed by the multitude of cattle roaming free over the property. They grazed where they would, gentle animals who were far from startled by their horses as they rode through.
True to his word, Daniel never let go of Apple’s reins, leading her in line with his larger stallion as she took in the brilliant scenery. The sun shone through the dappled leaves of oak trees they rode under – there were man-made lakes and even an orchard of apple trees ripe with heavy red fruit. Though Esme had never had the time she craved to appreciate South Dakota’s ample, gorgeous scenery, she had to say she might not be opposed to becoming the outdoorsy type. Perhaps if she spent more time outside during her pregnancy, that sentiment might rub off on the child within her.
He’d be an outdoorsman – just like his father.
The thought made Esme smile a moment before she remembered that Daniel’s child wasn’t supposed to be her concern. Really, she shouldn’t even be interacting with the man himself the way she was, but she’d be damned if she could help herself. Daniel Hartsford and his easy charm sucked her in.
“Here we are.”
She looked from where she’d been transfixed by the sight of a calf placidly drinking from a pond at his mother’s side just as Daniel dismounted his horse in a fluid movement. He really moved with an ungodly grace for a man his size. She could only hope that one day she looked that good getting down from a horse.
However, this go round, she didn’t have to worry about such things. Before she could utter a word of protest, Daniel strode over to her, his hands encircling her waist and lifted her easily to the ground. As her body slid against his, Esme inhaled sharply, biting her lip as her toes curled.
Christ, it seemed she wanted him more every day.
When his eyes met hers, she looked away, forcing herself from his arms to take a step towards a large willow tree, beneath which the shade was absolutely heavenly. Looking over the scenery around her, she sighed in content. Blue sky, the sun warming her skin, the sweet smell of clover and grass in the air. What more could she want?
“I’ve brought some wine for us.”
Her eyes bright, she immediately turned to see Daniel withdrawing a bottle of Malbec along with a few foil wrapped packages from a bag attached to his horse’s saddle. Though she’d seen him toting the leather tote when he’d left the house, she’d thought nothing of it. But now, breakfast seemed as if it had happened ages ago. “I know you can’t have much, but there’s enough cheese and crackers to compensate.” He gestured to h
er with a smile that stole her breath. “Hungry?”
God bless the man.
Within minutes, they were settled on a dusty saddle blanket, lounging beneath the willow as they sipped at wine and nibbled at heavenly Camembert and cheddar. As she ate, Esme could only stare at Daniel, trying vainly to figure out exactly what she had gotten herself into.
“You really like this.”
Arching a dark brow, Daniel gazed down at her. “Why wouldn’t I?”
“I dunno.” The young woman devoured a cracker smeared with Camembert. “You have a gazillion dollars. You could eat at five star restaurants for every meal if you wanted. You could sit in a board room and order people around from up high. You could go anywhere you wanted in the world.”
Daniel’s lips curved in amusement at her statement before he swallowed a piece of cheddar. “I prefer the simpler things in life.” He gazed up at the clear sky and the green leaves that provided the shade above their heads. “Money is all well and good. It’s there when I need it. But money also changes people. Them and everyone around them.” Sighing, the blue-eyed man glanced over at Esme. “I’m not very good at pretending, Esme. I don’t like all the pomp and circumstance. I’d rather be here…on my ranch. With my baby.” He gazed fondly at her stomach, making her blush slightly for a moment.
“Well, forgive me for getting in the way. “ Her fingers curled over the slight swell of her abdomen. “Still got about twenty weeks before you meet face to face.”
“Oh, you’re hardly in the way.” Daniel’s low drawl sent tingles over the surface of her skin. “I would actually say the scenery is improved with you in it.”
Esme felt the warmth from her face creeping downwards towards her bosom. She’d never been very well endowed, but her hormones were doing things to her body that she’d hardly ever imagined. Her breasts had already swelled from a B to a C cup and she’d be willing to bet money that she wasn’t the only one who’d noticed.
The Cowboy's Baby: A BWWM Billionaire Cowboy Pregnancy Romance Page 8