“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to let it get that out of control.”
Kendall half wished he had meant for it to get that out of control. She wanted to feel him again, completely clear-headed this time.
Last time it had seemed like he’d given in just for her, but this time he seemed invested.
She shifted on the couch, trying to ease the pressure on her body. What the hell, man. She’d controlled every relationship she’d been in, for the most part. Why was her bossy security guard the one who finally made her want to give up all her normal constraints?
Grif pulled a notebook from the breast pocket of his jacket and flipped through a couple of pages. “I made some notes. To go over.”
Kendall’s pale brows disappeared into her hairline at the abrupt change of subject. She tipped her head to hide her face, but he was grasping at straws. With the need still heavy in her expression, it was all he could do to even stand without rushing to her and stripping her down like he wanted to. He had prayed that the first time had been a fluke and that the liquor had rid her of all of her inhibitions. But it wasn’t necessarily the liquor; it was passion. Kendall Herrington was a freaking firecracker.
Fuck, he could smell her need from across the room.
His dick screamed for release.
A shudder wracked his body and he knew there would be no way he could talk to her coherently until he did something to get rid of this agonizing pressure. He would not rush her, he vowed. She needed time to get used to the idea of being with him.
“Maybe we can, uh, do this another time. I need to take a breather.”
When he looked at her, her clear green gaze had focused below his waist, on his aching erection. He slammed his eyes shut and turned to brace himself against the mantle again. “Fuck, woman, I’m trying to not overwhelm you with everything, but if you keep looking at me like that I won’t be responsible for my actions.”
He heard a rustle at the couch then he felt her move behind him. A feather light touch landed on his shoulder, pressing him to turn.
She stood in front of him, eyes luminous from the light of the fire behind him. “You don’t have to be the only one. I think we’re both being responsible for our actions.”
Leaning forward, she pressed her delectable lips to his.
Grif groaned, unable to believe she would be willing to go in this direction. None of the details had been hammered out, but obviously her hunger was as sharp as his own. Maybe their mutual need and a shared child would be enough to build a marriage on.
Cupping her head in his good hand, he angled his mouth over hers, unable to get enough of her taste. She moaned into his mouth, pressing the length of her body against his. All coherent thought went out of his head as she angled her hips to align with his.
“Are you sure?” he asked, hating to give her the opening to shut him down.
She nodded. “I am.”
She grabbed his prosthetic hand and tugged him toward her bedroom.
Chapter 5
Kendall gulped at her daring, but it felt right. She’d found that her instincts served her well, in business and in life. They’d been dancing around each other for weeks, avoiding eye contact, physical touch. If she hadn’t realized she was pregnant, they’d still be treating each other as if they were enemies.
Scratch that. If he hadn’t noticed she was pregnant.
Warmth built in her chest at the thought that he would be willing to step up to the plate to give their child a stable life. No, not a declaration of love, but perhaps that would come later.
Right this minute, she knew no man had ever turned her on the same way Grafton Parks did. She planned to enjoy every second of their time together.
Snow fell softly outside her bedroom window, lit from below by a security light. The only illumination in the bedroom was from the bathroom, which cast a soft amber glow over everything. Kendall dropped his hand when she reached the side of the bed and paused. Grif didn’t give her a chance to be uncomfortable, because he stepped forward to wrap his arms around her shoulders. Automatically, Kendall tipped her mouth up to his, willing to be lost in him. His tongue glided against hers, sending heat straight to her lower body.
One of his broad hands crept beneath the hem of her sweater to cup her hip and warm fingers crept beneath the elastic waistband. His hand slid down, stretching the fabric, to cup her butt.
“I watch your ass all day long, and I can’t tell you enough how long I’ve been waiting to hold it, just like this.”
She shuddered at his heartfelt words. “And I can’t tell you how long I’ve been waiting for you to hold it.”
He pulled back enough to look into her eyes. “Really?”
She nodded. “Even before I got tipsy on the wine. You’re very physically appealing to me.”
He shook his head and his lips tipped into a frown. “You haven’t seen everything yet.”
Kendall heard the warning, but she didn’t know how to respond. The night they’d slept together, he’d left his shirt and arm on. The prosthetic itself hadn’t seemed to affect anything they did. She wished she had more experience with the disabled, or had asked her father more questions. Something to better prepare her.
“I don’t think one part will have much of an impact on the whole.”
His eyes narrowed as if to gauge the truth in her words. “Well, let’s leave show and tell for another time, okay?”
She nodded because she didn’t want any interruptions either. Deep inside, her body ached for his. Pulling away, she tugged her sweater up over her head, tossing it to the far corner. Grif moaned when he caught sight of her breasts in the pale peach satin bra and removed his hand from her ass to run a fingertip over her already hard nipple. Kendall gasped and reached up to cup her breasts in her hands, as if offering them to him. He leaned down and wrapped his lips around one satin cup, licking her through the fabric. It sent a shudder through her, but she knew it could feel better.
