by Zee Monodee
***
As soon as the broadcast ended, Logan allowed his body to relax. The news had gone without a hitch, thanks to the preparation the team had delved into and the almost instinctive knack he shared with Neha at improvising their way along. As if he could read her mind.
He huffed. Right. If he were so good at this, why hadn’t he seen that she would cut and run at the first opportunity the other night?
He travelled his gaze over her, lingering on the way she held her back straight in her chair. She appeared totally in control, but it was a façade. Her knuckles had paled, the pinched corners of her lips white.
This doesn’t suit you. Your mouth is made for kissing and smiling. In the shy way that completely undid him when she looked at him in the cocoon of intimacy.
Intimacy you fled from at the first occasion.
Anger smouldered inside him at the thought, and he bunched his hands into fists. She was worried, eh. Well, stew in your anxiety. Stew like I have been stewing with fear and concern for your safety until your daughter called.
The glare of the spotlights died on them, and she blinked to adjust to the semi-darkness, darting a peek to the left and to the right.
She’s looking for an escape.
Well, he wouldn’t make it easy for her. She’d made his life Hell after giving him a taste of Heaven. No way would he allow her to go back to her bubble-wrapped existence without a care or concern for him.
“Debriefing. My office,” he said.
“Logan, we have to talk—”
One glare silenced her. She bit her lip, and suddenly, he craved nothing more than to part her mouth open with his own and kiss the very life out of her. Bloody hell, he yearned to punish her for making him suffer so much, for treating him like some piece of rubbish she’d slummed with and now needed to discard.
Pushing his chair back with more force than necessary, he stalked back to his office at the other end of the building, not bothering to see if she was following or not.
Who did she think she was? The smallest courtesy after being with someone would be to acknowledge what had happened. He wasn’t some goddamned one-night stand!
Please be patient with her.
Suzanne’s words rang in his mind. His thoughts went back to another, yet-again incongruous conversation he’d had with Neha’s daughter, who strangely, happened to be his strongest ally and supporter.
At close to eight o’clock this morning, his phone had rung. He’d picked up as soon as he’d seen her name on the screen. “Shouldn’t you be in school?”
“We’re still allowed to talk on the bus, you know.”
He’d chuckled, imagining her rolling her eyes.
“I’ve worked her up good, and you should have no problem making her land in your lap later today,” she’d said.
“Suzanne, don’t talk of your mother like that.”
“Yeah, whatever. Just get her to see your side of the deal, okay?”
She had sounded so sure of herself, he’d totally felt the need to tease. “And how do you propose I do that?”
He’d heard a loud huff.
“How do I know? Seduce her. Show her your tattoo. She’s a goner for it.”
“Really?” He’d known this already, could imagine the almost reverent manner with which Neha had touched every curve and line of the inked design with the tip of her fingers the other night.
“Listen,” Suzanne had said. “Spending the night with you has got to be as reckless for her as ... Come to think of it, she’s never been reckless!” There’d been a pause. “Please be patient with her.”
The softened tone had clutched at his heart. Suzanne cared a lot for her mother and wished for only the best for her. Should he thank God she thought he fit amongst that category? “Honeybun, I cannot promise you much. She’s got to want to be with me.”
“She wants it. She just doesn’t want to acknowledge it.”
Snapping back to the present as he pulled the door of his office open, those last words echoed inside his consciousness.
If Neha desired him, she sure didn’t show it. Since the last moment he’d glimpsed her, when he’d closed his eyes and fallen asleep with her in his arms, he hadn’t seen nor heard from her. Over forty-eight hours, and she’d given no sign.
And he’d been so angry and resentful, he hadn’t dared pick up his phone to ring her. One, he’d have given her Hell for leaving, and two, he didn’t know what he’d do if she’d ignored his call.
So, he’d stewed, and when she’d turned up late today, his blood had started to boil up after the slow simmering of the past two days. Thank goodness there had been the news of the coup to deflect his focus.
Until he’d walked out in the corridor and seen her standing there. He’d yearned for nothing more than to go to her and pull her in his arms, kiss her, and then shake her so she’d tell him why she’d done what she had.
But he’d grounded himself. He also hadn’t missed the spark of panic in her eyes. She’d parted her lips, and a soft sigh had escaped her. He’d wanted to drink the air from her mouth, and crush her to him—
The door swooshed open behind him, and in a few steps, he reached his desk and settled in the big executive chair. The whiff of her sweet perfume touched his nostrils, and he inhaled, at the same time cursing Fate and Destiny and just about everything else because no one should have such power over him. Not when he hadn’t allowed them to.
She stopped near the desk. “Listen, about—”
“Sit down,” he said in a low growl without looking up. “I expect we’ll be getting news reports from wire services all night long regarding the coup d’état.”
He showed himself a right arsehole for prolonging her agony, but he couldn’t help it. Work also needed to be done. There was a time for everything.
With her usual, soft compliance, she went along with the debriefing session for the news. After finishing, he leaned back into his seat and placed his forearms on the armrests of his chair. His gaze on her, he caught the subtle way she wrung her hands in her lap.
