by Karen Baney
The figure started to come into focus. It was a man. Something was very familiar about the man. Where did he know him from? He had always known him—at least that is what Will thought. No. Not always. Since he was a young man.
Who was he? Who introduced him? Was this man his father? No. It was his father that had introduced him to this man. Who was he? The drumming in his head hurt so bad. Make it stop.
Hannah. Why couldn’t he talk to her? To tell her he loved her? Would she be able to hear him if he shouted? He opened his mouth desperate to tell her. No sound would come. He kept trying. Hannah. Hannah. Never will I leave you. I love you.
The figure moved forward into the room with startling swiftness. Who is he? He was certain he knew this man.
Yes, that’s who it was.
“Don’t take me with you,” Will pleaded. “I can’t go with you yet. Hannah needs me.”
The figure said nothing, but gently cupped his hand behind Will’s head. Instantly the drumming stopped, the figure departed, and he was left in pure darkness again.
He heard the woman again. Hannah. His Hannah. She was crying. She was holding his hand. Why was she crying? What was wrong? Hannah.
---
“Hannah,” Will spoke his voice barely audible but it cut through the silence.
She looked up from her weeping and stared into his eyes. The startled look on her face went to confusion, then to relief.
“I love you,” he said. Had she not heard him?
“My love, why are you crying?” he asked his voice hoarse.
“Will? Are you really alive? Are you really okay?”
What did she mean? He wondered. What happened?
He lifted his stiff and heavy arm, relieved that it finally obeyed his command. Cupping her face, he wiped away the tears from her cheek. His heart soared when she turned her lips, placing a kiss in the palm of his hand.
---
Hannah blinked, shocked at the sound of Will’s voice. Had she dreamt it? Did he just speak her name? Could she dare hope?
Looking up, she saw the most beautiful sight. Will’s golden brown eyes were open, staring back at her. Tears of joy streamed down her face. He was alive, awake! He moved his hand to cup her face and she turned placing a kiss in the palm of his hand. He came back to her! Praise God! Thank you, Father.
Overwhelmed with emotion, she tried to compose herself before speaking. “Will,” she whispered. “How are you feeling?”
“Stiff and sore. It hurts some when I breathe deep,” he said lightly touching his bruised ribs. “What happened?”
Hannah moved from kneeling next to his bed, to sitting on the edge. Wiping her tears with her handkerchief, she answered, “From what we were able to piece together, about ten days ago you were riding in the far east section. Your horse threw you. You hit your head pretty hard,” she choked on the words. Taking a deep breath, she continued, “It was hours later that Ben went looking for you because you didn’t show up for supper. They sent Covington out for the doctor but brought me when the doctor couldn’t be found.”
“Ten days? I don’t remember any of it.”
“You’ve been unconscious this whole time. What do you remember last?”
Will thought for several minutes. “I remember being angry about something. I snapped at Rosa in the morning over something stupid.” He paused, then whispered, “I was angry with you.”
“At me? Whatever for? The last time I saw you was the day we spent here with the picnic by the lake. When you came with the delivery for the boardinghouse, Betty said you left abruptly. I was crushed. I had been looking forward to seeing you.”
When she mentioned the boardinghouse, she saw a frown pass over his face. He looked like he was either angry still or trying to remember something. Maybe both.
“I saw you with Harrison. I saw you kiss him.”
That’s what this was all about. He had seen Harrison talking to her that day and must have seen when he tried to kiss her. “That’s impossible. I never kissed him. What you saw,” she said, her voice taking on a sharpness she hadn’t intended, “was Captain Harrison coming to tell me was leaving. When he tried to kiss me I backed away because I don’t love him. I love you.” No need to mention that Harrison asked to marry her, again.
Will looked down at his hands. Several emotions passed across his face. Anger, regret, pain. And then as if a light dawned, he looked up and asked, “You love me?”
“Yes, Will Colter. I love you! Why else would I sit by your side for ten days begging God to spare you?”
