Kiss Like a Fist: A Paranormal Harem Pulp Novel (Hell's Belles Book 1)

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Kiss Like a Fist: A Paranormal Harem Pulp Novel (Hell's Belles Book 1) Page 1

by Jake Richter




  Kiss Like A Fist

  Hells Belles Book 1

  Jake Richter

  Contents

  Chapter 1

  Chapter 2

  Chapter 3

  Chapter 4

  Chapter 5

  Chapter 6

  Chapter 7

  Chapter 8

  Chapter 9

  Chapter 10

  Chapter 11

  Chapter 12

  Chapter 13

  Chapter 14

  Chapter 15

  Chapter 16

  Chapter 17

  Chapter 18

  Chapter 19

  Chapter 20

  Chapter 21

  Chapter 22

  Chapter 23

  Chapter 24

  Chapter 25

  Chapter 26

  Chapter 27

  Chapter 28

  Chapter 29

  Chapter 30

  Chapter 31

  Chapter 32

  Chapter 33

  Chapter 34

  Chapter 35

  Chapter 36

  Chapter 37

  Chapter 38

  Chapter 39

  END of BOOK 1

  Author Notes

  About the Author

  Copyright 2018 by Jake Richter

  This is a work of fiction and all rights are reserved by the author. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in or introduced into a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means (electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise) without the prior written permission of the copyright owner.

  Created with Vellum

  1

  As Alex Archer stood with his back near a wall, facing off against the ravenous, sex-starved succubi, a single thought sprang to mind.

  How the heck am I gonna get off?

  The Otherworld that is.

  It hadn’t been easy to reach the Otherworld, but there he was, bloodied but not broken, stranded in a castle set in a mystical wasteland that functioned as a way-station, a no-man’s-land populated by the galaxy’s castoffs, misfits, and a large number of nasty creatures who fed off the sex and blood of strangers. But now the trick was to hold onto the sickle and find a way out while remaining in one piece, which wasn’t gonna be easy.

  Yep, based on current events, he was about to be screwed in more ways than one. But it wasn’t the prospect of possibly being sexual fodder in some intergalactic orgy, and then promptly drained of his bodily fluids afterward, that troubled him. What bothered him was that the most challenging week of his life was about to come to an end, and these past few days had been, in a weird way, the most enjoyable of his young life.

  And just as he was processing the significance of this, one of the succubi shrieked. Alex looked up, distracted by the creatures, a writhing mass of shapely women with achingly beautiful faces, globular breasts, short leathery wings, and the scaled lower bodies of serpents. The women hissed and stabbed their fingers in Alex’s direction.

  Once you go succubus, you never go back, Alex thought with a grim smile.

  The succubi were gathered at the end of a long dank corridor, effectively blocking the way out of the massive, vault-like castle.

  “Give us what we need!” the lead succubus shrieked. Her wings arched violently upward. She was tired of asking. “Give us the sickle!”

  Alex squeezed his eyes shut and moved the sickle between his hands, back and forth, back and forth. The object felt good, and soon he was twirling it, swinging it so violently that it seemed to rip the air as it vibrated like a tuning fork.

  A pulse of violet light beamed from the spike on the end of the sickle and this seemed to enrage the succubi.

  Alex adopted a defensive posture. If he had to fight before he fled, so be it. He realized he’d have to take his chance. It was either fight his way through the succubi or head in the other direction to confront a possibly still-alive (and very pissed off) Grimwood.

  The lead succubus thrust up a hand, her mouth unhinging. “ATTACK!”

  Two red-headed succubi advanced, slithering across the stone, their arms telescoping out to rip Alex apart, a human appetizer ready to be served bloody.

  Alex brought the sickle around, swiping it left and right, bringing it down and across the first red-headed succubi in one impossibly fast cutting motion. A thick rope of black blood spurted, the creature’s head leaving her shoulders.

  The head rolled like a discarded coin as Alex gut-stabbed the next monster, kicking her back, pivoting for the rest of the attackers.

  “COME GET SOME!” he shouted.

  The lead succubus glared daggers at Alex, one hand tracing the curve of her breasts. “Resistance will only increase your pain and our pleasure!”

  Alex smiled. “Tease!”

  The rest of the succubi charged him, surging forward, their bodies so tightly packed in the corridor that they gouged holes in the walls. They grabbed handfuls of the crumbling structure and hurled them at Alex.

  Alex deftly sidestepped and ducked under the incoming rock, whipping the sickle, turning the larger projectiles into pebbles. Then he went on the attack, leaping forward, slicing open throats, hacking and slashing, as the succubi fell in twos and threes. Alex wiped away the blood that freckled his brow and arms. Only two of the bitches remained.

  He shook blood from the end of the sickle. “Is that all you’ve got?”

  A blonde succubus flew past Alex’s head, her talon-like fingers barely missing him, tickling the edge of Alex’s neck.

  The succubus bounced off a wall and rolled over, her right arm shattered horribly, bone poking through blood-splotched pallid flesh. She found her legs and Alex lunged, lodging the sickle in her chest. He planted a foot on her shoulder to lever it free, turning as—

  WHAM!

