And perhaps that was for the best.
Women had obviously led Daniel to believe that they weren’t something he needed in the upbringing of his child – and Esme didn’t want to pretend that she was any different. She was flaky. She liked her independence – wouldn’t forfeit her goals for anyone.
Not even a man who stole her breath and the child that swelled inside her with each passing day.
When she took her bath that night, Esme drew her fingertips over the crest of her belly, drawing errant lines of moisture as she closed her eyes. The following week, she would be starting work at Pierre’s. She should be thrilled. Literally leaping around the manor in excitement. Instead, she found herself oddly subdued.
She wrapped herself in one of the silky robes she’d acquired from the day’s shopping trip before venturing downstairs to the empty living room. It was past midnight, and she knew Daniel must be in bed. She’d been avoiding him the entire evening because she didn’t know how to face him. Esme was a woman who usually kept her emotions well in check. It was the only way she’d known she’d be able to be a surrogate in the first place.
But the handsome mogul had taken everything she believed about herself and utterly shattered it. Now, she didn’t know where she stood – and the realization had her terribly off balance.
She lounged on the couch, flipping aimlessly through channels for a while until she switched the television off to sit in the dark in silence. Within her, Daniel’s son stirred and she swallowed thickly, running a hand through her still damp hair.
Christ, how had she gotten herself into this position?
“You can’t sleep either?”
She turned her head to see Daniel’s figure silhouetted in the moonlight streaming in from the back veranda. The man wore only a pair of low slung silk pajama pants, the muscles of his chest, abdomen and arms thrown into sharp relief by light and shadow. Esme turned away quickly, her throat dry with instant desire.
“Yeah…I’ve just…got a lot on my mind.”
“I can only imagine.” She heard his bare feet on the wooden floor as he crossed the room to stand behind her. When the man’s strong, sure hands fell on her shoulders, Esme leaned almost unconsciously into his touch. He began a slow, steady massage that sent ripples of bliss through her muscles as they eased despite themselves. Within moments, the young woman sagged back against the couch, her worries fading into a realm of utter relaxation.
A comfortable silence fell between them as Daniel eased the kinks from her upper body with masterful precision. In another life, Esme considered, the man would have made a hell of a masseuse. He could add it to his list of talents – right under cattle wrangling and being a complete and utter boss at life.
“Esme.” His low drawl thrummed through her, making the heat between her legs throb.
“Hm?” Jesus, the man was trying to be sweet and she was a complete and utter horndog.
“Will you come upstairs with me?”
Well, it appeared she wasn’t the only one with a one track mind. Turning to face the man as she rose onto her knees on the couch, Esme offered him her mouth. Daniel pressed hips lips to hers hungrily, tasting her with a fervor that had come to haunt her dreams. Easily, he slipped his arms beneath her, lifting her to carry bridal style toward the stairs.
His mouth never leaving hers, they ascended to the second floor, and by the time they reached the door to his room, Esme was consumed with her desire for him.
However, when she tore her mouth from his, she froze in his grip.
They weren’t in the doorway of the master suite, but rather standing in front of the closed door to the nursery. The one room in the house she had never explored. Before she could speak a single word, Daniel spoke. “I want you to see it, Esme. I know what you think…and I’m telling you that you’re wrong. You’re not intruding for caring about the baby you’re carrying. You’ll care for the baby more than any other woman in its life…so why shouldn’t you see?”
He shifted her in his arms and Esme’s heart began to pound. It wasn’t that she was scared that he’d think her intrusive so much as she feared becoming attached to the idea of something she could never have. That, in her mind, was the most horrible thing that could occur. She didn’t know if she could spend the rest of her life wondering what could have been.
“Daniel…I can’t go in there.”
“Why not?” She looked into his inquiring gaze, taking a calming breath. She had to make him understand.
“I’m not a part of that. I’m a vessel…a tool. What happens after me…that’s none of my business. Nor should it be.”
For a moment, Daniel said nothing. Then, without warning, he hefted her weight to one muscular arm before pushing the door to the nursery open.
The sight that met Esme’s eyes nearly stopped her heart.
It was utterly perfect.
The walls were an eggshell color, with accents of forest green, and along one wall was painted a mural of the moon and stars, gazing down on the room with affectionate aplomb. The furniture was done in light mahogany - from two gleaming rocking chairs to gorgeous bureau, changing table and crib. The room was veritable piled with stuffed animals, the closet brimming with clothes while a carrier hung from a series of intricately carved wall-hooks near the door.
It was, Esme realized, exactly the kind of nursery she might have wanted for her own children – had such a thing ever been in the cards for her. Even as she closed her eyes, the dark-haired woman couldn’t stop the images that flooded into her mind. Her, bent over the crib, humming softly to the baby as she lulled him to sleep. Or seated in the rocking chair, he pressed to her breast. Her chasing a golden-haired toddler around the perimeter of the room and breaking into helpless laughter when he hid behind a huge stuffed bear.
And all while Daniel watched protectively – his eyes full of protective love and affection. Esme felt her heart clench as a tear escaped from the corner of her eye. “It’s beautiful. Can we please go now?”
