by Trey Parker
“Yea, you and me both,” said Tina.
Latoya looked towards Tina. “But Tina, I really can’t thank you enough for this. You didn’t have to open up your place for me, but you did. I appreciate you.”
“Spsssss. Girl, it’s nothing, we have plenty of room. We have to look out for each other. We have five guest rooms, we probably won’t even see each other that often.”
“Yep. I’ll be as quiet as a mouse. You won’t even know I’m here. This property is so big we’ll have to use walkie talkies to communicate. It’s really inspirational though. You are really doing it big! I knew you were living, but I didn’t know you were living like this!”
“Well, you know I make pretty good money at PWC… but I don’t make THIS much. You know I can’t afford this house. This is all Marvin.”
“That’s what I’m saying. You hit the jackpot with him. I’m just hoping I find a man of this caliber.”
Tina blushed and held her hand to the sky, “Well I am blessed. I’m not going to sit here and act like I’m not. You know it ain’t all about the money with him… I really love him regardless. He’s just a solid man that handles his business. That’s all. Very humble. Very generous. Laid back. You’ll meet him, soon. You’ll like him I’m sure. He’ll be home any minute now.”
“How’d you meet him again?” asked Latoya.
“He was one of my clients at PWC. Usually my clients are old white men. But I got assigned to Marvin and there was just chemistry immediately. We started meeting outside of work then the rest was history.”
“Well, find out if he got some rich friends. Shit. I’m single and ready to mingle,” said Latoya.
“Ha ha, I’ll ask when he gets here. I don’t think so though. If so, I haven’t seen any good looking ones,” said Tina.
The front door open alert came on.
“Speaking of the devil. Let me introduce you,” said Tina walking towards the front entrance.
Marvin had on a brown suit jacket with black dress pants. He was on the phone. He was talking on some type of Bluetooth headset. He had a briefcase in hand. Bald. Dark brown skin. With a small mustache. He stood at about 5’8”.
“Let me call you back. I just got in the door,” said Marvin.
“Hey hun, we were just talking about you...” said Tina going up to him and kissing him on the lips.
“I hope it was something good,” he said smiling.
“This is Latoya. Well, we call her Toy. My friend that I told you about that’s going to be staying with us for awhile, until she gets back on for feet.”
“Nice to meet you,” he said holding his hand out.
“Same here. Thank you for letting me stay.”
“Anytime. If you’re Tina’s friend then you’re like family to me. Plus, we have plenty of room here that we never use and we’re never home,” he said.
“Oh, and baby I told her all about what you do and how you may be able to help her find some work. Maybe y’all can set up a meeting or something soon,” Tina suggested.
“Yea we can meet in a week or so. Actually, how’s next Monday 9:30 a.m. at Starbucks?”
“Well, I don’t have a job right now so it works for me,” says Latoya jokingly.
“Alright. I’ll put you on my calendar,” he looked at Tina. “Baby, I have to hop back on this conference call with some business partners, I’ll be in my office. I’ll speak with you all later,” he said walking towards another part of the house where his office was.
“Go handle business,” Tina shooed him away. She looked at Latoya. “So, what do you think?”
“He seems like a nice wholesome, guy. But like I said, if you loved me you’d hook me up with one of his rich friends.”
“I will, girl.”
Seeing how Tina lived was very inspiring. It made Latoya really want to get her life together. Not only did Tina have a great job working in accounting at PWC, her man was a multi-millionaire business owner. Not to mention that he was named on Atlanta’s top 40 under 40 list for the most successful movers and shakers in the city. Latoya didn’t think she could land a good, wholesome man like Marvin, because her resume wasn’t good enough. A good successful man wouldn’t want to wife up with a college dropout that was jobless. In Latoya’s eyes, Tina had won in life. Tina and Latoya are almost the same age. But sometimes it doesn’t feel like it to Latoya. She just felt like Tina was so far ahead of her in life.
1
NAKED HUSTLE
1
NAKED HUSTLE
13. Résumé Submission
Monday 9:15 a.m.
The baristas were swift on their feet as they took customer orders and prepared to pour the strong liquid goodness in everyone’s cups. People were anxious but patient as they waited in line for the typical morning boost. The strong smell of crushed coffee beans had Latoya alert in Starbucks. The place was so crowded she barely could find an open seat. People were doing everything from reading newspapers, to having business meetings, to doing college coursework. Latoya had her padfolio in hand. But no resume. She just had a notepad. And she had a suit on.
"Latoya?" said Marvin as he walked towards her table.
"Nice to see you again. I barely see you around the house,” Latoya said.
“Yep. Because I’m always, working. But. Wow. You look...great," he said while taking a seat across from her.
"Thank you. I guess you haven’t really seen me dressed outside of house clothes."
"No. You look great in house clothes as well. Tina should've warned me about you before you moved in," said Marvin with a chuckle.
"Thank you, I guess she should’ve." She felt awkward.
"So, I hear that you're looking for a job?" he asked.
"Yes I am. I'm looking for work."
"Ok. Well, what do you know about my company?" Marvin asked.
