Then he cast aside all decorum and restraint, and he rushed forward to embrace Bemossed, as he did with each of us in our turn. His old face warmed with the brightest of smiles.
Even the dour old Master Storr couldn't help smiling along with him, and he called out, 'Then they have brought us the greatest, gift in the world - and just in time for your birthday, Grandfather!'
All the rest of the Seven and the two hundred Brothers standing about in the snow let out a great cheer. Abrasax's attention finally turned from the miracle of Bemossed's existence to the sorry state of our clothing, mounts and our care-worn flesh. Then he commanded us to repair to the guest houses and recover from our great journey.
Chapter 43
The next few days were a time of rest and restoration. We took up residence in the two guest houses by the river, and we spent whole hours bathing our worn bodies in the great cedarwood tubs that the Brothers kept full of steaming hot water. We sat with the Brothers in the great hall to take our meals: simple, sustaining foods such as beef and barley soup, lamb stews, and hot bread drenched with sweet butter. We slept as much as we liked, in good beds, swaddled in crisp cotton sheets and thick quilts stuffed with goose down. At night, it grew bitterly cold in those high mountains, and it seemed impossible that we had ever suffered through the Red Desert's inexorable heat. As well, we had a hard time imagining that there were places and things in the world that were not bright and clean and good.
Abrasax's one hundred and forty-seventh birthday arrived on the third of Segadar, and the Brothers and my companions all gathered for a great feast to celebrate it. All that day Liljana had
labored in the kitchens baking chocolate and raspberry cakes, which were Abrasax's favorite. When it came time to eat them, he praised her artistry and declared that in all his long life, at this school and others, he had never tasted a confection so fine as the one Liljana baked for him. He commanded that the Brothers break out their reserve of rare teas to accompany the cakes; all present stirred into their cups an orange blossom honey from Galda that was rarer still. Its sweetness, Abrasax said, would always remind him of this evening with Iiljana and the rest of our company - and, of course, with Bemossed. We might have luxuriated thusly all winter, and fallen into indulgence or even sloth. But when Master Okuth deemed us sufficiently strong, Abrasax appointed each of us tasks: Master Juwain was to record a complete account of our journey, paying particular attention to what we had discovered in the Vild and in Senta's Singing Caves, Abrasax asked Liljana to begin imparting to the Brothers her great knowledge of herbs and poisons, as well as her many recipes for delicious foods that were unknown to them. He commanded that Daj and Estrella should receive instruction in ancient Ardik and other languages, as well as mathematics, music and the arts. When Daj complained that he would rather spend his time completing the Gest of Eleikar and Ayeshtan, Abrasax arranged with Master Nolashar for Daj to work this composition into his music lessons. Atara he set to caring tor the horses, sheep, cows and pigs that the Brothers kept in their stables. It was hard, often dirty work, unfit for a princess, much less a great warrior of the Manslayer Society, but Atara surprised us all by looking after these animals with a love that she often found difficult to tender to human beings. Strangely, Abrasax insisted that Kane and I should spend at least three hours each day practicing with swords. And stranger still, he asked Maram to sit at a desk composing a whole new set of verses for 'A Second Chakra Man'.
Bemossed did not escape the Grandmaster's demands. Indeed, he had the hardest work of all of us, for he had to face the most terrible of enemies in a relentless combat. Each morning just after dawn, Abrasax would go into the little stone conservatory to sit with Bemossed and Master Virang, who led Bemossed in endless hours of meditation. Their labor, as I understood it, was to clear each of Bemossed's chakras so that the deep light that lived within him might rise and blaze forth, unclouded by the dark moods and sense of doom that too often grieved him. And each afternoon, in the short sharp brightness of the winter days. Bemossed met with Master Storr to attune himself to the Cup of Ashurun. Whenever Bemossed dared to lay his hands upon it, this great work of silver gelstei glowed with a strong golden radiance and resonated with the Lightstone hundreds of miles away in Argattha. Master Storr soon determined that Bemossed could touch upon the True Gelstei from afar and reach with his luminous being deep into its heart. Someday, he might even master it this way, though Master Storr thought the danger to Bemossed would be very great.