His laughter sounded so good, washing away any irritation Hannah had a moment ago.
“I love you, too, Hannah,” he said smiling.
Standing, she returned his smile. “There’s a whole ranch full of people that are going to want to know you are okay. Rest now. I will be back to check on you later.” She squeezed his hand, then left, closing the door behind her.
Walking outside, she headed toward the bunkhouse. Before she made it there, Ben rode up on horseback. He must have seen her out of the house and been worried.
“He’s awake,” Hannah said.
Ben let out a “whoop.” “When did he wake up?”
“Just a few minutes ago.”
“I’ll have Covington ride for the doctor, then I’ll be in shortly.”
Hannah nodded returning to house. Joy filled her soul. Thank you Lord for your mercy.
A few days passed and Will continued to heal from the injuries. Dr. Murphy checked on him several times and was scheduled to return this morning. Hannah fluffed another pillow, placing it behind Will as he leaned forward. Then she handed him a plate of bacon and eggs for breakfast. She sat in the chair next to his bed as he ate, studying him. Each day he grew stronger.
A light knock on the door alerted Hannah to the doctor’s arrival. “How is our patient doing?” Dr. Murphy asked looking at Hannah.
Before she answered, Will said, “I am just fine Doc. Ready to get back to work.”
Dr. Murphy laughed. “That’s what all men say. But, let’s not rush things. You’ve suffered a serious injury that will take more time to heal.”
Will scowled as he finished his breakfast.
“Let’s get you out to the table this morning,” Dr. Murphy said. “I would like to run through some tests to check your memory and cognitive abilities.”
Hannah stood. Taking Will’s plate she left the room.
A few minutes later, Dr. Murphy assisted Will to the kitchen table. The doctor asked for some paper and a pencil as he eased Will into the chair. Hannah retrieved the items and laid them on the table. Looking at Will, she saw the color drain from his face. He braced his palms against the table, straightening his arms. She witnessed his dizzy spells many times over the last few weeks, and each time she worried he might land on the floor. A few seconds passed before Will dropped his hands to his sides, the dizziness gone.
“First, let’s test your memory,” Dr. Murphy said. He had Will list off his family members names, and Hannah confirm the ones she knew. Then he had him recite Psalm 23, which Will recited to perfection. Dr. Murphy asked him the names of each of his men, each of the horses, all recounted accurately.
“Next, let’s try some math,” Dr. Murphy said as he jotted several problems onto a sheet of paper. “Can you cipher these?”
Will took the paper and stared at it for a moment. Taking the pencil in hand, he quickly jotted the correct answers to the various problems. When he pushed the paper back across the table to Dr. Murphy, he smiled.
“Very good,” Dr. Murphy said. “Next, let’s try some reading.” He wrote a few sentences on the reverse side of the paper then handed it to Will.
Will lifted the sheet of paper. Staring at it, his expression went from hopeful to confusion to disappointment. Hannah waited silently cheering him on.
Will cleared his throat, “Is it right side up?”
“Yes,” she whispered.
Will stared at the paper some more.
A few more minutes passed before he tossed the paper aside in frustration.
Dr. Murphy said, “Tell me what you just experienced, Will. Were you able to recognize the letters? The words?”
Will looked down, ashamed. “It’s like I know they are words. Even some letters look familiar…but it’s like the letters danced on the page. I don’t know.” He looked away, shoulders slumped.
“Let’s try this,” Dr. Murphy said, writing out the letters of the alphabet in order. “Can you tell me what each of these letters are?”
Again, Will stared at the page. Hannah watched, holding her breath. Perhaps something would be familiar.
Will shoved the paper away again, seemingly distraught. “Why can’t I read? Why can’t I make sense of the words and letters, but I can solve math problems as quickly as always.” He slammed his hand down on the table causing Hannah to jump. “It doesn’t make any sense!”
Hannah hurt for him. How awful it must be to have learned a skill, know that you once knew it, only to have it taken away.