In direct opposition to her request, Daniel slipped into the nursery, nudging the door shut behind them. He carried her across the room to kneel on a soft, forest green throw before laying her gently on the floor before him. “Esme...” he murmured softly. “The baby’s birth doesn’t have to be the end of us. I know it’s…it’s not what you planned. But if you wanted to see him or her…if you wanted to stay-”
“Please, don’t, Daniel.” She didn’t know if she could take it. Not now, with her hormones raging, while she was so unsure. “You know that’s not how it works. We signed a contract. None of this was ever meant to go so far…we can’t. There’s just no way.”
“If you really believed that, then you wouldn’t run from me after we make love.” The man stretched out on the carpet next to her, his expression utterly serious as he placed a warm hand over the swell of her abdomen. “You would sleep peacefully in bed beside me, knowing you could just walk away when all of this is said and done.”
Esme’s heart skipped a beat as she looked away, swallowing thickly as she tried to get handle on her emotions. She uttered not a single word. What would she even say? Would she lie? Deny that he was right?
“But you can’t walk away, can you? No more than I can. You’ve shown me something, Esme. A bond between two people I wasn’t sure could even exist anymore. I can’t simply give that up.” He lifted his hand to cup her chin, drawing her face upwards until they were face to face. “So screw the goddamn contracts. After the baby is born, we’ll figure something out. And we’ll do it together.”
Esme couldn’t breathe. What he was offering her…what he was suggesting…it was something she had never even ventured to imagine. A possible future with the man who had altered her horizons…and a chance to participate in the life of the child she’d come, inexplicably to long for.
She could still walk away. If she recalled who she had been before she’d met Daniel – before he’d walked into her life and changed absolutely everything, she could
go back. She could walk out, and the only thing between them would be the baby.
But that was the one thing she couldn’t do.
“Daniel…” The words escaped her in a breathless whisper. “I’m not his mother…”
“But you could be.” The man searched her eyes with his own, his gaze searing her to her very core. “You’re the only one I’d even begin to consider, Esme. You’ve done something to me. Hell if I know what it is…but hell if I want you to stop.” With that, he pressed his mouth to hers, the heat of his body making her arch from the carpet in want against him.
Esme was utterly lost.
This man wanted her in his life – in the baby’s life….it was the most humbling thing to ever occur in her entire life. Nothing could compare. Not her position at Pierre’s, her first successful recipe, or even the pride she’d felt at her first real sous chef position. This man…he was everything – where she hadn’t known a man could be before.
She kissed him back. Hungrily, she drank from him as if he were life itself. Daniel’s nimble fingers made quick work of her robe, spreading the silken material aside to reveal the swathe of bare skin beneath. For a moment, he just stared at her, his eyes wide as he took in her curves clad in only the briefest of lace panties and a push-up bra – another of her purchases from that afternoon. While Esme had felt somewhat silly donning the racy underwear, now, she regretted not a single thing.
“Christ, almighty, woman.” Daniel’s voice was hushed with awe. “You’re going to be the death of me.” In that moment, the young woman didn’t think she’d mind. She gasped as Daniel’s mouth roamed over the sensitive skin of her neck and shoulders before venturing lower, to the swell of her breasts. While normally, the man was rough enough – insistent enough – to drive her wild with anticipation, this time he was slow and sinuous. Esme didn’t know which was worse.
He eased the straps of her bra from her shoulders before sliding them down to expose the full rounds of her breasts. Pregnancy had seen them grow more than two cup sizes, and they ached the moment Daniel freed them. He, however, didn’t leave the heavy mounds bereft for long. When his mouth latched onto a tight nipple, a cry immediately escaped Esme as she clung to him, her body trembling.
Daniel groaned, the sound reverberating through the hot flesh in his mouth so Esme shuddered before he bit and licked at the small nub. He released it only when she was whimpering, her thighs slick with her own moisture.
The other breast got the same treatment and Esme’s fingers threaded through the man’s rampant blonde locks. The hot, wet suction of his mouth threatened to drive her out of her mind, and she trembled at the delectation that shot through her, never wanting it to end.
He continued lower, over her ribcage before pressing a brief kiss to the peak of her belly, and then he was peeling her damp panties down her thighs. The man’s mouth pressed hungrily against her hip, then each of her pelvic bones in turn before his kisses touched the slick folds of her femininity. A soft, shuddering moan escaped her as Daniel tenderly tasted her with soft flicks and strokes of his tongue. His mouth latched onto the tiny bud of her pleasure to suckle softly and her toes curled as her hips strained against his ministrations.
The man’s mouth could work wonders – she knew that – but now it was if he were purposefully trying to undo her, his lips, teeth and tongue working to push her towards the brink of an orgasm that threatened to rock the very foundations of her world. Strong fingers curled into her thighs, holding her in place as every lap of Daniel’s eager tongue drove her higher and higher – until she came apart on a hoarse cry, her entire body shuddering as completion wracked her form.