Bemossed did not like to talk about this, nor would he say very much about his endless struggles with Morjin. One night, however, after a particularly brutal session of delving the Lightstone's mysteries, he took me aside and confided to me, 'Morjin will die before ever giving up the Cup of Heaven again. And he will slay. He hates ... so hatefully, Valashu. Far more than you do. And it is so foul - fouler than a corpse rotting slowly in a slaughterhouse for a thousand years. You think that you have known darkness in the Skadarak, but what lies within Morjin is blacker than any Black Jade.'
He told me then that he did not know how he could bear it.
But bear it he did, and more, he gained a great victory over Morjin. There came a day in Yaradar, just past the darkest time of the year, when we all felt our gelstei free of Morjin's taint, as of wounds drained of poison. Master Juwain ventured to use his varistei to germinate and grow some barbark seeds that he had brought out of Acadu, while Liljana pressed her blue figurine to her head and managed to speak mind to mind with one of her sisters in faroff Alonia, or so she said. Maram broke off his versifying to go out into the Valley of the Sun with his red crystal and unleash bolts of fiery lightning, just for the sheer joy of it. Then Kane took out his gelstei to demonstrate how the black jade had been designed to be used. It frustrated Maram for Kane to steal his fire, so to speak, but more than once, Kane kept Maram from killing himself in a great blast of rock and heat, or at least badly burning his hands. As for Atara, she did not regain her second sight. Even so, she spent what seemed entire days gazing eyeless into her clear scryer's sphere. As she told me, she did not look for things faraway in space or time, but rather concentrated all her will upon imagining them to be.
Master Storr finally deemed it safe to begin exploring the properties of Estrella's blue bowl, which Estrella gladly lent to him. He thanked her for bearing it all across Ea, and told all of us: 'You do have a talent for discovering gelstei. It is a pity, though, that you could not also bring me the lilastei that you say the Yaga used to turn men to stone.'
In early Triolet, with the snows falling heavy and deep, we broke our usual rhythms and routines to receive a rare winter visitor to the valley. A Brother Vipul, at great risk, had forced his way through the mountains on snow shoes to bring Abrasax important news. After Abrasax had allowed Master Juwain to use his green crystal to heal Vipul's frozen feet and had sat drinking hot cider with Vipul for most of an afternoon, Abrasax called the Brotherhood's masters into a conclave to speak with my friends and me.
We met in the conservatory that evening. Bemossed entered the room looking tired and troubled, and yet strangely happier than he had ever been. In truth, his whole being seemed to glow. We all took our places around the three low tea tables. One of the brothers came in to fill our cups with steaming tea and serve us hot lemon cakes. The many candles set ablaze in their stands cast their warm radiance on the twelve pillars holding up the domed roof. Snow plastered over the round windows to the north and west, but the southern windows let in the light of the stars.
After asking each of us to tell of the progress in the tasks appointed to us, Abrasax moved on to his purpose in calling us together. He sat straight and stern on his colorful cushion, his curly hair and beard framing his striking face in a wreath of white. Then he said to us, 'Brother Vipul has been ordered to bed, and so we will discuss his tidings in his absence. It is time, in any case, that we discussed certain things.'
With what seemed infinite patience, he bit off a piece of his cak
e and chewed it thoroughly before taking a long sip of tea. He looked from Estrella to Bemossed. Then he looked at the table in front of me, where I had laid the diamond that Ramadar had given me by the pool on Givene: the great gem that had once been set into my ancestor, Adar's, crown. Abrasax had asked me to show it to the Brotherhood's masters as a proof of miracles.
'I have said many times,' he told me, and the rest of my friends, 'that each of our acts, as with a stone dropped into a pool, ripples outward forever. Together on this last quest of yours, you have cast entire mountains into the waters of this world. We all worried that the risk would be too great and the goal almost impossible to achieve. And yet you forced Morjin to take great risks of his own. He spent much time and will working his three droghuls from afar. And to what end? The tribes of the Red Desert now ally themselves against him. In Hesperu, brave spirits have made rebellion again. It is said that King Arsu has recalled part of his army from Surrapam to smash it, and so we do not need to fear the conquest of Eanna and the northwest, at least not yet. Something else is said, not just in Hesperu, but in Sunguru, Uskudar and all lands: that Morjin is dead. The rumor has spread like a wildfire. The Red Dragon will now have to spend even more will to quell it. Perhaps he will even be forced out of Argattha to show himself, in Sunguru, I think, and in Karabuk. Already, in Galda, it is too late.'