"I don't know much. To be honest, I just know that you own your own construction company."
"Oookay. So yes, that is true. It’s called M&M Construction. It’s an exciting time to be in construction because of all the new developments that are happening in Atlanta. Right now, I'm looking for an assistant project manager."
"This all sounds great Marvin. But I do want to let you know that I don't have much of a construction background. Like, at all."
"Of course, I knew that. Most people don't. That's why it’s an assistant project manager. You'll learn from the project manager for a year or so. Helping them with all of their contracts. You'll have firsthand on-the-job-training. And you'll make pretty good money doing it too."
"Ok. What's the pay structure, if you don't mind me asking?"
"75K. "
"Damn. I'd love that. So, what else do you need from me."
"It’s pretty much your position. So, all that you have to do is fill out an application. We will do a quick verification to confirm our minimum requirements which are a bachelor’s degree, no felonies, things of that nature."
"Wait. Background check? To verify what? My degree? My word isn't good enough?" she asked.
"Well, although I'm the owner, I can't just throw you on the payroll and give you a hard hat. There is still a process that you have to go through to be hired officially. We have over 100 employees, that all go through the same application process. This is a big operation here."
"Well to be honest, when I was younger I got in a little trouble and ended up with a felony. And what if I don't have a bachelor’s degree?"
"Then you don't have a position. That's a minimum requirement. You do have one, right?”
"I thought Tina told you, that I didn’t officially finish.”
"Oh, well in that case there's nothing that I can do for you. I was already sticking my neck out a mile to give you this position, but that's just something that I can't do,” said Marvin attempting to get up.
"Wait. So, what can you do? Can you change up the requirements?"
"Unfortunately, No. You're already unqualified as it is with no experience. There's no way that
I can take you. I have a board of directors and stakeholders that I have to answer to. There’s no way that I would be able to give an explanation on why I have a degreeless, felon as an assistant project manager.”
Latoya grabbed his arm, "Marvin, please. I need this position. What do I have to do? I'm desperate at this point. I'm begging you," she said looking at him in his eyes.
Marvin stood there. He said nothing. He looked at her hand grabbing his. He then took a seat.
“Ok. I will make you an offer. But you have to be an open-minded individual and you have to promise me that you can keep a secret.”
“I’m very open minded and I can definitely keep a secret,” said Latoya.
"Ok. If you want this position, give me one night with you," he said looking her in the eye.
"What do you mean one night with me?"
Marvin looked away. "You know exactly what I mean. One night. You come to my place, and handle your business and then, the job is yours."
Latoya couldn't believe her ears, "Are you blackmailing me? For sex? Did I just hear that right?"
Marvin leaned forward. "Latoya. This is not a blackmail, this is the price of me jeopardizing my whole career, and everything that I have built for you."
"You are fucking sick. The answer is a hell no. And I'm telling Tina."
"Latoya, Think about this. Who is going to really be the loser? Not me. Tina wants me more than I want her. She loves me. I'm rich, ok. She'll never find a dude as rich as me that she truly loves and loves her. She wants a wedding ring. So, you going to her with these allegations are just going to complicate that. She'll choose me over you. Then you’ll just be homeless again. Believe me. Plus, you have no degree, no skills, and you’re a felon, so no one on this green earth is going to hire you and give you the experience and the pay that I am willing to offer you. So, here's my card. I'll give you a week or so to think about it," Marvin said as he winked and left.
She was dumbfounded. She thought about calling Tina immediately as Marvin walked out the door. She had her phone in her hand, dialing in her number. But she stopped. She was afraid. She didn’t know why. The coward in her didn't let her call. She didn’t want to create that drama between them at the time. She would just complicate things even more. Her anger and disgust for Marvin made her apply for every job opening in Atlanta. She was going to do this to show him.
She was in her room minding her business when Tina walked in.
“Soooo. How’d it go?!”
“How did what go?”
“The meeting, girl! With Marvin.”
“Oh. Oh that. Yea it went good…I’m not sure if it’s going to work out though because of my experience. Plus, I technically still don’t have a degree so I think I’m just going to apply for other jobs,”
“Ugh. I knew he was going to say something about that. I’ll talk to him for you.”
“No. It’s fine Tina, I’m sure I can find a good paying job, I just have to look harder.”
“No. Toya, I’m telling you. With just a high school diploma, it’s going to be tough. With no skills, few people are going to hire you. I’ll talk to Marvin about maybe getting you a paid internship or something. He owns the whole damn company. He can do what he wants. I’ll drip on him a little, he’ll eventually turn around. But in the meantime, go ahead and start applying.”
“Tina… I have a something important I need to tell you.”
Beep. Beep. Latoya heard the front door alert. Marvin was home.
“What’s up?” Tina asked.
“Ummmm. Nothing. I’m just glad you gave me the opportunity to stay here. I’m forever indebted to you for this. Thank you again for caring.”
“Anytime girl. That’s what friends are for.”