Slowly, she came back down as Daniel brushed his lips over her inner thighs, each of her rips, and finally cupped her jaw, drawing her mouth to his once more. She could taste herself on his lips and groaned softly in arousal at the rich, decadent flavor. Then, she was reaching desperately for the strings of his pajama pants, undoing them hurriedly to get at the prize beneath.
He was deliciously hard, jumping in her hand the moment she wrapped her fingers around his erect flesh. Esme stroked him from base to tip, relishing in soft, velvety skin stretched taut over pure steel. She guided him to her entrance, and when he slipped inside of her, she knew there could be no greater bliss.
Daniel was unerringly gentle, his strokes slow and sure – so deep that she cried his name at the peak of each and every motion, Her fingers curled into his shoulders even as her hips were pressed into the carpet, his pelvis undulating against hers until she didn’t know where he ended and she began.
Yet, she still wanted more – she needed more.
Esme’s hands lowered to curl into Daniel’s taut behind, pressing him more tightly against her. Above her, he gazed down at her with all the intensity of his arresting eyes, his stare never breaking hers as he thrust into her yielding body again and again. All at once, Esme’s mouth formed into an O of divine delectation as her orgasm tore through her, her eyes sliding closed as her head fell back against the carpet.
With an almost tortured sound, Daniel thrust a few more times among her clenching, spasming inner muscles before he, too, succumbed, filling her with the warmth of his seed.
They lay there for a moment, catching their breaths before the rancher slid from her to lift her exhausted form into his arms once more. Esme didn’t have the strength to protest as he carried her from the nursery and into the master suite.
The sheets she had once refused to sleep in now felt cool and inviting against her cheek, and, carefully, Daniel lowered her drowsy form to the bed, covering her with the blanket. When he slipped beneath the sheets behind her curling his body around hers as he held her to him, Esme hadn’t the slightest protest.
Even the baby within her was silent – content – and she’d never known things could be so right with the world.
***
Chapter Nine: Off into the Sunset
It was as if nothing could go wrong. For a week, Daniel was content in the knowledge that Esme would stay with him – that she had grown to love the unborn baby she was carrying enough to rival even his own affections, and that he wouldn’t have to fear losing her.
The first night they slept together was the best he’d ever experienced. That night and every night thereafter, she came to his bed without the slightest hesitation, and while the press of her curvaceous form against his was a reward in and of itself, for Daniel, the bigger reward was that she felt comfortable enough to sleep with him at all.
Esme had finally let down her guard and stopped being afraid of pressing imaginary boundaries. For him, it was if the sun had emerged from a cloud. She laughed more freely now – her smiles were warmer, and for the first time since she’d conceived, she was unafraid to talk about the baby.
She didn’t call it her own yet – he knew that would take time. But now, hesitantly, she expressed her vision for the child. He might learn snippets of his father’s business as well as the more physical side of things, to ensure he was well rounded. It might be a good idea for him to attend a public school, just to ensure that he wasn’t sequestered – that he thought with a level head and didn’t take advantage of his privilege.
For the first few days, she looked to him with each suggestion she made as if she were afraid he might bite her head off – shout at her, or turn her from the manor. But in truth, Daniel soaked up every word she said hungrily. He’d been contemplating raising the baby alone for far too long to scorn any advice she might give. He needed it – and to hear it from her lips brought him far more joy than trepidation.
After a few days, she grew less tentative, more outspoken. Of course, she still asked rather than demanded, and listened closely to everything he might say- that was Esme’s way- but as her trepidation began to fade away, Daniel started to see the three of them – himself, her, and the baby, as a family. The family he’d always wanted.
And then, reality hurtled into their lives with the force of a charging steer.
He was ready to inform the paparazzi to leave his premises before he sued the ever loving daylights out of them, but when he opened the door, a completely unexpected sight met his gaze.
It was Alyssa.
She was dressed in a black dress that was extremely inappropriate for daytime, but highlighted all her best features – the curves and valleys of her body – her inky dark hair spilling over her shoulders as she advanced toward him on stiletto heels.
“Daniel…you don’t know how happy I am to see you.” Her brown eyes glinted with an indiscernible emotion the moment before she threw her arms around him, catching him off guard. “You’re all I’ve been able to think of for the past few months. Literally, nothing else has crossed my mind.”
When she lifted her mouth to his, the taste was sour in his mouth, and he quickly pulled away, as if it burned. Alyssa, however, continued as if nothing were wrong. “Honey, I’m sorry I left. I was angry…but you have to understand, you gave me no choice. The baby…all these changes…I was overwhelmed.”
“And…now you’re not.” He eyed her with no little amount of skepticism, still in disbelief that she had just waltzed back into the manor after all this time.
“Well…I’ve gotten used to the idea of us having a baby together. Maybe you were right…maybe we do need to jump-start our little family.” Her smile was heart wrenchingly sincere – almost exactly as she had looked when they’d first gotten together – when she’d been carefree and genuine. “I came back because I wanted to apologize, Daniel. I blew up, and I left when you and the baby needed me most. Now, I want to make that right.”
The Cowboy's Baby: A BWWM Billionaire Cowboy Pregnancy Romance Page 12