He ate another bit of cake and drank some more tea. I sensed that like a minstrel working up to the end of a great epic, he revelled in making us wait for his good news.
'In Galda,' he finally told us, 'there has been another revolt, greater than the last. The Red Priests and anyone connected to the Kallimun have been killed or driven out. A common knight named Gallagerry has claimed lordship of the land.'
He looked at me and added, 'I am told that the revolt was led by common captains of the army that you and yours so terribly defeated at the Culhadosh Commons. You count that battle as the worst moment of your life, and rightly so, but what you did there, Valashu, now engulfs the world with the force of a tidal wave, does it not?'
I noticed Bemossed smiling at me, and I remembered that false humility would not serve me. But neither would pride. 'On the day you speak of,' I reminded Abrasax, 'what I did caused the Lightstone to be lost.'
'Lost, yes, but not forsaken.' Abrasax looked across the table at Bemossed, and bowed his head to him, as did Master Storr, Master Matai and the other masters of the Brotherhood. 'Bemossed now keeps Morjin from wielding it.'
'But Bemossed cannot wield it himself.'
'No, he cannot, and that bright eventuality must likely await the day when he sets his hands upon it.'
Across the room, the Cup of Ashurun gleamed upon its stand. I found myself wishing that this work of silver gelstei was the real Lightstone. I found myself wanting to promise Bemossed that the day would surely come when he would lay his hands upon the true Cup of Heaven.
'We have had reports out of Argattha,' Abrasax told me. 'Morjin has broken off the excavations there. He cannot, we believe, free the Dark One without full command of the Lightstone. And so, as of this day, he turns his attention to more pressing matters.'
'I have had reports of that,' Liljana announced. 'I am told that Morjin has prepared the Kallimun to make ready assassinations all across Alonia. My sisters believe that Morjin has gained a hold over Baron Maruth of the Aquantir. They fear that he will ally himself with the Marituk tribe and let the Sarni cross the Long Wall. Such a force could conquer Iviunn and Tarlan, and then all of Alonia could be lost.'
'So it could,' Kane added. 'As for Galda, do you think that Morjin will let the revolt prevail? Ha! - he will surely send an army from Karabuk to destroy this Gallagerry and restore the Kallimun.'
'And let us not forget that the Dragon has a new weapon,' Master Juwain said. 'If he himself, as his droghuls did, commands a voice of death, then woe to anyone who tries to stand before him.'
'Not anyone,' Master Okuth said. His gray hair gleamed on his round, heavy head likellron. 'All of you did stand before him. I should think that this death voice has something to do with Morjin's fifth chakra - and your ability, all of you, to withstand it must come from the soundness of each of your chakras. As Grandfather has said, your auras have been strengthened, like an armor woven of light. We should not be surprised at this: each of you, except Bemossed, once held the Lightstone. And Bemossed is Bemossed.'
'What you say might be true,' Master Juwain told him. 'But I still would not want to face the real Red Dragon, in the flesh.'
Abrasax allowed us, as well as Master Yasul and Master Matai, to speak on in a like way for some time. Then he finally held up his hand and told us: 'We cannot delude ourselves that Morjin has been defeated, or that what you did along the way to Hesperu will bring his certain defeat. But neither should we deny that we have gained a great victory.'
Now he looked at us across the table, and bowed his head.
'You, all of you,' he said, 'have done this great thing. And the marvel of it is that you did it without paying back evil for evil.'
I felt a burning inside my chest, and I said, 'Almost, we did such terrible things. Too many times, it was so close.'
'And in that,' Abrasax said, 'you gained the greatest victory of all.'
'Perhaps,' I told him.
'You vanquished your murderous hate of Morjin. And more, transmuted it, like an alchemist, into a thing of the truest gold. I know of no greater feat.'