“Can we talk now?” she asked.
He shrugged as she looked up at him.
Be patient with her.
Logan pursed his lips. He’d hear her out, all right. He needed to know what she had to say for herself.
“About the other night,” she said, and ran the tip of her tongue over her lips.
Bugger, he could imagine how that caress had felt on his body. He shook his head to clear the memory.
“I … don’t do this sort of thing, you know,” she said. “A one-night-stand is just not me ...”
So he’d been reduced to a one-night fuck. Bloody hell!
“It’s not what I meant. I mean, I don’t fall into a man’s bed like that. It’s not right. Not that what we did was wrong, but—”
She stopped talking, her eyelids pressed tightly shut.
Almost against himself, Logan found a smile hovering on his lips.
Seemed like Suzanne had been right. Neha was totally flustered and out of her comfort zone. But all this didn’t mean she regretted what had taken place between them. He’d never known her to babble like this, and a dose of lightness touched his heart when he saw her this way.
She threw her hands up as her eyes flew open. “Watch me dig my own grave now, won’t you?”
She sounded on the verge of tears, and she jumped to her feet. Once standing, it looked as if she didn’t know what to do, or even what she was doing there.
Maybe she thought he’d wanted a one-night affair. Here lay his cue to show her he craved more, much more from her.
She dashed towards the exit, and he shot out of his chair and caught up with her as she pushed the glass panel open.
He closed his hands on her shoulders, and she stilled, giving a sharp intake of breath.
Bending forward, his mouth close to her neck, he lifted one hand to reach for her hair and tuck it back behind her ear. With the delicate shell bared to his gaze, he kissed it,
softly, gently.
“What we did was right, and I’ll show you again.”
*
Neha’s heart almost stopped when his hands landed on her jacket. His breath whispered against her neck, the humid heat seeping across the silk scarf on her skin, and her lungs threatened to burst.
And then, as his light, fleeting kiss grazed her ear, she lost herself.
Who was she kidding? She wanted this, craved it. All the stupid babbling from a few moments ago? Simply words she’d tried to string together to give him the out he must surely desire.
But no, his desire burned for her. How could this be wrong, then?
She closed her eyes, afraid the moment would disappear into nothingness around her, afraid she’d peer into his irises and find fury and disdain burning inside those dark depths that had hypnotized her.
It seemed to her she heard the click of a latch falling into place. She couldn’t be sure. She focused on nothing else but his warm, solid body pressed against hers. He had closed his arms around her, to encompass her in his protective embrace.
“Neha.”
He whispered her name in her ear. She could cling to that sound all her life and find her direction simply by imagining the unique inflection he gave the four letters.
When he started to move back, she went along with him. They both stopped when her booted feet sank into the thickness of the shag-pile rug on the floor in front of the leather couch, in the far corner of the office.
Slowly, he released her and made her turn around.
“Look at me,” he asked in a coaxing tone.
Unable to resist the lure of his voice, she opened her eyes and glanced up at him.
“It’s a good thing you don’t do one-night stands, because I don’t, either.”
Her heart nearly beat out of her ribcage at his words. Did he mean ...
“Logan,” she said, but he shushed her with a finger against her lips.
“I’ll show you what it can and will be like between us.” He chuckled. “In case you forgot.”
A hot blush stole across her and burnt her face. She averted her gaze under the embarrassment.
With his thumb and index finger, he caught hold of her chin and made her turn his way. “Look at me.”
She couldn’t say the words held a command. Yet, compulsion thrummed in them, and after only a soft tug of resistance, she gave in to him.
He watched her with intensity, and she moaned when he brought his closed hand up, to allow his raspy knuckles to caress her cheek. He trailed those hands to her jacket, which he unbuttoned and pushed off her, his fingertips grazing her naked shoulders in the process. She shivered.
One by one, he removed every item of clothing she had on her. His touch came at her gentle, unhurried, languorous. He left the scarf for last, and as he gently unwound it from her neck, a smile graced his face when he uncovered the sight she had so striven to conceal.
His palms on her neck, he brushed his thumb along the still sensitive skin where he had branded her with his passion. The warm touch trailed up, until he cradled her face in his hands.
“You are mine,” he said softly.
Neha didn’t want to argue with him. A part of her knew she should be abhorred he considered her like a possession, but another, stronger and more wilful part, begged to belong to him.
No! She wanted to scream as a sudden burst of lucidity split through her pleasure-drugged stupor. He had no right to make her want this.
Who are you kidding? You want this man with a fervour that’s unholy and completely debilitating.
“Neha.”
“No.”
“Babe.”
Don’t call me that. Because then, I’ll be on the verge of giving in to you.
“Don’t ...” she mumbled to her own ears.
“Shh.” He touched his lips to hers to silence her.
Fire blazed to burning life inside her at the contact. The kiss deepened as he slanted his mouth on hers, teasing, coaxing, tempting, taking the very reason little by little out of her at every contact.