Reaching behind her back, she unhooked the bra, tossing it away into the darkness. Grif made a rumbling sound, almost like a lion purring, and it reverberated through her body. His ungloved hand moved to cup her right breast, and it made her want to purr as well. He weighed it in his hand, then drew his fingers in until he pinched her nipple.
Kendall gasped as he rolled it between his fingers and leaned into the pressure. Her own hands grasped his muscular waist, and she realized how overdressed he was. The shirt would stay on tonight, but he didn’t say she couldn’t explore. Tugging the shirttails from the slacks, she bunched them in her hands until she reached the end of the material. Brushing the backs of her knuckles against his tight abs, she pushed the shirt up his chest.
“Oh, my,” she sighed. Black hair furred his muscular chest, heavier over his pectorals, then narrowing into a trail down his stomach. There was just enough light to see a few pale marks on his body. She ran her fingers over one.
“Old scar,” he murmured.
Kendall could tell there was baggage there, but she didn’t want to deal with it tonight. She moved away from the scar and spanned her fingers over his rib cage.
Man, she’d worked with some hot guys before, but Grif would give them all a run for their money. His body was perfection, all ropey muscle and strength. It made her want to see more.
The button on his slacks wouldn’t release, and she thought about ripping the damn thing open, but she probably didn’t have the strength to do it. He brushed her away and unfastened it himself one-handed, then let her have access.
Tugging the zipper down slowly, she fought the impatience building inside her. He wore blue briefs and his erection strained the front. Dancing her fingers over his length, she caressed him through the fabric. His hips surged into her hand and his mouth found hers. Kendall moaned, slowly edging beyond coherent thought.
Jerking away, she skimmed her pants down her thighs, then her panties and wool socks. Goose bumps pebbled her skin, both from the chill of the room and from the heat i
n his gaze. Grif dropped his slacks and stepped out of his underwear, and it took everything she had not to collapse into a quivering puddle at his feet at the sight of his erection framed by the tails of his shirt. Arousal swamped her with heat, and when he pressed her back to the bed, she was more than ready.
As she used her arms to pull into the center of the mattress, he crawled after her. She was a little aggravated that she couldn’t see his body, only the hanging white dress shirt. But she didn’t say anything.
As he settled over top of her, all her aggravations drifted away. He pressed his hips to hers and Kendall thought she was going to combust. Just the length of him wedging into her slit was enough to make her gasp into his chest. Instinctively, she angled her legs up around his hips.
He grinned at her as he pressed her into the mattress. “Guess we don’t need a condom this time, huh?”
She choked on a laugh and buried her face against his neck. “No, I guess not. As long as you’re clean.”
“I am.”
He angled himself to lie on his right elbow, then reached down with his left hand to rub the head of himself into her moisture. Kendall cried out, her nails digging into his bare hips, trying to urge him closer.
“Oh, please,” she gasped, tension gripping her. “Inside. Please.”
Grif didn’t seem to have a great amount of control either, because he surged into her in one long stroke, mouth sealing to hers to catch her cry. Kendall contracted around him, more full than she could ever remember being.
As he pulled back, then slid home again, she knew release was mere seconds away. She’d dreamt and fantasized for weeks, but feeling him plunge into her body was so much better than any fantasy.
He shifted upright, then gripped her knees to angle them up to her chest. Kendall gasped as the head of his dick stroked over her g-spot. “Oh, Grif,” she moaned.
He slammed himself into her, over and over again, cranking her arousal higher than ever before. And in a breathless moment her orgasm crashed over her.
Kendall cried out, unable to do otherwise, and contracted around him sharply. Grif groaned and she opened her eyes in time to see pleasure wash over his harsh features as he rocked into her, his body no longer under his strict control. He jerked and his arms contracted around her. Kendall felt the heat from his ejaculation fill her womb and she held on until he collapsed against her.
Even in the cool room, their bodies were slicked with sweat. Kendall’s heart thumped, trying to fall into time with his. Grif levered himself up enough to look at her.
“Are you okay?”
She nodded. “Perfect.”
He pushed into her two more times, as if relishing the feel, before rolling away to the side.
Kendall blinked up at the ceiling, her body still quivering. “So much better than last time.”
Grif laughed aloud. “Well, thank you. I think. For me it was just as good as I remembered.”
She rolled her head to look at him, trying to see if he was telling the truth or not. His eyes connected with hers and she could only see sincerity. And that damn adorable dimple.
Looking away, she drew in a deep breath. “Well, I’m going to take a quick shower. You’re welcome to join me.”
Kendall snapped her mouth shut, angry at having forgotten about his arm. He probably wouldn’t be any more receptive now than before.
The silence from the bed behind her echoed as she got up and walked toward the bathroom. As she washed away the evidence from their lovemaking, she waited.
And waited.
But he never came.
When she stepped out of the steamy room a few minutes later, wrapped in a towel, he was no longer in the bedroom. For some reason, it didn’t surprise her.
On a purely selfish level, she was a little glad. A lot had happened recently. She didn’t want to have to deal with more issues than she had to right now.
The enormity of the decisions she had to make in the next few days weighed on her.
