“A mirror?”
“Weird,” Claus adds.
I pull out the note and read.
‘Noelle,
From your response you think you aren’t something special. And I believe you are. You have beautiful red hair and sharp green eyes, a perfect Christmas present. I hope that you will be my Christmas present someday. You are beautiful and kind. You give that war veteran his coffee for free, you take blankets and food to the homeless. You are a sweet girl with a kind heart. You are beautiful inside and out. I know you’re thinking, a mirror? But I want you to look in it and see what I see. I see someone who loves with her whole being. I know you’ve been hurt, and I hope someday that you will forgive that person. Everyone deserves a second chance. Until tomorrow, fact for today, black hair.
Secret Santa’
This person thinks I’m beautiful? I haven’t been told that since Dasher.
“You’re blushing,” Claus snorts.
“Shut up.”
He holds his hands up in surrender and backs away.
I’m beautiful to someone and that makes my day all that much better.
Chapter Thirteen
Dasher
On the eighth day of Christmas
The mirror was a success. And now I’m watching her open up a train piece. Her eyes go wide, and I duck when she looks my way.
I also fixed her train set. Claus told me it was broke, and I know she cherishes it even if she won’t admit it out loud to anyone.
I love watching the smile on her face.
“How’s it going with her?” Briar sneaks in the back.
“Good, it’s only been eight days.”
“Are you going to Christmas Day or are you being traditional?”
“Traditional. Twelve days and then I will reveal secret Santa.”
“How do you think she will react?”
“She will be beyond furious, but I hope to make her see how we were together. We fit. And I need her. I have been away far too long.”
“What’s next on the Noelle agenda?”
“Oh, I’m putting in an ice cream bar today.”
“What does that have to do with anything?”
“A lot.”
She just rolls her eyes and waves as she walks back over to the gym.
“Delivery is here,” my sister says, and I grin.
I walk out to the front just in time to see Noelle’s jaw hit the floor.
She throws open her door and starts walking my way, so I meet her halfway.
“What is your deal, Dasher?”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“You do know. First internet, now adding treats. Are you trying to sabotage me? Oh wait, you are.”
“I’m not sabotaging you,” I whisper.
“What?”
I reach for her hand and pull her to me, “I’m not sabotaging you; I’m trying to get you to see your potential.”
She pulls away and wipes a tear.
“Noelle.”
“Don’t. Stay away from me. I’ll close shop if that’s what you want.”
“I don’t want that.”
“Sure seems like it.” She wipes another tear. Fuck, I’m an asshole.
“Noelle,” I start, and she just flips me off and walks back to her shop.
Well that backfired.
What do I do now?
“Time to throw in the towel,” Star says as I walk back into my shop.
“No, I just need to do something different, but with this, yeah, we’re closing up.”
I turn the closed sign around as she puts up an out of business sign.
“What about the other store?”
“It’s doing really well with Christmas and all, leave it open. It’s yours,” I tell her.
“Really?”
“Merry Christmas,” I hug her.
“She’s upset right now, has been ever since you left. Don’t you think it’s time you talked to her?”
“I want to, but after today I don’t think she will.”
“She might not directly to you, but she will secret Santa.”
She has a point.
“Thanks, sis.”
“Anytime, big brother.”
Four more days to make her fall in love with me.
I know that the twelve days of Christmas ends on Christmas, but I’m not one to follow the rules.
I do know that in four days her parents are throwing a pre-Christmas party and I plan on revealing a lot about myself and in the end, I hope I win her back.
Chapter Fourteen
Noelle
On the ninth day of Christmas
‘Noelle,
Four more days until I reveal myself. I was going to go all the way up until Christmas Day but I can’t wait that long. It’s been too long. Do you know why I love you? Yeah, I said love. I love you for the reasons I said when I gave you the mirror. I love you because you never back down. I love your sass and humor. I love the fact that we like the same movies. I always liked watching movies like Ferris Bueller and thought it was cute you could recite every line. You still watch Doctor Who. I hope your present today adds to your pile of cardigans you already have.
As for the smaller box. I’m hoping that when I reveal myself you will say yes. I think you know the question. You will have a short time to plan, though, we will be married on Christmas Day. Don’t worry your family already knows, even though they have been keeping things from you. I know that hurts but it’s because I asked them to.
I’ve been gone a long time and I don’t plan on leaving anytime soon, not without you. I’m probably the reason you hate the season anymore. I hope to revive that because it’s still mine. It was yours.
Fact about me: I was your first kiss.
Secret Santa’
My first kiss? No. He’s not. Dasher was. Wait. What?
I look across the street to see it’s dark, closed sign up. What is going on?
Why now? I mean if it is him, why now? Why bother with the shop across the street only to close it? Why anything?