Dr. Murphy placed his hand on Will’s forearm. “Will, the mind is a complex thing and we know very little of how it works. I’ve seen patients who were unconscious as long as you with far less cognitive ability than what you are displaying. The reading may come back in time, but you will have to work for it, practicing daily despite the frustration.”
Will refused to look up. “I am feeling tired and would like to rest now.”
Hannah’s heart ached for him as she watched the doctor help him back to his room.
When Dr. Murphy returned to the kitchen, he said, “This is a difficult thing to face. I wish I could tell him he will be able to read again, but I just don’t know. However, I think with time, if he starts again with the basics, it may come back.”
Hannah nodded.
“Has he been able to get around better?” Dr. Murphy asked.
“Yes. As you saw, he barely needs help getting from place to place—even then it is mostly if he has overexerted himself.”
“Well, tell Will I’ll come to check on him the day after tomorrow. Keep him off horses until then. I want to see for myself just how mobile he is before we let him try that.”
Hannah nodded and walked Dr. Murphy to the door.
As Hannah sat next to Will, working on writing the alphabet, a knock sounded at the door. Will dropped the pencil, a bit too eagerly, and rose to answer the door.
“Dr. Murphy,” Will greeted.
“Will, Mrs. Anderson,” Dr. Murphy said, entering the room. Setting his bag on the corner of the rough wooden table, he glanced over at the papers on the table. “Ready to get started?”
Dr. Murphy pulled a chair away from the table and motioned for Will to sit. He instructed Will on raising his legs one at a time, then together.
As they worked on several agility tests, reality set in. Hannah did not need to hear Dr. Murphy’s diagnosis to know that Will no longer needed her help. He recovered enough to take care of his basic needs. This past wonderful week was coming to a close, signaling Hannah’s departure. She needed to return to the boardinghouse and her job. But, every intricate part of her soul longed to stay here with Will. She never wanted to leave his side again. She wanted to be his wife—though he had yet to ask.
Truthfully, she knew for days the time had come for her to return to her life. She put off the decision for the better part of the week until Ben—not Will—asked her this morning when she would be leaving. Will was there, overhearing the conversation, yet remained silent. When she glanced over at him, he looked away. What did that mean? Did he want her to stay as much as she wanted to stay?
While Will continued the exercises, Hannah stood and walked in to the room that had been her home for the last several weeks. She pulled her carpet bag from under the bed, tossing it on top of the bed with a frustrated sigh. She was an unmarried woman in an unmarried man’s house—a man now well enough to care for himself. No matter her desires, she must leave.
Folding her other dress neatly, she laid it in the carpet bag. Retrieving her Bible from the night stand, she laid it on top of the dress then clasped the bag shut. She tried not to give in to the loneliness that she knew was coming.
After she and Will declared their love for each other, Hannah thought with much confidence that he would ask her to be his wife. But he hadn’t. Hadn’t hinted at it. Hadn’t mentioned it. Had he even thought of it? Maybe it was too soon. Maybe he need more time. Maybe he thought she needed more time. Sighing, she commanded her thoughts to stop. There was no point in trying to guess his motives. If he wanted to marry her, he would ask in his time. And if not... Hannah did not want to think on that.
Taking one last glance around the bedroom, Hannah picked up her bag and shut the door on her way out. Dr. Murphy just finished with Will when both turned to look at her.
“Hannah,” Will started.
“Dr. Murphy,” she said, cutting him off. “I saw you brought your buggy. Perhaps I could trouble you for a ride back into town.”
“Certainly,” Dr. Murphy agreed.
Will turned to the doctor and said, “Can you give us a minute?” The pained look on his face stabbed at Hannah’s heart. Perhaps she should have given him more warning.
Dr. Murphy nodded, pulling the door closed behind him as he exited the ranch house.
Will reached out his hand and took the carpet bag from Hannah. Once he set it on the table, he took her hands in his. Looking down into her eyes for several silent seconds, he seemed torn.
“Thank you, Hannah, for everything,” he said softly.