Barely even drying off, she curled up in bed and pulled the sheet and comforter over top of herself.
Kendall didn’t see Grif until the next morning, after her so-called breakfast. Now that she knew what the nausea signified, she’d been able to explore on the internet. She was one of the lucky millions of women that had to deal with morning sickness that hit throughout the day. She’d lost weight over the past couple of weeks, but apparently it was very normal in early pregnancies. She didn’t have the suggested crackers in her cupboard, so she ate a piece of dry toast. Not the most appealing, but her tummy quieted almost immediately.
Counting back, she realized she was only about two and a half weeks along. It wasn’t a difficult date to remember because it had been Christmas night when she’d mauled him. The only excuse she had was that she’d been especially lonely. Her father had gone to a party with Deedra and her mother hadn’t answered her calls. She’d found herself alone with a bottle of wine.
And a security guard she’d been having fantasies about for weeks.
When she typed “pregnancy” into the search box, literally millions of results popped up. She clicked on the first one, and lost herself in information.
Grif found her hunched over her laptop keyboard, writing furiously in a notebook. She glanced up when he walked in and was caught by the hesitation in his eyes.
She smiled, trying to appear calm and collected, though her heartbeat picked up as he moved closer to her. When he leaned down to press his lips to hers, she cradled his freshly shaved cheek in her hand. “Good morning.”
“Good morning,” he rumbled.
He set a familiar green and white paper cup beside her on the desk and she stared at him in surprise. On their way in to work, they always drove through for coffee. She was touched that he had thought to get it for her.
“I thought you might be needing some energy this morning.”
His eyes narrowed with humor and Kendall had to laugh. “Oh, you are completely right. Thank you.”
She paused to look at him for a moment, struck by how much things had changed in the past few days. He’d been her difficult, unbendable bodyguard less than forty-eight hours ago, but now they were going to have to reevaluate his position. She had a flashback from the encounter last night and embarrassment sent a flush through her cheeks. Maybe job description wound be better phrasing. She rushed to cover.
“The new guard seems nice.”
Grif had cocked his head to look at her. She knew he’d seen her embarrassment, but didn’t know what had caused it. “Yeah, Ortiz is a good guy. Hyper aware so he’ll spot anything out of the ordinary. I’ve lost my objectivity.”
“I’m sorry, Grif. I’ve put us both in such an awkward position. That night was so out of character for me. I think with the holiday I just got lonely, which made me drink too much. I never get like that.”
He shrugged as he pulled a chair from the dining room table, a few feet away. “I think it was inevitable that something would happen. I’ve been drawn to you since the first time I met you.”
She stared at him in surprise. “Really?”
He nodded once. “But I didn’t know until that night how hungry you were as well.”
Blood rushed into her cheeks in a full-out blush and she buried her face in her hands. “Oh, god.”
Chuckling, he tipped her face up with his good hand. “Believe me, I appreciated it. I don’t get molested like that very often anymore.”
He made a vague motion with his prosthetic.
“Oh, please.” She made a face. “You get hit on all the time in the office. And the coffee shops. Hell, everywhere you go you’ve got women hanging on your every move, waiting for you to flash that dimple.”
Kendall snapped her mouth shut, shocked at just how much she’d been bothered by all those women. Not to mention Grif’s cool, measured, smiling responses.
The man in question grinned at her, his variegated eyes flashing, until he broke into laughter.
“Y
ou’re a hard nut to crack, Kendall Herrington. No lie, I thought you were the ice queen from hell for the first week.”
She frowned. “I didn’t mean to be, but Dad had just told me about hiring you and I wasn’t happy. I’ve had security details before, but never twenty-four hour coverage. With you guys in the separate apartment now, it’s hardly an issue. At first it was a pain in the ass.”
He crossed his arms, watching her. “Understood. And honestly, with your background, I expected to be babysitting a brat. No offense.”
“None taken,” she sighed.
It had been the same many times over. Because she’d been a model and had acted in a few things, people expected her to be spoiled and difficult to handle. There were definitely people like that, but she’d prided herself on not being one of them.
She glanced at Grif, shocked at the change in him. But maybe they’d both changed. They realized that at least some of their guardedness had to come down if they were going to make this situation work.
Or not.
“I like you, Grif. But I don’t think we should get married.”
His expression didn’t change, but his eyes cooled.
“Why not?”
Kendall sighed and leaned back in her office chair. “Because we would be compounding a problem. Yes, the pregnancy puts me into an uncomfortable position at the company, but it would still be uncomfortable if I married you on the spur of a moment. It will be embarrassing either way I go.”
His jaw hardened and she realized what she’d said. She reached out to rest her hand on his arm. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean that directed at you specifically. Just the situation.”
He motioned with the hand she held, disengaging her touch. “What other concerns do you have?”
“Well,” she sighed, “I know you’re probably a great guy, but we don’t know each other. Yes, we’re getting along right now, but what about five months down the road when I’m screaming at you because I’m so emotional and we can’t stand the sight of each other? That’s not a good environment to bring up a child.”
Uniform Desires (Make Mine Military Romance) Page 47