I open the box and it’s a nerd paradise. The whole collection of Doctor Who Funko Pops, the cardigan that is based on the Thirteenth Doctor, the screwdrivers the doctors carry. Like I said nerd paradise.
And then there is a little box. I’m almost afraid to open it.
I know it’s a ring.
I don’t know if I want it to be real or not.
I don’t know if I want secret Santa to be real. I know he’s real. My head says hopefully it’s someone from my high school that I knew. My heart wants it to be Dasher.
Chapter Fifteen
Noelle
On the tenth day of Christmas
‘Noelle,
Did you open the box? If you did you would be storming the doors of all your loved ones demanding answers. I think why you didn’t is because you are at war with yourself. You want it to be one person but you hope it’s not. Go with your heart. It’s never steered you wrong.
Or others. You were always helping others in school, even if it meant putting aside your own dreams. You accomplished part of your dream of opening a coffee shop. Sorry for what happened across the street. That’s all done and over with.
I digress. You opened up a shop, but your rent is high. I know you’ve struggled making ends meet as well as rent. Inside you will find the last part of your dream.
This isn’t me buying your love. It’s to show you that even if I never acted like it, I always supported your dream.
To be honest, I lost my way for a while. It was why I was gone for so long. I can’t be there for you if I’m not there for me.
Only three other people know the reason I left. Don’t be mad at them when you find out who. They did it because they loved us both. I have so much to tell you and when you’re ready I hope that you will listen.
Have you figured it out yet?
Fact about me: I’m an avid reader. I also love the TV show Supernatural. What made it b
etter is when the jumpy parts happened you would squeeze my hand.
Secret Santa’
It has to be him. Would I be ready to listen? I mean my family has all said that I should hear his side, if or when, he came home. Can I take it?
My heart wants to think so even though it’s broken.
I should listen though, I owe it to both of us to do that.
“You okay?” Claus asks.
“Yeah, and if you knew, I’m not mad,” I tell him as I open the envelope that was left with the note.
“Holy shit,” Claus whistles.
“I own the building?” Not just mine, he bought the block and put it in my name.
“You are the owner; it says it right there. You can expand,” Claus hugs me.
“I can expand,” I mumble. I always wanted to. I wanted to take this and make it into a real café, with food and drinks.
“You should be happy,” he says as I turn around, wiping tears.
“You’re crying?”
“Happy tears and confused ones.”
“Maybe it’s time to talk,” he points out.
“Tell your scheming friend I’m ready, but it better be a hell of an excuse.”
“It is,” he now tells the truth.
Chapter Sixteen
Noelle
On the eleventh day of Christmas
“You going to the dinner tomorrow?” Claus asks as we go over ideas on how to expand.
“Mandatory,” I grumble.
“You don’t have to go,” he chuckles.
“I was told if I ’don’t, she would come embarrass me and make a big show that it would end up on social media or something. Not a chance I will take, even if Mom doesn’t even understand social media.”
“Fair enough,” he says as he points to some counters.
“How dressy?”
“She didn’t give specifics. Just said to dress up, no jeans.”
“I should wear jeans to piss her off,” I snort.
“I’d pay to see that,” he says as the bell chimes.
“Dean.”
“Noelle. Here you go,” he hands me a long box.
Like a dress box.
“Thanks,” I wave as he leaves.
“What did he send today?”
“I don’t know, genius, I haven’t opened it,” I laugh.
“Open it,” he urges.
“Alright,” and I was right there is a dress box in here.
But there are smaller ones as well.
I open the biggest box and it’s a beautiful dress. Silver glitter with a hint of green. Spaghetti straps, fitted, high slit. The other box is shoes to match and the last one is a green diamond necklace.
“Where did he get the money to pay for this?”
“You’d have to ask him.”
‘Noelle,
You probably know it’s me by now. And I didn’t lie. I still love you, always have. But I made a huge mistake. One that would have cost me you anyway.
I needed to get better. I know this doesn’t make sense to you.
I was taking drugs, lots of them. Weed mostly. Your sister, Angel, was supplying them to me.
We were fighting, I lost my job and found myself drowning my sorrows in a bar. I was so drunk that I thought she was you. I slept with her, thinking it was you. I didn’t realize my mistake until I sobered up. I felt like such a fuck up that I let you go. Your dad and mine set it up for me to get clean and sober. I was in rehab for a year. I stayed a little longer because I wanted to make sure I could be the man you needed. I stayed away from you even after I was out because I felt it wasn’t the right time.
But I can’t do it anymore. I can’t stay away from you. You are my love. We fit. I won’t be able to apologize enough. I know I fucked up. But I’m hoping you’ll let me make it up to you. I know being drunk and high isn’t an excuse. I’m begging you to give me a chance. Remember all the good times we had.