  A fist came out of nowhere and slammed into Alex’s jaw, sending him tumbling back against the far wall.

  He sagged and then struggled back up, blinking away the cloudy vision and fireworks that accompanied the punch. He looked into the smoldering emerald eyes of the lead succubus, the one who’d sucker punched him. She was naked from the waist up, her green tongue darting between oversized teeth.

  “Give me the godsdamned sickle!” the succubus hissed.

  “Why do you want it so badly?”

  “It has the power over life and death.”

  Alex held the sickle up. “You’re gonna have to pry it from my cold, dead hands.”

  The succubus’s eyes enlarged to twice their normal size. “I’M GOING TO SWALLOW YOU WHOLE!”

  Alex grinned. “Now that’s impossible.”

  Alex squeezed every muscle in his body as he gripped the sickle. Its energy coursed through him with a powerful kinetic transferring process. He could feel every cell in his body firing at the same time.

  The succubus moved up and down, squaring up on Alex who twirled the sickle like it was a quarterstaff.

  “Are you ready to cross over?!” the succubus howled.

  “I’m not crossing anywhere, bitch.”

  “Strong words for a small man.”

  Alex grinned. “Lady, just a few days ago I was a bartender, living paycheck to paycheck. Then I met a girl, and let me tell you, she’s a keeper. And when you find the right one well, you’re willing to go to any lengths to make her happy. Besides, if I get past you, maybe, just possibly, I can get a shot at saving the universe. I mention this only because as a guy who’s got nothing, ain’t got nothing to lose, I might be the baddest motherfucker you ever came across. So I’ll say it again: if yo
u want some, come and get it.”

  The succubus hesitated and then she heaved herself at Alex.

  Alex dropped low and brought the sickle up as time and sound slowed.

  For a moment he was transported back in time, remembering how it all began, remembering the words his grandfather had always spoken in impossible situations: “When one door closes, another one opens.” Of course, his grandfather had uttered those words right before going out on an exploration from which he never returned, so there was that…

  Alex looked up and the succubus fell on top of him as darkness devoured everything.

  2

  Seven Days Earlier…

  When one door closes, another door opens, Alex thought. Whenever he was having a shitty day, he’d fall back on those words spoken by his grandfather—a seeker of the paranormal and unexplained. Alex was close to his grandfather growing up until his disappearance nine months earlier. He always admired his grandfather for his sense of adventure and determination, and he wished that he could be just like him in one way or the other. Alex repeated the phrase out loud, reciting it like a mantra. Originally based on some religious parable he’d forgotten about, this pearl of wisdom was reassuring, and gave him strength and courage in times of trouble. Although today, it seemed these words weren’t going to help him find his boss’s baby.

  Alex finished washing his hands and stared at himself in the bathroom mirror at The Rhea, a VIP club where he tended bar. The establishment, which was a place where the rich and spoiled went to drink, dance and fuck, got its name from the mother of all the gods which was entirely appropriate since Alex was staring down the mother of all problems. He’d lent his boss’s seventy-thousand dollar Dodge Challenger SRT Hellcat to his best buddy, Spence, and neither had been seen for several hours. If he didn’t have the car back pronto, his boss, Mister Fincher, was gonna have his ass in a sling.

  The Challenger had last been seen entering Fat Joe’s car wash about two hours ago. However, the muscle car—canary yellow with three black claw marks stenciled on its spoiler— was never seen exiting.

  Alex cringed when he thought about it. What had he been thinking, giving the car to Spence, a guy who was long on loyalty but short on common sense? He felt bad for the guy, especially after Spence’s mother kicked him out of the house again, but his mother’s house was a mansion after all. He’d hoped that giving Spence the task of taking care of the car would get him out of his funk. Spence had always been there for Alex, especially when his grandfather disappeared without a trace almost nine months ago. He’d helped Alex post missing flyers and stayed up until the wee hours trying to piece together clues that turned out to be dead ends. He was there when it mattered the most. Still, Spence had grown up to be reliably unreliable. Although Alex kept a soft spot for his friend’s antics, he realized he’d made a terrible mistake. Fincher was gonna kill him.

  Sure, Alex could bring in the patrons because he was a whiz at mixing drinks and a savant when it came to coming up with unique marketing angles to keep the house dancing until the sun woke up. Alex made Fincher money by being creative, a pathfinder. Always finding a way through lean times better than anyone, it seemed, and that was cool.

  But Fincher had a habit of forgetting all the good Alex had done for him. Moreover, Fincher was, on most days, an asshole with a purpose, and that purpose was to be more of an asshole than any other asshole in life. The bottom line was that Alex, like all other employees, was expendable.

  Alex ran his hand through the thick snarl of curls on his head and considered his options. His pensive brown eyes searched for a bright side. He thought about getting another job, or simply trying to find a way to pursue his passion for hunting the unexplained and seeking exotic treasures, just like his crazy grandfather.