Hannah willed the tears not to pool in her eyes but they didn’t listen. When she looked away, Will lifted her chin so she would look at him.
“I love you, Hannah,” he said before placing a soft kiss on her lips. Pulling her into an embrace, he rested his chin on the top of her head. She wrapped her arms around his waist holding tightly, desperate to take a sweet memory with her.
His voice was husky, when he said, “I’m going to miss you.”
She stepped back wordlessly wiping her eyes with her handkerchief. She started to reach for her bag, but he lifted it from the table then motioned her towards the door. She walked through into the bright sunlight. After helping her into the buggy, he handed her the bag.
“I’ll come see you soon, I promise,” he said, lifting her hand to his lips. When he stepped back from the buggy, Dr. Murphy hupped his horse into motion, leaving a part of Hannah’s heart behind. As the wagon climbed to the top of the hill, Hannah turned and waved as the tears rolled down her face. Will waved in return. Please come soon. Her heart called out.
Chapter 34
Colter Ranch
August 26, 1864
Will climbed into the saddle firmly strapped to Jackson’s back. The stallion snorted, then eagerly moved forward at Will’s command. Will breathed deeply of the muggy air. The huge white clouds littering the sky reflected the sun’s bright rays, making him squint. Pulling his hat low over his eyes, he savored the feel of riding in the open country again. While he rode for a few hours each day in the week since Hannah returned to town, today marked his longest ride yet.
Hannah. The woman consumed his thoughts and his prayers. Every morning and every evening for the past week, he prayed, seeking God’s guidance on how to proceed with Hannah. As his memory returned in the days following his awakening—as he called it—Will remembered the scene he witnessed between Hannah and Harrison. Her explanation made sense and he believed her. Yet, for days he held on to the hurt and anger, not caring that he misunderstood. This morning, he finally let it all go. And, with letting go, came a love so deep for Hannah that compelled him to make her his wife.
But, before he could ask her to live life by his side, he needed to ask her forgiveness. He knew he hurt her immeasurably by his silence the day he wrongly assumed she loved Harrison.
As Jackson climbed the hill toward town, Will grew nervous about seeing Hannah. This morning, he took extra ca
re getting ready. He shaved the stubble from his face. He wore his best shirt. He even brushed the dust from his trusty hat and shined his boots. He wanted to look his best for his future wife.
Wife. He grinned at the thought. Who would believe this thirty year old rancher would have found his wife in the middle of the Arizona Territory? He hardly believed it himself.
When he told Ben of his plans, Ben insisted he accompany Will to town, mumbling something about not missing Will’s proposal for anything.
As the pair rounded the last hill, they saw a group of roughly twenty wagons pulling into town. Will’s heart sank at the sight. Prescott was going to be crazy—it always was when a wagon train arrived. Already a line formed outside the boardinghouses, the restaurant, and the hotel. Apparently none of the new arrivals wanted to cook dinner, Will thought wryly.
Glancing over at Ben, he saw his questioning gaze. Sitting taller in his saddle, Will refused to be deterred from his mission today, although his patience may be challenged. With a slight motion of the reins, he urged Jackson forward down the hill into the fray. Stopping in front of Lancaster’s, he dismounted and tied his steed to the hitching post out front. Stepping to the back of the line, he waited his turn, despite his desire to run inside to sweep Hannah away.
The man in front of him turned. It was his friend Mr. Boggs. “Mr. Colter. What brings you to town today?”
Will said, “I’m here to visit someone.”
Mr. Boggs smiled knowingly before commenting on the growth of the town. “With the train that just got in, we’ll probably have to start building a school and church.”
“Are there enough children for a school?” Will asked.
“As of today, there are twenty or so school age children.”
Will raised his eyebrows, surprised so many children lived in the area. “How is life as a big elected official?” Will teased.
Mr. Boggs smiled, “Not sure quite yet. Legislature sessions don’t start for two weeks yet. We’ll probably be meeting in Don Manuel’s store, since he’s headed back to Santa Fe.”