I felt my mouth pulling into a grim smile. I looked at Bemossed; Estrella sat next to him, and she seemed like a great, shining mirror perfectly reflecting the brightness of his being. This last journey, I thought, had transformed all of us.
Then I said to Abrasax, 'With the help of my friends, I did - for a moment only. A man such as Morjin might be killed, once and forever, but not my hate for him. That is one battle that must be fought again and again.'
'And now you will fight it successfully,' Abrasax told me. 'You will use your gift to bring a great light into the world. Just as, in the end, I believe that the good will triumph over all that is dark and wrong.'
I found myself tracing my finger over the diamonds set into the black jade of the hilt of my sword, which I had laid at my side by the table. And I said, 'What you call the good must triumph. But it is no simple matter. The valarda, I know, must never be used to slay. It is a beautiful thing, like life itself. It connects heart to living heart, as light passes from star to star. It is pure light, in a way, and so love, for it brings into creation all that is bright and good. And yet, and yet. . .'
I paused to take a sip of tea, and I looked at Abrasax. Then I said, 'Morjin crucified my mother and grandmother, and that was the most evil thing that I have ever suffered. And yet it led to the beginning of my understanding of him, which is a good thing, yes? This burning sense of the soul that sometimes I love, and sometimes I hate above all else. With it, I saw how I might strike a kind of light into Morjin. He could not bear it, for he sees in the compassionate and the beautiful all that is weak. And so it drove him to make a mortal error. I did. You could say that I used a good thing to kill the droghul, which is an evil act in itself. And yet only through this evil and the slaughter of many men were we able to make our escape from Hesperu and bring Bemossed here - which you count as the greatest of good.'
Abrasax considered this as he ran his finger around the rim of his tea cup. Then he stood, and walked over to the conservatory's western wall. Into its smooth stone had been carved a yanyin: a simple circle, bisected by a sigmoid line, like the curve of a snake. Its right side was set with quartz, as white as snow. A piece of black obsidians made up the other half. I couldn't help noticing how the black part of this ancient symbol swelled like a wave into the white as if to push against it, as the white did into the black.
Abrasax touched his hand to it, and said, 'This reminds us that light and dark are inextricably interwoven in the creation of the world. So it is with good and evil.'
'Yet you speak of good's inevitable tr
iumph,' I told him. 'As do I.'
'As you say, it is no simple matter. I believe that life will always entail suffering, even after this age is ended and the Age of Light begins. But the suffering that man makes out of pride, ignorance and hate, which we call evil, that must surely end.'
He looked across the room as if to ask Bemossed to help explicate the deepest mysteries of life. Bemossed could not help laughing at the Grandmaster's obvious expectation. After bowing his head to Master Virang and Master Matai, he looked at Abrasax and said, 'You are the scholars and philosophers, men of well-chosen and beautiful words. Who am I? A Hajarim whose only gift is to keep burning like a torch so that you don't forget to light a fire of your
own.'
He smiled at me, then shrugged his shoulders as to cast off a great weight pressing upon him. Then he said, 'All right, I will try.'
He took a sip of tea, and his eyes grew sad and bright.
'I learned in the desert that water is the source and substance of all life,' he told us. 'As the One is the source of all things. It flows through us and all around us, like a river leading down to the ocean. And that bright infinite sea is what we all long for most deeply, isn't it? We have only to plunge into the river and let it take us there. But what man or woman has the courage to do that? It seems simpler, in our thirst for water, to wade out and try to empty the river bucket by bucket. But our thirst is infinite, is it not? Who has not known merchants who have amassed gold a thousand times in excess of their needs while their slaves starve to death, or kings who slaughter tens of thousands as they press on ever to conquer new lands? Or even once-great Elijin lords such as Morjin who seek unbounded power to fill the emptiness inside them? The ways of bringing hideous wrongs into this world are themselves nearly infinite. And so the ages go on, as the river goes on, and we continue to try to stand against it or to direct its currents for our own need. Why should we be surprised when it pulls us down into the mud and muck, and drowns us? Why can't we be content to discover how the river will flow? If we could do that we wouldn't have to speak of good and evil.'
Black Jade Page 85