  Of course, if he did quit, he’d have to move because his crazed sex-kitten housemate, Giselle, liked his portion of the rent to be paid on time much more than she liked having a piece of eye candy as a roommate. Giselle definitely wanted to be paid and laid—in that order.

  Alex’s head continued to swim in a sea of “what ifs” and it was starting to annoy him. Worry was not productive. There were worse fates in life. Hell, he could be a salesperson. Or worse, a door-to-door salesman. Alex inhaled deeply and then exhaled. His focus improved and his heartbeat slowed. Calmly, he repeated his grandfather’s words: “When one door closes, another door opens.”

  A hand rapped against the bathroom door. “Hey! Dude, you fall in or what?” a male voice asked.

  Alex’s smile faded quickly. He recognized the voice. It was Spence. “Did you get Fincher’s baby back?”

  “Does he really call it his baby? I mean, is he breastfeeding it?” Spence replied.

  Alex snatched the doorknob and yanked the door open. He tried to suppress his grin at the sight of Spence standing before him, a little sweaty and totally disheveled. Alex watched as Spence smirked while cleaning his Clark Kent glasses.

  Alex knew this look. “Dude, seriously?”

  “I’m in love.”

  “Where’s the car?”

  Spence grinned. “Relax, man. I met a girl. She’s like the best car wash cashier I have ever met. She’s amazing and has some really special dreams. More importantly, she’s flexible and smells like pine.”

  Alex shook his head. “Dude, tonight’s the Mayhem with Masks party. Fincher’s going to poop a coronary if that car isn’t back before he wakes up. And I still gotta get the bar ready.”

  “Yeah, he seemed a little annoyed when he left his office.”

  “He’s up right now?” Alex asked.

  “As upright as a caveman with cheap cologne can be.”

  Alex rolled his eyes. “I let you borrow the car and—?”

  “I got side-tracked. I’m sorry, m’man. I know you were trying to lift my spirits, and between my mom’s kicking me to the curb and my weakness for girls that are into cosplay. I just got carried away. I let you down and I’m sorry.”

  Alex shook his head. “Did you get some at least?”

  “Well, I did give her a joy ride.”

  “I bet. What did she give you?”

  Spence shrugged. “Won’t know until the tests come back, but nothing itches so I’m taking that as a good sign.”

  Before Alex could respond, Fincher appeared.

  Fincher had a couple of rolls of toilet paper in his meaty hands. “Archer! When I’m done, we need to talk!” Fincher lumbered back into his private office.

  Alex looked at Spence and hissed, “Keys!”

  Spence dangled the keys. “Fincher had two rolls of TP, bro. We could be in his car and down the road with a few hot chicks, a thirty pack and a little white! Let’s ride!”

  “Two words, Spence.”

  “Hot. Chicks?”

  “No. Grand larceny.” Alex opened his hand, and Spence tossed him the keys. “Thanks for the offer. You stickin’ around tonight?”

  “If I can, yeah. Last time you did Mayhem with Masks, I got to do a ninety-six with Rey and Princess Leia.”

  “I thought it was called a sixty-nine,” Alex said.

  “That’s how many minutes we lasted.”

  “Right. Maybe on another planet. Here on Earth, it was ninety-six seconds!”

  Spence laughed and flipped Alex the bird as he darted away, moving through the hallway on the second floor of the expansive club.

  A couple of VIP lounge rooms filled the space on either side of the hallway. Usually the doors were closed but tonight one was wide open. That was unusual since Fincher liked to keep them secure because of the fully stocked bar and various other party favors that were for the taking.

  Alex dipped his head inside. Nothing to see but he felt a tingle, an electric current accompanied by the strong scent of warm vanilla.

  “Anyone in here?”

  Aside from the plush lounge chairs with their red velvet seats and high faux-leather backs, it was empty. A motion-detector started up the flat screens on the walls, which were t
uned into the club’s closed-circuit TV. Alex could see himself on one monitor as he eased through the room. He could also see other rooms throughout the club including the dance floor, bar, swinger’s room complete with a sex swing and a few other areas. The evening rush hadn’t started yet, so everything was rather quiet and still.

  He inched a little farther towards the other end of the room that featured a window that provided a bird’s eye view of the dance room below on the first floor. VIP patrons could check out the action while enjoying their privacy. Alex didn’t see anyone down below.

  WHAM!

  The door slammed tight behind Alex. He jumped. His heart raced, but he wasn’t scared. He liked the adrenaline boost. A natural upper for him since he was straight edge. No dope, no coke, no drink or smoke. Kept his mind clear and body strong. Plus, it made his bartending skills above average which equaled better tips.

  Alex grabbed the doorknob to exit the VIP room.

  It wouldn’t budge.

  Suddenly, time and sound seemed to slow.

  The air began to hum as if a hundred tuning forks had been struck at the same time, and he felt something behind him…a presence. The energy in the room changed, a current running through the air, trailed by that scent he’d smelled before. The tang of…what was it? Warm vanilla. The odor was tantalizing and alluring and utterly feminine. Alex didn’t even have to turn to know that whatever, whoever was standing behind him was a woman.

 

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