I promise you will be taken care of for the rest of your life. And I will be sure to tell you I love you and how beautiful you are to me every day.
I love you, Noelle. Ever since the first day we were put in the same play pen.
Love, Dasher’
Oh god.
“Did Angel set him up?”
“Yeah, she knew it would tear him up. He had been going down a dark path, we all saw it. You and him fought about it. He had been missing work and using. The day he slept with her; he had just lost his job. I know he regrets it. But he also really thought it was you.”
We don’t talk about our sister often. She’s used and stolen from all of us. Nearly lost our parents’ house because of her actions. Doesn’t surprise me that she would do this.
I can forgive him, but we still have much to talk about.
I won’t let him know he’s off the hook just yet. Sometimes you have to make him sweat.
“You’re going to forgive him, aren’t you?”
“I think so. But after we have a long talk about the last three years.”
“Are you mad at me?”
“No. I should be, but I know you were doing what you thought was best.”
“For your heart. I was pissed as hell at him for what happened. But when I sat down and he explained it, I knew he still loved you and that was why he walked away. We all thought it was best. When he was clean, he could come home and win your heart back. Dad gave him that blessing.”
“Thank you,” I tell him honestly.
“How are you feeling?”
“He broke my heart. But now that I know it was him with the gifts, each one makes sense now. Even after all these years he still knows me. It will take some time. But he’s always been the one for me.”
He hugs me and takes the box to put in the office as the bell chimes.
The little old man, the war vet.
“Black,” I smile at him.
“I think I want to try something new,” he says.
“Oh?”
“Mint chocolate latte,” he smiles at me.
“Are you sure?”
“Your website has reviews that rave about it,” he replies.
Website?
“And I’m paying. You’ve done enough for me,” he pulls out a hundred-dollar bill and gives it to me as I hand him the drink.
“Too much,” I tell him.
“You deserve it. Just keep being yourself, Noelle,” he waves as he leaves.
“Claus, did you know we have a website?”
“We have a website?”
Dasher.
“Apparently and the reviews for my lattes are five stars,” I show him my phone.
“Maybe he really does want you to succeed.”
Maybe he does.
Chapter Seventeen
Dasher
On the twelfth day of Christmas
Today is the big day. The big pre-party. The day I find out if she will take me back.
I know from Claus that she still hasn’t opened the box. If she had, she would have known the day I sent it who I was.
It’s a bigger version of the original one I gave her.
I want the world to know she’s taken. By me.
I’m getting her name tattooed on my finger after we say I do. And her name on my neck so people can see it all the time and know that she has my heart.
I know she saw me working out at King’s gym the other day, but she might have missed the tattoo.
I have her handprint over my heart. When we were children, we made pictures for our parents. Handprints. We were just having fun, we were children. Our parents made them into ornaments. I saved the pic and turned it into art.
My whole life has been her. And I will prove it to her every day for the rest of our lives.
“You good?” Claus asks.
“Yeah. Just nervous.”
“Don’t be,” he pats my back as he goes to my fridge.
“I’m going to start charging you,” I call out.
“No, you won’t,” he snorts and it’s
true, I won’t.
“Whatever,” I chuckle.
It’s good to be home.
Chapter Eighteen
Noelle
I don’t know what I’m doing. Am I coming or going?
I did as my mom asked and I showed up early. Helped with appetizers, baked cookies, laughed when I was supposed to. But I’m a ball of nerves.
Sure, I’ve seen Dasher since he’s been back. We’ve had words. But this is different.
There is a big question I have to answer and I’m not sure how I want to answer it.
“Noelle?”
“Sorry, what?”
“Can we sit for a minute?” Mom asks.
“Um yeah,” I follow her to the living room.
“I know what’s going to happen tonight and you have to know something. Not even Dasher knows.”
“What?”
“He didn’t sleep with Angel. She made him think that. So, there wasn’t any cheating. Just the illusion of it or whatever.”
“He didn’t sleep with her?”
“No. But he had been using. Just weed. We’ve talked to him since he’s been back and yes, we kept that from you, but it was for the best at the time. I didn’t know how to tell you, truthfully. I knew you were still broken up three years later and I didn’t want to cause any more damage. But believe me when I say that boy still loves you. He did this for you because he didn’t want to break your heart. I know that sounds stupid because he did, but he did it for the right reasons. Just know that he didn’t sleep with her.”
“How do you know this?”
“Because we finally got her into rehab and she’s doing the twelve-step program. She’s making reparations. She admitted this to us, but she will be apologizing to you both. She’s done a lot of damage to this family, but I will sleep better once she’s clean and holding down a job. Doesn’t mean she will be welcomed home with open arms just yet. She will have to earn that right.”
“I’m glad she’s in rehab.”
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