It had been three weeks since her meeting with Marvin. She felt like she had applied for every job in Atlanta. She felt like she had gotten every rejection letter that was ever sent out, too. Her email was full of, "We regret to inform you, or we are considering other candidates." Most legitimate jobs required a bachelor’s degree. Others, didn't and they still weren't interested. Jobs paying $12 an hour weren’t even returning her calls. It was because she had never really had a job. Ever. Not in college, and not even in high school.
Cafe Circa
Latoya was at a bar. She didn't have enough money to buy a drink. But she damn sure needed one. She waited patiently for a guy to offer her one. She sat there trying to figure out her life. Time was winding down.
An older guy with a drink in his hand comes to sit next to her.
"Hey! What's your name?"
"Toya. And you?"
"Robert. Nice to meet you. What's with the long face? You're too beautiful to be sad."
"Oh nothing. I'm ok. Just a lot on my mind right now."
"Well, let me buy you a drink, that's the least I can do."
Finally. She said in her head. "Yes, that's fine."
"Bartender, let me get four shots of tequila," said Robert.
"Wait. Four shots? I meant just a drink."
"What type of drink do you want?"
“Ummm. Sex on the beach.”
Robert got the bartender's attention again, "Sex on the beach on top of those shots please."
"Are you taking all of those shots?"
"They are for both of us. Two for me, two for you. You look like you need them."
"I guess I do,” said Latoya.
Robert and Latoya took the shots together. Then she started on her sex on the beach. She was feeling good.
"Robert. You ever had to make a hard decision?"
"All the time."
"But I mean like a really hard decision. That could possibly jeopardize a friendship forever. Like a make or break decision."
"Sometimes, you have to do what you have to do. Life is all about taking chances. You just have to be able to live with those decisions after the fact," said Robert taking a sip of his drink.
"Right. Because, sometimes we have to put our pride to the side. We may have to do things that we may regret. But say fuck it."
"Yea. Sometimes."
She pulled her purse out. She looked through it. She pulled out Marvin's card. She looked at it for a second. She texted his cell phone.
"I’ll accept your offer. But it has to be tonight before I change my mind."
She sent the text message.
"Two more shots Robert? Two for me, two for you."
"Of course. Bartender! Four more shots of tequila, please."
"Thank you."
"So, you're going to give me your number, right?"
"Is that the cost of you buying me drinks?" asked Toya.
"No. I did that out of the kindness of my heart. But I mean I bought them because I want to get to know you outside of this bar."
She heard her phone go off. It was a text message.
“Ok. Just meet me at the W downtown. Be there at a decent time please,” the text read.
The bartender brought the shots out. She grabbed both shots and Robert grabbed his.
"Let's make a toast to tough decisions and taking risks in life," she held the shots up with both hands. Robert nodded then they downed them together.
"Wooohooo!" they both said as they finished.
"Ok. So, about that number?" said Robert.
"I'm sorry, Robert. I have to go. I don't give my number out. Find me on Facebook. Latoya Robertson."
Latoya texted Marvin to send her an Uber to take her to the W. She was drunk. Really drunk. But she needed to be. This was the only way that she would be able to do what she was about to do.
The Uber driver came and she was on her way. The drive felt like she was on a roller coaster. With all the turns. As they were pulling up to the W driveway she received a text from Marvin.
"755"
Latoya was so drunk that she almost didn’t recognize what it meant. But it was his room number. She was on the elevator, feeling nothing but numbness. She liked it that way.
She got to the fl
oor. Every step that she took, felt heavy as if her legs were turning into tree trunks. She got to the door. Knock knock knock! The door opened.
Marvin stood there. Fully dressed, as if he had just got in the room. He motioned her in.
"So, you finally came to your senses," he said.
"Please... don't go there, I still can change my mind."
"You know what, you're right. Let's keep this professional."
"Let's be clear, If I do this, I will have a job making 75K a year, at your company, with the same position that you presented.”
"Yes. Just as I proposed."
"Let's shake on it," she held her hand out. He held his hand out and shook it.
"Ok. Let’s get this over with," she said as she walked to the bathroom to undress.
"You need something to drink?" he said.
"Nope, I'm already drunk," she said as she closed the door.
She slipped her dress off. She took her heels off. She took her bra and panties off. She looked in the mirror and took a deep breath. She wrapped a towel around herself then she came out.
He had gotten naked under the covers. He looked at her.
"Take that damn towel off. Get comfortable.”
She rolled her eyes. "You got some more liquor?"
"I thought you were drunk?"
"Not drunk enough."
He poured her a glass of Dom Perignon. She downed the shot. After she finished, Marvin pulled the towel off of her. He looked her up and down.
"MMmmmm. Damn, you look even better naked."
"Shut up, just hurry up and do whatever you need to do," she said annoyed.
As drunk as she was, she was still not attracted to him, not one bit. She was extremely uncomfortable. He laid her on the bed. All she tried to think about was having a job. Having money to pay for her own place. Having a career. Anything to make sense of her current situation.
He spread her legs. He started kissing on the inside of her thighs, then he came up and started sucking on her nipples. He came up to try to kiss her. She moved her head immediately to the right.