She remained there gasping for breath, for some semblance of sanity, for more from him than just the touch of his lips when he tore his mouth from hers and trailed kisses down the side of her neck. Shivers, like little electrifying currents, racked through her.
A plaintive moan tore through her when he placed his hands on her skin, his palms on her waist, fingers splayed upon her ribcage. With his thumbs, he started a maddening journey up until their calloused tips brushed the underside of her breasts, rubbed the skin again and again.
Neha no longer knew what would be her undoing—his touch there, or his hot mouth kissing its way down her throat and décolletage to the slope of her breasts?
And then, he touched her nipples with those thumbs at the same time he closed his mouth on one pointed peak. She gasped in delight, in agony, wanting more and at the same time knowing any more would surely send her spiralling down into a bottomless abyss.
Stop deluding yourself. You want to drop head first into the void. Because he’ll be leading you there.
“No.”
“Neha, what’s the matter?”
Concern rang heavy in his voice, undoing the last vestiges of doubt and stifling logic wanting to wrap their threadbare strings around her consciousness.
“Don’t stop,” she pleaded on a soft whisper.
“Never.”
She abandoned herself in his arms. With slow and gentle tugs, he pulled her down on the rug, and she sank along and let him lower her onto her back on the thick, soft pile. Seemingly from afar, she watched him remove his clothes, to join her, looking glorious in his nakedness. A sigh escaped her, a sigh stolen from her lips when he claimed her mouth with his and kissed her.
Time stopped when he explored her skin with his fingertips, then his mouth. When he reached the secret core of her, her body arched into his kiss, needing him to take everything she had to offer right there, right then.
A keen, low wail escaped her when he brought her to the edge of pleasure and sent her tumbling down the cliff. Neha bit her fist to stifle the sound. Never had she been so loud when she came, and this notion was the only hint of sanity she allowed to pierce through the fog of carnal satisfaction shrouding her mind and senses.
He lowered his body on hers, hips aligning, his weight resting mostly on his forearms flat on each side of her. The hairs on his chest brushed the sensitive tips of her breasts, and she revelled in the sensation so pleasurable, it almost hurt in its intensity.
Look at me.
The words flashed through her mind, and she gazed up into his eyes. Dark and fathomless depths, hardened by the edge of desire stretching over his taut features.
She brought a hand up and cradled his cheek against her palm. She could swear the eyes softened under her touch. But she had no more time to ponder upon this subtle change in intensity in his irises because he then slid into her.
Her body all but sang with joy at welcoming him back into its most treasured place. She parted her lips on a soft gasp.
He kissed her, very briefly, yet, the soft touch branded itself indelibly inside her heart and soul.
“This is what it can be like for us, Neha. This, and so much more.”
Please make sure this is true.
She’d been through so many rough patches in her life where she’d been deceived by her expectations. She didn’t want this, too, to be another let down.
“Trust me,” he said.
All she needed, and all she’d ever need, seemed held into those two words.
As her gaze anchored with his, Neha moved her hips so he’d reach even closer to her, even deeper in her. He took the prompt, as if he’d realized she wished to give him what he asked for and he had to do the taking; that her strength allowed her to only travel this much along the way.
He joined her at the halfway point. His body pressed more solidly against hers, and as she brought her legs up to wrap them around his hips, he plu
nged deeper and with more force inside her. She met his rhythm, and together, they soared.
She climaxed before him. He pulled her hand back when she tried to stifle her cries.
“I want to hear you.” Then as an afterthought, he added, “The walls are soundproof.”
No longer embarrassed or ashamed, knowing she had given herself up to the man who had joined his body with hers, Neha gave in. Tears sprang to her eyes under the force of her release.
He kissed the droplets as they drifted down her cheeks. Then, with a final surge, she felt his climax shatter through him, the spasms working their way from his thighs until all of him thrummed from the intensity of his orgasm.
Dropping his weight, he rolled to the side and took her along with him. Their bodies still joined, Neha found her head settling just right into the crook of his shoulder. The musky, totally manly scent of him drifted to her nose, and she took a deep inhale.
This cannot be wrong. Logan is totally right.
And he is totally right for me.
She didn’t fight the staggering realization as it crashed into her awareness. Why would she fight, when she’d found home here, in his arms?
Home. A big word, but not empty where he was concerned.
Right then, she knew, with a clear certainty making everything else scamper into darkened shadows, that she had found the anchor she had so longed to find throughout her life.
Everything she was today had fallen into place when she had met this man.
Her mouth lay right next to his neck, and she bridged the small gap to place a gentle kiss on the beating pulse at his throat. The rumble of his chuckle roared against her lips. Then, he bent his head and dropped a kiss on her hair.
There remained something she had to ask him, something she’d never thought she’d be able to do a few hours earlier. Yet, it felt like the most natural thing in the world.
“Are you free this Saturday, to spend the night with me?”
Chapter Twelve
On Saturday evening, Logan waited for Neha in the car park of the resort where the Isle Looks Contest would take place. He had wanted to pick her up at her place, but she had refused. She didn’t want them to be seen coming in together like this.